Welcome back! We're kicking off this season with a series called Lead! Leadership is crucial to every family, sports team, company, institution and organization! Everything sinks or swims because of leadership or the lack thereof. In this episode we will look at three steps we can all take to elevate leadership in our daily lives: studying the blueprint Jesus laid out for us, learning to take responsibility to carry heavy things, and walking a path for others to follow.

DISCUSSION GUIDE

Get to know you questions:

• Name three things about yourself.

• Share why you jumped into a Locker Room Group.

“We have a man problem.” God has put a high calling on us as men to lead and when we don’t, it has a dramatic impact on everything around us.

What are some ways that you see this “man problem” in our world, or for you personally?

Scott said, “Everyone ends up somewhere, but few people end up somewhere on purpose.” How can you be more intentional and deliberate about leading yourself so you can better lead those around you to better follow in the example of Christ?

Follow the Leader.  Hatfield gave us three practical ways that we can do that:

#1  Study the Blueprint. If we’re going to follow our leader, we have to see how Jesus led.

• How does getting in God’s Word and studying the gospels help us become better men?

• What steps can you take to better engage with the living Word of God?

#2  Carry heavy things. God has entrusted men with responsibility.  

Scott mentioned things like stewarding his creation, using our gifts to build up the church, spiritual leadership in our families, the gospel and its commission, and walking out the calling that God’s given us.

• What are some of the responsibilities God has entrusted us as men with? 

• Scott said, “Men are like trucks, they run better with a heavy load.”  Why are we better men when we embrace Godly responsibility?

• What are some responsibilities you have put down that you need to pick up?

#3  Walk a Path for Others to Follow.  

• Who are some Godly people who have invested in your life and whose examples you have learned from?

• Who are the people you are trying to be an example to?  What are you doing to invest in those relationships?  How are you feeling challenged?  

Three key passages that challenge men about the importance of the path:

• Luke 9:23 (NIV) Then he said to them all: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me. 

• 1 Corinthians 11:1 (NIV) Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.

• 1 Corinthians 16:13 (ESV) Be watchful; stand firm in the faith; act like men; be strong. 

Application:  

• Which of those passages challenge you the most and why?

• What’s your take-away from this first episode?  

• What step is the Holy Spirit challenging you to take?

Next Steps:

• Sign up for Locker Room Groups at southland.church/groups
• If you or someone you know is getting married soon or has been married for 5 years or less, sign up for our  2-Day Marriage Workshop (Fall 2025) on September 19/20 at this link:  Fall Marriage Workshop SIgnup
• For any other questions or comments email [email protected]

Season 14 has been a great one for Locker Room. There have been so many stories of men and encouragement we can apply daily in our fight. This week on the podcast, Ian Schweitzer joins Scott to reflect on all we’ve learned in this season together.

—

We want to challenge you to ask this question over the next several months in your quiet time: Jesus/Holy Spirit: What’s my next step as a Christ-follower, husband, dad or kingdom worker?

The book Scott referred to in this episode is Tempered Resilience by Tod Bolsinger.

NEXT STEPS

The live version of Fight Club—the men’s group Scott leads—will be at our Nicholasville Campus in August 2025. If you’ve not jumped in with us, or know someone who needs to—get the word out. We’ll have Fight Club on the Groups Directory at the end of July or early August so you can sign up. If you want to be a Table Leader at Fight Club who invests in the men, shoot an email to Scott at [email protected].

Before we sign off for this season we ask our Locker Room family to be praying for unity and protection in this year of transition at Southland (Weece to Nickell). Pray for Jon Weece, Scott Nickell, and their families, our Eldership, our staff and our church. There’s nothing the enemy would love to do more than attack us in the midst of this transition. Southland has been a remarkable place where we have had God’s favor. Locker Room, we want to keep it that way. Let’s pray for unity, fight for unity and seek to guard and protect the mission and character of our church.

Thanks for listening. Keep fighting! Keep leading! Keep investing!

We’ll catch you next time in August for season 15 of Locker Room.

Most of us know a family member, a friend, a co-worker, or someone we went to school with that is in a battle with some kind of addiction. The truth is, it may be you, reading this now. Maybe you’ve never acknowledged it. Maybe you’ve lived in denial about the daily struggle that you’re experiencing. Regardless of how this subject has impacted you, we hope that you’re encouraged in our conversation today.

Our guest this week is Mike Mueller. Mike is a husband, father and coach in our community who has been a part of Southland for 13 years.

On this episode Mike shares the story of how God changed his life and is now using him to impact lots of people who have struggled with some of the same things.

