It's 1am as you stare at the crack in the ceiling. The wind rustles through the oak tree outside as you hear Jim next door drag his garbage can down the driveway. Pam's staying at her sister's because of her divorce, the kids get up at 6, and Katherine demanded chocolate chip pancakes with whipped cream and sprinkles. You have to catch the train at 7, and on top of that the big meeting is at 9am sharp and the Jenkins file isn't even done yet! How are you supposed to fall asleep when making your way in the world today takes everything you've got? The answer? Jinkx Monsoon's patented 4-step program: "Takin' a Break From All Your Worries Sure Would Help A Lot." In just four easy steps, your mind will be whisper quiet and you'll be counting sheep in no time. Step 1: turn on your television set. Step 2: Find your local programming guide to locate syndicated airings of Cheers. Step 3: Watch Sam, Diane, Coach, Norm, Cliff, Carla, Woody, Frasier, Lillith, & Rebecca navigate life's roller-coaster of joy and pain in the titular bar and escape from the doldrums of the rat race with a live studio audience and light alcoholism. Step 4: Fall Asleep and get enough shuteye to slay the ever-loving shit out of that Jenkins file.

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Follow Jinkx: @TheJinkx

Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel

Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo

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