Man Shopping with Stacie

In this episode, I share stories from Christmases past as a single person.  I begin with a story from when I was newly separated from my daughter's dad.  I felt very much like an outsider as Lanie and I were gathered with a group of friends to go on a Christmas lights tour of our neighborhood.  I couldn't believe I was going through a divorce.  Although we were with a wonderful group of supportive friends, I felt alone.
Our second Christmas was worse because I was away for Pharmaceutical Rep training for the the entire Christmas season. 
Our third Christmas was different because we shared Christmas morning with my boyfriend and his children.  We broke up on the 26th.
Although these early Christmases sucked for the most part. Lanie and I were b building our Christmas traditions.  There was a lot of baking, ice skating, visiting family and friends, and church.
I also share stories from our recent Christmases.  
After an argument with my ex over Christmas decorations during my separation from my second husband, Lanie and I took matters into our own hands.  We bought a new Christmas tree and decorations.  After the stress and arguing, I learned that it is sometimes better to not sweat the small stuff - especially at Christmas. 
Now, all is calm, all is bright.  I never could've imagined the peaceful life Lanie and I share now. We've vacationed the past couple of years just before Christmas.  We live in a new house and are surrounded by  an amazing group of friends and family. 
This life didn't just happen by chance though. My daughter and I have chosen who we share life with carefully.  We have focused on health and happiness.  
It is my hope that you can focus on providing a peaceful and joyous Christmas with your kids despite any drama with your ex or personal struggles you are feeling.  By building traditions with your children, you are gifting them with stability and memories that will last a lifetime.  
Merry Christmas to my sweet and supportive podcast family!

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My 16 year old daughter, Lanie, joins me to share her thoughts and feelings about my dating life since my second divorce.  

She begins by sharing some memories of time she spent with my rebound," Mr. Wonderful".  She recollects things we all did together and gives her opinion of the flags I saw and shared with her during the relationship. She also gives some solid advice on how to communicate with a kid after an adult relationship ends.

Next, she talks about the time Nashville Nic visited our house for a brief overnight while he was passing through Kansas City on his way to Colorado.  She wished that he engaged in more conversation with her.  To be fair, I did not know about or share that expectation with him.  We are all learning here, including me.

Lastly, she gives a new guy, "Ice Cream" kudos for spending about 20 minutes chatting it up with her in person a few weeks ago.  She sends a clear message to any new guy that enters our lives to "Be like Ice Cream!".  

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In this season of thankfulness,  I express appreciation to some of the men I've dated in the past couple of years. I thank these guys for teaching me what I'm NOT looking for in a partner, valuable lessons, and behaviors and qualities I need to improve on too.
On the biggest shopping day of the year, Black Friday, I reminisce on some of the lessons I've learned from my Man Shopping adventures.   It is my hope that as you listen to my gratitude to the men I've dated, you'll think back on some of your previous relationships and find some lighthearted examples of thankfulness in your own lives, too.

To the men I've listed below, I am so thankful for our brief time together... Thank You, NEXT

• Detective Daniel 
• Selfie King
• Freddy Kruger
• Puppy Dog
• Army Guy
• Average Joe
• Ryan Gosling
• Hoosier

Lastly, I share a Thanksgiving message to my listeners.  I can't help but wonder what the holiday season brings to you this year.  I share a tearful wish that you make the most of this special time in your life.

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My 16 year old daughter, Lanie, joins me for a conversation about her recollections of my dating life when she was a preschooler and kindergartner.  

She shares her vague memories of spending time with my rebound boyfriend, "Funcle". 

Then, she talks about our time with "KStater" and his kids. To my delight, she tells us that I did not ruin Christmas after all...Santa brought an Easy Bake Oven!

Lastly, she reminisces about meeting my Ex and his daughters.  

Essentially, she doesn't remember much from the early years, folks. When she was too young to understand dating, a couple of play dates and even overnights were fun times then and now blurry but happy memories.

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In this episode, I share insights into what it has been like dating as the mother of a high schooler.  

I begin by talking about my rebound relationship with my childhood friend.  I was a little nervous to tell my daughter, Lanie, about the relationship because my divorce was not even final yet.  I was worried of what kind of example I was setting  and I was concerned she'd be disappointed in me.

Because I had known him for so long, loved & trusted him, I was excited to introduce Lanie to him.  In time, he and Lanie met and even started to develop a little relationship of their own.  "Mr Wonderful" also reconnected with my mother.  When our relationship ended, my daughter was a little disappointed "Mr Wonderful" didn't reach out to her for some closure. Maybe that was her first lesson of how our feelings can be hurt from  break-ups - even if we are innocent bystanders.

After my second divorce, my daughter made it very clear with me that she did not want me to keep anything from her... including my love life.  So, we had several conversations about it and agreed to be open and honest with each other about our feelings and our romantic lives.  I think it's important to keep in mind that relationships are two way streets.  This includes our relationships with our children.  Lanie and I have remained transparent with one another regarding our dating relationships since we moved out on our own.  What a gift.

