Ownit! Powercast

In this episode we open the vault and grab one of your favorites: 145 which is all about what assertiveness truly is.

In episode EP179 of the Own It Powercast, I get into the topic of assertiveness and emphasizes the significance of detachment and setting boundaries. Assertiveness, is about making choices and maintaining clear boundaries without seeking control. I highlight the importance of distinguishing between one's own thoughts, feelings, choices, and behaviors versus those of others. Detachment becomes necessary when we become overly preoccupied with someone else's issues, experience heightened anxiety, or find ourselves making excuses for their behavior. By practicing detachment, we can refocus on what is within our control, establish healthier relationships, and prioritize our physical and mental well-being.

Setting boundaries involves staying in our own lane, expressing our needs and feelings assertively, and allowing others to face the consequences of their actions. The episode concludes with a reminder of the importance of self-care, personal responsibility, and the transformative power of detachment and boundaries in fostering confidence and authentic communication.

Key Elements:

· Explore the essence of assertiveness: Both parties are in a place of choice and there are no blurred boundaries or control.

· Look at the importance of detachment and boundaries in assertiveness and healthy communication.

· Discuss pointers for effective boundary-setting: being specific, keeping it about yourself, knowing your why, etc.

Stay in your lane.

This means not questioning, not giving unsolicited advice,

offering too much help…CHECK YOUR AGENDA for helping.

If there is any FEAR involved around them

helping themselves then don't.

It will just become a rescue effort.

Resources:

DON'T MISS THE FACEBOOK LIVES! Just sign up here to join the tribe at:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/1212485642262143

Make sure you sign up for the bonus downloads at www.ownitpowercast.com. Tribe members will receive them in their email each week.

Thank you for tuning in to this podcast. Please remember to leave a positive review on your podcast platform and let us know how this episode has been helpful. Also don't forget to subscribe to this podcast on Apple Podcasts, Google Play or Spotify so you don't miss a thing!

In this episode we open the vault and grab one of your favorites: 145 which is all about what assertiveness truly is.

On the show we talk about how true assertiveness is an integration of different elements that allow us to stand firmly in our convictions, speak up for what we believe in, and advocate for ourselves and others. Assertiveness is not about dominance or aggression but finding a balance between asserting our rights and respecting the rights of others. The goal is to maintain open and honest communication, foster healthy relationships, and create an environment of mutual understanding and respect. Assertiveness empowers us to express our thoughts and beliefs effectively, live authentically, and align our actions with our values and principles.

Over the next few months, the show will further explore the topic of assertiveness, and weekly Facebook Live sessions every Wednesday at 7 PM EST will be dedicated to discussing assertiveness.

Join the community to participate in the live sessions, access recordings, and other resources.

Key Elements:

· Explore what some of the aspects of assertiveness are.

· Look at how much healthier it is to have self/other perspective.

· Talk about how being assertive means having good boundaries.

If you're feeling trapped, overwhelmed, or

manipulated in your relationships,

it's time to set some boundaries…and speak them.

Resources:

DON'T MISS THE FACEBOOK LIVES! Just sign up here to join the tribe at:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/1212485642262143

Make sure you sign up for the bonus downloads at www.ownitpowercast.com. Tribe members will receive them in their email each week.

Thank you for tuning in to this podcast. Please remember to leave a positive review on your podcast platform and let us know how this episode has been helpful. Also don't forget to subscribe to this podcast on Apple Podcasts, Google Play or Spotify so you don't miss a thing!

In this episode we explore the topic of self-sabotage and its connection to anxiety. We delve into the various patterns and behaviors that constitute self-sabotage, such as procrastination, negative self-talk, self-isolation, comfort zone preservation, self-handicapping, self-sabotaging relationships, substance abuse, perfectionism, people-pleasing, and avoidance. We emphasize the importance of recognizing these patterns as the first step towards breaking free from self-sabotage and fostering positive change.

We then look at the childhood origins that can contribute to self-sabotage in adulthood. Critical parenting, trauma and neglect, lack of emotional validation, high expectations and pressure, inconsistent or unpredictable parenting, enmeshment or overprotection, and learned helplessness are all factors that can shape self-sabotaging behaviors. While childhood experiences can influence self-sabotage, it is not a predetermined outcome, and with self-awareness, coaching, support, and healing, you can overcome these patterns!

Key Elements:

· Look at how self-sabotage reinforces anxiety in several ways and perpetuates the avoidance of discomfort.

· Process how each means of sabotage serves a protective purpose – then creates it's own issues!

· Discuss practical advice for starting the process of overcoming self-sabotage.

Don't shame yourself more by

being mad at your self-sabotage.

Realize it was there to protect you…

and now you're brave enough

to stop doing it.

Resources:

DON'T MISS THE FACEBOOK LIVE SHOWS! Just sign up here to join the tribe at:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/1212485642262143

Make sure you sign up for the bonus downloads at www.ownitpowercast.com. Tribe members will receive them in their email each week.

