Listen To Sassy: Life In The 90s

From our current place in world history, we know that Dirt -- the Sassy offshoot targeted at Sassy readers' boyfriends, brothers, and friends from the skate park -- had a brief but interesting run. But in September 1991, Dirt was just a dream that required a preview issue as proof of concept, and it came to Sassy readers along with that month's issue of its parent magazine. Is it obvious that this publication is going anywhere? Find out as we walk you all the way through the whole damn thing, from instructions on how to shower to instructions on how to construct a zip gun!

QUICK LINKS
🗒 Full episode notes can be found on this episode's page on our website
🖼️ Check out this episode's Visual Aids
☎️ Call The Hotline! Leave your questions, comments and Sassy stories on the hotline at 720-SASSY-GO or record directly on our site
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TOPICS
🎧 It Is September 1991
🎧 What Gives?
🎧 Junk Drawer
🎧 Feature: Hard Knowledge: A Gangster’s Story
🎧 Name: Ian MacKaye & Jeff Stanton
🎧 Fiction: Rain, Trains, & Pain
🎧 Fashion Feature: Low Maintenance
🎧 “Hey Baby, What’s Your Sign?”
🎧 A View From The Crowd
🎧 Grooming
🎧 Dirt Ads
🎧 Goodball For Now

NOTES
🎶 Dischord Records
📏 "Ian Mackaye on Straight-Edge movement..." on Reddit
🏍️ Jeff Stanton Adventures
🍎 Sidral Mundet
🍔 "Can Working In Fast Food Cause Acne? (With 5 Skin Care Tips)" at Shoes For Crews
👟 "Nike Air Mowabb Returns In Historic Fashion, So Why Aren't Sneakerheads Happy?" at Man Of Many
😼 Josh Gosfield's website
🗽 Gosfield's "Censorship Is Unamerican" painting

The staff of Sassy is probably hoping you already finished your back-to-school shopping, because this month's fashion editorials are not their most inspired. You can wear French-y stripes or bone and beige shades straight out of the Spiegel catalogue, or possibly destroy a skirt to make yourself some fringe. If you're feeling bold, you can sneak into a tattoo studio or piercing pagoda. But maybe your style icon is alleged high school cheerleader Icy Blu, whose début album is advertised in this issue? We've got questions about desert boots, cellulite treatments, "Sammies," and so much more: put down your copy of The Vampire Diaries BOOK and listen!

QUICK LINKS
🗒 Full episode notes can be found on this episode's page on our website
🖼️ Check out this episode's Visual Aids
☎️ Call The Hotline! Leave your questions, comments and Sassy stories on the hotline at 720-SASSY-GO or record directly on our site
🦋 @ListenToSassy on Bluesky
📷 @ListenToSassy on Instagram
🧑‍💻 Visit our website ListenToSassy.com
🛍️ Shop the LTS Store

JOIN THE LTS CLUB AND GET THE GOODIES
📖 Full cover-to-cover magazine PDFs
💬 Chat with us and your fellow listeners on Discord
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🤩 Join the Listen To Sassy Club today!
💖 Already a club member? Check out the Pinned Patreon Primer Post.

TOPICS
🎧 It Is September 1991
🎧 Fashion Feature: Vous Êtes Vraiment Une Artiste
🎧 Fashion Feature: Relax Already
🎧 What Next: Cool School Shoes
🎧 Making It: Fringy
🎧 About Face
🎧 Zits And Stuff
🎧 We Try It: Smooth, Soft, Very Clean Skin
🎧 Sassy Ads
🎧 Diary: 12:00 PM EST / 9:00 AM PST
🎧 Goodbye For Now

NOTES
💃 "DIY: How To Make A Fringe Skirt - Cute, Fun & No Sewing Required!" at Fiskars
🫟 The Conscious Ink Subscription
🥪 "The Retinol Sandwich Method: A Gentler Way To Use Retinoids" at Westlake Dermatology
⬜️ Clarins Multi-Mass on Mercari
🥶 Icy Blu on Wikipedia
🫠 "Icy Blu's Disappearance" at @untoldstoriesweb on TikTok
🌄 "Twin Peaks Collectible CardArt By Star Pics - Julee Cruise" on Twin Peaks Blog
📺 "'The Rockford Files' Remains One Of Television's Greatest Hangs" at Defector

The pop culture Sassy covers in the September issue includes some venerable names: Prince, Duran Duran, Violent Femmes. But there are some thrilling new ones, too. All the women who work in the music industry that Christina profiles, getting readers hyped about how to get jobs like theirs. Reese Witherspoon, a mere 14 years old in her breakout movie, The Man In The Moon! All the Commitments from The Commitments! And, probably most importantly, a show whose fortunes Sassy will continue to track until it, amazingly, outlives the magazine: Beverly Hills, 90210. Sure, you've seen their pinup pages in Teen Beat and Bop, but you've never seen them like this: in their underwear, just waiting for you to cut them out along with their clothes and put their paper dolls in situations Darren Star never dreamed of. Fact-checking Christina's blurbs is but one of the many orders of business in our latest episode -- listen!

