I'm just happy to be alive after a whirlwind birthday weekend that included buzzin around mountains in a Helicopter for the first time.

I try to save a kid from staring at the sun when I was 7, while also recapping how insane it is to hitchhike.

We discuss the incredible legacy of Chamillionaire and Soulja boy, not to mention Dyson vacuums and if girls went bald.

My ongoing dry lips spark curiosity about medical issues adults no longer usually have to deal with such as Nose Bleeds, Pink Eye and the grand daddy of them all, Head Lice.

We reminisce on how cool Hollister and Abercrombie clothes were back in the day, which reminds us of the newest Karen freak out video.

Most of us aren't ready for the Jelly, not to mention Demi Lovato going after FroYo in one of the weirdest beefs of all time.

Todays topic is People Who Text Back Too Quick, we also discuss my near miss becoming a forrest fire hero.

We discuss how hard humans would crush in a global competition and how the news desires to tear us apart.

With the moon AND mercury in retrograde, how do we not lose ours minds?

Chris Gordon is a professional Stand Up comedian who has been featured on Last Comic Standing, Just for Laughs and was #1 pick in Canada on CBC's "So You Think You Are Funny".