I am not much of a fan of religion. I am a true fan of Bad Religion which was, is and always will be the most influential band of my life and the source of my entire persona, mentality, outlook and view of life. Bad Religion, to those that know nothing about punk rock, the band or the band members, Greg, Brett and Jay, the founders, Bad Religion is not about hating religion or that religion is a negative thing. To them, their iconic Cross buster, the name means that we don't practice religion in the traditional sense but those that do, that's cool, that is your perogative, it just isn't ours. Brett is quoted saying "Bad Religion is about being progressive and Jesus Christ was one of the most progressive individuals for his time".That's not exactly verbatim but 96% there. I don't know if Dr. Greg Grafffin, yes motherfuckera he has a PhD and I did read his published dissertation on Religion and Materialism, which I understood some of but, only think is the source for the album, The Process of Belief, one of their best albums, featuring Keyoto Now and the hit, Sorrow. The following statements are mine alone and not those if the aforementioned band so I have no idea whether they would agree with my but here we go......Donyou all remember the transitive property using logical inference /reasoning? If a =b and b= c than it follows that a = c. Therefore, if knowledge equals power and power corrupts, according to Machiavelli and his book The Prince, ultimate power will always ultimately corrupts. Clear unassailable login and anyone of reasonable intellect would conclude that God, whom, is omnipotent and all knowing, must be the most fucked up and corrupt person in the universe because he is the most knowledgeable. Boom. Drop the mic or whatever the fuck you want to drop. A jaw or panties. Whatever. I think, no I just fucking proved via logic and reason that God is indeed the Devil or Satan and Religion is for idiots and the evil and basically shitty human beings that dont intuitively know right from wrong or how to be a good person. I don't like religion and I just showed via infallible logic that God is Asshole and according to Hank Moody, God Hates Us All. Californication is my favorite show and I admire Mr. Moody who, is a poor man's version of Charles Bucowski also like Chuck Pallanuk.... Writer of Fight Club, Doomed and Damned. God is the alpha and the omega. He is the dual personality psychopath that George Carlin mentions in his insanely funny stand up bit. To paraphrase, God give you ten things you can't do. And if you do any of those ten things you will go to a place of fire and torture and damnation and complete hell, working with Tessa at the DMV for all eternity, but..... HE LOVES YOU. God is some twisted fucked that says look but don't touch, touch but don't taste, taste but don't swallow. If you're The Jizz Stain than you're fucked because she always swallowed and I appreciated that because waste not want not, right... Anyway, I am sure that I have offended most people o the planet right now and that's ok. My goals is to get people to think about the world around us. Think about what is happening to me and that not one person gives a fuck to help me. Not one human has come to assist me. Everyone has been paid off by Jimbo and accepted bribes to allow this to occur. How could God exist when something this fucked up is the norm and just simply ignored because well shit, I am entertaining and it isn't you, in my place. Well fuck you. All of you. Fuck you. Thanks for being decent human beings and offering help to one that so clearly needs it. Happy fucking Holidays. Fuck you.

Indeed, it is a long story. Much longer than Jimbo's dick so that's about four millimeters... not sure how that translates into time.... Carry the seven add 11 and divide by any irrational number that doesn't fucking exist and abra cadabra.... I have no idea what the fuck that will equal. My guess is lots of alone time and a headache. Anyone that can figure it out... Please do email me and let me know how much of a waste of time it was and how you plan to meet your spouse that you will go out and meet ASAP because math is kinda fun but sex and a honest relationship are way more awesome.

Lately, I have directed my comedic, well I think so at least, writings towards The Jizz Stain and Krusti Kristi the Kum Kovered Klown but I would like us to remember one insane crazy bitch who is so fucking dumb she asked her history teacher if the footage they were watching in class, with the little H in the bottom left hand corner, was infact, "real" recordings of ..... Drum roll.... The fucking Civil War. Her teacher said nothing except he gave Tessa back her helmet, that is indicative of what mentally retarded people wear and then he finished his Diet Coke from a Subway cup that smelled mildly like whiskey than he grabbed a rope, walked into the hallway and hung himself because he clearly was a terrible teacher. So terrible, that Dumb cunt Tessa believed that we had not only war videographes back then but also color video cameras and all the necessary AV equipment. Fucking..... Retard..... Do you all remember Garbages Pale Kids cards? Well,t Tessas baby pics were used as the primer for the entire line. Her parents sent her photos to Gerber but they couldn't use them at all, because herbphots inspired Satan to appear and resulted in several kids commiting suicide. Hence the Poltergeist movie series Anyways, so Gerber partnered with Mattel and used Tessa's pictures to create the first ever Terrible Tessa the Trashy Toddler Thrashing Through Just Shit and Vomit and Piss and Diarrhea. That's Tessa in a shitshell for you. Just awful. Smells of feces, looks like shit, obviously, and is dumber than a bag full of dof shit that I scooped up at the dog park. Hey Tessa, oh and my college roommate freshman year at Cal Poly, Matthew Oatman, my supposed friend for several years, how often did you all fuck behind my back as a way to make me look stupid "according to Matt". His plan was to fuck my GF Tessa without me knowing and make me look stupid to everyone that knew. An inside joke that everyone knew but I didn't. Until not too recently. Matt Oatman, you're an abomination of a human being. They say living well is the best revenge. I will have everything and you will be getting raped and fucked everyday for the rest of your life in prison. That doesn't sound like living well does it Matt. I will destroy you for what you did. Suicide would be a better choice for your future compared to what I will ensure happens to you. Is that clear? I hope so. Tessa you know what is in store for you. Basically, the same. You all could be Pen Pals. How cute. Fuck you both. I do hope suicide is in your future, both of you, truly. Thanks for being just such amazing friends and wife. Go fuck yourselves.