DISCUSSION GUIDE

Have you ever coached at the youth sports level? What is your favorite story from coaching kids?

Mike has served in several areas in the church (Connections, security, small groups, Men’s Retreat). What areas have you served in? If you don’t currently serve, what areas of ministry would you be best suited for?

Scott talks about how even if we don’t have the big name vices, most people have an addiction to something. What do you find yourself going back to time and time again despite the negative consequences? What are you addicted to?

Mike describes himself as a functional alcoholic. He did so much to cover up his addiction. Have you experienced this yourself or with someone you know? Why is this so dangerous?

Scott & Mike discussed the beauty of Rock Bottom. It’s the pivot point, it’s your opportunity to change, and to meet God. Have you ever had a Rock Bottom moment? What did God teach you there? What changed about you?

Read James 4:8-10. What does this passage teach us about how we deal with sin? What do you need to take from this passage to utilize in your own life?

Read Luke 9:23-24. What do you need to deny yourself of to follow Jesus? What are you still holding onto that’s keeping you from full life in Jesus?

Read Psalm 40:1-10. What does it look like to be fully authentic in front of God and others? Do you have a place to share the good, the bad, and the ugly of your story? For those who have shared their story, what was that experience like? How did God use that to grow you?

We want men to experience freedom. Is there something you are hiding and need to reveal to somebody? Will you confess it in this group? If not, will you email [email protected] and let us connect you to somebody to confess to?

What else from the podcast spoke to you?

What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?

NEXT STEPS 

• Visit the AA meetings that happen at our church:

• NIC Campus Thursday 6-8pm

• LEX Campus Tuesday 6-8pm

• GEO Campus Tuesday 7-8pm.

• Join a Group at southland.church/groups

• For any other questions or comments email [email protected]

“I need you to know that God seems to throw me hard things. You just need to know what you’re getting into.” - Kailen Combs Taylor

This week on Locker Room our guest Bryan Taylor sits down with Scott to share a powerful story of love, loss and hope. Bryan and Kailen shared five years together before they were separated by her death from cancer in 2015.

In our conversation today, Bryan shares about navigating the grief that began with Kailen’s diagnosis and what life was like after she passed away. Bryan also shares how he was able to move forward, choosing hope and rediscovering life after such a profound loss.

DISCUSSION GUIDE

If you had to give a title to the last 9 months of your life, what would it be and why?

“War” is the title of the story that Bryan labeled such a hard period of his life. Has there been a time in your life that looking back you would label as “war?”

In grief you often don’t know what to say, and sometimes people say things that aren’t helpful. What is something someone has said to you that was helpful in a moment of grief?

Read Hebrews 2:17. Jesus was fully human. He knew exactly what it was like to have to navigate grief and feel the weight of life being thrown at him. Jesus understands what it is like to experience loss, because he experienced loss during his life. When you’re navigating grief, is it easy for you to run to Jesus? Why or why not?

Scott and Bryan talked about how the physical act of writing and journaling has been helpful as they navigated grief. When you listen to the concept of writing and journaling, what does that make you think? Is it something you are open to trying?

Read Isaiah 55:8-9. How does choosing to accept the truth of these verses help us to navigate  grief by putting it in the proper perspective?

“It’s not the load that breaks you down; but the way you carry it.” What are some healthy ways we can choose to carry the circumstances life throws our way that won’t break us down?

Read Romans 8:35-39. The promise we can hold onto is that there is absolutely nothing in all creation that can separate us from the love of God that is in Jesus Christ.

Of the three insights Bryan gave at the end of the podcast, which one is hardest for you to hold onto when navigating hard times?  

(1) No amount of agony is enough to dim Christ’s love for you. 

(2) If you make your pain available to God, he won’t waste it. 

(3) Hold onto the hope of the resurrection. 

What else from the podcast spoke to you?

What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?

RESOURCES

• Even if You Don’t: A Love Story - Bryan Taylor

• The Lazarus Within: How to Choose Hope & Rediscover Your Life After Loss - Bryan Taylor

• A Grief Observed - C.S. Lewis

• Breaking Chains: Navigating Grief, with Gary Black - A Locker Room Podcast - February 28, 2025. 

• The Time We are Given, with James Rutledge - A Locker Room Podcast - March 22, 2021. 

NEXT STEPS 

• Memorize Romans 8:38-39. 

• Join a Grief Share Group at southland.church/groups

• For any other questions or comments email [email protected]

Providential relationships and pivotal circumstances are critical parts of great stories. Providential relationships are significant people God orchestrates to guide, support and shape our faith journey. Pivotal circumstances are events—both good and bad—that mark us, shape us and become a critical part of our story and testimonies.