Over that past couple of years, Lanie has been privy to who I've been interested in and have gone on dates with.  She shares her opinions openly with me on the men and I share my opinions on high school boys with her.  

I also share a story of when Nashville Nic dropped by our house out of the blue...

Next week, Lanie gets to share her early memories of my dating life when she was a little girl and how it impacted her.  Fingers crossed she's not too scarred (ha ha).  

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In this episode, I share several personal stories from my dating life after my first divorce. I was 30-32 years old and my daughter was in pre-K and kindergarten.

• I talk about the mistakes I made when I was like to be young and single. I was insecure and basically introduced myself as damaged goods to men who displayed interest in me.
• I revisit my relationship with “Funcle” in regards to his feelings toward little Lanie. I also reflect on what it was like to try to gauge how she felt about him.
• I tell the story updating “Malibu Ken” and how I totally misjudged his intentions. 
• I had a total panic attack after attempting to spend the holidays with Lanie, a boyfriend, and his children. 
• I explain what it was like in the early stages of dating my ex husband and blending our three girls.

There’s no doubt in my mind the children are the most complicated factor in dating after divorce. For good reason… They are the most important  people in our lives. 

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I'm so excited to share my first holiday themed podcast episode with you! 

I reached out to my listeners to collect their best psycho and ghosting dating stories to create this Halloween show. They totally delivered some great material! 

My girlfriend kicks off the show with her tale of the Ghost of Tulsa, Oklahoma.  

Then, I share a funny psycho first date story that was told to me by a married friend of mine.

I re-tell a psycho dating story from a girlfriend of mine.  A guy she dated turned out to be a bit of a freak in the bedroom and also has a conflicted relationship with Jesus.

A guy I once dated and  lovingly refer to as "Cold Play Chris" shares his story of a 3rd date gone wrong with a psycho ending.

The final story I share is another from my married friend. It is a reminder to us all that we break up with partners for a reason.  Her ex gave her a very clear picture of why they broke up in the first place.

To wrap up the show, my friend & fellow podcaster, Rich Bracken, shares his psycho dating story he named the "Jesus Enchilada Episode".  Yes, it entails another soul whose dating life  is conflicted by her relationship with Jesus.  

Thank you to my friends who took the time to share their dating stories with me! Happy Halloween to all!

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By this point in life, most of us have experienced a friendship breakup or two.  In this episode, I talk about friendships that end because of marriage or divorce, specifically.

I begin by telling the story of my own friendship breakup with three of my oldest childhood friends. Then, I analyze our friendship and look at things from their perspective to share with you what I learned from it. I use my experience to talk about how we can be good friends to people who are in relationships we don't approve of because they are unhappy  or unhealthy.

Then, I share examples of friendship breakups that have been shared with me by listeners and friends.  Unfortunately, losing friends because of marriage and divorce is a common occurrence.  If you're going through something similar, you are not alone.

Lastly, my brave friends shares her personal story of her divorce and ultimate betrayal of her very best friend.

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In this episode I share how I am at a peaceful, content, happy place in life with no romance...I'm good over here.

 In this episode, I focus on three main topics.

1. My experience after going through my first divorce helped me to brace and prepare myself for what I experienced during my second separation and divorce. This is not my first rodeo.  I wasn't surprised that my second divorce wasn't easy, cheap, or quick.   
2. I've spent a lot of time working on self-development and my relationships with loved one. I've gone to therapy off and on for over a decade.  I've read books, researched online, and listened to podcasts.  I think on this stuff a lot. I reflect. I pray. I talk about my interpersonal relationships with friends and family.  I try to learn.  
   • You have a choice. You can isolate yourself, pity yourself, punish yourself, feel guilty, numb yourself, distract yourself... OR you can make healthier choices. DO THE WORK!
   • Use your time doing things and being around people who make you happier and healthier!
3. I had an epiphany! I think I am happier by myself because in my marriages I kept secrets, experienced stress, chaos, manipulation, and lying.  I now have peace and stability on my own. Also, because I've never experienced a mutually loving, supportive, emotionally  healthy relationship I simply don't know what I am missing.  I think recovering from divorce can be harder for those who had relatively happy marriages where they shared a deep love and a balanced because they miss those things. 

Recovering from divorce is a process and everyone's journey is different.  This is just a little piece of mine.

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My friends share their funny dating stories in this episode to entertain you and to remind you that we are ALL in this together! (Yes, I stole the title from the 1996 movie, Swingers.)

It's of important note that my friends from this episode are either still actively dating OR are in a committed relationship with someone they met online.  I love how they all shared their embarrassing stories but each made a strong point to let you know they didn't let these incidents dissuade them from dating.

The show kicks off with my girlfriend sharing a hilarious story of freaking out on a guy while she was in a state of paranoia.  

Secondly, a male friend of mine tells of a very inebriated woman on a first date and then a second catfish story.

Then, another girlfriend shares her story of a first date sleepover gone wrong.

Lastly, I wrap up with some short stories that were sent to me in DMs. 

BIG THANK YOU to my friends for taking the time to record for me and to Alex for compiling three different types of audio for this one! I LOVE my TEAM!

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