QUICK LINKS
🗒 Full episode notes can be found on this episode's page on our website
🖼️ Check out this episode's Visual Aids
☎️ Call The Hotline! Leave your questions, comments and Sassy stories on the hotline at 720-SASSY-GO or record directly on our site
🦋 @ListenToSassy on Bluesky
📷 @ListenToSassy on Instagram
🧑‍💻 Visit our website ListenToSassy.com
🛍️ Shop the LTS Store

JOIN THE LTS CLUB AND GET THE GOODIES
📖 Full cover-to-cover magazine PDFs
💬 Chat with us and your fellow listeners on Discord
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🤩 Join the Listen To Sassy Club today!
💖 Already a club member? Check out the Pinned Patreon Primer Post.

TOPICS
🎧 It Is September 1991
🎧 What Now
🎧 Watch It
🎧 Listen Up
🎧 One To Watch
🎧 Feature: Beverly Hills, 90210 Indecently Exposed
🎧 Feature: How To Have A Job In Music And Be Female
🎧 Goodbye For Now

NOTES
🎓 "Valedictorian Legal Battle Continues" at UPI
🐴 "Sinéad O'Connor Tribute - Jessie Buckley & The RTÉ Concert Orchestra | Troy Live - Culture Night"
🗽 Violent Femmes' "American Music" video on YouTube
👖 Samantha Fox's "(Hurt Me! Hurt Me!) But The Pants Stay On" video on YouTube
🎨 Judy Francis on Illustrators Online
🕷️ The Torture And The Desert Spiders website
📑 Janet Billig Rich on Wikipedia
🏆 "Judy Mareiniss - SAMMY's Hall Of Fame Induction" on YouTube
🧑‍🎓 Students Engaged

Tara needs to thank the scissor-happy Sassy reader who sold her the podcast's original copy of the September 1991 issue, because if not for the missing pages (full and partial), we would never have had to acquire another copy of the same issue and find out there were TWO VERSIONS of the cover -- one lipsticked and glossy, one nude-lipped and matte! Stand by as Pam uses her angles to try to get the inside story. While you wait, we can tell you about the issue's Teen Life topics. Karen does a shoddy job trying to make us take up for the beleaguered American farmer. Kim tries to make us chill out about the popular kids. Boys are crying and REALLY defensive about it. And much more! Get into it!

QUICK LINKS
🗒 Full episode notes can be found on this episode's page on our website
🖼️ Check out this episode's Visual Aids
☎️ Call The Hotline! Leave your questions, comments and Sassy stories on the hotline at 720-SASSY-GO or record directly on our site
🦋 @ListenToSassy on Bluesky
📷 @ListenToSassy on Instagram
🧑‍💻 Visit our website ListenToSassy.com
🛍️ Shop the LTS Store

JOIN THE LTS CLUB AND GET THE GOODIES
📖 Full cover-to-cover magazine PDFs
💬 Chat with us and your fellow listeners on Discord
🐣 Get episodes earlier than the general public
🚫 Ad free episodes with chapter markers
🤩 Join the Listen To Sassy Club today!
💖 Already a club member? Check out the Pinned Patreon Primer Post.

TOPICS
🎧 It Is September 1991
🎧 Feature: Why You Should Lose Sleep Over Farming
🎧 Feature: Popular People Are As Insecure As You (And Other Reasons Fabulosity Is Vastly Overrated)
🎧 Body Talk
🎧 What He Said: Do You Ever Cry?
🎧 Help
🎧 Stuff You Wrote
🎧 Goodbye For Now
🎧 Who Else Was Big Here?

