Matt Poepsel hosts the “Lead the People” podcast and is the author of Expand the Circle. His mission is to help us liberate ourselves from outdated attitudes and behaviors that hold us back from our true potential. When working with organizations, Matt partners with HR Leaders, Executives, and Team Leaders who seek to help their leaders—and themselves—embody an enlightened leadership approach.

Quotes:

• “We are grateful and honored that you choose to spend time with us every week...because there are literally millions of podcasts out there.”[2:12] Welcome to the 200th episode of Love in Action, this is no small feat and as he celebrates, Marcel Schwantes thanks his listeners from around the globe as well as his incredible guests. 
• “Leadership holds such potential for us to change our organizations for the better.” [9:54] As Marcel and Matt Poepsel, PhD dive into their discussion, Matt explains his love/hate relationship with leadership. He feels it has so much power and importance but as a whole it's not getting the development, attention, and service it deserves.
• “How do we cast off these outdated notions, attitudes, and beliefs about what leadership is?” [12:05] The theme of Matt’s book, Expand the Circle…Enlightened Leadership is defined by Matt as a modern, contemporary, and less selfish version of leadership.
• “Being, Belonging, and something Bigger than myself…we all want these things.” [24:24] Matt introduces the 3 B’s in a team context and how leaders can lead teams and help teams find identification and inclusivity. 
• “Leadership isn’t just the domain of the most senior person in the room.” [27:16]When talking about leading the organization, Marcel makes the point that not everyone wants to be in the C-Suite. Matt explains that anyone can influence the organization and the collective whole in many ways like reinforcing values and influencing the teams around them.
• “When people feel connected to mission, and to one another, and to their own potential selves…that is the place of enlightened leadership and that is only gonna happen through love.” [37:29] Matt shares inspiring words when it comes to what Love in Action means to him.

Mentioned in this episode:
Matt Poepsel
Matt Poepsel, PhD | LinkedIn
Marcel Schwantes

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• “A toxic work culture was found to be 10.4 times greater than compensation in predicting a company's attrition rate relative to its industry average.” [1:23] Marcel explains the not so shocking reason why workers left jobs in droves in the 2021 Great Resignation. 
• “When leaders lack empathy, fail to communicate clearly, or prioritize their own interests over the well-being of their employees, it can lead to a toxic environment.”[2:13] As Marcel says, toxic work culture is not built overnight, it happens with consistently poor behavior in leadership that seeps into every aspect of the organization. 
• “It is about bringing our deepest sense of right, authentic caring, and highest ideals to business. It is about achieving success beyond success, measured in the flourishing of human lives.” [4:41] Marcel quotes  CEO of Barry-Wehmiller, Bob Chapman, to emphasize his point on the importance of prioritizing people over profit.

Mentioned in this episode:
Marcel Schwantes

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Marshall Goldsmith is a renowned executive coach recognized as the #1 Leadership Thinker in the World. His latest book is The Earned Life: Lose Regret, Choose Fulfillment.

Quotes:

• “So if you’ve ever been caught in a cycle of regret—and I think that’s most of us—Marshall is here to tell us how to remove the obstacles that prevent us from creating our own fulfilling lives. And who better to help us remove those obstacles than the #1 ranked executive coach in the world.” [3:47] Dr. Marshall Goldsmith is an expert in building a fulfilling life. He joined us on the podcast to have this all-too-important conversation. 
• “A lot of my life is just great mentors."  [5:47] Marshall took us through his story—how he got to where he is today, and what he learned along the way. It’s a true rags-to-riches story. 
• Marshall talks about how his book impacts already-successful people and what that has taught him about life. “Part of the problem with goal achievement is that you can forget your aspiration.” [10:19] 
• As Marshall says, achieving goals is important, but it’s critical not to overvalue these goals. If you stumble into that pitfall, you’ll find that: “You can forget to enjoy the process of life.” [10:28]
• “Never become attached to achievement. Never become attached to results. It’s a fool's game for two reasons. One is, you don’t have total control over the results. Two is, let’s say, you achieve the results. How much satisfaction does that bring?” [13:00] 
• “An earned life makes only a few demands of us.” [18:47 Marshall points to the importance of living your own life and not living through social media or the internet. 
• Marshall discusses “the every breath paradigm.” [24:20] As a practicing Buddhist, Marshall holds the ‘every breath paradigm’ at the core of his day-to-day life. Every time you wake up, you get a fresh start. Life isn’t just a series of successes; you constantly get chances to start over and turn over a new leaf. 
• Marshall and I agree: “We choose to become who we want rather than holding on to our past.” [27:53]
• At the end of the day, Marshall’s self-proclaimed mission is simple. “My bigger mission is to help people before I die and after I die.” [38:51] 
• We ended with some really profound advice from Marshall. “We’re going through hard times, and it’s important to have a support group.” [42:22] The past couple years have been tough on all of us. So it’s critical to have a support system around you for times like these. 
  
