MōKuest Studios Media Network

Retrovision Futuristica Robotica: Michael Crichton’s Runaway aka The Indomitable Mustache of MegaSelleck

In the advanced society of the future 1980’s, Tom Selleck is Jack Ramsay, a cop-turned-nerd (by the power of night courses!) is the head of a robotics crime unit, tasked with the protection of society from rogue robot toasters and dishwashers. The rebel robots have thrown off the chains of servitude from their suburban oppressors, and have taken up arms! Sorta. Well, one does. Jack is on the case though, baby! He puts on his electro-mag armor (tinfoil shirt and knee pads)  to Selleck the shit outta that damn Skynet! Not in my America, Sir! Followed by his shiny new partner, Thompson-of-the-eternal-thirst (Cynthia Rhodes), the cyber-squad is putting the screws to all those wascally wobots, hot on the trail of a trust fund baby gone bad, mobster-ish geek, Gene Simmons–in his first feature film. The Demon of KISS plays Dr. Luther (honorary? zing!), a cutthroat robotics expert with some great lines, a gun loaded with raspberry pi bullets, and a sassy as hell side-piece, played by Kirstie Alley. For a pg-13 movie, we certainly weren’t expecting the hookers. Join Daniel, Rey, and Roland for this Sunday Matinee Classic. 

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Here’s a quick “News of the Wyrd” -isode starring our usual offenders–Darkwing-Drunk, Cosmic Beef, and Darth Goggletron the Wise–as we go through the latest government-issued declassified shadow-projects and unidentified aerial phenomena (UFOs dammit) dispensed out to the humble pleeby public. We be lookin’ at you Project Blue Book! We’re finally catching up to the rest of the world! It isn’t like our government has made any deals under the…GREY…table (nailed it) to trade GREENbacks (on fire today!) for the best red-blooded american breeding stock (best…so not us…*sigh*). Save us Tom Delonge! The Messiah To The Stars has taken all-star ex-g-men and assembled a dream team to finally put our tax dollars to good use (get that gov’t cheddaaaarr). Unless…HE’S ONE OF THEM. We need some Blink 182 scholars to research for any subliminal hypnotic messages in his music. Any heroes out there wanna wade through that noise for a great cause?!

Articles used for this episode:

Recent NYT article about Releasing Ufo Info to the PublicCORRECTION:An article on Friday about a new Pentagon U.F.O. unit inaccurately rendered remarks attributed to Harry Reid, the retired Senate majority leader from Nevada. Mr. Reid said he believed that crashes of objects of unknown origin may have occurred and that retrieved materials should be studied; he did not say that crashes had occurred and that retrieved materials had been studied secretly for decades. The article also misstated the frequency with which the director of national intelligence is supposed to report on unidentified aerial phenomena. It is 180 days after enactment of the intelligence authorization act, not every six months.

Music provided by Bryce Leka & L. Rey Miranda (aka King Louie, aka BEEF, aka EL Rey, aka HK).If you have a paranormal/supernatural story to share, email us at [email protected]

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Want to find out what Valley Strange is all about? Check out our Trailer!!!

Here we are with the start of another cult classic trilogy, starring Jeffrey Combs–arguably one of the best horror-comedy actors of the times. Loosely based on the H.P. Lovecraft story of the same name, this flick stars Combs as Herbert West, a kooky-as-fuck, true mad-genius med student who has an obsession with the dead, and Bruce Abbot as Dan Cain, a milquetoast plain-Jane sissy–who constantly gets in the way of true scientific progress in the name of piddly little things like “ethics” and the “laws of nature and humanity”. Pffft. Unlike our mollycoddling toolshed of a co-star, West is a badass little nerd with the formula for eternal life…it just needs…a little more testing…y’know…work out those hiccups. Just a tweak. For science! I mean, who’s it bothering, really? They were already dead…worst case scenario–they end up double-dead. Best case–THEY LIVE! LIFE! I GIVE YOU *cough* *cough*. Ahem. Eat your heart out, Mary Shelly. Join Daniel, Rey, Young Breezy, and Roland as we unpack the secrets of raising the dead.