NOTES
🥔 "Potato Vitamin C: Truth, Loss Rates & Smart Cooking Tips" at Alibaba
🧫 "Story Of Discovery: Hepatitis C: From Non-A, Non-B Hepatitis To A Cure" at the National Institute Of Diabetes And Digestive And Kidney Diseases
🐞 Coccinellidae on Wikipedia
❄️ "Why No Two Snowflakes Look Alike" at Montana Public Radio
🍑 Catherine Matzig receiving a check from BUTTCON on Instagram
🛩️ Tara's Love Story recaps at Decider

How health-conscious are we, according to Sassy's August 1991 quiz? Quite, as long as you have no follow-up questions! After sharing our results (and complaints) about that, it's on to your calls on subjects including (but not limited to) Nad's, dry brushing, Little House On The Prairie, Hypercolor t-shirts, Gantt charts, Kevin Coogan -- and, of course, Christmas piles, because 'tis always the season. Grab some vegetables or some weed (or both!) and snuggle into your sleeping bag with us.

QUICK LINKS
🗒 Full episode notes can be found on this episode's page on our website
🖼️ Check out this episode's Visual Aids
☎️ Call The Hotline! Leave your questions, comments and Sassy stories on the hotline at 720-SASSY-GO or record directly on our site
🦋 @ListenToSassy on Bluesky
📷 @ListenToSassy on Instagram
🧑‍💻 Visit our website ListenToSassy.com
🛍️ Shop the LTS Store

JOIN THE LTS CLUB AND GET THE GOODIES
📖 Full cover-to-cover magazine PDFs
💬 Chat with us and your fellow listeners on Discord
🐣 Get episodes earlier than the general public
🚫 Ad free episodes with chapter markers
🤩 Join the Listen To Sassy Club today!
💖 Already a club member? Check out the Pinned Patreon Primer Post.

TOPICS
🎧 It Is August 1991
🎧 Quiz: How Health Conscious Are You
🎧 From The Hotline
🎧 Goodbye For Now
🎧 No One Asked Pam

NOTES
🚬 "The Science Is Clear: Marijuana Is Safer Than Tobacco" at Daily Montanan
🪦 "Cannabis And Tobacco Smoke Are Not Equally Carcinogenic" at Harm Reduction Journal (via the National Institute Of Health National Library Of Medicine)
🫓 "Ask The Dietitian: Fat Intake Range For Teens Is Flexible" at MLive
🩹 Get Welly
☁️ Cloud Dancer
⛈️ "'Cloud Dancer': A Measured Response" at John Paul Brammer's newsletter
🖍️ Gallagher's "Gross Girls Coloring Book"
⚖️ Gallagher's "Justice For Rizzo" print

We know this issue landed in mid- to late July, but can it ever be too early to start thinking about your back-to-school wardrobe? Sassy invites you to imagine yourself as a Coco Chanel knockoff, an intimidatingly cool biker chick, or a face and a couple of limbs with monochromatic garments laid on top of you. (It'll make sense when you see it.) You can also learn about eye makeup, hair brushes, kilts, and what kind of time Jane had co-starring in R.E.M.'s "Shiny Happy People" video...but wouldn't you rather talk about all the new ADS that helped make this issue the fattest we've seen in months? We sure would! Get out two to four pairs of jeans and listen to our latest episode!

QUICK LINKS
🗒 Full episode notes can be found on this episode's page on our website
🖼️ Check out this episode's Visual Aids
☎️ Call The Hotline! Leave your questions, comments and Sassy stories on the hotline at 720-SASSY-GO or record directly on our site
🦋 @ListenToSassy on Bluesky
📷 @ListenToSassy on Instagram
🧑‍💻 Visit our website ListenToSassy.com
🛍️ Shop the LTS Store

JOIN THE LTS CLUB AND GET THE GOODIES
📖 Full cover-to-cover magazine PDFs
💬 Chat with us and your fellow listeners on Discord
🐣 Get episodes earlier than the general public
🚫 Ad free episodes with chapter markers
🤩 Join the Listen To Sassy Club today!
💖 Already a club member? Check out the Pinned Patreon Primer Post.

TOPICS
🎧 It Is August 1991
🎧 Fashion Feature: Sassy’s Very Most Perfect Back To School Clothes Are Art, You Know
🎧 Fashion Feature: Hit The Road, Jack
🎧 Fashion Feature: Coco A-Go-Go
🎧 What Next: Pick A Kilt, Any Kilt
🎧 Beauty Feature: The Eye Makeup Encyclopedia
🎧 About Face
🎧 Sassy Ads
🎧 Diary: Your List Of Random Facts About The R.E.M. Shiny Happy People Video
🎧 Inside Out: C
🎧 Goodbye For Now

