How often do you feel that deep need for someone to text or call you—some acknowledgment they’re thinking of you? When you have that intense desire to hear from somebody, maybe spending hours thinking about them, they become your Band-Aid. How so? Look at what happens when you DO hear from them. Do all the muscles in your body become momentarily relaxed? Maybe you even feel a kind of rush or euphoria. Suddenly you feel back in control (although it’s a false sense of control). This feeling translates to being in a comfort zone where you’re no longer on edge.

Band-Aids are what we use to avoid feel disappointment, pain or other unwanted emotions. Often these feelings overwhelmed us as kids so we developed a pattern to blunt them in order to get through life. As an adult, these early pains can be reawakened, with an emptiness screaming inside when we are in an attached relationship. We feel like we’re being emotionally abandoned all over again so we need our Band-Aid to momentarily feel better. Learn how this just perpetuates the cycle and keeps us more attached; learn how to gently remove the Band-Aid.