Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships

Today we're back with a Q&A episode! We're answering some questions from our listeners and talking about balancing relationships and a burgeoning career, asking a partner to be more visible in their life, and how to reconcile with decisions others make that affect you.

If you want a question of yours answered on one of our future Q&A episodes, consider becoming a member of our community!

Join our amazing community of listeners at ⁠multiamory.com/join and get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community!

Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.

Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by ⁠Josh and Anand⁠

Follow us on Instagram ⁠@Multiamory_Podcast⁠ and visit our website ⁠Multiamory.com⁠.

We are a proud member of the ⁠Pleasure Podcasts⁠ network.

Today we're revisiting the topic of marriage and non-monogamy, talking about why you might want to get married, why you might NOT want to get married, and some considerations you might want to discuss with a partner if you're non-monogamous.

Join our amazing community of listeners at ⁠multiamory.com/join and get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community!

Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.

Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by ⁠Josh and Anand⁠

Follow us on Instagram ⁠@Multiamory_Podcast⁠ and visit our website ⁠Multiamory.com⁠.

We are a proud member of the ⁠Pleasure Podcasts⁠ network.

For today's episode, we're joined by Millie and Nick from Decolonizing Love for a spectacular conversation about polyamory, intersectionality, colonialism, hierarchy, and much, much more.

Millie Boella (she/they) and Nick (he/him) are a polyamorous couple from Toronto, Canada, who have been together for 14 years. Millie, of mixed Kenyan and diverse heritage, has always embraced polyamory, influenced by her Maasai background. She founded the Toronto Non-Monogamous BIPOC group in 2017 and is a professional writer. Nick, of Italian and Greek descent, is a healthcare consultant. He works on various community causes, including projects that help men unlearn toxic masculinity. In 2021, they co-founded Decolonizing Love, advocating for polyamory through a decolonial lens. Their work aims to make polyamory accessible and intersectional.

Join our amazing community of listeners at ⁠multiamory.com/join and get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community!

Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.

Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by ⁠Josh and Anand⁠

Follow us on Instagram ⁠@Multiamory_Podcast⁠ and visit our website ⁠Multiamory.com⁠.

We are a proud member of the ⁠Pleasure Podcasts⁠ network.

For this week's episode, the Multiamory crew is taking a much-needed break, and featuring episode 308 of Normalizing Non-Monogamy: Bru + Mark! Hosts Emma and Fin talk with Bru and Mark about their guests' relatively recent journey of opening up their long partnership.

For Emma and Fin, life is all about seeking out adventure, embracing the chaos, and meeting amazing people along the way. They are in their mid thirties, met in seventh grade, and have been together since their freshman year of college. A year or so into their relationship it was obvious that exploring everything life had to offer was part of who they were as individuals, and as a team. They were very young at the time and neither had really experienced the world of dating, so they created a way to explore aspects of the dating world without ending their relationship, through non-monogamy. Fast forward about 11 years and they decided to start a weekly podcast called Normalizing Non-Monogamy in 2018. They absolutely love meeting new people and hearing their stories and through this podcast they get to interview people from all over the world who are exploring non-monogamy on their own terms. The hope is that if they can get enough of those stories out into the world that it will provide a resource for anyone who is considering non-monogamy. They also want to show that non-monogamy is more common than most people think and that it can be done in an ethical and consensual way. Overall, the mission is to inspire people to embrace their true selves so that, together, we can open minds and live authentically without shame.

Find more about them and Normalizing Non-Monogamy at https://www.normalizingnonmonogamy.com/!

Join our amazing community of listeners at ⁠multiamory.com/join and get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community!

Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.

Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by ⁠Josh and Anand⁠

Follow us on Instagram ⁠@Multiamory_Podcast⁠ and visit our website ⁠Multiamory.com⁠.

We are a proud member of the ⁠Pleasure Podcasts⁠ network.

Welcome to another Q&A episode where we answer some questions posed by our lovely listeners! Today we're discussing different levels of sexual attraction among various partners, what to do when a relationship seems like it's going TOO well, and how to communicate to a partner that you want to shift away from hierarchy.

If you want your question answered on a future episode, consider joining our awesome community at multiamory.com/join!

Join our amazing community of listeners at ⁠multiamory.com/join and get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community!

Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.

Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by ⁠Josh and Anand⁠

Follow us on Instagram ⁠@Multiamory_Podcast⁠ and visit our website ⁠Multiamory.com⁠.

We are a proud member of the ⁠Pleasure Podcasts⁠ network.

Dan Savage joins us today to talk about love, sex, non-monogamy, commitment, and much, much more!

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, a podcaster, an author, and has appeared on numerous television shows.

“Savage Love,” Dan’s sex-advice column, first appeared in The Stranger, Seattle’s alternative weekly, in 1991. The column is now syndicated worldwide. Dan has published seven books.

In 2006, Dan launched the Savage Lovecast, a weekly, call-in, sex advice podcast. It has 600,000 unique monthly downloads and 20,000 paying subscribers for premium “Magnum” content. It ranks consistently in the top ten Sexuality podcasts on Apple Podcasts.

