Happy Valentines day you're destroying the planet! Florida school hires armed vets to protect school. The Jussie Smollett story gets stranger by the day. Apple exec in charge of insider trading, well you probably already guessed it. Online service agreements are unreadable. Cows get a Tender like app.

El Chapo guilty and Ted Cruz has a cunning plan. Bill Cosby says jail is an amazing experience. California crashes it's high-speed rail & Florida man strikes again with an assault burrito.

The border war between Trump and Beto. Freshman lawmakers causing headaches on Capitol Hill. Internet tax in Georgia may be on the way. Chicago most corrupt city in Nation. Katy Perry's alleged racist shoes and don't call the cops if your stash is missing.

Maybe we should all start getting ready for Gov shutdown V2. The continuing Virginia political debacle. Jamaican beef patty rampage in The Bronx. Anti-Social Media & Valentines Suggestions.

Everybody's sayin' it, Bezos and Pecker. AOC ushers in new deal with a lot of green. LA City Hall is full of rats. Wanna' ride the horsey? No.

Blackface mania takes over Old Dominion. NYPD takes aim at Google. You just can't lick Florida lawmakers, well maybe you can. Millennials like music from the last century better and Ozzy checks in to the Hospital.

Can Trump tie a tie? Will Warren want wampum? Is Beto a looser? Will Venezuela get its cheeseburgers? Karl Marx... a turning a profit in his vandalized grave. All ahead on the Overnight Underground News Blip.

It's state of the union time (sing that to the Howdy Doody theme please). The warning signs of being a workaholic. A little good crime news for Chicago, and Seal Poo USB drives are a thing now.

Mary Poppins is racist, racist I say. What will the abominable snowmen do? Hey buddy your new car is a real pile of crap.

Nukes are back on the table. AOC shares her privilege. Shultz is not a cereal guy. Stabby in England? That's a bannin'. The war on hats continues and Albuquerque bologna.