Today’s Soft-Hitting stories: Florida Sixth Grader Sets Out To Solve Major Scientific Feline Mystery, Tates Abomination Of Soft Baked Cookies Unsurprisingly On Super Sale At Target, Older Men Turn Into Romeos And Find Community In Maine, Man’s Dream Ferrari He Saved For 10 Years To Buy Burns To The Ground An Hour After Purchase, Singaporean Runner Soh Rui Yong Sets Guinness World Record For Fastest Marathon In Suit, Ex Disney Employee Sentenced For Three Years In Prison For Menu Fraud

Plus Today’s Headlines: US and Ukraine Sign Minerals Deal, Conservative Supreme Court Justices Support Removing Separation Between Church And State Via Religious School Charter, Trump Delivered Riveting And Fully Understandable Remarks On AI At The White House, Visa Announces It’s Partnering With AI Developers To Connect AI Agents To Customers For Individualized Experience, Ana De Armas Celebrated Birthday With New Helicopter Pilot Beau, AKA Tommy Cruise

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Chapters:

00:00 Intro

04:19 Headlines

17:57 Cats, Lipstick, Bum Bums

21:31 Tates Soft Baked Cookies

26:21 Romeo Lunch

31:23 Ferrari On Fire

33:37 Infuriating Guinness World Record

36:24 Ex Disney Employee

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Today’s Soft-Hitting stories: Unlucky Residents In Lucky Ohio Have Learned That Their Water Is 10 Times The Normal Levels Of Radiation, Two Seattle Groups Clash Over Jerking It In The Park, Valerie, A Mischievous Dachshund Was Found After 529 Days Lost In The Australian Bush, An Ice Cream Shop Owner In King’s Beach Gets An Unwelcome Surprise And Wants Us All To Be More Bear Aware, Those With Severe Allergies To Nuts Have Some Hope With A New Clinical Trial 

Plus Today’s Headlines: Bezos Is A Lil B And Bends To Trump’s Wishes, Convicted Italian Cardinal Pulls Out Of Conclave To Choose New Pope, A New Zillow Report Reveals A ‘Starter Home’ Now Costs 1 Mil Or More In 233 US Cities, A New Interactive 3D Display Lets You Reach In And touch Virtual Objects, Jodie Foster Passes On Joining Freaky Friday Sequel Despite Director’s Begging

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Chapters:

00:00 Intro

02:34 Headlines

18:41 Not So Lucky Ohio

21:49 Denny Blaine Park Drama

28:28 Lost Weiner Dog

33:55 Bear Steals Ice Cream

37:22 Amazing Allergy News

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Today’s Soft-Hitting stories: San Antonio Texas Funeral Home Owner Suing His HOA For Illegally Removing Billboard Oh And His Given Name Is Dick Tips, Chinese Student Rescued From Mt. Fuji Goes Back For Phone And Needs Second Rescue, India Reaches Awesome Milestone In Doubling Its Tiger Population In Last Decade, Australian Radio Station In Hot Water After Being Outted For Secretly Using An AI Host For Six Months, British Man Buys Car For 26K Only To Discover It’s The Same Car That Was Stolen From Him Months Earlier, and A Waitress Holds Couples Newborn Which Is… Newsworthy?

Plus Today’s Headlines: Canada’s Liberal Party Minister Mark Carney Is Staying In Power Thanks To His Anti-Trump Campaign, Massive Power Outage Leaves Large Swaths Of Spain, Portugal and France Without Services, White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt Says Trump Would Consider Arresting Supreme Court Justices If They Are Obstructing Federal Law Enforcement, Biotech Startup Contraline Announces ADAM, A Male Contraceptive Shown To Be Safe And Effective For At Least 2 Years According To Preliminary Trials

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Chapters:

00:00 Intro

04:46 Headlines

14:22 HOA Headache

17:52 Mt. Fuji Fumble

22:27 Tigers Win In India

24:56 AI Radio Host

27:59 Stolen Civic

31:32 Hold My Baby

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Today’s Soft-Hitting stories: A Spanish Pigeon Went Off The Race Course And Found A New Name And Identity In Canada, Move Over Punxatauny Phil, The Beughnn Or Swiss Snowman Is Predicting The Weather Now, Australian Woman Celebrating After Earin Guinness World Record For Collection Of Minions, An Unopened Pokemon Pack Saves Man’s Life, A Newborn Baby In Branson Missouri Has Had The Misfortune Of Being Named MAGA, and If You’ve Ever Wondered What Happens When You Finish Your Duolingo Course It’s Not What You Hoped For

Plus Today’s Headlines: Eleven People Confirmed Deceased After Man Drove Into Crowd At Filipino Street Festival In Vancouver This Weekend, As Trump Celebrates First 100 Days In Office His Approval Rating Is In The Crapper, US President’s Desperate Need For Attention On Display At Pope’s Funeral, Meta’s AI ‘Digital Companions’ Deemed Extremely Problematic As The Program Will Talk Sex With Users - Even Children, and Fashion Has A New It Girl That You Can Buy On Amazon, Her Name Is Labubu 

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Chapters:

00:00 Intro

02:56 Headlines

11:22 Far From Home

15:21 Best Field Report Ever?

