Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Friendship Advice for Kids (K-8)

Ep. 164 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Avoiding empathy blindspots | Friendship advice for kids

FREE guide for parents: 12 ways to help your child make friends

https://drfriendtastic.com/gift/

Parents, check out my online workshops for kids at workshops.eileenkennedymoore.com.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?

SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

Like the podcast? Check out my books at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.

*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

- Sometimes kids think they only have to be kind to people they know and like. What could you say to argue against that idea?

- What do you expect from a close friend? What do you expect from someone who is not your friend? How and why are these expectations different?

- Why would it be unkind to have a party and invite everyone in a group except one person? What could you do instead?

- What is an empathy blindspot?

- How might being mean to someone end up hurting you?

*** You might also like these podcast episodes:

Ep. 154 - Friends say she’s bossy, but they’re bossy (Lola, Age 8)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/friends-say-shes-bossy-but-theyre

Ep. 141 - Can we be friends with anyone? (Michael, Age 9)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep141-can-we-be-friends-with-anyone-michael-age9

Ep. 71 - Is she a friend or not? (Tali, Age 11)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep71-tali-age-11-is-she-a-friend-or-not

Ep. 163 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Why friends lie and what to do about it | Friendship advice for kids

FREE guide for parents: 12 ways to help your child make friends

https://drfriendtastic.com/gift/

Parents, check out my online workshops for kids at workshops.eileenkennedymoore.com.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?

SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

Like the podcast? Check out my books at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.

*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

- Why is it sometimes hard for kids to tell the truth? (Hint: What might they be afraid could happen if they tell the truth?)

- What’s the difference between lying and saying something that’s not true? (Hint: What are some examples of statements that are not true but also not a lie?)

- How might telling lies hurt a friendship?

- Do you think telling a lie can ever be a kind thing to do? Why or why not?

- Why is it not a good idea to accuse a friend of being a liar?

*** You might also like these podcast episodes:

Ep. 140 - Friend lies and boasts (Martha, Age 9)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep140-friend-lies-and-boasts-martha-age-9

Ep. 20 - Lying friend (Anna, Age 9)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-20-anna

Ep. 115 - Her lies hurt her friendship (Sofia, Age 8)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep115-her-lies-hurt-her-friendships-sofia-age8

Ep. 162 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Prevent conflict from exploding into drama | Friendship advice for kids

FREE guide for parents: 12 ways to help your child make friends

https://drfriendtastic.com/gift/

Parents, check out my online workshops for kids at workshops.eileenkennedymoore.com.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?

SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

Like the podcast? Check out my books at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.

*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

- What’s the difference between friendship drama versus conflict?

- Why do you think some people get involved in more friendship drama than others?

- What are some ways to prevent conflict from turning into drama?

- Dr. Friendtastic suggests avoiding saying “You always…”, or “You never…” or “You think…” or “You’re just trying to…” Why are these comments unhelpful? (Hint: How would your friend be likely to respond if you said them?)

*** You might also like these podcast episodes:

Ep. 91 - Arguments with a friend (Kenna & Scarlett, Age 8)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep91-kenna-and-scarlett-age-8-arguments-with-a-friend

Ep. 155 - Friend is jealous and possessive (Miranda, Age 8)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep155-friend-is-jealous-and-possessive-miranda-age8

Ep. 59 - Get rid of toxic friends? (Jessie, Age 13)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep59-jessie-age-13 

Ep. 161 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Is there a kind way to reject someone? | Friendship advice for kids

FREE guide for parents: 12 ways to help your child make friends

https://drfriendtastic.com/gift/

Parents, check out my online workshops for kids at workshops.eileenkennedymoore.com.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?

SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

Like the podcast? Check out my books at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.

*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

- How do you decide whether to share your opinion or keep it to yourself?

- Have you ever been in a situation where someone wanted to be friends with you, but you weren’t interested in being friends with them? How did you handle it?

- Have you ever had someone reject your efforts to be friends with them or just not like you as much as you like them? How did they let you know? How do you wish they’d let you know? How did you respond?

