Let's Dig into That

Why is it so hard to talk about money, the taboo topic that can often make or break a relationship? Combining finances…sign of "healthy love" or a suicide mission?

No matter your financial personality (the frugal saver who fell for the generous shopaholic), it’s best to get the conversation started – sooner rather than later – because one thing is for sure: cash will come up. Join J.T. (the financial free spirit) and Jordan (the stat tutor) as they weigh in, discussing triumphs and tragedies in their own fiscal history. J.T. shares advice on why checking your ego at the door is critical and the importance of celebrating “little wins.” Jordan advocates for regular financial “dates” to ensure partners are on the same page and working toward shared goals. Learn why transparency tends to be the best option and how joint goal-setting can empower a partnership.

Jordan views jealousy in a partner as a threat to her independence, “possessive, controlling, and a total buzz kill.” J.T. sees his jealousy as “healthy,” a protective response to some combination of anger, anxiety, fear, and insecurity.

In this episode, discover:

- Distinction between jealousy and envy

- How Jordan and J.T. used compassion to set boundaries, allowing for a shift in mindset

- Signs of a jealous partner

- Jealousy and Fear: fear of a relationship ending or of not being good enough

- Get a taste of the couple’s deep respect and admiration for Dr. Brené Brown. If you want "to access a universe of new choices and second chances," do yourself a favor and find a copy of her book, Atlas of the Heart.

Growing up, it was never a question of if - but how many. Children were the guarantee that came with the partner and picket fence. It was the assumption – and so they tried.

Why did J.T. and Jordan attempt to procreate with others and ultimately decide to live child-free together? In this episode:

- J.T. discusses his journey from painting a nursery to a premature, medically advised vasectomy at age 34, how he reframed fatherhood, and his capacity to nurture.

- After surgery on her “cuterus” and years without a single pregnancy, Jordan recreationally attended adoption meetings and credited the universe for the resolution not to freeze her eggs.

- Discover how Jordan and J.T. attempt to impact the next generation and the outreach they find most rewarding.

“Kindness is seeing the best in others when they cannot see it in themselves.”

November is KINDNESS month. Jordan and J.T. explore what it means to be kind to yourself and its impact on the greater good.

- Jordan describes her intentional efforts to be kind as a practice of anticipating needs.

- J.T.’s habit of starting his workday with an awareness pause and his belief that small gestures can positively impact global goodwill.

- The kindness inherent in “getting involved in the community” has positive biological effects on well-being and happiness.

- Is kindness as critical to our health as sleep and exercise?

- Punchline: Please don’t be a dick.

Self-deception is how many of us get through the day: “I’ll start my diet tomorrow,” or the flattering angles reflected in a “skinny mirror.” What about the lies we tell to protect our image - the lies that could snowball into an identity we don’t recognize?

Jordan (the compulsive exaggerator/plan canceller) and J.T. (the shapeshifter) share the biggest lie they told themselves. In this episode, discover:

- Why we might not feel empowered to tell the truth.

- When “fake it until you make it” became bad advice.

- Can giving pieces of our truth away start us down a path of inauthenticity?

- So, I’m a liar. What now? Tips on accountability and compassion.

- J.T. shares his envy surrounding complex female friendships and his confusion about why he cannot participate using the same language.

- Jordan discusses how she stays connected with her close circle and offers tools for J.T. to cultivate a stronger support system.

- Do friendships with the opposite sex require different boundaries?

“My body is a reflection of my mindset. I sense collusion.” – Jordan, Cellulite Owner

Past, present, and…hopeful. Whether we see ourselves accurately or in the fun house mirror of self-shame, body image hits the Let’s Dig into That sweet spot – it’s a topic nobody really wants to discuss. Join us as J.T. divulges his calorie-restrictive career in athletics and how his self-image was not found in the mirror but in the eyes of any woman who glanced in his direction. Jordan offers a gentler path of living in your own skin after actively participating in the requisite self-disgust of being a woman for more than two decades. Everyone’s got their own shit…let us rejoice and not recoil.

“Hope and fear cannot occupy the same space. Invite one to stay.” – Maya Angelou, American Poet, Memoirist, and Civil Rights Activist

While fear is essential and universal, it can also be torture. Jordan and J.T. share personal milestone moments impacted by fear, discuss the relationship between fear and alcohol as two recovering people-pleasers, and share ideas on how to combat the fear-based standstill.

“…for women, 40 is the golden age – to get divorced.” - Ali Wong, American Comedian and Actor

Jordan and J.T. open up about Sex After Divorce. Her ten-year relationship led to a rebellious rebound, while J.T.’s intimacy trauma caused quasi-intentional celibacy. Get to know the curious couple as they explore coitus post-breakup:

- Self-esteem: I've still got it! Or do I?

- Authenticity on the rebound

- Intimacy vs. sexuality

- The sexy effect of your personal values