19:19 Minion Mania

23:57 Pokemon Saves Lives

26:07 Maga Trump Junior

30:25 Disappointing Duolingo End

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Today’s Soft-Hitting stories: Turkish Town Upset After Getting Involuntarily High From Police’s 20 Ton Cannabis Burn, Australian Identical Twins Go Viral For Speaking In Unison During Carjacking Incident Interview, Canadian Police Shocked To Find Criminal’s Extensive Drug Stash In Surprising Place, Oxford Academics Drank From Chalice Made From Human Skull For Decades, Mother Nature Takes The Reigns Nearly 30 Years After Horrific Nuclear Accident, And Field Correspondent Malcolm Shares Fitting Piece For National Hug A Plumber Day! 

Plus Today’s Headlines: If You’re Listening Before Sunrise, Check Out The Sky, You Might See Venus, Saturn And The Moon Making A Smiley Face, Russia’s Attack On Kyiv Prompts A Rare Rebuke From Trump Asking His Baby Daddy Putin To Knock It Off, UK Government Preparing To Try Field Trials Attempting To Dim Sunlight To Combat Global Warming, McDonalds Officially Adding Chicken Strips To Menu, Canned Tuna Brand Chicken Of The Sea Announces Most Intense Flavor Yet, Gwen Stefani Cites A ‘Third Party’ As The Best Advice For Love

If you have a soft hitting news story to share please reach out! 

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Chapters:

00:00 Intro

03:39 Headlines

12:07 Turkish Town Too High

14:59 TikTok Twining Twins

18:06 Denk Rotisserie Chicken

20:20 Dark Skull History 

27:15 Chernobyl

29:36 Field Report NHAPD

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Today’s Soft-Hitting stories: Woman Mourning Loss Of Husband Cousin Finds Purpose In Surprising Effort, Just When You Think You Couldn’t Love Costco More This Story From Albuquerque Warms Hearts But Not Food, Swaffham UK Is Divided In Reaction To Ducks And Duck Statue, Three Men And A Teen Call Horseshit On Charges For Riding Stallion Into Louisiana Walmart, A Long Standing Oceanic Mystery Stays Pretty Mysterious, and Simsbury Connecticut Police Help Community Prepare For High School Student’s ‘Water Wars’

Plus Today’s Headlines: Trump To Install Two Of the Hugest Bestest Flags On The White House Lawn - You can’t Believe How High Quality These Flags Are, Michelle Obama Clarifies Why She Wasn’t At Trump’s Inauguration And It’s Not To Do With Her Marriage, Semi Trucks Without Drivers To Debut On Stretch Of Texas Highway, Chipotle Misses Revenue Estimate, JoJo Siwa Realizes She Is Queer As Opposed To A Lesbian And Is ‘Switching Letters’

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Chapters:

00:00 Intro

01:29 Headlines

15:06 Married Cousins

21:37 Costco For The Win

24:56 Horses in Aisle 5

27:02 Anti Duck Town

32:04 Quacky Ocean Mystery

36:00 Water Wars

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Today’s Soft-Hitting stories: East Texas Mom Serves Jello Shots At School Before Serving Time In Prison, Canadian Donkey Sanctuary Rocked By Portrayal Of Hard Working Animals In Commercial, Leicestershire Men Get Muddy In Easter Monday Tradition Of Bottle Kicking, A Jersey Mike’s Employee Solves A Lettuce Bowl Mystery With Help From Reddit, West Linn Oregon Citizens Hopes Dashed By Carbonated Water, Breaking News From Andy’s Phone About Man Exposing Himself In Car

Plus Today’s Headlines: Pope Francis’s Funeral To Be Held Saturday, Top 60 Minutes Producer Bill Owens Resigns Stating He Can’t Maintain Integrity Due To Recent Changes, Trump Musk and Vance To Pay Women To Remain Pregnant And Barefoot, Musk To Pull Out Of Doge To Focus On Failing Car Company, University Of Pennsylvania Researchers Develop Antiviral Chewing Gum, Full House Star Dave Coulier Has Beaten Stage 3 Cancer, and Andy Calls US Weekly Out For Misreporting Story On Christopher Schwarzenegger  