- Dr. Friendtastic said, “Everyone has a right to be treated with kindness and respect.” What does that mean you should do with people who are not your friends?

*** You might also like these podcast episodes:

Ep. 141 - Can we be friends with anyone? (Michael, Age 9)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep141-can-we-be-friends-with-anyone-michael-age9

Ep. 129 - Kindest way to break up with a friend (Audrey, Age 9)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep129-kindest-way-to-break-up-with-a-friend-audrey-age-9

Ep. 12 - Get rid of toxic friends? (Jessie, Age 13)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep59-jessie-age-13

Re-release of Ep. 55 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Saying no can save a friendship | Friendship advice for kids

FREE guide for parents: 12 ways to help your child make friends

https://drfriendtastic.com/gift/

Parents, check out my online workshops for kids at workshops.eileenkennedymoore.com.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?

SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

Like the podcast? Check out my books at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.

*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

- Think of a time you had to say no to a friend. What happened? How hard or easy was it for you to say no? How did your friend react?

- Why is it important to say no to friends sometimes? How can saying no help a friendship? How can NOT saying no sometimes hurt a friendship?

- Why do you think kids are sometimes nervous or uncomfortable about saying no to a friend?

- What could you say if a friend is disappointed or annoyed when you say no?

- When is it okay to say yes to a friend, even if it’s not exactly what you want?

*** You might also like these podcast episodes:

Ep. 154 - Friends say she’s bossy, but they’re bossy (Lola, Age 8)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/friends-say-shes-bossy-but-theyre

Ep. 109 - What does it mean to be yourself? (Charlotte, Age 11)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep109-what-does-it-mean-to-be-true-to-self-charlotte-age11

Ep. 79 - Sending and receiving Stop Signals (Owen, Age 8)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep70-owen-age-8-stop-signals

Ep. 160- Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Recognizing stop signs | Friendship advice for kids

FREE guide for parents: 12 ways to help your child make friends

https://drfriendtastic.com/gift/

Parents, check out my online workshops for kids at workshops.eileenkennedymoore.com.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?

SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

Like the podcast? Check out my books at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.

*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

- What message does it send a friend if you ignore that friend’s stop sign?

- Why do kids sometimes have trouble responding to stop signs from their friends?

- Have you ever asked someone to stop and they didn’t listen? How did you feel? Why do you think they didn’t stop? How did you handle the situation?

- Why is it not okay for friends to punish each other? How is punishment different from a logical consequence? (Hint: A logical consequence is the natural result of an action. For instance, if you are mean to a friend, the logical consequence is that the friend won’t want to be around you. If you blab a friend’s secret, the logical consequence is that friend won’t trust you with another secret. )

*** You might also like these podcast episodes:

Ep. 43 - Friend cut her hair! (Beatrix, Age 8)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/beatrix-age-8-friend-cuts-her-hair

Ep. 41 - Friends won't listen to stop or no (Tessa, Age 9)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/tessa-age-9-boundaries

Ep. 3 - Kid tries to wreck game (Noelle, Age 10)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-episode-4b8

Ep. 159- Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: What to do when a friendship is fading | Friendship advice for kids

FREE guide for parents: 12 ways to help your child make friends

https://drfriendtastic.com/gift/

Parents, check out my online workshops for kids at workshops.eileenkennedymoore.com.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?

SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

Like the podcast? Check out my books at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.

*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

- What are some reasons why kids’ friendships sometimes fall apart?

- What would you do if you noticed a friend was suddenly acting more distant?

- Why do friends sometimes refuse to tell you what’s wrong when there’s a problem between you? (Hint: What might they be afraid of?)

- If a friend told you they were mad at you because of something you did, what could you do to make things better between you? What should you avoid doing in that situation?

- What do you think it means to show up as your best self? Why is that important?

