Okay, Now What? - With Kate Gladdin

The day this episode comes out, my dear dad, Vince, turns 70! So to celebrate the big milestone, I've dedicated this episode to Dad and 7 lessons I've learned from him that have shaped me to become the woman I am today.

I love you, Dad.

Pedestrian safety ruffles more feathers online than almost anything else I talk about. Who knew?

Most of the comments on my advocacy posts are beautiful. Some stop me cold. And my first instinct is not calm, graceful or enlightened. It's to crack my knuckles, open my notes app and write a three-chapter rebuttal, complete with an appendix.

Maybe you know that feeling. Maybe it's not a comment section for you, but a partner, a parent, a boss, or your sister-in-law at Christmas. Someone says something that gets right under your skin, and suddenly you're in a tug of war that nobody wins.

In this episode, I share:

• The mistake I made for years in my travel safety work, and why having the facts on my side never changed a single mind
• What the research says actually does shift people's thinking (hint: it's not a better argument)
• Three phrases I use, from gentlest to firmest, so I can stay true to what I believe without people-pleasing or picking a fight
• The one phrase I refuse to say when a comment feels like it's about my mum, and what I say instead
• A simple image from therapy that has saved me hours of wasted energy (and a few late nights in the comment section)

Plus, an update on my dad and his very strong opinions about phones.

If you're tired of either biting your tongue or burning yourself out trying to win, this one's for you.

Want to turn your story into something bigger? If there's something you've been through that you want to build from, like a talk, a book, a podcast, a nonprofit or a cause, book a free 30-minute Direction Call. You'll leave knowing what's been stopping you and your next step, whether we work together or not. → kategladdin.com/coaching

Bring this to your team or event. I speak to organisations and conferences about resilience that goes beyond forced positivity, with practical tools for real challenges at work and in life. → kategladdin.com/speaking

Tell me which phrase you try this week. I'm on Instagram at @kategladdin

I've had a last minute speaking gig come up, so this episode is short yet heartfelt as I share a passage I recently read that puts into perspective what being 'rich' really means. ❤️

To learn more about how I can speak at your next event visit: https://www.kategladdin.com/speaking

Everyone tells you to think big. Set the goals, picture the future, dream about where you'll be in five years. Most of the time, that's great advice.

But when something sudden and painful knocks the ground out from under you, that same advice can be exactly what makes it feel impossible to breathe.

In this episode, Kate shares the simple shift that's helped her through some of her hardest days. It's not forced positivity, and it doesn't ask you to pretend it doesn't hurt.

You'll hear:

• The everyday object that explains why your brain feels so scrambled when life falls apart
• Why a 50/50 chance of pain is more stressful than knowing it's definitely coming
• The prisoner of war who said the optimists were the ones who didn't make it out
• Why "the rest of my life" might be the heaviest phrase you can say to yourself right now
• The question to ask when you don't feel strong enough to face the day

If you're in the thick of something hard right now, this one's for you. And if you know someone who is, please send it their way.

Ready to explore what you might build from what you've lived through? Book your free Direction Call: kategladdin.com/coaching

Does your workplace, conference or organisation bring in speakers? My brand-new speaker reel is live! Watch it and share it with whoever books your events: kategladdin.com/speaker-reel

There are three words most of us say every single day without noticing.

They're small. Polite. They sound like humility. They sound like consideration. One of them sounds so much like good manners that you'd feel rude leaving it out.

And every time you use them, you hand over a little bit of ground.

Not dramatically. Nobody's life falls apart over one sentence. But language is rehearsal — and the things you say on repeat teach your brain what role you believe you're allowed to play. Say them for long enough and you stop being the woman in the room with an idea. You become the woman hoping nobody minds that she's there.

In this episode, I name the three words, unpack where each one actually comes from — usually somewhere genuinely kind — and give you the swap for each, so you're not left knowing what's wrong with no idea what to say instead.

Because this isn't about policing your vocabulary or never apologising again. A real apology matters enormously. But there's a difference between taking responsibility and apologising for taking up space.

In this episode:

• The three words to start listening for — and why the first one is the hardest to give up
• How care quietly turns into self-abandonment in a very polite outfit
• The word that asks a room not to take you seriously before you've finished your sentence
• What the third word is really protecting you from (it isn't uncertainty)
• My one-week experiment for catching all three — without spiralling about it
• Why confidence usually turns up after you speak, not before

You can be kind without disappearing. You can be humble without minimising your value.

But nobody can honour a boundary they can't hear.

Ready to stop making yourself smaller than the life that's calling you?

If there's something you've been through that changed you — and part of you knows you want to build something meaningful from it, but you keep overthinking whether you're qualified enough to start — I'd love to help.

Book a free 30-minute Direction Call with me.

It's not a vague "let's connect" chat, and it's not a sales call. It's a working session: what you want to build, what's been keeping you stuck, and one real next step you can take.

Schedule your call here: kategladdin.com/coaching

There's an old fable I heard again recently about a water bearer and two clay pots. One is perfect. The other has a crack in it, and leaks half its water on the walk home every single day — for two years.

Simple little story. But there's a line near the end of it that quietly dismantles most of the advice we get handed when life goes sideways.