Our guest this week—Daniel Mitchell—has lived a life marked by many providential relationships and events. Daniel joined the U.S. Marine Corps at age seventeen, landing in Tactical Air Navigation and later becoming a SERE instructor, also serving as a Chaplain.

Daniel and his wife Angela met while serving together at Southland's Lexington campus. Daniel now runs a handyman business/ministry and is also a counselor specializing in PTSD and sexual assault.

Jump in with us this week as we hear Daniel’s story, pivotal moments in his life and how, with God’s help, hope can drive out despair.

DISCUSSION GUIDE

If you could have any accent besides your own what would it be? (British, Western, Boston, etc.)

What is your favorite military movie of all time?

Daniel shared a miracle healing story from when he was 5 years old. Have you ever witnessed or experienced a miracle? Will you share that story?

“God has the best detours.” Daniel shared how God detoured his night of drinking to experience God’s love in a church. What detours has God placed in your life that showed you His grace and goodness?

Take 5 minutes or so for everyone to write down those 8-10 pivotal circumstances (good and bad) that have marked and changed your life. Does writing it down help you see how God was moving throughout your mountains and valleys?

Who have been the providential relationships that have guided, supported, & shaped your faith journey? Will you reach out to them and express gratitude for them? Will you look for opportunities to be that person for others around you?

“Where there is hope, despair doesn’t live.” Did you get a bit of joy or hope out of Daniel’s dog park story? Where do you find hope? In what ways can you manufacture hope if you don’t have any resources right now

Read Acts 9:15-16, 2 Corinthians 11:23-29, & 2 Corinthians 12:7-10. What can we learn from the suffering of Paul, how he handled it & how God handled it? What suffering or weakness do you need to bring to Jesus so He can be sufficient for you?

Read Romans 8:28 & 2 Corinthians 1:3-4. How can you cling to the promises God has made to us even in the darkest of time?

“Where you stare is where you will steer.” What have you been staring at (focusing, dwelling on) in your life? Does where you stare need to change?

What else from the podcast spoke to you?

What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?

NEXT STEPS 

• Join a Group at southland.church/groups

• For any other questions or comments email [email protected]

For most men, the key to our future and the quality of their life is in direct proportion with how we engage our past. We have to move towards our wounds in order to find healing. Regardless of our earthly father/step dad/absent dad, we need our good Heavenly Father to begin the work of healing us by fixing our past.

Our guest this week is no stranger to a challenging past. Brian and Scott sit down at the table to share from his life story of being put up for adoption and growing up in a tough family, but then allowing Jesus and godly people to help by acknowledging his wounds and finding healing. We’ll also dive into investing in our marriages, being an intentional dad, and expanding the circle through mentoring and discipling others.

DISCUSSION GUIDE

Brian takes the first 5 minutes of the episode to brag about his wife. It is so important to verbally express the things that you love about your wife. What are 2-3 things you are grateful for related to your significant other? Be sure to also express those feelings to them this week.

Brian mentions that despite everything that has happened in his life, he is a victor through Jesus, not a victim of the enemy. What have been the times in your life where you have felt like you were a victim of the enemy instead of being a victor through Christ? How has God been faithful through those times?

Scott and Brian take some time to talk through their relationship with their wives and kids and a word that summarizes their conversation well is intentionality. As men, we have to intentionally fight for what is most important. What are some ways you have been intentional in your relationships and what are some ways that you need to be more intentional?

Love for Jesus overflows into your love for your wife, which then overflows into your love for your kids. It has to be in that order. Do you find yourself prioritizing your kids over your wife? Do you find yourself prioritizing your wife over Jesus? What can we do to prioritize the right relationships so that we can best serve those we are about?

Read Ephesians 5:1-2. Think through some people who have made a strong impact on your life. Who is someone in your sphere right now that is doing what you want to be doing? Make a plan to talk to them this week to learn from them and to hear their story.

What are the areas in your life that you feel like you have to be perfect? Don’t put a burden on yourself that Jesus hasn’t placed on you. You don’t need to be perfect, because Jesus is perfect.

Read 1 Thessalonians 5:11. One of the best ways that we can love people as Jesus loves them is by speaking encouragement. Who is someone in your life that you can serve by encouraging them? It could be your wife, one of your kids, a co-worker, someone in your small group. Shoot them a text or give them a call and see how the Holy Spirit will move.

What else from the podcast spoke to you?

What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?

NEXT STEPS 

• Join a Group at southland.church/groups

• Join a Serving Team at southland.church/volunteer

• For any other questions or comments email [email protected]

Today’s episode is big topic in this Breaking Chains series: Navigating Grief. It’s not called overcoming grief, it’s not called conquering grief or dismantling grief, because—like it or not—grief is part of the story. You have to go through it. It’s not good for us to avoid it or go around it. Grief is universal.

