Pickleball Therapy

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You never see a sad pickleball player when they win.

But when they lose? Depends, but for many a losing day is a sad (or bad, disappointing, etc.) day.

Should it be?

The answer is a resounding “No!” 

If you are like most, you have developed your sports’ mind around “win, good – lose, bad.” The reality, however, is that our relationship with sport is more nuanced than this binary good/bad framing.

At our podcast, Pickleball Therapy, we developed a re-framing of your pickleball experience around a pretty ubiquitous symbol of good: ice cream. It has helped so many players reconsider how they approach their results that it has become our most popular podcast.

The good news is that you can have all the highs that come when winning without the needless downs when you lose. It is simply a matter of shifting your perspective. And focusing on what matters – the reason you play pickleball to begin with.

In this week’s episode, we update our Bowl of Ice Cream and address objections that players sometimes raise to it when they first hear the concept.

If you have never heard Bowl of Ice Cream, treat yourself to this episode. If you are familiar with it, a refresher never hurt – plus you will get the benefit of a more seasoned presentation.

Head over to Pickleball Therapy – our weekly podcast dedicated to your pickleball mind. You can find it anywhere that podcasts are podcasted and on YouTube.

Get your FREE ticket to the 100% online Pickleball Summit here.

We asked for your pet peeves. Over 300 players answered the call and shared them with us.

Many of the pet peeves shared with us were rules issues: line calls, illegal serves and just generally not following the rules. On the surface, maybe it is ok to feel this way. It is just a part of who we are or how we see things and leave it at that.

But scratch the surface and you find that there is, in fact, a cost to allowing your mind to be occupied with these sorts of thoughts. There are actual two costs:

1.     You are using mental bandwidth that could go elsewhere – specifically, toward your game. Imagine the game-time opportunities that you are not seeing because your mental bandwidth is being absorbed by “I’m not sure that serve was legal.”

2.     You are undermining your enjoyment of the bigger experience. You are on a court, playing the sport you love. Yet rather than being engrossed in the moment, you are focused on a tiny piece of the picture, allowing it to diminish your otherwise awesome experience.

Think of it like someone taking their phone out to send a text during a movie you are otherwise enjoying. Are you going to focus on the phone, or on the movie?

The next time something during a game pulls you away from the big screen that you are on, remember that you came here for the movie (and maybe the popcorn). Keep your eye on the big picture and you’ll play (and feel) better.

Send us your responses to [email protected].

Be well

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I recently got into the Wordle craze (a bit late I know).

Got me to thinking though – why do we like games like Wordle, Crosswords, Sudoku, etc.? And does this same thought process apply to pickleball?

Start here: why do we play a game like Wordle?

Is it because of the game’s solution? The solution, itself, is what we are after.

Or is it because of the work it takes to get to the solution? The solution is relevant because we are working toward it, but the reason for the game is the steps it takes to get there.

Stay with me here because it might just be the mental breakthrough you need to hear.

Wordle does not teach me new words when I play it. In other words, I am not discovering a new word when I solve the puzzle. That is not the point of it.

In any event, in a few weeks I will forget the ones from this week. That is not the point of it.

The reason for playing Wordle is in the act itself of working to solve the puzzle. That is the point of it.

In a year I will not remember the exact words I work on this week, but I will have gained the benefit of a more nimble mind, having worked through somewhere around 300+ Wordles during that time.

Pickleball is exactly the same.

What were your pickleball scores when you played on April 10, 2024? June 15, 2023? You get the picture.

The scores do not matter. Neither do the outcomes of specific rallies (think it through – there’s no difference).

What matters is that you are playing. You are hitting the ball. Trying to do your best each time you swing the paddle.

The joy of pickleball is in the process – the playing. Not in the results – the winning or losing.

Each time you play, you try to do the best you can. If you want to play better, you can study the game and put in some work. Even in those moments you can embrace the journey – because there is value in that.

As you play, your life improves. Your body is better for it. Your mind is better for it. Your soul is better for it.

Don’t let the outcomes rob you of the joy that is present with every shot you hit on a pickleball court. Outcomes are not the point of it. Playing is.

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See you there.

Tony

We all get advice – YouTube, friendly local player, partner. What do we do with it?

