Living Connected - NVC

The New Year is like a death and a birth in the sense that we are ending a year and starting a new one. We will never see 2021 again that we know of and that can be something to mourn especially if things have happened in that year or find the things that were a gift in the ending year and honor those too. We can shift or reframe how we see the birth of this New Year and what gifts this year may bring. What intentions can we set for 2022. 

Eric and I wanted to shift the idea of New Year’s Resolution to a do-able request of ourselves. We thought about how maybe a resolution had more demand energy than a doable request. We talk about our intentions for the New Year and how we can have doable requests with those intentions. What does our next year in 2022 look like and feel like? Where does this sit in our body when we think about 2022. 

Let us invite ourselves to not have expectations or demands on the gift or intentions we set. A doable request can be something very small and can change if needed. If it helps ask a trusted friend to be a celebration buddy or a buddy who can hold you accountable in a kind and warm way I would suggest reaching out to someone and seeing if they would be willing. Even if it’s for just a little while like a week or a month. 

Please write in and email us what your intentions are for the year and we can read them on the podcast. It would be great fun to hear what your intentions are and what needs/feelings you have with those intentions for 2022. 

Resources:

Podcast: Dr. Alexandra Solomon – Reimagining LOVE

Episode #7 (Re) Gathering for the Holidays

Books

David Richo – Triggers

Terry Reel -  https://terryreal.com/

Request for support from my listeners:

I need to buy a Dynamic XLR Microphone so I can have better sound quality. This can get expensive especially when mics can cost between $200 – 500$ each.  I would love your support in donating 1-10$ to my Living connected Paypal account. A little goes a long way and I truly from the bottom of my heart would appreciate it. I will also give you a huge shout out on my podcast to those who have donated. If you would prefer to be anonymous that is okay too. Let me know in the notes if you would prefer not to have a shout out of gratitude.
Donations to Paypal email: [email protected]

CONTACT INFORMATION:

 Email: [email protected]

Instagram: livingconnectednvc

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/LivingConnectedNVC/

Website: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1153175
 
Music is brought to you by: https://www

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This episode had more static and I have looked it up and it could be a cord issue which is crazy to me that a year and half cord would be causing so much trouble. I sincerely apologize for the poor audio quality.

In this episode we talk about the holidays and how it can be hard to figure out family stuff around the holidays. We go into a little about change and growth and what that might look like in our families.

Dr. Yvette Erasmus is a psychologist, teacher, and consultant who specializes in the transformation of domination systems, human healing and growth, and supporting people to be the most loving and connected versions of themselves. Her approach synthesizes mind-body medicine, self- development tools for self-healing and authentic relating, somatic experiencing, diversity and inclusiveness, nonviolent communication, and, bringing what has been divided and fragmented into wholeness and harmony to create more life affirming healthy and interdependent living.

Dr. Yvette Erasmus Resources:

Website: https://www.yvetteerasmus.com/ 

YouTube Channel:
https://www.youtube.com/c/YvetteErasmusPsyD

Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/yvette.erasmus/

Instagram: @dryvetteerasmus

Wednesday Practice Group:
1 hour 30 minutes • Free

A Q&A Learning Call with Yvette
Every Wednesday 10:00-11:30am CT via Zoom
Register here:
https://programs.yvetteerasmus.com/conversations-from-the-heart-online/

Patreon:
https://www.patreon.com/yvetteerasmus

Core Offerings and Free Programs:
https://programs.yvetteerasmus.com/offerings/#core-offerings

1. Relationship as a spiritual practice

2. Boundaries course

3. Parenting course

4. Foundational program human 101

Other Resources:

Spiral dynamics – Don Beck and Clare Graves

https://spiraldynamicsintegral.nl/en/origin/

Request for support from my listeners:

I am going to be moving back to Bend, OR and I would love to set up a small studio in my apartment so Kyle and I don’t have to use zoom. In order to do that I would need to buy two Dynamic XLR Microphones so we can sit at the same table together, as well as a mic stand and the XLR cords to go with. This can get expensive especially when mics can cost between $200 – 500$ each. This will help me save time and not have to spend on average 8hrs of editing on each episode. Since I haven’t been working because of COVID, I would love your support in donating 1-10$ to my Living connected Paypal account. A little goes a long way and I truly from the bottom of my heart would appreciate it. I will also give you a huge shout out on my podcast to those who have donated. If you would prefer to be anonymous that is okay too. Let me know in the notes if you would prefer not to have a shout out of gratitude. 