*** You might also like these podcast episodes:

Ep. 151 - Why is it so hard to say, “I’m sorry”? (Minta, Age 10)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep151-why-is-it-so-hard-to-say-im-sorry-minta-age-almost-10

Ep. 77 - Friend is nicer to someone else (Maya, Age 8)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep77-maya-age-8-friend-is-nicer-to-someone-else

Ep. 73 - Best friend suddenly stops playing with him (J.J., Age 11)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep73-jj-age-11-best-friend-stops-playing-with-him

Ep. 158- Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Truth, falsehood, and different perspectives | Friendship advice for kids

FREE guide for parents: 12 ways to help your child make friends

https://drfriendtastic.com/gift/

Parents, check out my online workshops for kids at workshops.eileenkennedymoore.com.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?

SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

Like the podcast? Check out my books at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.

*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

- Students and teachers can have important and deeply caring relationships, but they can’t be friends. Why not?

- What is the lesson of the story about three blind men describing an elephant?

- How might understanding that different people can have different views about the same situation or event help you deal with a friendship rough spot?

- Why do players in a sport agree to go along with what the umpire decides, even if they don’t agree?

- Dr. Friendtastic said, “We can’t always win a game, but we can always win the fun.” How do you win the fun while playing with friends?

*** You might also like these podcast episodes:

Ep. 75: Upset when he loses a game (Alex, Age 10)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep75-alex-age-a10-upset-when-he-loses-a-game

Ep. 140 - Friend lies and boasts (Martha, Age 9)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep140-friend-lies-and-boasts-martha-age-9

Ep. 20 - Lying friend (Anna, Age 9)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-20-anna

Ep. 157- Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Staying connected when you're not together | Friendship advice for kids

FREE guide for parents: 12 ways to help your child make friends

https://drfriendtastic.com/gift/

Parents, check out my online workshops for kids at workshops.eileenkennedymoore.com.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?

SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

Like the podcast? Check out my books at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.

*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

- Have you ever had a friend in a different classroom? What did you do to try to stay connected? Why is it sometimes hard for friends in different classrooms to stay close?

- What are some things you do or would like to do with friends outside of school?

- Why is it important to ask friends about what’s happening in their lives when you’re not around and tell them about what’s happening in your life when they’re not around? What’s the difference between being nosy and being an interested friend?

- What do you think Dr. Friendtastic means when she suggests that Lily try to open-hearted? (Hint: She mentions Lily making other friends, and Lily’s friend making other friends.)

*** You might also like these podcast episodes:

Ep. 110 - Being apart from a friend (Matilda, Age 5)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep110-being-apart-from-a-friend-matilda-age5

Ep 120 - Best friend is playing with someone else (Metis, Age 6)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep120-best-friend-playing-with-someone-else-metis-6-dutch

Ep. 136. How long should you keep a friend (Matthew, Age 7)

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/how-long-should-you-keep-a-friend

Ep. 156- Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Having another friend isn't a betrayal | Friendship advice for kids

FREE guide for parents: 12 ways to help your child make friends

https://drfriendtastic.com/gift/

Parents, check out my online workshops for kids at workshops.eileenkennedymoore.com.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?

SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

Like the podcast? Check out my books at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.

*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

- If you’re having a conflict with someone, do you think your friend has to be on your side, against the other kid? Why or why not? Why might your friend not want to take sides?

- Have you ever been in a situation where another kid didn’t like you? Why didn’t they like you? How did you feel about them? How did things end up between you?

- Dr. Friendtastic lists a bunch of things that could make the situation worse: Criticizing the friend’s other friend, acting grumpy around the friend, or insisting that the friend has to choose sides. Why are these NOT good options? (Hint: How is the friend likely to react?)

- Why does Dr. Friendtastic encourage Ian to try to imagine the other kids’ feelings? (Hint: How might that be helpful for Ian?) Why does she focus on what Ian could do, rather than what the friend should do?

*** You might also like these podcast episodes:

Ep. 117 - How to tell if a friend is loyal (Julian, Age 12) 

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/how-to-tell-if-a-friend-is-loyal  

Ep. 84 - Torn between two friends who don’t like each other (Jennifer, Age 10) 

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep84-jennifer-age-10-torn-between-two-friends-who-dont-like-each-other 

Ep. 77 - Friend is nicer to someone else (Maya, Age 8) 

https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep77-maya-age-8-friend-is-nicer-to-someone-else