  

Mentioned in this episode:
Marshall Goldsmith: www.marshallgoldsmith.com

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Sally Helgesen is the world’s premier expert on women’s leadership and the author of Rising Together.  She became the first person to write about inclusion in the workplace in 1995 with her book, The Web of Inclusion. In this episode of Love in Action, Sally and Marcel discuss the nuances of triggers and inclusive behaviors. 

Quotes:

• “A trigger is a situation, or person, or a comment that stirs an emotional response in us.” [15:15] Whether it’s anger, shock, resentment, or horror, these emotional responses can be triggered by many factors, including race, ethnicity, age, and much more. These triggers lie well outside our circle of control but can become a major concern. Sally Helgesen’s goal with her book, Rising Together, is to take a look at the workplace and answer the question: How do we find a positive path forward for ourselves and the co-worker who has triggered us?
  
  
• “Telling ourselves this different story gives us a potential positive path forward.” [20:20] Visibility is one of the big triggers Sally talks about in her book. She explains many situations and reasons why one may become triggered by visibility. The solution: Rewrite the script. Put a positive spin on it (you don't even have to truly believe it) and come through to the colleague who triggered you in a way that validates your idea.
  
  
• “Being professional in a situation, being clear about your intentions, and engaging from your heart is a lot more important than always trying to demonstrate your own authenticity.” [31:35] What are you trying to say?! This is a big trigger that comes from being around diverse groups in the workplace and not being comfortable. Whether it's understanding cultures and religions, learning pronouns, or remembering and pronouncing different names, it’s important to make the effort with clear and professional intentions.
  
  
• “It’s not fair! We are so triggered by fairness. It really cuts to the bottom of our self esteem and our ability to make a contribution.” [35:20] Trigger number 5 from the book and the final one discussed in this episode is fairness. The reality is that it’s not a fair world, and it’s not a fair workplace. Sally shares how rewriting the script and opening dialogue in an “unfair” situation to get all the information before reacting.
  
  
• “What can I do to offer this person the benefit of my good will?” [42:12] The steps to bridge the gap to a more inclusive workplace come from generosity, grace, and the benefit of your goodwill. This is the other half of writing those positive scripts, which involves building relationships and positivity across the lines of gender, race, age, or ethnicity.

Mentioned in this episode:
Sally Helgesen
Sally Helgesen on LinkedIn
All Rise with Sally Helgesen
RISING TOGETHER: How We Can Bridge Divides and Create a More Inclusive Workplace
Marcel Schwantes

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Enjoy this sneak peek for Marcel Schwantes’s Fall 2024 upcoming book. Marcel shares something too many managers are missing, 3 attributes that make up the best leaders.