Donations to Paypal email: [email protected]

CONTACT INFORMATION:

 Email: [email protected]

Instagram: livingconnectednvc

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/LivingConnectedNVC/

Website: https://www.

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Michael Shawe started out in research psychology studying the origins of childhood depression which is a risk factor for depressive episodes in adults. When he was deciding on what path to choose, his advisor at the time who strongly encouraged him to be a researcher, died suddenly. Michael took time to reflect and decided on going on a more clinical path. From there he was invested in understanding people, but also aware of the impact of culture on our psychological development. He thought that might be in journalism, but the  field seemed bleak and he always enjoyed talking to people and getting to know them in the  interview process. Michael decided to take his awareness of the micro world and dedicate himself to guiding people into a deeper awareness of themselves. However, that was a long ways away from what actually occurred. He spent 7 years working with people with serious and persistent mental illness and chemical addiction from varying ages in non profits. At some point, Michael realized his interventions, while unconventional, were highly effective with his clients, but often he ran into obstacles with his superiors who found his methods untraditional.

Michael's Resources:

mikeshawetherapy.com

Instragram: thedaoofmike

Michaels Zocdoc website



Resources:

Wire Sculpture
https://www.thisiscolossal.com/2015/09/milov-wireframe-sculpture/

Different Approaches:

Gestalt:

https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-gestalt-psychology-2795808

Internal Family Systems:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapy-types/internal-family-systems-therapy

 Sensorimotor:

https://sensorimotorpsychotherapy.org/

Request for support from my listeners:

I am going to be moving back to Bend, OR and I would love to set up a small studio in my apartment so Kyle and I don’t have to use zoom. In order to do that I would need to buy two Dynamic XLR Microphones so we can sit at the same table together, as well as a mic stand and the XLR cords to go with. This can get expensive especially when mics can cost between $200 – 500$ each. This will help me save time and not have to spend on average 8hrs of editing on each episode. Since I haven’t been working because of COVID, I would love your support in donating 1-10$ to my Living connected Paypal account. A little goes a long way and I truly from the bottom of my heart would appreciate it. I will also give you a huge shout out on my podcast to those who have donated. If you would prefer to be anonymous that is okay too. Let me know in the notes if you would prefer not to have a shout out of gratitude.  

Donations to Paypal email: [email protected]

CONTACT INFORMATION:

 Email: [email protected]

Instagram: livingconnectednvc

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/LivingConnectedNVC/

Website: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1153175
 
Music is brought to you by: https://www.purple-planet.com/

Support the show

There was some popping in this episode. This mic created some weird static and I am so sorry, I have no idea why it did that. There are parts where its really bad. I think the coming episodes it isn’t so bad or at all there. I am having a hard time finding time to edit when working full time so here we go, bare with me. I am putting episodes out the best I can. Thank you so much for your patience and care.

Lelia Schott is the founder of Synergy Parenting, helping parents and children to reclaim inner peace and power. She has researched and practiced parenting for 24 years. She began writing and sharing her work around 9 years ago. Lelia specializes in therapeutic parent coaching and inner child healing. Her home is Cape Town, South Africa. Mother to four sons and two daughters. (Three of her sons are grown.) Lelia loves virtual coaching with people from all over the world.

