Rant Not Over

Evan is back and better! He made a big move out west and we dive into what that transition looked like, the adjustments, and the lessons learned along the journey. You will never have it figured out, so take peace in knowing the journey is the fun part. Trust yourself above all. Stop listening to people's judgement who are living lives you don't want. I give my own little vulnerable life update and what my future holds. You can't grow if you're comfortable. 

Keep up with Evan's adventures! @evanlanc

1st layer is self-awareness + acknowledgement: This requires introspection, recognizing behaviors, patterns, toxic habits, etc. This is the catalyst for the rest of the journey towards happiness and self-fulfillment. 

2nd layer is self-responsibility + accountability: This requires digging and unpacking (scary, but crucial to not avoid). Take ownership over your own life, your own healing, and your own behaviors. YOU are the common denominator in your life, take responsibility for it. 

3rd layer is acceptance + control: This requires releasing and accepting what you cannot control, and start focusing on what you can control. This is a mindset shift, and energy shift, and ultimately leads to true FREEDOM.  

I give some vulnerable, real life examples of my own behaviors and patterns and how I've maneuvered through them using this process. 

Let's change the narrative of how you can truly be responsible for your own happiness. 

Boundaries are not a negative thing, they're to keep you safe. You can't expect someone to change their behavior if you don't express your boundary. Communicating boundaries are hard, and the delivery is important. Boundaries come down to self respect and knowing yourself, what you need, and what you aren't willing to tolerate. Adult friendships aren't easy, give them grace. The benefits of dating around. Sydni shares her non-negotiables/boundaries and I share mine. Signs that you need to set boundaries in a relationship.

Follow Sydni on Instagram: @sydnibickford

Check out the novel we referenced: Set Boundaries, Find Peace by Nedra Glover Tawwab 

Bonus episode!!!! 

Happy Valentine's Day yall! Today we celebrate ALL love - self, platonic, familial, and romantic. You can be alone and still be fulfilled. There is no greater gift to give yourself than self-love. Your thoughts become your reality, be careful what you tell yourself. Stop glorifying relationships you don't even know the half about - create your OWN version of relationship goals. 

IG: @reonnajade + @rantnotoverpodcast

F*ck caring what people think about your social media, DO YOU BOO! Working out boosts your confidence, it's no coincidence. EAT CARBS!!!! Your body is your best friend, be kind to yourself. When you're authentically you, you win. 

Follow Kim on Instagram! @kimm.simpson

Take responsibility for your own circumstances, shortcomings, and reactions. Stop blaming the universe or other people for your life, take back your power and take control. No one likes a victim mentality. It's not what happens to us, it's how we react to it. Give yourself the closure and healing you need, don't expect it from someone else. Use your adversity as your advantage, not as your excuse. 

Everyone’s love language is quality time, just be present and intentional with your time. Take social cues, not everyone loves physical touch (especially on a first date). Don’t buy your way out of trouble with gifts, it doesn’t replace your shortcoming. Do the act of service because you want to make the other person’s life easier, not because you want to use it as leverage. Selfless sex is the best sex, by the way. Words of affirmation…oof. I'm shook and proud that most of my IG followers have had the "love languages talk" with their partner. Romantic relationships can survive if love languages don't align, IF both partners are willing to communicate their way through it. 

Follow Elise on IG: @elisee_k

This is a juicy one. I give my two cents on y'alls turn-ons and turn-offs while dating. I also give mine at the end! Communication is key, and honestly expected. It's also more than just speaking, it's understanding too. A guy having a house plant or two is a green flag (pun totally intended). Have ambition, a goal, a passion...something! Do you think the guy should pay for the first date? Consistency is hot, vulnerability is sexy. Confidence is appreciated, just don't be obnoxious. Also, just be nice to the waiters y'all it's not that hard. 

Getting hit on at the gym (don’t do it). You can be honest without being brutal. The difference between honesty and transparency. Stop asking girls for their snapchat. India hates cardio. Cooking together is not a love language, get the f*ck out of my way. MAKE YOUR BED. How journaling gets me through my toughest days. Navigating anxiety. Introvert vs extrovert. Dating gone wrong. Passion vs purpose, and finding yours. Pour into people that pour back into you.

Follow India on Instagram! @ndeeyuh