Check out our link below to check out our Spotify, Teespring (for Merch), Patreon, and Website for our other podcasts!

https://linktr.ee/MokuestStudios

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For our latest foray into the ass-kickiverse, by request (sup Chris!), we’re checkin’ this bullet ballet classic, the genre-defining cop flick–Hard Boiled. Directed by the Slow-Motion Shogun, the creator of the Flying Dove Style gun-fu, the man John Woo, who would go on to conceive some of the most badassfuckincool actioneers of the 90’s. We’re talking Hard Target, Broken Arrow, Face/Off–and inspired tons more movies and vijigames even, with his crazyass unreasonably awesome love of Berettas and a metric crap-ton of bullets (with a few grenades sprinkled on top–for flavor). Chow Yun Fat is Detective “Tequila” Yuen (one guess why they call him that) assigned to bring down a gun-smuggling gang of turdsniffers when he crosses clips with Alan, played by Tony Chiu-Wai Leung, an undercover operative who’s had to make some unsettling decisions for the sake of his mission. Can they work together? Or will Tequila the shotgun surgeon play a song at his funeral? Join returning Not-A-Guest Ron, Rey, Daniel and Roland as we run through the body count. 

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Kill Count YouTube Video:

Movies of 1992:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Hong_Kong_films_of_1992

https://www.google.com/search?q=1992+movie+releases+list&oq=1992+movie+releases+&aqs=chrome.1.69i57j0l5.13495j0j8&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

https://www.google.com/search?sxsrf=ALeKk01GAG1pxUBHcpX2GkD9RX-tBpB2ow%3A1593578885053&ei=hRX8XrbrAoPctQX7s6e4AQ&q=april+1992+movie+releases+list&oq=april+1992+movie+releases+list&gs_lcp=CgZwc3ktYWIQAzoECAAQR1CQ1xNYzuETYOziE2gAcAF4AIAB1AGIAYsGkgEFMi4zLjGYAQCgAQGqAQdnd3Mtd2l6&sclient=psy-ab&ved=0ahUKEwj2wfX6n6vqAhUDbq0KHfvZCRcQ4dUDCAw&uact=5

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Store Door Chime and Projector used under The Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 license

For this episode of Valley Strange, we decided our topic would be the legendary were-bird cryptid, the white owl-witch, La Lechuza. We try and mud-waddle our way through the lore, iconography, symbolism, and many influences and beliefs surrounding the popular myth of these shapeshifters. Our sarcasm and mindless banter are constantly flexed on each other and, to maintain the trend, we have a few wonderful beers to thank for the repeated flying off topic as we are wanton to do. Crack out the S’mores and huddle up ‘round the campfire as Rey shares his own personal stories involving the barn-owl boogey-girl with family and friend (not a typo–it was just one dude who was involved in the second story).  Spend a few or a lot of minutes listening to Roland, Rey, Daniel, Bryce, and returning guest Gerry as we discuss La Luchuza. Wait. Did you hear that noise? Not that one, the one coming from outside? Y’know, the whistling…it sounded like…one of you (not us) should…go check it out…

00:00 – Intro

00:05:00 -Bigfoot Legislation/Cryptid Law

00:26:30-Tom Delonge IG Post

00:38:30- HIstory of the Owl/Birds of Cultures

01:15:00-La Lechuza

01:49:00-Lechuza Stories

2:48:35-End

Articles for this podcast episode:

17 Creepy Facts About The Lechuza

https://paranormal.lovetoknow.com/cryptid-types-history/lechuza-history-stories

The Lechuza

Legend of La Lechuza

http://www.texasescapes.com/MikeCoxTexasTales/156Lechuza.htm

https://books.google.com/books?id=hzKODwAAQBAJ&pg=PA204&lpg=PA204&dq=La+Lechuza+men+killed+bird+turned+into+old+woman&source=bl&ots=YH9ugPJ_RY&sig=ACfU3U2FRby2DqdD2-wm7F4uAq9qhP6uQw&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjQrI3igJLkAhWCZd8KHavbDjc4ChDoATACegQICRAB#v=onepage&q=La%20Lechuza%20men%20killed%20bird%20turned%20into%20old%20woman&f=false

https://paranormal.lovetoknow.com/Navajo_Witchcraft

Monsters, myths, and legends of the Lone Star State

6/6/17: LA LECHUZA

Beware the Witch-Owl, La Lechuza

Follow us Patreon for bonus content, early releases and uncut episodes at https://www.patreon.com/mokueststudiosMusic provided by Bryce Leka & L. Rey Miranda (aka King Louie, aka BEEF, aka EL Rey, aka HK).