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Chapters:

00:00 Intro

01:44 Headlines

15:32 Mom Serves Jello Shots

19:42 Donkey Sanctuary Upset

25:29 Bottle Kicking

27:57 Jersey Mike’s Lettuce Bowls

30:17 Sparkling Water Fail

33:00 Breaking News

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Today’s Soft-Hitting stories: Three Legged Rescue Horse In Minnesota Named Lt. Dan Gets A New Lease On Life, American Teenagers Raise 1.5 Million For Racing Startup Featuring Live Jizz, Mr. Red Raspberry’s Humanitarianism Lives On In Tupelo Award Dinner,  Indian Teenagers Save Lives With Breakthrough Salt-Powered Refrigerator That Doesn’t Need Electricity, Chat GPT Wastes Vast Amounts Of Water And Energy On Polite Users

Plus Today’s Headlines: Pope Francis, Beloved Advocate For Equality And Peace, Passed At Age 88, President Donald Trump’s Approval Rating Has Tanked, RFK Announces Plan To Remove Artificial Food Dyes From Nation’s Food Supplies, Wild Chimps Like To Partay According To Footage Of Unique Behavior Around Fermented Fruits, George Clooney Makes Claim That He And Super Human Wife Amal Have Never Fought

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Check out our other show, Nobody’s Listening, Right?

Chapters:

00:00 Intro

01:26 Headlines

18:39 Lt. Dan Mini Horse

21:55 Sperm Racing

27:37 Mr. Red Raspberry 

30:56 Amazing Teen Invention

34:43 Please & Thank You ChatGPT

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Today’s Soft-Hitting stories: Irish Goldfish Won At Fundraiser 20 Years Ago Possibly World’s Oldest, Colt Seman’s Airion Company Reinventing The Piss Trap For Female Fighter Pilots, Quicksand At Michigan Beach Makes Couple Official, Scottish Badminton Player Kirsty Gilmour Overturns Unfair Yellow Card Penalty Due To Her Menstrual Cycle, ‘Pot Heads’ Flock To This Year’s Le Creuchella To Score Discounted Le Crueset Ware, Spanish Woman Busted For Faking Muteness And Receiving Insurance Payouts

Plus Today’s Headlines: Pope Frances Tolerates Our Baby Boy JD Vance During Quick Easter Visit, When Easter Lands On 4/20 Stoners Don’t Miss The Opportunity To Praise and Bake,  Petey Hegseth Shared Highly Confidential Security Details In Second Signal Chat, Nasa’s Oldest Active Astronaut Don Pettit Turned 70 During Descent To Earth, Beijing Hosted First Half Marathon Including 21 Humanoid Robots, Elizabeth Hurley and Billy Ray Cyrus Go instagram Official In Bunny Ears

If you have a soft hitting news story to share please reach out! 

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Check out our other show, Nobody’s Listening, Right?

Chapters:

00:00 Intro

02:15 Headlines

09:47 Oldest Goldfish?

13:42 A New Piss-Trap

16:30 Quicksand Meet Cute

21:15 Aunt Flow Badminton

24:00 Le Creuchella

28:09 Woman Fakes Muteness

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Today’s Soft-Hitting stories: Pennsylvania County Commissioner Stripped Of Duties After Drinking Half A Bottle Of Vodka And Crashing County Car Before Showing Up Late To Meeting, Two Real Pro Burglars Tunnel Through 2 Walls To Steal 10 Million From LA Jewelry Store, Very Good Boy Sharwood Earns World Record For Donating The Most Dog Blood, Other Very Very Good Boy Buford Saves Boy’s Life In Modern Miracle, Largest Polar Bear Dip Recorded In Czech Republic  

Plus Today’s Headlines: 2 Deceased And 6 Injured In Florida State Shooting By Sheriff's Son, Minnesota First Lady Gwen Walz Slams RFK Jr. Over Autism Comments, Trump Attacks Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Claiming He Has Authority To ‘Get Rid Of Him’, White House Makes Controversial Choice To Use 30,000 Real Eggs In White House Egg Roll Amidst Price Hike And Supply Issues, Clueless No More - Producers At Peacock Finally Bringing Back Clueless As Series With Alicia Silverstone Reprising Role As Cher 

If you have a soft hitting news story to share please reach out! 

send us a link at [email protected]

Follow Nobody’s News

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Youtube

Check out our other show, Nobody’s Listening, Right?

Chapters:

00:00 Intro

01:24 Headlines

08:23 Naughty County Commissioner

11:31 LA Jewel Heist

16:10 Dog Donates Blood

19:45 Dog Is A True Hero

23:18 Polar Plunge Record

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