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Buckle up, patriots. In this episode of Ones Ready, Jared delivers your May 14th intel drop with a healthy dose of snark, sarcasm, and sheer disbelief. From raiding facility repair budgets to secure the border (bye-bye, AC in Vegas) to an AI tool that’s definitely not Ultron (yet), we hit the military’s greatest hits of misplaced priorities and bureaucratic buffoonery.

We cover the Pentagon's latest budgeting antics, DoD AI ambitions (because what could go wrong?), a suspiciously optimistic F-47 timeline, and a childcare crisis that screams, "We love our troops—just not their kids." Add in a Space Force budget tantrum, India's surgical flex on Pakistan, and a friendly reminder that PFAS is still turning your water into poison.

You’ll laugh. You’ll cry. You’ll probably question your enlistment contract.

🔥 Key Takeaways:

• 🧱 Border security gets $1B… at the expense of broken barracks and black mold.
• 🤖 AI-powered threat prediction sounds cool—until it’s targeting your face.
• ✈️ The F-47: coming "soon" (read: not a chance in 2025).
• 🍼 Holloman AFB has no childcare, but thank God we saved $8 on lawn care.
• 🌍 Space Force wants 25% of the DoD budget. They currently get 3%. Cue the tiny violin.
• ⚔️ India hit Pakistan with receipts—literally. Satellite images don’t lie.
• 💧 PFAS is still in your water. But hey, we’re building invisible planes.
• 🧑‍✈️ General rank reductions might mean fewer shiny stars, more actual warfighting.
• 💸 The DoD budget is a bloated mess of wishlist items, unfunded mandates, and vibes.

⏱️ Timestamps:
00:00 – Sponsor Shoutout: Modern Athlete Strength Systems
01:00 – DOD Border Budget Reallocation: Air Conditioning? Overrated.
03:00 – MAVEN AI Tool: Predictive Warfare Meets Marvel Plotlines
04:30 – Army Firepower in the Indo-Pacific: PACOM Flexin’
05:40 – Africa Wants U.S. Security, Not Chinese Port Deals
07:00 – New AF Secretary & NGAD Priorities: F-47 Fantasies
08:30 – AI Center of Excellence: Buzzword Overload
09:00 – Recruiting, Retention & the Real Reasons Pilots Leave
10:45 – Why Cutting the E-7A Wedgetail is Brain-Dead
11:30 – Childcare Crisis: “Figure It Out, Air

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