Step 1: Remember that you have agency over your pickleball journey. This means that you get to decide whether to take the tip or say “get that outta here” (note – you can say it in your mind).

Here’s the thing: 45% of the advice you hear out there is plain wrong. And 54% of the advice may be right in the general sense of the term, but it is not right for you at this stage (wrong for a different reason). That leaves 1% of the advice being right and, importantly, right for you.

How do you know where a particular piece of advice falls: the wrong, the not right now, or the 1% that is just what I need?

To quote Shakespeare, “therein lies the rub.” It is figuring out both what is correct and also what it is that will most benefit you right now. Or at least staying away from what will be detrimental to your game.

If you are not yet sure how to decide, you will want to identify a mentor. This is a person with more knowledge who can help you navigate the sea of information out there. If you do not have such a mentor, CJ and I are happy to help. 

Subscribe to our email list at BetterPickleball.com. This will give you access to our weekly newsletter and keep you in the loop on the latest in pickleball thinking.

Follow our podcast, Pickleball Therapy, as well as our YouTube channels, In2Pickle and Better Pickleball. You will know that the information you are receiving comes from trusted sources and has been thought out in terms of being correct and having wide application.

Once you develop a deeper understanding of the game, including its framework, you will be in a position to make your own decisions about what advice stays and what advice can get outta here.

Thank you for the shoutout on YouTube Alan

Tony I have been listening to your pickleball therapy shows from the beginning. I know without a doubt that I am a better player because of your podcasts but more importantly a better person. Your presentations can be a benefit not only in pickleball but in life in general. Keep it up and thank you for your time you invest to create these podcasts.

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Embrace the journey and enjoy the process.

Tony

To be a complete pickleball player you need a third shot drop.

Seems simple enough but, as with many things in life, once you scratch at it a little you find out that it is not quite that simple.

Before players start losing their mind reading the next words, let me make this one thing clear: in a hypothetical, what do you need to play a complete pickleball game, the third shot drop plays an important role. That is not the point of this article. Rather, the point is that a third shot drop alone is not the trick. And the other part will give you more benefit now.

Here’s the reality of the third shot drop: the shot is but a piece of a larger puzzle. To get the benefit of even the best third shot drop, you need to know and be able to navigate:

1.     Movement – both for the hitting player and their partner (the non-hitting player)

2.     Angles and angle coverage

3.     Propensities and likely counters to your third shot drop

Otherwise, you end up with an ineffective piece of the puzzle: a third shot drop that does not do what you want it to.

Rather than focusing on your third shot drop at first, consider spending your time on the movement piece. And specifically, recognizing when NOT to move forward on the third shot. You are going to need this anyways and it will give you benefit now.

As a side note here, think of how many times you end up winning the point on the serve team when you have not made it up to the NVZ line because you stayed in a good position and were able to extend the rally. We demonstrate this in our November 2023 video on In2Pickle (YouTube) entitled “The Pickleball Third Shot (Drop?) You ACTUALLY NEED to Win”

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Enjoy this week's podcast and see you next week.

Tony

We are friends. Playing a pickleball game. One of us will win and one of us will lose. That is just the way of things.

Imagine a world where you went into the game like this:

1.     I know that no matter what, either my team or my friends opposite me on the court will be able to celebrate the win.

2.     I also know that no matter what, the other one of us will walk away with something to add to their games.

I was reminded of this take on the succinct, “win or learn” idea this past weekend at the conclusion of the French Open semi-final. Specifically, Janik Sinner had just lost after a back-and-forth battle with his respected adversary, Carlos Alcaraz.

While Janik was disappointed at not winning – perfectly normal – he was able to immediately reframe the loss as an opportunity. He knows that there is a lot of tennis left in him, and in Carlos. And that they will meet again. Between now and then, Janik has the opportunity to work on his game so that the next time, Carlos is the one who leaves with a lesson to work on.

Having this sort of improved perspective can:

·       help all of us avoid the needless downside when we, unavoidably, lose one or more pickleball games, and

·       actually gain from the experience so that we can continue to grow as players.

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Be well

Tony

I was reminded of an important concept speaking to one of our team members who is a volleyball player converted to pickleball.

The conversation went something like this (group setting):

Me:      “Hard to lob Emily as she can get up in the air.”

Emily:  “Yeah and I even like to jump when I do not have to.”

