Look Good for the Boys

For every undead relationship destined to end by someone walking off into the sunlight, there’s one that just needs to find the right vein. So, Andy and Philip kick off this “season of love” by counseling queer vampires’ biggest celebrity couple: Louis and Lestat from Interview With the Vampire (1994).

Andy and Philip don’t feel comfortable going to a theater right now, so we decided to just create our own version of Scream (2022). No spoilers, obviously, because we just made it all up!

Andy and Philip don’t care what your favorite scary movie is. We just want to know: who’s the hottest victim of the Scream franchise? Ghostface kills ‘em, we rank ‘em.

Andy and Philip are trying to work through their pile of ultra low-budget, direct-to-video/streaming movies (AKA The Vertical Stack) starting with the 2016 Maryland regional horror anthology Terrortory.

Andy and Philip round out this bizarro year with the horror movies and TV shows we most want to f**k, marry, and kill; as well as giving out awards for Top Drawers, Closed Caskets, Rick of the Year, Not My Final Girl, Semi Final Girl, and more!

Have you been good ALL year, or were you naughty and need to be punished? Either way, Andy and Philip have a little Christmas present for you: our victim rankings of Silent Night, Deadly Night 4, 5, and the 2012 “remake” (...?), as well as our Top 10 hottest victims of the entire series.

In the spirit of the holidays, Andy and Philip rank the hotness of every victim in the most prolific of the Christmas horror franchises: Silent Night, Deadly Night, beginning with the first three films.

We’re baaaaack! And we are dying to dish about all the 80’s-flavored fashion of the Poltergeist trilogy, but especially the ultimate psychic fashion icon: Tangina (Zelda Rubenstein), who is serving major psychic grandma vibes with iconic variations like: lady who brunches, Santa Fe retiree, and archeologist medium (complete with dig site vest). Listen up as Andy and Philip take on the fashions (and kindertraumas) of Poltergeist (accessorized by some complicated family dynamics, Republican ghosts, hidden pregnancies, and a few FMKs).

Andy and Philip are still on break, but we’ve cooked up a spicy little side dish to add to your Thanksgiving feast: some stale leftover Halloween candy! So, carve out a little extra time this holiday weekend to hear us attempt to digest Halloween Kills!

Andy and Philip are nursing their Halloween “hangovers” and taking the month of November off to recuperate. While you wait patiently for a delicious holiday smorgasbord of meaty material, here’s a little snack to tide you over: a rambling conversation about recent things we’ve watched including Lamb, V/H/S 94, Girl School Screamers, Terminal Island, and Alone in the Dark (1982).