Thank you for tuning in to this podcast. Please remember to leave a positive review on your podcast platform and let us know how this episode has been helpful. Also don't forget to subscribe to this podcast on Apple Podcasts, Google Play or Spotify so you don't miss a thing!

Welcome back to this month's episode focused on one of the biggest issues in people's lives: Anxiety. Last week, we delved into social anxiety and its connection to shame and perfectionism. Today, we'll be discussing Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), which can range from mild irritations to debilitating struggles. No matter where you fall on that spectrum, anxiety has the potential to limit your life and impact your well-being, both mentally and physically.

In this episode, we explore the symptoms and impact of GAD, including excessive worry, physical symptoms, negative self-evaluation, avoidance behaviors, and its effects on daily functioning. We uncover the connection between GAD and early trauma, where experiences such as childhood trauma, loss or bereavement, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), chronic stress, or medical trauma can contribute to the development of GAD over time.

Then, we dive into the relationship between anxiety and anger, which is often overlooked. So many people with anxiety have learned to suppress or avoid anger due to early experiences or unresolved trauma. The suppression of anger can lead to difficulties with boundaries and create a cycle of hidden anger. We explore surprising signs of hidden anger and its impact on daily life.

Key Elements:

· Highlight the importance of authenticity in overcoming generalized anxiety.

· Process the ways outsourcing who we are fuels the anxiety fire.

· Address how healing emotional trauma and setting boundaries is vital in managing anxiety effectively.

You can't love and be proud of yourself

and have confidence if you are

NOT connected

to who you are and

showing THAT to the world.

Resources:

Make sure you sign up for the bonus downloads at www.ownitpowercast.com. Tribe members will receive them in their email each week.

Thank you for tuning in to this podcast. Please remember to leave a positive review on your podcast platform and let us know how this episode has been helpful. Also don't forget to subscribe to this podcast on Apple Podcasts, Google Play or Spotify so you don't miss a thing!

Welcome episode 204 where we explore the origins and the aspects of social anxiety.

In this episode we get into a form of anxiety that is so misunderstood and often hidden from others, because of the vicious cycle of shame and embarrassment and that is social anxiety. I have worked many years with clients around this issue, and I have learned a lot. I find it is so important if we want to have a fulfilling life – or maybe just actually LIVING one, that I'm designing an entire learning experience to help more people heal. We talk about social anxiety and how it is not just being socially anxious in a vacuum but rather an interplay of shame, perfectionism, and early emotional trauma. We explore the different facets of this struggle, from avoiding social situations, conflict and being rejected and how this can profoundly impact your life. Social anxiety keeps you from using your voice, asking for what you need or even relaxing enough to enjoy engagements and have new adventures.

Key Elements:

· Look at what causes social anxiety and how it is created early on.

· Process the ways it shows up and keeps us from creating healthy relationships.

· Explore how it is so connected to/caused by perfectionism, shame and lack of confidence.

It's never just "social anxiety."

It's a tangle of fear, shame,

and perfectionism, with each

reinforcing the other in a vicious cycle.

Resources:

Make sure you sign up for the bonus downloads at www.ownitpowercast.com. Tribe members will receive them in their email each week.

Thank you for tuning in to this podcast. Please remember to leave a positive review on your podcast platform and let us know how this episode has been helpful. Also don't forget to subscribe to this podcast on Apple Podcasts, Google Play or Spotify so you don't miss a thing!

Welcome episode 203 where we look at the origins of anxiety and how it affects us in adulthood.

In this episode we talk about how early childhood trauma, lack of family boundaries, and bad experiences with unhealthy people can all contribute to anxiety in different ways. Childhood trauma can lead to anxiety by disrupting healthy development, causing dysregulation of emotions, and impairing cognitive functioning. Lack of family boundaries can contribute to anxiety by leading to unclear expectations, parentification, and inconsistent parenting. Bad experiences with unhealthy people can distort our view of what's possible in relationships, causing negative beliefs, trust issues with self and others, difficulty setting boundaries, and lots of unhealthy coping mechanisms.

Key Elements:

· Look at aspects of families that can contribute to longstanding anxiety.

· Describe how boundaries – and lack thereof – in families can create problems for the child with their self-esteem and their relationships.

· Explore how different levels of early emotional trauma cause varying degrees of anxiety and other struggles later on.

No one gets out of an emotionally dysfunctional

family unscathed. At the very least there

will be a wee bit of perfectionism

and that constant low hum of anxiety.

Resources:

Make sure you sign up for the bonus downloads at www.ownitpowercast.com. Tribe members will receive them in their email each week.

Thank you for tuning in to this podcast. Please remember to leave a positive review on your podcast platform and let us know how this episode has been helpful. Also don't forget to subscribe to this podcast on Apple Podcasts, Google Play or Spotify so you don't miss a thing!

EP202 The Faces of Anxiety: Conquering Your Inner Turmoil

Welcome episode 202 where we open a new month dedicated to understanding fear and anxiety, and how they can greatly impact on your life.