NOTES
📸 Susan Schacter's website
🦎 Chris Mazza with lizard eyes
👅 "Why We Stick Our Tongue Out When We Concentrate" at Psychology Today
🏫 Penns Manor Area Junior/Senior High School
🍆 Men Only Want Sex And Their Freedom by Nannette LaRee Hernandez at Kobo
💦 Creative Screwing: A Woman's Guide to Becoming An Erotic Enchantress Of Superlustful Sex by Hernandez at Amazon
🖼️ Hernandez's official author photo on Amazon
😤 Hernandez's antifeminist screed at Writers Cafe
📸 Hernandez on Instagram
💄 Clarion commercial on YouTube
😀 R.E.M.'s "Shiny Happy People" video on YouTube
👗 Donna wearing the black daisy dress (with matching headband) on Beverly Hills, 90210
🎥 Katherine Dieckmann on Wikipedia
🔥 Extra Hot Great 602 (on Love Story)
✍️ Tara's author page at Decider

The August 1991 issue has a few pop culture topics to go deep on. Guns 'N Roses gets covered with a What Now concert review AND a review of Danny Sugerman's very pretentious-sounding book about them in the brand-new column Read It (though probably don't; it only earns one pip as the month's book bomb). Paula Abdul gets a bomb review of her new album Spellbound AND name-checked as "Paula Abdrool" in the Keanu Reeves/Alex Winter cover Q&A. Otherwise, we get a lot of material we might like more coverage on, like: Siouxsie And The Banshees' Superstition; Ethan Hawke's Mystery Date hair; Tori Spelling's 18th birthday party; and what Anne L. could not have foreseen would be an incredible revolving door of BulletBoys. You don't need an extra arm à la The Dark Backward to enjoy our commentary on all of the above and more!

QUICK LINKS
🗒 Full episode notes can be found on this episode's page on our website
🖼️ Check out this episode's Visual Aids
☎️ Call The Hotline! Leave your questions, comments and Sassy stories on the hotline at 720-SASSY-GO or record directly on our site
🦋 @ListenToSassy on Bluesky
📷 @ListenToSassy on Instagram
🧑‍💻 Visit our website ListenToSassy.com
🛍️ Shop the LTS Store

JOIN THE LTS CLUB AND GET THE GOODIES
📖 Full cover-to-cover magazine PDFs
💬 Chat with us and your fellow listeners on Discord
🐣 Get episodes earlier than the general public
🚫 Ad free episodes with chapter markers
🤩 Join the Listen To Sassy Club today!
💖 Already a club member? Check out the Pinned Patreon Primer Post.

TOPICS
🎧 It Is August 1991
🎧 What Now
🎧 Read It
🎧 Watch It
🎧 Listen Up
🎧 Ones To Watch
🎧 Feature: The Bogus Interview: A Play In One Act
🎧 Goodbye For Now
🎧 And I'm Tara...

NOTES
🎂 Tori Spelling and her "Absolut Birthday" cake
🎉 More photos from Tori Spelling's 18th birthday at The Daily Mail
🌶️ Absolut Pepper magazine ad
🐴 Horace Mann School's website
🌊 "Andrew Trees: Case Of Terminated Horace Mann Teacher Still Causing Waves" at HNN
👹 "Prep-School Predators" in The New York Times Magazine
🏫 "The Master" at The New Yorker
🤷‍♂️ "Horace Mann Apologizes For Abuse But Won't Start New Inquiry" at The New York Times
🎓 "Horace Mann School Admissions Scandal" at Ivy Coach
💵 "Elite NYC Prep School Horace Mann Accused Of Letting Tech Honcho Buy Kids' Admission For #1M: Lawsuit" at the New York Post
🔬 Gina Rodriguez's "mama lets research" tweet on Twitter
📖 The Big Takeover magazine
🛹 Blind Skateboards Video Days on YouTube
🗡️ Gladiator (1992) on The Roku Channel
🎸 Metal-Rules's review of Danny Sugerman's Appetite For Destruction
👩‍❤️‍👨 Mystery Date on Hoopla
⏪ The Dark Backward on YouTube
⭐️ Brenda Starr on The Roku Channel
🏃‍♀️ Paula Abdul's "Rush Rush" video on YouTube
🥁 BulletBoys on Wikipedia
🎙️ "BulletBoys' Marq Torien And Mick Sweda Discuss Original Lineup Reunion And More" on YouTube
📺 "The Idiot Box, Episode 1" on YouTube
📺 "The Idiot Box, Episode 2" on YouTube
⏳ "Waiting For Godot Review - Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter's Unlikely Reunion" at The Guardian
🔥 Extra Hot Great 601

August 1991 is the thickest issue we've had in quite a while, but those extra pages were not set aside for Teen Life topics -- in fact, there isn't even a fiction story! There are, however, Kim's try-out for American Gladiators, Christina's musings on long-distance boyfriend pros and cons, a What He Said on breast size, a quick trip over a bridge (or through a tunnel) to Brooklyn for On The Road, and more. Even the bummer feature -- about polygamist Alex Joseph, his nine wives, and their many many children -- is mostly a curiosity in its day, and only a bummer in retrospect. Not a bummer? Our latest episode, featuring original music cues that WILL get stuck in your heads. Or maybe not. Enjoy!