Join us In this episode as Scott and Gary walk through many different types of profound loss we may experience in life, including stories from their own experiences. Along the way, we will find wisdom and hope in God’s word on how to move forward.

DISCUSSION GUIDE

Grief is a heavy topic so let’s start with a light question: Can you remember the time you laughed the hardest? (Or one of the times you’ve laughed the hardest?) Share the story with the group.

How do you define grief? The podcast defines grief as feelings of great sorrow, distress and emotional pain that stems from significant loss. What significant losses have you grieved in life?

The 5 stages of grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, & Acceptance. When you look back on your times of grief are these stages evident?

Gary’s 5 emotions connected to grief: Profound sadness, guilt, fear, physical fallout/symptoms, & aimlessness. Which of these emotions have you experienced the most in your times of grief?

Scott’s 7 things to help navigate grief: Community, anticipate awkwardness, lean into your faith, support groups, grief counseling, anticipate and plan for “grief triggers”, & grieve well. Which of those help you the most in times of grief?

“A good friend won’t lecture, correct, or react to our insanity [in times of grief].” What does it look like to help others when they are dealing with grief?

The enemy will lie to us in our grief. Read 1 Peter 5:7 & Matthew 11:28-30. What do these passages say about God’s heart for us during our grief?

Gary and Scott talked about grieving the loss of people to suicide. What from that discussion did you need to hear?

Read Revelation 21:4. Some grief will never go away on this side of Heaven. What hope can we place in this truth from Revelation about when Jesus returns?

“Please, don’t turn the helpers away.” - Paul David Tripp. Are you in need of help right now? Who can be your helper?

What else from the podcast spoke to you?

What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?

RESOURCES

Suicide:  

• Hope Always, Matthew Sleeth, M.D. 

Grief:

• The View From a Hearse, Joe Bayly

• Experiencing Grief, H. Norman Wright

• Good Grief, Granger Westberg

• It’s OK That You’re Not OK, Megan Divine

NEXT STEPS 

• Look at our Care resources for Grief Share, counseling referrals, and more at southland.church/care

• Join a Group at southland.church/groups

• For any other questions or comments email [email protected]

Our enemy understands the power of sin: the impact it can have on our lives and those we love. He knows if he can tempt, lie and deceive us into choosing sin—anything other than God’s best—then he can send us down a path that can really destroy our lives as men and wreck the things that matter to God.

Guests Will Briggs and Matt Williams join us this week on the podcast as we look at how we can recognize the plays of the enemy, the temptations and tendencies in our own hearts, and move forward on God’s path, breaking free of the chains of habitual sin.

DISCUSSION GUIDE

What are some of the daily habits in your life? Did these parts of your day become a habit intentionally or unintentionally?

What comes to mind when you think of the term “habitual sin.” Is it a specific sin? It is a certain memory? Is it a particular feeling or emotion?

The guys talked about how no one chooses to just blow up their life one day, but that sin begins to creep into our lives in small ways. Sometimes just a “small” lie of asking for a water cup to fill up with a coke. These “small” sins are ways that the enemy can get a foothold into our lives and a foothold can easily become a stronghold where the enemy has control over our actions. What are the “small” sins that the enemy is attempting to use to pull you away from Jesus?

Share a time when you struggled with habitual sin and the freedom you now have. What is a habitual sin that you struggle with right now? Celebrate the victory and acknowledge the struggle now.

Read Romans 6:5-7. When it comes to habitual sin, what do you believe is true? The enemy tries to convince us that we will always struggle with this and that we will never be truly free. But followers of Jesus are promised that they have everything they need to overcome this sin. Who are you listening to?

The guys mention 5 keys to overcoming habitual sin. Which of these keys have you overlooked in your struggle with habitual sin that you need to implement? 

1. Practice confession and repentance daily (Hebrews 4:16 & James 5:16). 

2. Ask God for help through prayer (Psalm 121:1-2). 

3. When we become a Christ-follower, sin is no longer our master (Romans 6:6-7 & Romans 6:22). 

4. God’s Word gives us the promise of God’s help in the face of temptation (1 Corinthians 10:12-13). 

5. We leverage the Holy Spirit in our lives (Galatians 5:24-25). 

“You can’t heal from what you hide.” The Bible teaches us that we do not have to hide in our sin and our shame but we can confidently come to God in our sin so that we may receive mercy and find grace. Is there a specific habitual sin that you need to confess to God and to another follower of Jesus?

