Paging Mr Potter

STATE OF OREGANO 🍕🏉🤌 If you're hungry for some rugby league news ahead of this week's blockbuster state of origin clash you're in luck, as we'll be serving up some piping hot NRL themed pizzas fresh from a highly questionable Sydney-based pizzeria. We also discuss messianic ska bands, bid vale to yet another filthy potterphile/pedophile, and consider a potential rebrand from the PMP boys to the PNS boys...

MAMBO AUSTRALIANO: Was the classic song 'Mambo Italiano' cooked up by a sterile American record company, and not made with love in a genuine Italian nonna's trattoria? PMP investigates... We also recount some disgusting pub stories more suitable for a mens room wall than a Harry Potter podcast, and unveil our policy for protecting Australia's biodiversity from invasive Norwegian dragons with brutal efficiency.

KING SHIT: this week we dissect the obscene spectacle that was the coronation of his majesty King Charles III, including the questionable catering, motley cast of characters, and Meghan Markle's crude (but effective) disguise. We also discuss the joys of corporal punishment, theatrical older siblings, and OJ Simpson's infamous baseball career.

In an insane act of hubris, the NRL looks to capture the United States market (and guzzle down more of that sweet, sweet gambling money) by letting rugby league players run rampant in the City of Sin! Could this possibly be a good idea? Find out as we preview ✨MAGIC ROUND✨ this weekend. Also Riordan offers (threatens) too recite Miss Congeniality in its entirety, Draco is caught red-handed perving on one of his fellow Horgwartians, and one of the world’s sharpest minds is dealt a truly harrowing punishment in this week’s Viktor Krumuppance. 

We begin this week by discussing some uniquely Australian art forms including throat-step and BBQ hip-hop, before taking a trip south of the border for a Mexican lucha libre wrestling extravaganza! Then to round it all off we wade in to some truly grotesque topics - namely newborn babies and chimpanzee buttholes 🐒🍑

DALAI KARMA 😛 This week the spiritual leader of Tibetan Buddhism, his Holiness the Dalai Lama, receives some well-earned Victor Krumuppance. We also discuss the most and least sexy mens names, and delve into why dudes named Wayne are always above average at fingering. And finally we discuss getting revenge on would-be thieves using the old 'dipping cash in cyanide' trick.

Well golly make sure you don't miss this week's pod... we've got important POO UPDATES for you!! 💩💩💩 That's right, even after we spent all that time last week talking about poo, apparently that wasn't enough so we're back for round number 2 😜 this week with some important POO UPDATES 💩💩💩 provided by the ever-reliable potterphiles, one of which might even save the life of your most beloved family member. But never fear, we also find time for some serious film chat as we discuss Everything Everywhere All At Once... And Everything In Between.

This week we urge you to abandon your friends, family, society etc and instead join up with a ragtag community of online weirdos in the pornhub comments section 🥰 🥰 We also interrogate the claim that blood is thicker than water 👩‍🔬 and reveal the little known legal loophole guaranteed to absolve you of any and all criminal charges! Plus we debut the brand-spanking new game (concocted by another one of you lunatic potterphiles) - Neville Have I Eville!

NAZI SANDWICH: Unfortunately this week's pod is book ended by some inevitable Nazi chat, since apparently there's heaps of them running around in Melbourne... but even if that's not to your taste, don't miss out on the sweet, sweet filling in this Nazi sub - as we also talk about Jesus's supple body, festive intergenerational warfare, and the surprising new star of the upcoming Robbie Williams biopic who might bang your daughter, but might also steal your bananas!

It's an extra long pod this week to compensate for our increasingly loose schedule... but its fair to say a lot has happened in those few additional days since our last podcast including COOL STUFF 😎 like getting catatonically drunk at a Harry Styles concert, AWKWARD STUFF 🐢 like probably dying in a pointless war with China soon, and CRAZY STUFF 🤪 like the insane Airtasker blood feud that one Riordan Lee has unwittingly stumbled into... We also find time to talk some PHILOSOPHY 🧐 as we try to answer the age old question - is it ever morally permissible to put dynamite in a kid's bike helmet?