Show Notes: 

• “In transparent work cultures, you can count on the guardians of the culture, trusted team members and associates, to watch out for politics or favoritism behind the scenes and squash such behaviors as soon as it happens.” [2:54] Marcel starts his list of the three attributes of the best leaders with transparency. The best leaders are role models of transparency, allowing no room for toxic behavior.
• “One-on-one meetings don't have to have an agenda. They're used mostly to find out how things are going and whether people have questions or concerns about the business or a particular strategy in play.” [5:20] Winning attribute number 2, The best leaders don't neglect the power of one-on-one meetings. Marcel shares two simple questions for these meetings that affirm the employee's value and voice and spawn great ideas for how to run the business better.
• “Psychological safety curbs the fear that historically makes it difficult for workers to think clearly and act confidently on their own to make decisions. It helps to eliminate the authoritarian tactics of bosses yelling at workers for making mistakes or not knowing things."  [7:10] The best leaders foster an environment of psychological safety. Marcel shares the research between this term coined by Harvard Business School professor Amy Edmondson, who explains it as ‘a shared belief that the team is safe for interpersonal risk-taking.’

Mentioned in this episode:
Marcel Schwantes

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In a preview for his upcoming book in Fall 2024, Marcel Schwantes shares a personal story of the physical manifestation of stress and the adverse effects of a fear driven work relationship.

Show notes:

• “After checking myself into the emergency department, the ER physician called my condition stress and anxiety related. He explained that people may experience psychological distress as physical pain, a process known as somatization.” [1:35] Marcel Schwantes shares an excerpt from his up-and-coming book, a personal story of pain and stress viewed by his boss as insubordination. 
• “Most of us have been in varying degrees of boss-to-subordinate relationships, reporting to managers with different experience levels, personality types, and ways of seeing the world around us. Many of us were adversely affected by those work relationships and even may have lost our jobs, health, or dignity. Or perhaps worse.”[3:13] These “People Challenges” as Marcel calls them have a deep effect on our wellbeing, and when they become negative it's not only our work performance that suffers.
• “Feelings of connection, belonging, psychological safety, teamwork, and close bonds are what make the best work environments.”[7:13]  Marcel gets honest about the work environment people need and it’s definitely not fear. Leaders who uphold these listed qualities foster better work environments and will have healthy and more productive employees. 

Mentioned in this episode:
Marcel Schwantes

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A look back at the stand out quotes from this special episode replay on Mark Crowley’s Lead From The Heart: 

• “I have science that proves that the heart actually plays an enormous role in influencing human behavior.” [8:23] Mark explains the sentiment behind his original book and new revision Lead From The Heart.
  
  
• “The strength of a heart based leader is to see the potential in others and have the belief in them that they don’t have in themselves.” [15:18] Marcel comments on the change that can happen in an employee when working with a leader who truly believes in them and sees what they don’t see within themselves. 
  
  
• “The heart and the mind are actually connected and the heart actually sends more communication to the mind than the other way around.” [28:25] Mark gets into the science behind his idea of leading from the heart, in which feelings genuinely influence our minds. He shares research from Heart Math that explains that when people are working in a positive, appreciated environment, they operate at their most optimal performance in what they call coherence. 
  
  
• “Recognize that just because you have an opening, and someone comes who wants the job is the right fit for it.” [37:43] Mark explains the principle of Hiring from the Heart, having a high performing team is about using great discipline in how you hire.
  
  
• “You have to adapt to your employees; so you have to know what’s important to them and know how to support them.” [39:50] Building a Relationship, Mark says, is not just spending time with your staff but getting to know their needs and wants and how you can help them be successful. That builds trust and provides a positive environment. 
  
  
• “If you’re a manager, you know something about what your employees do all day...  So teach them, coach them, give them your time.” [40:50] Giving Time is an investment that Mark shares as an important responsibility and commitment for leaders.
  
  
• “There is a significant gap between what people feel from their manager and what managers think they’re doing for them.” [42:20] Mark encourages leaders to make real Recognition a priority for their employees.
  
  
• “Any act of kindness, coaching, validation, or appreciation… Is a micro manifestation of love.” [55:13] What does it mean to love your people? Mark wants leaders to know that these positive emotions are not the romantic version of love but real, authentic, professional ways to do business and lead. 