What else from the podcast spoke to you?

What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?

NEXT STEPS 

• Take 45 minutes this week to read through and reflect on Romans 6. Bring a journal and a pen and sit with the Holy Spirit as you reflect on the truth of Scripture. 

• Join a Group at southland.church/groups

• For any other questions or comments email [email protected]

This week on Locker Room we’re starting a three-part series called Breaking Chains, looking at three things that can lock us down and stop the work Jesus wants to do in us. First up is perfectionism.

Join Scott and returning guest Gary Black as we talk about some of the downsides of perfectionism and offer practical suggestions to get a handle on it, so we can step onto the path of freedom—freedom from self-imposed guilt, needless anxiety, unnecessary pressure, and the many compulsions associated with perfectionism that can drain the joy from our lives.

DISCUSSION GUIDE

Who was your favorite teacher growing up? What made them so great?

Has anyone made an impact on your life that you only met once? Who was it and what impact did it have?

What comes to mind when you hear the word “perfectionism”? Is that something you struggle with? Or are you on the other side and no one would ever call you a perfectionist?

The Dangers of Perfectionism: It destroys your initiative. It damages relationships. It destroys happiness. It leads to a rules-dominated life. It leads to constant over-analysis and fear-based decisions. Which of these dangers have you witnessed from your life or those around you?

Action Step 1: Admit you have a problem. Read Psalm 32:1-5. Is there a problem of perfectionism you need to admit today? Or anything else you need to confess?

Action Step 2: Stop demanding perfection from others. Read 1 John 1:8. No one is perfect, including you! Where do you find yourself demanding perfection from others? (Friends, coworkers, kids, wife, etc). How can you release them from those demands?

Action Step 3: Develop a realistic awareness of God’s love. Read Romans 8:38-39. Do you really believe God the Father has adopted you and loves you unconditionally? Even in the highs and lows? What does it look like to “relax and enjoy God’s love” as Gary says?

Action Step 4: Go out of your way to love others. Read Colossians 3:12-14. Who are you serving in life? Where are you serving? Where are you living out what Paul calls us to in this passage?

The best time to change is now. What will you change today to start becoming who you want to be tomorrow?

What else from the podcast spoke to you?

What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?

NEXT STEPS 

• Join a Group at southland.church/groups

• For any other questions or comments email [email protected]

The words we speak should reflect a heart transformed by God.

Grace and truth should drive us in our conversations, whether it be with our wives, our kids, our friends, people at church, people at work, people that don’t believe what we believe, and those who aren’t fans of Christianity at all. Grace and truth, in every conversation.

Our special guests this week are two of Southland’s elders, Rob Campbell and Rob Workman.

Join us as we dive into how to speak life with our words.

DISCUSSION GUIDE

What is something you learned from the guys as they talked about the ways other men have invested in them and how they’re investing in their marriages & their kids?

Scott mentions a number of times in the Bible where the words that are said have power. God speaks creation into existence. Jesus literally speaks life into Lazarus. Jesus speaks the words “Be still!” and a storm ceases. What do these passages say about the importance of words?

Read Matthew 12:36-37. What is Jesus saying about the impact our words have?

Has there been a moment when someone has spoken life into you?

Scott and the guys talked through 4 points of how we can be better at using our words to speak life. Below are some thoughts and questions to reflect on each of these points:

(1) Bring grace and truth into every conversation.

One of the best things we can do to gauge how we use our words is to ask someone close to us what they think of the language we use. Who can you ask this week? What do you imagine they would say?

(2) Using our words to talk to people about Jesus through telling your story.

Vulnerability and authenticity lead to curiosity. When we’re talking to people who don’t follow Jesus, two of the best ways to reflect the love of Jesus to them are to be vulnerable and authentic. Is it easy for you to do these two things? What can you do to be more vulnerable or more authentic in your relationships with people?

(3) Own it when you mess up.

Who do you need to have a conversation with to own a way that you’ve messed up? Is there someone at work? Your wife? One of your kids?

If you never apologize, you cannot expect other people to apologize to you. You need to own it and take the first step in order to set the culture.

(4) Express gratitude, appreciation, and encouragement.

Encouragement means to breathe courage into people. It is easy to forget what is true. Who is one person in your life you can encourage by telling them you are thankful for or proud of them? What can you tell your wife to remind her that you love her and want to serve her? What can you tell your kid to remind them that you are proud of them? What can you tell a friend to show them you’re thankful for them?

What else from the podcast spoke to you?

What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?

NEXT STEPS 

• Join a Group at southland.church/groups

• For any other questions or comments email [email protected]