Hawk is not holding back on the MAGA madness! This time, he's tackling a Rolling Stone article about pro-Trump election deniers infiltrating swing state election offices. But don't worry, he's not buying the fear-mongering. He's pretty sure 70 conspiracy-loving Gomer Pyles can't outvote millions of sane Americans. Plus, he reminds us that Trump's not in the White House anymore, so his "find me 11,780 votes" shtick might not fly this time.

Our host then dives into the Republican obsession with controlling everyone's lives, wondering why they're so fixated on other people's business. He ponders if they're all just incredibly repressed, noting that Grindr crashed during the Republican convention in Milwaukee. Apparently, these good Christian soldiers love Jesus almost as much as they love...well, you get the idea.

Finally, Hawk gushes about Kamala Harris's campaign like a teenager with a new crush. He's practically doing cartwheels over her fundraising numbers and volunteer sign-ups. Meanwhile, he paints Trump as a rambling old man talking about electric boats and Hannibal Lecter. Hawk's so confident in a Harris victory, he's already planning the "I told you so" party. Just don't invite Chuck Schumer - Hawk's not sure what that guy's been doing for the last four years anyway.

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