Letting Go of Guilt by Resolving to Do Better in Future | Ajahn Dhammasiha | Dhamma Talk at Dhammagiri

Many struggle with feelings of guilt. Some even berate themselves, self-criticize, and continue to beat themselves down until they loose all self esteem and start hating themselves due to unskilfull, harmful actions they have done.

But that serves no benefit to anyone:

It doesnt help the person we may have harmed

It's bad for ourselves

It's of no use to anyone at all.

Ajahn Dhammasiha explains what the Buddha advised us to do if we have committed harm:

First, we have to recognize if we have acted unskilfully, fully understand and honestly acknowlege it (suppression/denial doesn't work!)

Second, if possible, we try to fix any damage and ask for forgiveness

Third, we firmly resolve to do better in future

Fourth, now we can completely forgive ourselves and let go

Fifth, we maintain our resolution and restrain ourselves, not to do the unskilful action ever again

Guilt is all about the past. Instead of wallowing in guilt, we focus all our energy on doing better in the future. That's what's really benefical for both ourselves and all other beings!

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