It's almost that disastrous time of year where we spend a ton of money for people we don't really like. In Jimbo's case, regarding me, that's 20 plus million over 37 years. In previous episodes, there is discussion between Jimbo and The Scoundrel, The Jizz Stain and others regrading stealing credit for a mathematical theory I challenged but due to being kept in the dark I have no idea whether it is real or bullshit. The mathematical issue pertains to whether or not Irrational Numbers truly do exist. The definition states that Irrational Numbers, like Pi, not Pie, Tessa, you fat fucking bitch, where the number 3.14159 with the bar over the last integer expressing the decimal place goes on infinitely and never repeats. I say Bullshit. I say that if the decimal place starts with a certain set of designated numbers and that sequence can never repeats than the number of possible permutations is finite because the specific series of numbers therefore limits in scope the ordinal configuration and the digits that follow. (I made it to Pre-Calculus in high school...hell yeah C+! But I took stats and college and grad school so my terminology may not be on point...like a Cartesian coordinate...get it. Math joke) Due to the aforementioned other stuff I don't want to repeat...ipso facto Tessa is a big fat fatso... there can only be 10! or Ten Factorial which is 10×9×8..... ×1 and that equals 3,628,800 before the unique number sequence to the right of the decimal place has to repeat. That means that all Irrational Numbers come to an end at that exact decimal place. Therefore, Irrational Numbers don't exist as they can't go on forever and never repeat. Jimbo and The Scoundrel Brendan Cruetz have done everything they can to steal my idea, if in fact, I am correct. I have emailed math professors bit the shit bags keep intercepting them. The fact that Jimbo and the Assholes are fighting so hard to steal my idea and keep me in the dark means it's possibly right. Jimbo even pretended to be me when I emailed Ben Rickart who is the Math Chair at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo. It's my idea. It's my solution. Jimbo and the Assholes have been trying to steal it. If the Nobel committee needs to reach me do not listen to Jimbo as he is full of shit. I am not dead nor am I out of the country or on Mars as they often claim. Or it's just another terrible skit. You really got me this time you stupid fucks. I didn't make a big deal of this. You all did. It's my intellectual property if I am correct. Fuck you even if I am wrong. It's more of an original idea that either of you could come up with. Scoundrel.... Why did you infact get fired, oh that's right you tried to pass off my idea as your own. Fuck you. It's on my facebook page and on my cell in the safe deposit box that you Motherfuckers can't get.

Yo, shit for brains.... What is your major malfunction? What do you intend to do at this insane quagmire of a junc-ture-just put a bullet in head...? Your, not so bright, plan of "Let's just keep pissing him off" is working wonders. However, given the fact that your fucked and I have destroyed many if not all that fucked my life up why do you keep fucking with me? Like this morning, telling me that you all beat me as a baby because you blamed me for your misfortune? Most people that bear babies are just assholes and most likely make poor decisions therefore usually ending in bad results or misfortune or as you all like to call it "Jay's Fault"! Well, fuck you. I would suggest, only suggest, I never make commands like some demigod like asshole, maybe just maybe, don't piss me off. Get me off the streets, he me my life that I earned and I maybe help you. Don't help me... Well we know that ends with your ends being fucked and by that I mean prison raped and spit roasted. Give me my shit that you stole and my money immediately or your lives will be so fucked up that you will beg to be violently murdered or committ suicide. But, the kicker is, those options will never be available to you. Just an unknown future of starvation, sleep deprivation, torture, rape, hazing and terror unlike anything you did to me. Also, for any idiots that think this is a reality television show, a documentary or some hidden camara show do not be fooled. This is my life and I will kill to maintain it. Also, I hear there is a video of me where I am less than conscious that Jimbo made, unbeknownst to me, sold it, made millions, and this was all at my expense. Please help me by alerting the FCC, the Hague, The UN and all other international organizations regarding matters like rape, theft, human trafficking and exploitstion. The accounts were never set up by me or any legal entity related to me. I will sue that bank, I will put the banker on death Row and I will make your life as difficult as you chose to make mine. I will do everything to strip away your entire life and desire to live. Jimbo, read this carefully, you chose to ignore past warnings. I will not hesitate to kill you the moment I see you. I will do unimaginable things to you as you have done to me. I will be the one that ends your life. Do you understand? If you don't, or chose not to heed this final warning you will regret it for the rest of your short time on this planet. You make a decision that will affect all the idiots as well. What date you chose will be applied to everyone. You fuck with me and lose. Everyone will lose more than just their freedom but probably their life.