Lelia's Resources:

Facebook.com/synergygentleparenting

Website:
www.leliaschott.com

Email: [email protected]


Resources:

1. L.R. Knost:

http://www.littleheartsbooks.com/about-the-authorillustrator/

2. Ram Dass:

https://www.ramdass.org/walking-each-other-home/

Quote: “We're all just walking each other home.” ~Ram Dass

3. Gabor Maté – Authenticity and Attachment

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3bynimi8HQ

4. Pink song: Fuckin’ Perfect

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hl0qf1pgjEs

5. Dr. Daniel Siegel “Name it to tame it” & “Mindsight”

https://drdansiegel.com/

6. Maya Angelou — 'I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better.'

7. David Richo “When the Past is Present”

https://www.amazon.com/When-Past-Present-Emotional-Relationships/dp/159030571X

Request for support from my listeners:

I am going to be moving back to Bend, OR and I would love to set up a small studio in my apartment so Kyle and I don’t have to use zoom. In order to do that I would need to buy two Dynamic XLR Microphones so we can sit at the same table together, as well as a mic stand and the XLR cords to go with. This can get expensive especially when mics can cost between $200 – 500$ each. This will help me save time and not have to spend on average 8hrs of editing on each episode. Since I haven’t been working because of COVID, I would love your support in donating 1-10$ to my Living connected Paypal account. A little goes a long way and I truly from the bottom of my heart would appreciate it. I will also give you a huge shout out on my podcast to those who have donated. If you would prefer to be anonymous that is okay too. Let me know in the notes if you would prefer not to have a shout out of gratitude.  

Donations to Paypal email: [email protected]

CONTACT INFORMATION:

 Email: [email protected]

Instagram: livingconnectednvc

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/LivingConnectedNVC/

Website: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1153175
 
Music is brought to you by: https://

Support the show

I have finally moved to Bend and I apologized for not keeping up on the podcast. It is so hard to move and edit all at the same time. I am doing my best to keep up on it. I think about how behind I am lol. Hang in there with me. This episode is so powerful and if you are okay with a lot of tears then be prepared for the mess I bring hehe. Rachelle gives me an opportunity to heal by giving me words that my dad and mom could have said to me. We talk about how devastating our culture can be with understanding death and the dying while other societies embrace and have rituals and traditions around the dying and grief.   

Rachelle Lamb is a recognized presenter, writer, poet and Nonviolent Communication℠ trainer and coach. She brings an earthy, practical yet innovative wisdom to her work curated over decades of study drawing from cultural anthropology, history, psychology, mythology, poetry, storytelling and deep ecology. Her synthesis of these disciplines provides a rich and fertile scaffolding for transformational dialogue and consistently produces powerful learning experiences for individuals and audiences who cite the learning as profound and life-changing.

PROMOTIONS: To schedule private sessions with Rachelle or register for a class, please visit her website at www.RachelleLamb.com.

Resources:

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow once said: “If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man's life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.”

Stephen Jenkinson: Book called: “Die Wise”
Website: https://orphanwisdom.com/

Matt Fraser:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mf0w9uPL7WI

 
Book: Being Mortal 
Medicine and What Matters in the End 

By:   Atul Gawande

Request for support from my listeners

I am going to be moving back to Bend, OR and I would love to set up a small studio in my apartment so Kyle and I don’t have to use zoom. In order to do that I would need to buy two Dynamic XLR Microphones so we can sit at the same table together, as well as a mic stand and the XLR cords to go with. This can get expensive especially when mics can cost between $200 – 500$ each. This will help me save time and not have to spend on average 8hrs of editing on each episode. Since I haven’t been working because of COVID, I would love your support in donating 1-10$ to my Living connected Paypal account. A little goes a long way and I truly from the bottom of my heart would appreciate it. I will also give you a huge shout out on my podcast to those who have donated. If you would prefer to be anonymous that is okay too. Let me know in the notes if you would prefer not to have a shout out of gratitude.  

Donations to Paypal email: [email protected]

CONTACT INFORMATION:

 Email: [email protected]

Instagram: livingconnectednvc

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/LivingConnectedNVC/

Support the show

I have been traveling in California seeing family and friends. I haven't put out an episode because its been so hard to edit while spending time with those I love. I am doing my best to keep up. Thank you for baring with me. Much love to you all. 

Our special guest is LaShelle Lowe-Chardé. She founded Wise Heart with a mission to help make a shift in consciousness about how we relate to life and each other. She dreams of a world in which becoming a relationship master is a central value in our global culture - a world in which we value and trust the quality of connection with ourselves and others as the foundation for collaborating to create and maintain a thriving life for all. Wise Heart seeks to join with others who support this shift in consciousness.