QUICK LINKS
🗒 Full episode notes can be found on this episode's page on our website
🖼️ Check out this episode's Visual Aids
☎️ Call The Hotline! Leave your questions, comments and Sassy stories on the hotline at 720-SASSY-GO or record directly on our site
🦋 @ListenToSassy on Bluesky
📷 @ListenToSassy on Instagram
🧑‍💻 Visit our website ListenToSassy.com
🛍️ Shop the LTS Store

JOIN THE LTS CLUB AND GET THE GOODIES
📖 Full cover-to-cover magazine PDFs
💬 Chat with us and your fellow listeners on Discord
🐣 Get episodes earlier than the general public
🚫 Ad free episodes with chapter markers
🤩 Join the Listen To Sassy Club today!
💖 Already a club member? Check out the Pinned Patreon Primer Post.

TOPICS
🎧 Feature: I, Gladiatrix
🎧 Feature: Chronic Long-Distance Boyfriend Distress
🎧 Feature: This Cat Has Nine Wives
🎧 Feature: 9 Things About America That Make Us Want To Scream And Throw Stuff
🎧 Body Talk
🎧 What He Said: Does Breast Size Matter?
🎧 It Happened To Me: “Fighting Homelessness”
🎧 On The Road: Brooklyn, NY
🎧 Stuff You Wrote
🎧 Goodbye For Now

NOTES
🤺 "Mike 'The Miz' Mizanin To Host American Gladiators Reboot" at Gladiators TV
🧊 Former American Gladiators star Ice on Instagram
💍 Alex Joseph on Wikipedia
👰🏻‍♀️ "Plural Marriage Was 'Best Offer' Of My Life" by Bo Joseph at The Spectrum
🌞 "Can You Get Sunburnt Or UV Skin Damage Through Car Or Home Windows?" at University Of Wollongong Australia
🥥 "Jesse 'Shake It Like A White Girl' Jaymes - College Girls" on YouTube
💰 Jesse Itzler on Wikipedia
⁉️ "Uber Driver Sucked Me Off?!" on Know Your Meme
🏚️ National Student Campaign Against Hunger And Homelessness
🍕 Fascati Pizza on Yelp
🌿 The Brooklyn Botanic Garden
📸 "1992 Press Photo Slidell Factory Store Essay Winner Megan Watson In Louisiana" on eBay
👊 "Double Fisting Two King & Queen Motorcycle Seats | Custom Seat Work At Atomic Cycle Works" on YouTube
🌴 Again With This on Patreon
✊ National Day Labor Organizing Network

We're just back from a nearly two-month break. We took two VERY confrontational quizzes ("Are You A News Moron?" and "Are You An Annoyance?"). We...barely remember how to do this, so please enjoy a basically unedited stream of thought conversation on wedgies, Margaret Thatcher, Antarctica, huffing in an unventilated garage, and much much more!

QUICK LINKS
🗒 Full episode notes can be found on this episode's page on our website
☎️ Call The Hotline! Leave your questions, comments and Sassy stories on the hotline at 720-SASSY-GO or record directly on our site
🦋 @ListenToSassy on Bluesky
📷 @ListenToSassy on Instagram
🧑‍💻 Visit our website ListenToSassy.com
🛍️ Shop the LTS Store

JOIN THE LTS CLUB AND GET THE GOODIES
📖 Full cover-to-cover magazine PDFs
💬 Chat with us and your fellow listeners on Discord
🐣 Get episodes earlier than the general public
🚫 Ad free episodes with chapter markers
🤩 Join the Listen To Sassy Club today!
💖 Already a club member? Check out the Pinned Patreon Primer Post.

TOPICS
🎧 It Is July 1991
🎧 Quiz: Are You A News Moron
🎧 Quiz: Are You An Annoyance?
🎧 From The Hotline
🎧 Goodbye For Now

NOTES
🕵🏻‍♂️ The Deliberate Stranger DVDs on eBay
👔 Tara's piece on Justin Theroux, Corporate Villain at GQ