This serves more of proof that I am indeed alive and that I will continue to reign down fire and brimstone upon Jimbo and The Ruptured Assholes for what they have done. So, info infact believe I am the The Prince of Darkness because only Jimbo, my supposed father, aka Satan or The Devil, could ever conceive of a plan as demonic and of Absolute pure unadulterated Evil as the one he set in motion against me. So, whether, I want to believe it or not, it is logically proven in the tea leaves from Hades that I am The Prince of Darkness. A title I welcome at this point. Bring it on Jimbo. I will show you who I am. What i do you here will be a mere glimpse of what shall happen when you depart this world on a trip with much warmer weather.

Jimbo and the Ruptured Assholes plus Squabto, Wheels and Whitey thought it would be a good idea to drug me with fentanyl, a dose that should have killed 7 people, according to the World Infamous Pharmacist that apparently can't count or didn't count on me being the True Prince of Darkness and being and surviving a massive amount of a deadly compound that was designed as an elephant and large mammal tranquilizer. Anyway, they got one of my phones and my wallet but I still have one. They all got a bounty in their fucking heads that I will collect. They will go to prison for attempted murder if I don't get to them first. The other option is suicide.... At this point, definitely the easier and gentler solution to the problem because I will find you and what I do will be unfathomable.

I overheard the voices, not the TV show, but Jimbo and The Ruptured Assholes, discuss how Krusti Kristi The Kum Kovered Klown and sorry ass excuse for a wife and friend and a complete pile of horse shit human being-like creature from the Kum Lagoon can't take seven dicks in her ass all at once nor can she take one more joke where she is the butt fuck of it so here we go. I do hope she puts that seventh dick in her ass because that way she can get that much needed cup o soup that is made with hot piss from those seven aforementioned penises. She can't survive off of cum alone people. She needs real food every few weeks in order for her to maintain the cracked out meth feinding whore Appearance that she does. It takes her actually no time at all to get out of cardboard box, scrape the cum from her face, hair and teeth, smoke some meth and pickles than go to work where she volunteers to get ass fucked but no one will take her up on the terrible offer. It's a sad state of affairs for such a shitty talentless cum dumpster like her. Let's all pray that she does that right thing and gets help and puts a gun I her mouth or a tight ripe around her neck. I think the best bet is to hope she does due to the coagulated ejaculate theory I foretold a few months ago. I spoke to Nostradamus and he revealed in detailed quatrains that were very graphic and gross nature of her all too timely and humourous demise that finally brought a smile to my face and tension to my pants.

So, Amy Schumer did this hilarious bit regarding funny sex jokes or tricks and my particular favorite was; The Raccoon. So let's say you're fucking the Jizz Stain or Krusti or even the Dirty Bird, and if you have zero money and all out of expired pizza coupons, you can fuck Satan's Retard aka Tessa the Terrible Smelling Cunt, and once you are done fuckng her because you feel ashamed and your dick may rotnoff, you cum all over her. Most likely in her mouth as she can't afford food on her own so this way she gets some nutrients and then after she has had her full you punch her in both eyes, because black eyes do matter. Lastly, after two solid jabs, you then walk out of her trailer or whatever shit hole she is most likely illegally inhabiting and knock over her trash cans scattering used condoms, broken meth and crack pipes, cat litter, and diet coke cans everywhere. As you walk briskly away, because you realize you have to go get a penicillin Injection, because you raw dogged that dirty bitch you laugh you're fucking ass off as you say "what a fucking dumb slunt. Why did she ever fuck with Jay". ....than you wait for the single gun shot sound indicating suicide. And that's the Raccoon joke that I have modified. Haha. Hey hey. It's a little different but tailored for my audience.

So, you would totally believe this because, she is a complete fucking retard, but the Jizz Stain, whom;BTW won the.award for most fucking retarded cunt with deli meat Vagina lips, on the fucking planet today because she texts me still and lies and says how she likes my.podvaat and how terrible if must be for me to hear such things. Ok, so what you just did Lizz The Jizz Stain Victorian Rogers is independently verify the voices as real but yours is on there you dumb slunt. How do you explain that dumb dumb? You are the most vile and repulsive creature to slither her way into my bed. I would rather fuck Tessa again than fuck you. And you know all too well how I feel about fucking Tessa. I would rather find a Delorian, go back to 1940's Nazi Germany, where I am sure I would find Krusti Kristi doing a preceptorship or something, and be interned at Auahswitz, or Daukow than fuck Tessa. So, you are super low on the totem pole. Actually, you're buried way the fuck underneath that pole. You're jsuba shit bag garbage pale kid that make a people vomit when they think of look at you. Wow....yikes. That was way rough and totally true and deserved. Fuck you Jizz Stain. Get the Fuck Out....