Mentioned in this episode:
Mark C. Crowley
Mark C. Crowley & Associates on LinkedIn
Emotional: How Feelings Shape Our Thinking Hardcover
The Extended Mind: The Power of Thinking Outside the Brain: Paul, Annie Murphy
Influence Is Your Superpower: The Science of Winning Hearts, Sparking Change, and Making Good Things Happen
Permission to Feel: Unlocking the Power of Emotions to Help Our Kids, Ourselves, and Our Society Thrive eBook : Brackett,Ph.D., Marc

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Kathi Balasek is a grief literacy communication coach and widow advocate.  Through her podcast, Well Widow, and being on the advisory board at Modern Widows Club, she stands up and fights for the rights of widows, their livelihood, and their financial future. Along with her mission driven business, Grief Smart Professional, she is a university professor, and currently she teaches at California State University, Chico, in the Department of Communication and Education. She has a passion for motivating leaders to develop communication skills that engage and connect.

Show-Notes:

• “You need to grieve, you have to grieve, but where are you gonna find the time?” [9:26] Kathi Balasek shares her story and the painful loss of her husband. She describes one of the most challenging aspects of this time as finding the time to grieve amidst her ever growing todo list. But grieving is not a luxury; it’s a necessary part of life and loss.
  
  
• “When we look at another griever, join them in where they are. That’s empathy.” [19:30] It can be difficult for some to break past the barrier of ‘I don’t know what they’re going through’. Kathi emphasizes that you don’t have to be a widow or walk in a widow’s shoes to connect emotionally and share empathy. Versus sympathy, a pity or sorrowful emotion that does not create connection or provide support. 
  
  
• “When we avoid grief, we dismiss it, we justify it…it causes disenfranchised grief and people think they aren’t allowed to heal."  [29:28] Leaders, what is the first step to acknowledging and supporting your people through grief? Becoming aware of your unconscious bias. Kathi outlines three common areas where leaders might be biased toward loss in the unspoken ‘hierarchy of loss’; age, type of death, and relationship. Kathi also shares how she supports leaders to understand, support, and normalize a safe space to talk about these areas of loss.
  
  
• “You will attract a team, employees, and clients with your company, but you will keep them when you connect with them on an emotional level in their deepest, darkest times." [35:51] Marcel asks Kathi to describe how CEOs and C-Suite leaders can make the value of the grief process an ingrained part of their culture. Kathi explains that grief language and grief and bereavement policies need to become part of the brand, a part of who they are and how they operate. Grief is a universal experience, and it deserves connection and understanding.
   
• “Grief never goes away, we learn to wear it differently, we learn to walk along side it but when we have support and community, people around us support us in good times and bad." [38:45] Listening to this episode, if you, as a leader, are experiencing some form of grief or loss, Kathi has some advice for how to handle it and stay healthy. First, get permission to take time to deal with your grief. You cannot give from an empty cup. Next, find community and professional support. Last, remember your physical health; food, water, and exercise go a long way. Whatever you do, do not ignore grief; you have to face it head on and the people around you will be there for support.

Mentioned in this episode:
Kathi Balasek on LinkedIn
Kathi Balasek
Robb Holman
Marcel Schwantes

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Mark Miller currently serves as Chick-fil-A’s Vice President of High Performance Leadership. He is the author of Culture Rules: The Leader's Guide to Creating the Ultimate Competitive Advantage. He shares his interesting and inspiring employment journey with Chick-fil-A and his thought provoking process for researching and impacting leaders in their organization and organizations all over the world.

• “As we saw issues and challenges in our organization and organizations around the planet, we believe that if you pull back the curtain, the root cause was actually a cultural issue."  [9:40] On a mission to serve leaders and solve problems, the topic of culture came up more and more with Mark Miller and his colleagues. 
  
  
• “Culture is the cumulative effect of what people see, hear, experience, and believe."  [13:08] Culture is a powerful element in an organization, but it's also unique and invisible, so Mark brings forward a new working definition for the term culture. In writing this definition, he had an important realization…who has the biggest impact on what people see, hear, experience, and believe? Leaders.
  
  
• “Rule number 1 is Aspire: The leader must share their hopes and dreams for their culture.” [26:02] This might seem like a no-brainer, but there are too many leaders in the world who aren't doing this. It has to move out of your head and your heart so that others around you can collaborate on your vision. It’s got to be clear, simple, and repeatable.
  