Over 20 years of training and experience have led to the articulation and creation of a system that integrates Mindfulness, Hakomi, and NVC that I call Mindful Compassionate Dialogue. This system provides a roadmap to becoming a relationship master by defining and operationalizing the essential aspects of creating a confident sense of self as well engaging in the consciousness and skills that facilitate living from compassion, wisdom, mindfulness, and agency. See interactive graphic for MCD here.

LaShelle is enormously grateful to the very many teachers and mentors she has had along the way and the enormous work others have done over many decades that have served our understanding of what it means to heal and live a fulfilling life.

She currently lives and works in Portland, Oregon, U.S. She is happily supported there by the beauty of nature, her husband, and loving community of friends and colleagues.

Request for support from my listeners

I am going to be moving back to Bend, OR and I would love to set up a small studio in my apartment so Kyle and I don’t have to use zoom. In order to do that I would need to buy two Dynamic XLR Microphones so we can sit at the same table together, as well as a mic stand and the XLR cords to go with. This can get expensive especially when mics can cost between $200 – 500$ each. This will help me save time and not have to spend on average 8hrs of editing on each episode. Since I haven’t been working because of COVID, I would love your support in donating 1-10$ to my Living connected Paypal account. A little goes a long way and I truly from the bottom of my heart would appreciate it. I will also give you a huge shout out on my podcast to those who have donated. If you would prefer to be anonymous that is okay too. Let me know in the notes if you would prefer not to have a shout out of gratitude.  

Donations to Paypal email: [email protected]

CONTACT INFORMATION:

 Email: [email protected]

Instagram: livingconnectednvc

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/LivingConnectedNVC/

Support the show

OMG, if anyone has a podcast or work with audio, you would know that different mics can sound different depending on how it is set up. The mic can be up right or the top facing you. And silly Kady decided to turn the mic to face her and the sound got all jacked up lol. (face in hands) So if the audio of my voice sounds off and or different, yup that's me messin' with things before recording and not testing it. LOL 

We get the honor to have Mary Mackenzie on our podcast. We asked Mary several questions about her experience with NVC, how it’s impacted her life moving forward, what can facilitators do when things are in high energy, and what exactly is NVC consciousness.

Mary Mackenzie, M.A., is an author, trained mediator, and CNVC Certified Trainer of Nonviolent Communication. She holds a master’s degree in human relations from Northern Arizona University and is the co-founder of the NVC Academy, ­the only online school for learning Nonviolent Communication.

Mary teaches Nonviolent Communication and other spiritually-based programs to individuals, couples, families, organizations, and spiritual communities through a wide variety of workshops and retreats. Her book Peaceful Living: Daily Meditations for Living with Love, Healing and Compassion offers inspiring practical methods for creating peace in our everyday lives.

As a pioneer of online NVC training, Mary runs her company in harmony with what she teaches. She and NVC Academy co-founder, Mark Schultz, paved the way to NVC online training in 2006 and have been instrumental in alleviating the financial and geographical barriers to learning NVC skills. 

Support the show

In several episodes I was obsessed (still am) with the book Permission to Feel by Marc Bracket. I still highly recommend reading. I tried to reach out to see if he could join me on my podcast and I was given the gift to talk to Nikki who has worked along side Marc and we enjoyed an amazing connection talking together. I am grateful to introduce Nikki Elbertson, M.Ed., is the director of content and communications at the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence. In various research and training roles at the Center since 2002, she has contributed to the development, implementation, and evaluation of RULER from early childhood through high school. Nikki has co-authored many of the Center’s research studies and curricula, including scholarly articles, papers, and book chapters. Her favorite emotion management strategy is teaching group fitness classes, which she’s been doing since 2008.

Resources:

https://www.rulerapproach.org/ 

Book: 

Permission to Feel by Marc Bracket

Request for support from my listeners

I am going to be moving back to Bend, OR and I would love to set up a small studio in my apartment so Kyle and I don’t have to use zoom. In order to do that I would need to buy two Dynamic XLR Microphones so we can sit at the same table together, as well as a mic stand and the XLR cords to go with. This can get expensive especially when mics can cost between $200 – 500$ each. This will help me save time and not have to spend on average 8hrs of editing on each episode. Since I haven’t been working because of COVID, I would love your support in donating 1-10$ to my Living connected Paypal account. A little goes a long way and I truly from the bottom of my heart would appreciate it. I will also give you a huge shout out on my podcast to those who have donated. If you would prefer to be anonymous that is okay too.  