He created and curates the HUMP! Film Festival, a sex-positive showcase of dirty short films, now in its 18th year. HUMP! has become a national phenomenon selling tens of thousands of tickets, screening in over 50 cities across the United States and Canada and streaming worldwide.

In 2010 Dan and his husband Terry Miller founded the It Gets Better Project. The IGBP has gathered tens of thousands of videos from people all over the world offering hope to LGBT kids. The book—It Gets Better: Coming Out, Overcoming Bullying, and Creating a Life Worth Living—was a New York Times best seller. In 2012 the It Gets Better Project was awarded an Emmy.

Dan’s graphic, pragmatic, and humorous advice has changed the cultural conversation about sex, monogamy, gay rights, religiosity, and politics.

Join our amazing community of listeners at ⁠multiamory.com/join and get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community!

Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.

Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by ⁠Josh and Anand⁠

Follow us on Instagram ⁠@Multiamory_Podcast⁠ and visit our website ⁠Multiamory.com⁠.

We are a proud member of the ⁠Pleasure Podcasts⁠ network.

🎉 Big Announcement 🎉

As some of you have already heard, we’re making the big transition from Patreon to Supercast. This move has been 2 years in the making, and we’re so happy that we can finally make the switch in order to make our supporters’ experience even better. Here are the most important things to know about the switch:

We’re now officially sliding scale. That means ✨ ALL benefits for ALL tiers! ✨

Choose the monthly amount that works for your financial reality, get access to everything:

• Private Discord server & FB group

• Ad-free & early-release episodes

• Monthly video discussion and processing groups

• Priority submission for Q&As and AMAs

• Early & discounted live event and workshop access

• Invites to supporter-only pop-ups and in-person hangouts

• Discounts on Dedeker's online course



Additionally, Supercast has enabled us to offer new features including:

🎁 The ability to gift membership (just in time for the holiday season)

💰 One-off donations if you’re not interested in subscribing full time

🆓 Financial assistance options – if you’re having a tighter month, you can fill out our financial accessibility form at any time to get an automated promo code that will unlock reduced or free membership. This is no questions asked, and you can use the form as many times as you need.

More information, FAQs, and sliding scale guidelines at http://www.multiamory.com/join

Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.supercast.com. Get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community!


Whatever you want to learn, MasterClass has something for you, taught by experts in their fields. Support the show and get an exclusive 15% offer at multiamory.link/masterclass.

Skillshare is an online learning community with thousands of classes for creators. Everything from graphic design and video editing to photography, writing, and business. Get a free month of Skilllshare at multiamory.link/skillshare.

Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.
Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by Josh and Anand.
Follow us on Instagram @Multiamory_Podcast and visit our website Multiamory.com.

We are a proud member of the Pleasure Podcasts network.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week we're celebrating 500 episodes of Multiamory! Ten years after the first episode, we're telling the story of the beginning of the podcast, revisiting topics from episode 1, and talking about the exciting future of the show.

Visit multiamory.com/join to become part of our amazing community!

Join our amazing community of listeners at ⁠multiamory.com/join and get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community!

Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.

Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by ⁠Josh and Anand⁠

Follow us on Instagram ⁠@Multiamory_Podcast⁠ and visit our website ⁠Multiamory.com⁠.

We are a proud member of the ⁠Pleasure Podcasts⁠ network.

Today we're joined by writer Andrea Zanin to talk about their upcoming books. Andrea Zanin, MA, is a white, nonbinary, middle-aged queer whose writing focuses on queer sex, nonmonogamy and BDSM/Leather. They have written for the Globe and Mail, The Tyee, Bitch, Ms., Xtra, IN Magazine, Outlooks Magazine and the Montreal Mirror. Their scholarly work, fiction and essays appear in a variety of collections, and they are the author of Post-Nonmonogamy and Beyond and, with Eve Rickert, the co-author of More Than Two, Second Edition: Cultivating Nonmonogamous Relationships with Kindness and Integrity. Andrea blogs sporadically at sexgeek.wordpress.com, where they created the ten rules for happy nonmonogamy and coined the term “polynormativity.”

Join our amazing community of listeners at ⁠multiamory.com/join and get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community!

Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.

Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by ⁠Josh and Anand⁠

Follow us on Instagram ⁠@Multiamory_Podcast⁠ and visit our website ⁠Multiamory.com⁠.

We are a proud member of the ⁠Pleasure Podcasts⁠ network.

Today's episode is another Q&A! We'll be answering Patreon questions about whether or not your first relationship should be a non-monogamous one, dealing with a partner's NRE with someone else, and if it's possible to limit one's expansion of feelings for another.

If you'd like your question answered on a future Q&A episode, consider becoming a member of our Patreon community!

Join our amazing community of listeners at ⁠multiamory.com/join and get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community!

Multiamory was created by Dedeker Winston, Jase Lindgren, and Emily Matlack.

Our theme music is Forms I Know I Did by ⁠Josh and Anand⁠

Follow us on Instagram ⁠@Multiamory_Podcast⁠ and visit our website ⁠Multiamory.com⁠.

We are a proud member of the ⁠Pleasure Podcasts⁠ network.