Me:      “I’ve seen it. Ball can be at Emily’s head height and she is full in the air smashing that ball.”

Emily:  “It makes me happy to jump like that.”

Me:      “Good point. Happiness is paramount (or words to this effect).”

As coaches, CJ and I are spend a lot of time devising and sharing actionable guidance about the framework, objectives, strategies, and shots that a player can use to play a really good pickleball game.

BUT …

At the end of the day, we are playing a game. Or at least that is what it is supposed to be.

As you go through your growth process, it is important not to lose sight of this. A few examples:

1.     You want to learn that “killer” serve because every time you serve like that it puts a big smile on your face. Awesome. Then you should pursue that shot. Not because it is strategically significant, but because it makes you happy.

2.     You like hitting the ball hard. That is what makes you happiest in the world. Then, by all means, keep doing it. You may not be able to advance as far as a player as you would if you added a soft game component. But as long as you understand that and are still happier hitting hard, then continue doing what makes you happy. That is paramount.

3.     If you like jumping to hit the shots (it makes you smile), then continue doing it.

There is nothing wrong with playing pickleball in a way that makes you happy. And there is nothing inconsistent with understanding that X is better for you but choosing to do Y because you want to. It is no different than enjoying a doughnut or other sweet treat even though we know that is not what a dietitian would probably advise.

If you like this sort of conversation, join me inside Pickleball Therapy. It is a podcast. And it is available everywhere, even on YouTube.

I’ll see you there.

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Your Relationship with Pickleball

Much of the information available about pickleball has to do with the details: How do I hit a certain shot? What is the latest paddle thing going on? What is the rule about [__________]?

There are many fewer resources that tackle our relationship with pickleball. The term “relationship” is one we use very intentionally. If you are reading these words, then you are more than just a once in a while player of the sport called pickleball. Rather, you are someone who enjoys a multi-faceted relationship with pickleball.

Social, exercise, personal growth, fun, challenge, activity, grounding, addiction – all words used by pickleball players to describe why they play pickleball. Our relationship usually encompasses a combination of several of these terms. Thinking of it as a “relationship” more accurately captures the importance and extent of our interaction with pickleball.

Why is this important? Because it signals to us that there is more to it than just finding the key to that perfect third shot drop. There is a bigger picture to our interaction with pickleball. Understanding this will allow us to enjoy the fullest experience and get the most out of our sport.

This is the sort of thing we dive into each week on Pickleball Therapy. We aim to be an oasis in an otherwise sparse landscape where you can come in and get some shade and a sip of water. You can find the podcast on all podcast platforms (Apple, Spotify, etc.) and also on YouTube. Just type in Pickleball Therapy and see what it is all about.

Come in out of the sun and take a respite. We’ll be there.

Send us an email: [email protected]

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Is losing 3-11 not fun for you? It might be - depending on how you look at it PLUS Too old or unskilled to play pickleball?

You just got done playing 6 games, never scoring more than 3 points in a game.

I try to share come encouragement by saying to you “It’s not the end of the world.” You agree but then add “But it’s less fun.”

Is it less fun? Let’s talk about it.

Oftentimes when we are thinking through arguably negative situations, like not scoring more than 3 points in a game for 6 games in a row, the negativity stems not from the situation itself. Rather, the negativity stems from our framing of the situation. The situation itself is neutral. It is we who imbue it with the negative.

Generally speaking, losing 3-11 is not as much fun as losing 5-11, is not as much fun as losing 9-11, is not as much fun as losing 13-15. And we haven’t yet even gotten to the winning side.

If we stopped here, then perhaps “But it’s less fun” would be correct.

There is, however, more road to explore. What about losing 1-11? Or the pickle 0-11?

Even worse, what about comparing 3-11 to not playing at all? Or being injured? Or [fill in the countless things that are nowhere near as fun as playing a pickleball game]?

With this framing, then the correct statement after a day of 3-11 games is “It was certainly more fun than the alternatives.”

This is the power of framing. You get to decide the relevant context that you place your day’s events in. Use your framing power to maintain a better perspective and enjoy a stronger relationship with pickleball (and everything else too).

If you enjoy this approach to the mental game, check out the Pickleball Therapy Podcast on all platforms (YouTube too).

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Stay well

Tony