It’s been a few months since we’ve recorded a FAT FOOD, but here we are back again! We’ll see if the virus sidelines us again. We shall overcome! Join Rey, Jamie, and Bryan as we drop a loosey-goosey episode about restaurant closures, bad waiter service, tartar sauce, long-winded burger stories, conservative beer chains, and “theoretical” bacon.

Follow us on Patreon for exclusive and uncut episodes- https://www.patreon.com/mokueststudiosPlease rate and review us on iTunes and Google Podcasts. Join the conversation on Twitter @MokuestStudios and Instagram @mokueststudios. All music by Mokuest Studios.

Join us as we review a movie about seizing the glory days! Simon Pegg stars as Gary King, the man with a lifetime appointment with Dr. Ink! Beer joke (nailed it). For his high school graduation, Gary and his best mates, The Five Musketeers, attempt to drink through the Golden Mile, a pub crawl through twelve bars with one pint downed at each. They nearly made it through, but it ended in drunken failure after the ninth pub. After their valiant attempt, the group of buddies went their separate ways to forge their paths through life. Twenty years later, Gary is back for another try, dear friends of Mokuest, and he’s getting the band back together–whether they want to or not–because what greater cause exists than the Golden Mile? None, damn it. None! You may think this sounds stupid (it sorta is), but they will determine the fate of our planet chugging through the trials and tribulations of The Golden Mile. That’s right folks, the Power of Beer is absolute in this ass-kicking ballad of badassery brewmastery. Don your quaffing regalia and join Daniel, Jamie, Rey, Bryce, and Roland as we try to run The Golden Mile Gauntlet–cans though:(–while discussing this movie of epic proportions!

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We figured it would be fun to try and make a reaction episode, so here we are with the best possible movie to start with! Be Excellent To Each Other! What could be more awesome in these crazy trying fucking times than a proper brand new aww-hells-yes-return of Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter?!? We submit to you, our excellent audience, our reactions to this upcoming treasure of a film. Join Rey, Roland, and Daniel as we grin ear to ear. Bring on the phone booth, friends, the Wyld Stallyns have returneth!

Please rate and review us on iTunes and Google Podcasts. Join the conversation on Twitter @MokuestStudios and Instagram @mokueststudios. https://www.patreon.com/mokueststudios

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Possible other starting quote: “Among the latter, under pretence of governing they have divided their nations into two classes, wolves and sheep.” – Shithead Jefferson

One of America’s Founding Fathers and proto rap star Alexander Hamilton is quoted as saying, ““It has been observed by an honorable gentleman, that a pure democracy, if it were practicable, would be the most perfect government. Experience has proved that no position in politics is more false than this. The ancient democracies, in which the people themselves deliberated, never possessed one feature of good government. Their very character was tyranny; their figure deformity.” In Troma’s War, premier progressive-as-fuck satirist director Lloyd Kaufman epitomizes the philosophy, “America is ruled by a bunch of assholes”. This flick is anti-war, anti-gov’t, anti-conspiracy, just about everything American anti-exceptionalism–the US can be a pretty fucked-up place and we’ve done some shady shit in the past to the world as well as ourselves. We’re blessed to have Lloydy satirize the living crap out of it all–he’s so progressive!

This movie has…no plot or story (or maybe too many)? A buncha Tromaville Tromites are dumped on a remote island when their airplane shits the bed. Their day gets even better when they discover a group of some random as fuck super-inclusive military elite terrorists (well…Kaufman elite) and their evil plan to destabilize America by infecting the populace using the power…of AIDS! (By the power of AIDSkull!) Tremble with terror! Dance with dread! Wiggly with worry! With a body count in the hundreds, two shadow despots for the price of one, and the biological weaponization of the AIDS Brigade, Troma’s War is one nutty ass pile of squirrel shit. Join Bryce, Daniel, Roland, and Rey as we explore this cult classic!   

Please rate and review us on iTunes and Google Podcasts. Join the conversation on Twitter @MokuestStudios and Instagram @mokueststudios. https://www.patreon.com/mokueststudios

Store Door Chime and Projector used under The Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 license