Donations to Paypal email: [email protected]

CONTACT INFORMATION:

 Email: [email protected]

Instagram: livingconnectednvc

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/LivingConnectedNVC/

Website: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1153175
 
Music is brought to you by: https://www.purple-planet.com/

Support the show

We recorded this 7 days before my mom passed and I was so tired and exhausted. I had forgotten to put in my headphones in. It truly messed up my recording and you will hear my audio with both Kyle and David in the background. Because of this screw up it took me over 12 hrs to edit that is sooo long. I did give myself compassion for this. I wanted to give you heads up incase you heard some things that don’t line up. I know I am behind in keeping up on releasing of episodes. It’s been hard to edit when I am reliving listening to what it was like for me during my moms passing. It’s hard to hear. Thank you for your patience and understanding. 

This is a continuation of our time with David Weinstock. We are talking about how important relationship is, when it comes to NVC. We also have a listener who wrote in some questions for David and we were able to get answers to a couple of them. David talks about his practices with NVC. We do bring in some of the mourning and celebration that both have a sense of gratitude. David said, “When we listen with empathy we are listening to life. It’s the space around those moments of connection.” 

Parts of relationship is to know how to self-regulate. When we are in relationship with another person there might be part of our history that comes up when we have conflict. Being in relationship with another is to be in relationship with yourself. And that is having awareness for when we may need to self-regulate in high-energy moments. We can learn and grow being in the presence of others. When we feel contracted that is a sign to pay attention to, because we will then need to move into self-empathy if we can and connect to Self.

David has been phenomenal to speak to and get to know during this process. I hope it is the same for you. Please don’t hesitate to write us an email or send a voice memo we can share with all of our listeners. 

Resources:
NVC Global Rising:
https://www.community.nvcrising.org/

CONTACT INFORMATION:
 Email: [email protected]
Instagram: livingconnectednvc
Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/LivingConnectedNVC/
Website: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1153175
Music is brought to you by: https://www.purple-planet.com/

Support the show

We had the honor to have Dan on our podcast. Please feel free to send us any questions that you might have for him and we can try and have him on again to answer your questions. I wanted everyone to have a deeper understanding of the autism world that some of us may not know about. Cheers to you Dan! 

Daniel M. Jones (The Aspie World) is an international best selling author / video influencer with an award winning YouTube channel called The Aspie World.

The Aspie World is the biggest YouTube channel dedicated to autism from an autistic person in the world. The channel is dedicated to Autism awareness and understanding from an autistic person's point of view. 

Creating engagement with real people to create real change in a positive and uplifting way. And also helps raise money for charities like The National Autistic Society. 

Daniel has a diagnosis of Autism, OCD, ADHD and Dyslexia and uses his influence to help educate people about Autism using his skills of video and social media influence.

Daniel has also created the first ever neurodiverse panel talking about ADHD and Autism at VidCon US, which is the largest video convention in the world.

Resources:

Daniel Jones
Email: [email protected]
Web: www.TheAspieWorld.com 

Dan’s Online Course: https://learnautism.net/

Dan’s YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/AspieWorld1

Dan’s Instagram: theaspieworld

Dan’s Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/aspergers-autism-1-podcast-the-aspie-world/id1441602028

Autism alert cards: https://www.theaspieworld.com/shop/autism-alert-card/

Myhim Bialik’s Breakdown podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mayim-bialiks-breakdown/id1546456269?i=1000507406637

Disney+ Shortfilm called “Loop”

Facebook families with kiddos on the spectrum to follow: 

Finding Coopers Voice, Cody Speaks, Fathering Autism.

CONTACT INFORMATION:

 Email: [email protected]

Instagram: livingconnectednvc

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/LivingConnectedNVC/

Website: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1153175
 
Music is brought to you by: https://www.purple-planet.com/

Support the show