The three mustaches read and discuss horrific One Star Reviews about Austin, TX restaurants.

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We recap the best and worst of 2023 including the Oceangate Titanic disaster, Barbenheimer, Matthew Perry’s death, Prince Harry’s terrible book, and Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce’s whirlwind romance — plus our predictions for 2024.

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Jonathan Majors has been dropped from Marvel after being found guilty of third-degree assault, Matthew Perry was apparently doing Ketamine when he died, and a serial killer lured his victims into the woods by promising them that there was gold in there.

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Oprah reveals that her newfound massive weight loss is from Ozempic and we think more celebrities should embrace the drug, Glory actor Andre Braugher died from lung cancer at the age of 61, and Four Christmases is the most underrated Christmas movie out there.

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A girlfriend is going viral for taking to TikTok to cry about how none of her boyfriend’s friends showed up to his birthday party but it’s unclear how “real” the situation actually is — plus the Golden Globe nominations are out and Oppenheimer is going to win everything, and an Oklahoma Sheriff beat up a sex shop worker after his girlfriend bought a vibrator that was “bigger than him.”

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Panera Bread's "Charged Lemonade" drink has killed two customers with heart problems because the drink is loaded with more caffeine than a Four Loko, an Ohio woman who threw a burrito bowl at a Chipotle worker has been sentenced to working two months at a fast food restaurant, and actress Casey Wilson called Tim Allen "a little b*tch" after working with him on the Disney+ show The Santa Clauses.

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The three mustaches discuss the heartbreaking case of Ryan Waller and Heather Quan. In 2006, Waller was the victim of a violent break-in at his house leaving his girlfriend, Heather, dead and him seriously injured. Ryan was interrogated for 6 hours before police made a startling discovery.

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The new Grand Theft Auto trailer leaked and it looks absolutely insane, a terrible AI version of Jimmy Stewart will now read stories to you as you fall asleep, and Nelly is officially BACK after his Big 12 Championship halftime show and his new baby with Ashanti.

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It turns out Golden Bachelor Gerry Turner wasn't totally honest about his dating history after he became a widower, the allegations about P. Diddy seem like they might be extremely true, formerly paralyzed NFL player Ryan Shazier has been caught cheating on his wife and she posted the dirty laundry online, and Bradley Cooper's new movie is apparently a masterpiece.

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South Carolina lawyer Alex Murdaugh has been convicted of crimes AGAIN, Disney's new movie 'Wish' is bombing at the box office, a Florida woman stabbed her boyfriend in the eye with a rabies needle for looking at other women, and a Saudi Prince bought plane tickets for 80 of his closest falcons.

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