  
• “The second rule is to Amplify: always look for ways to amplify the aspiration.” [26:52] Mark and his team chose the word amplify very purposefully to break past the noise. The aspiration HAS to have staying power; it needs life, flavor, and amplification. The best way to amplify your aspiration is to model with your daily actions. 
  
  
• “The third rule is to adapt: to constantly work to enhance the culture.” [28:38] You cannot declare victory. The work on culture is never over; it is never perfect. You have to consistently and continuously adapt it to your changing organization; without this rule, you will certainly face defeat. The key to adapting well is listening well.
  
  “I came for the job, but I stayed for what I might become.” [45:15] Throughout this episode, Mark speaks about his journey of employment with Chick-fil-A. He shares this statement inspired by a quote from Ready Player One, a movie and book of the same title, about the impact the culture can have on the inspiration of who someone can become in your organization. He experienced it in his own employment journey, and it can be a valuable aspiration for any leader in their own organization. 

Mentioned in this episode:
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Mark Miller - Leadership
Culture Rules
Marcel Schwantes

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Joshua Freedman is the co-founder and CEO of Six Seconds, a global non-profit dedicated to teaching people how to use emotional intelligence (EQ). He is a master certified coach, an instructor for Columbia Teachers College Summer Principals Academy, and for Antioch University. He is also the author of 5 emotional intelligence books, including the best-selling At the Heart of Leadership: How to Get Results with Emotional Intelligence.  

Show-Notes:

• “Emotional Intelligence is about getting this emotional data and using it to effectively solve problems.” [9:56] What is emotional intelligence? What is it not? EQ expert Josh Freedman dispels the myths and explains how emotional intelligence is more than just being nice and positive. There is not one single way to be emotionally intelligent; there are many ways to find resolutions—confronting, ignoring, and working through—all of which are unique to the problem and other emotional factors. 
• “When people feel more anxious and isolated, they move into more primal reactions…  This kind of tribalism is part of what we’re seeing in polarization, not just in the US but all over the world.” [20:22] Josh comments on the problems and difficulties caused by these tribal reactions, as seen in the decline of EQ in the last two years. It’s hard to love, to lead, to collaborate…  Making the presence of EQ more valuable and important than ever before. 
• “I’m not saying change who you are; I’m saying use who you are and use it better to get the results you’re really looking for. Not just short term wins.” [27:28] We all have the ability to learn and grow.  It may take time and maybe be a big shift, but Josh says with work, it is possible. And as Marcel says, you need to exercise those emotional muscles, to create new synapses and increase emotional intelligence.
• “[As leaders, we need to think], let me understand what’s going on for this person or this group of people and figure out what’s going on and how we can overcome that so we can work together and get results.” [35:14] There is no denying that there is a great generational difference in EQ. Josh dives into the research of State of the Heart, where he explains that post pandemic the younger generations, Gen Z and Millennials experience the greatest loss in connection. This creates a big emotional barrier at work, especially when generations are coming into the same place of work on different playing fields.
• “EQ values have to become part of the DNA of how you work.” [38:22] Okay, leaders, you're all in and ready to invest in the EQ of your organization… Josh tells you what not to do, slap a training on the sign or haphazardly invest in an external coach. While coaching and training are important, Josh and Marcel agree that the values and actions of emotional intelligence must be reinforced and become ingrained in the organization.
• “That little pivot from I to WE (I’m seeing this; how can WE work on it?) will totally shift your conversations around performance and motivation.” [42:16] Josh has a practical tip for leaders on employee motivation. You don’t have to sacrifice performance for EQ; instead, you will find greater performance. The key is to think….are we leading tasks or are we leading people?

Mentioned in this episode:
State of the Heart EQ Research
Six Seconds
Six Seconds | LinkedIn
Six Seconds (@6secondseq) on Instagram
Six Seconds (@6secondseq) on Twitter
Six Seconds on Facebook 

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