Because "look for the good in it" assumes the good is already there. Hiding. Waiting for you to be observant enough to spot it. So you go looking, and you come back with nothing, and now you feel like you've failed a test on top of everything else.

This episode is about what the water bearer did instead - and why it's a completely different question to the one most of us have been taught to ask.

Also featuring: my neighbour Kevin, a runaway dog, and a farm gate that very nearly took me out. Turbulent episode. Wouldn't have it any other way.

If you've been sitting on something you want to build from what you've been through - a podcast, a book, a speaking career, a nonprofit, a thing that just won't leave you alone - I offer free 30-minute Direction Calls. A working session with a real outcome. You'll leave knowing exactly what's been stopping you and your one next step this week, whether we work together or not.

Book yours at kategladdin.com/coaching

Go looking for help with how you're feeling and it's all the same promise: get rid of the anxiety. Stop the overthinking. Build the confidence. Find the motivation.

Sit with what that's actually teaching us - that the feeling is the problem. That something's gone wrong. That you have to fix yourself before you're allowed to get on with your life.

I don't think that's true. And I think believing it is costing us a lot.

Because the nerves before the presentation? The overwhelm when your boss is away and you're carrying double? The complete absence of desire to get out of a warm bed and go to the gym? None of that is a sign you're broken. It's a brain doing exactly what it was built to do.

What actually creates the problem is the second layer — the judging, the resisting, the story you build on top. I should be past this. Everyone else copes better. I'm just not disciplined enough. That's where the spiral lives. Not in the feeling.

In this episode I'm sharing the four words I've been saying to myself for years without ever realising it, and the question I ask straight after — the one that gets you moving without waiting to feel ready.

It won't make the nerves disappear. It's not meant to.

Come for the reframe. Stay for the bit about my massage chair.

Stuck circling something you want to build — or just stuck full stop? I do free 30-minute Direction Calls. Bring me the thing you keep going round in circles on and we'll work out what's really in the way. → kategladdin.com/coaching

Jay Abasi spent over a year preparing for his TEDx talk. He walked on stage, delivered it, and the crowd loved every second of it.

Then came the part nobody plans for.

In this episode, Jay takes us back to the night everything changed — and the hour he spent on his office floor the next day, not reframing, not positive-thinking his way out of it, just sitting with it. From there, we talk about why the need to win drains your power, what high performers get wrong about detachment, and the three things Jay reckons we all need to get better at tolerating (one of them might surprise you).

We also go back to 2014 — the phone call that changed the entire trajectory of Jay's life — and what it actually takes to move toward something meaningful after loss, instead of away from it.

This one's for anyone who's ever put everything into something and had it not go the way they expected. Connect with Jay on Linkedin, Instagram or learn more on his website: https://jayabbasi.me/

Ready to stop waiting for later?

That's exactly what a Direction Call is for. Thirty minutes, free, no pitch. You'll leave knowing what's actually been stopping you and the one step to take this week.

Book yours → kategladdin.com/coaching

Confidence has become the thing everyone's waiting for to deliver their 'dream' life.

Once I'm more confident, I'll launch it. Once I'm more confident, I'll speak up. Once I'm more confident, I'll apply, I'll move, I'll ask.

And so we wait...

Here's the problem with confidence - it's fragile. It goes up when things go well and falls flat the second they don't. Which means the one time you need it most is the exact moment it abandons you.

In this episode I'm sharing three qualities I think are wildly underrated - and far better to build your life on than confidence. They're not feelings you have to wait for. They're choices you can make right now, today, before you've achieved a single thing or proven you're any good at it.

I'll walk you through what each one actually means (the first one especially - most people get it completely wrong), why they work hardest precisely when things are going badly, and the one question that unlocks each of them in the moment you need it.

I also tell you about the time I walked on stage having realised something about my lapel mic that I'd very much prefer to forget. You'll cringe. I've made peace with it.

In this episode: — Why "once I'm more confident" is the sentence keeping you stuck — The quality most people mistake for playing small (it's the opposite) — How to survive something going badly without it meaning anything about you — The two answers you have to every important question — and why you only ever say one out loud — What's really sitting underneath "I don't know" (in ten years of coaching, it's almost always one of four things) — Take yourself less seriously. Take your life more seriously.

If something stirred while you were listening — a whisper of what you actually want, and the reason you've been telling yourself you can't go after it yet — let's talk about it.

I open a limited number of free 30-minute Direction Calls each week. It's not a sales call. It's a working session, just you and me, and you'll leave knowing what's actually been stopping you and the one next step to take.

Book yours: kategladdin.com/coaching

Nobody likes being wrong. It feels like losing. So we defend our thoughts - even the ones quietly costing us the most.

In this episode I'm making the case that your willingness to be wrong is one of the most underrated skills you can build. Not positive thinking. Not slapping a nice feeling on top of a real fear. Something far more useful - and far more accurate.

I share the thought that nearly stopped this podcast from existing at all, what the research says about how badly we predict our own futures, and the one line you can say back to your brain when it hands you a worst-case scenario.

Plus a small experiment to run this week. Fair warning: you might be right. But my money's on you being wrong.

Been sitting on something you want to build from what you've been through — a podcast, a book, a speaking career, a nonprofit? Book a free 30-minute Direction Call at kategladdin.com/coaching. Not a sales call. A working session with a real outcome.