In this episode we introduce the concepts of fear and anxiety, specifically general anxiety and social anxiety and how they can play out in our life. This can lead into self-sabotaging behaviors – some we may not even be conscious of – and can have huge impacts. We will look at where it comes from, how it shows up in our life, and ways we can sabotage and thus keep ourselves stuck and missing out on some of the best things in life. We then talk about how someone can begin working on their anxiety and make some lasting changes. Healing old wounds about our lives and ourselves can help us create a way of being that is more authentic, courageous and in the moment.

Key Elements:

· Defining the most common types of anxiety.

· Process how fear and anxiety can cause us to self-sabotage.

· Look at a case study of social anxiety.

To tackle your anxiety,

you must heal on the inside,

while you're changing things

on the outside.

Resources:

Make sure you sign up for the bonus downloads at www.ownitpowercast.com. Tribe members will receive them in their email each week.

Thank you for tuning in to this podcast. Please remember to leave a positive review on your podcast platform and let us know how this episode has been helpful. Also don't forget to subscribe to this podcast on Apple Podcasts, Google Play or Spotify so you don't miss a thing!

Welcome episode 201 where we finish out the month digging deep about what makes it hard to just…make a choice.

In this episode we talk about some of the reasons why we may struggle to own and make choices that could actually make our life better. We discuss the costs of missed opportunities, connection with others and our sense of self. From procrastination, perfectionism and resistance to change, we explore the reasons we struggle to climb out of the box of safety, and ways we can begin to get out there and take some healthy risks. We finish up the month by looking at why it can be hard to not only own but make choices that are good for our life. Since our choices can literally make our life what it is, I think this is an important topic. Why are we holding back? Sitting on the fence? Putting off the decisions we know we need to make?

Key Elements:

· Process the core issue behind our struggle to trust our choices.

· Discuss the concepts of perfectionism, procrastination and resistance.

· Look at ways you can begin to chip away at these old patterns and get started making changes.

Your real self wants better,

knows there is better and

knows that they can BE better,

but fear keeps you stuck.

Resources:

Make sure you sign up for the bonus downloads at www.ownitpowercast.com. Tribe members will receive them in their email each week.

Thank you for tuning in to this podcast. Please remember to leave a positive review on your podcast platform and let us know how this episode has been helpful. Also don't forget to subscribe to this podcast on Apple Podcasts, Google Play or Spotify so you don't miss a thing!

Welcome to WOOHOO! Episode 200! where we look at what we pick to focus on – the solution, the person, ourselves etc. and how our choices really do reflect who we are. In other words, folks looking in on your life from the outside – what would they see your choices are?

In this episode we talk about how if people were looking at your life, they could tell that you take responsibility for your choices. This means, by looking at the quality of your relationship with yourself and others, and how much you are open, humble and teachable. Your boundaries, both external and internal, reveal a great deal about how you live your life, as well as your ability to manage conflict and problem-solve. We also did an experiential exercise to get you digging deeper into your choice-making process.

Key Elements:

· Look at how your choices show how healthy your boundaries are.

· Describe the ways our choices affect our relationships.

· Explore how you see your choices and how they are impacting your life.

You must make a "Choice"

To take a "Chance"

or your life will never

"Change".

-Author Unknown

Resources:

Make sure you sign up for the bonus downloads at www.ownitpowercast.com. Tribe members will receive them in their email each week.

Thank you for tuning in to this podcast. Please remember to leave a positive review on your podcast platform and let us know how this episode has been helpful. Also don't forget to subscribe to this podcast on Apple Podcasts, Google Play or Spotify so you don't miss a thing!

Welcome to Episode 199 where we talk about one of my favorite topics, and that is how we choose our environments, and how we need to be very intentional about what and WHAT and WHO have around us because they can have a tremendous impact on the quality of our life, and maybe even the length of it. We absorb what is around us, no matter what we tell ourselves!

In this episode we look at an important area where we are making choices for our self-confidence and well-being, and one that has a huge impact on us, and that is our environments. The people, places and things that surround us either create a healthy, supportive atmosphere for us to grow and thrive, or one that is either just unsupportive or downright toxic and will do harm over time. Taking stock of our situations and how we actually look and feel will tell us the truth we need to know.

Key Elements:

· Describe how where we work and live impact our mental health.

· Explore the difference between safe and unsafe people to have around.

· Look at ways people can influence our decision making.

"Be careful the environment you choose

for it will shape you;

be careful the friends you choose

for you will become like them."

–W. Clement Stone

Resources:

Make sure you sign up for the bonus downloads at www.ownitpowercast.com. Tribe members will receive them in their email each week.

Thank you for tuning in to this podcast. Please remember to leave a positive review on your podcast platform and let us know how this episode has been helpful. Also don't forget to subscribe to this podcast on Apple Podcasts, Google Play or Spotify so you don't miss a thing!