Rotted Podcast

Who thought it would be a good idea to make a movie about soccer executives? Apparently Sepp Blatter and the brilliant minds at FIFA. 

Learn the exciting story of how coca cola and Adidas became sponsors of FIFA! Dazzle at a group of drunk Europeans try to get the evil British to let them make up the rules and regulations of Soccer. Marvel at Gerard Depardieu's buttnose! 

A movie where producer Sepp Blatter makes himself a hero that is staunchly anti corruption which came out the same week as the 2015 FIFA corruption scandal which eventually forced him to resign. 

Other Questions we had:

Why does everyone look like a Dick Tracy Villain?

Can girls play soccer?

How did they get actors like Tim Roth, Sam Neill, and Gerard Depardieu? I guess I'd sell out for a million dollars.

We talk about the worst movie we have ever seen on the show: Foodfight!

This movie has one of the most interesting backstories featuring stolen hard drives, corporate espionage, and some of the worst animation conditions imaginable. 

"The movie stars Dex Dogtective, a name-play on the fact that he is a dog detective, is the only relatable character of the film Foodfight!, voice by Charlie Sheen. This protagonist, something to cling onto while you cringe and question your life choices and goals, is trapped in the universe of a grocery store solving cases and cracking down on crime." http://foodfightmovie.wikia.com/wiki/Dex_Dogtective

"This movie actually took $65,000,000 to make, but it is said that they spent $64,990,000 on very psychadelic drugs and Mr.Clean products."

We'll I'm going to go kill myself so enjoy the ep!

This 0% movie is a nostalgia-fest even if you haven't seen it.

Featuring the first feature performance of Hawkeye's Jeremy Renner. 

Is this plot what inspired Donald Trump to be president?

We go into the history of the National Lampoon movies, list the name of the bands in the most 90's sounding soundtrack ever, talk about how great Kids in the Hall was, and blaze some bowls bra!

Thanks for listening!

Our newest 0% movie is American Ninja from 1985. We go into the history of the series and the production company Canon Films who made some of the most badass films of the 80's.

Did the director know how the army worked?

How did Michael Dudikoff get the role over 2000 actors with a voice like that and no martial arts training? 

IMDB Synopsis: American soldier, obviously very skilled in martial arts, single-handedly takes on mercenaries in the Philippines.

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We watched another really bad horror film. One Missed Call is an americanized version of an only ok Japanese horror film. Made at the end of the J-horror craze of the 200's this movie tries to combine the mechanics of the Ring and Final Destination. Also features some of the worst CGI of the year.

Please rate and review us if you like the show!

For a new podcast feature we decide to pick three action/adventure films that are rated rotten on Rotten Tomatoes (Below 60%) that we think should be revisited and rated fresh!

What action movies do you think should be fresh? 

If you like this segment be sure to rate and review us and we'll do more of these. 

Chase's List

3. Die Hard With A Vengeance

2. Roadhouse

1. Last Action Hero

Kris's List

3. Sidekicks

2. Bondock Saints

1. Super

Adam's List:

3. Matrix Revolutions

2. Speed Racer

1.The Mummy  

It's hard to say we didn't know what we were getting into with a director named Kaos. We watch the zero percent rated Matrix lite Ballistics Ecks Vs Sever.

How do you waste 70 million dollars?

How do you make Lucy Liu unlikeable?

What's the name of the movie again? 

How do you loss a wife like a child at a grocery store?

These questions and more will be answered on the episode.

We also read a positive review that gets really dark really quick.

FINAL RATING: 12%

Rotten Tomatoes Critics Consensus: A startlingly inept film, Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever offers overblown, wall-to-wall action without a hint of wit, coherence, style, or originality.

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We finally found a zero percent movie that deserves a fresh rating with the semi-cult classic film TerrorVision from 1986. A monster from planet Pluton comes from the TV screen to terrorize a terrible family. Can they teach it about music before it eats all of them?

We ask other hard hitting questions like:

How do you satirize Reaganomics? 

How much KY is too much KY?

Is this all in the head of an autistic Child?

and finally Could a film be more 1980's?

Final Average ratings: 60%

IMDB synopsis: A family's new satellite TV system starts receiving signals from another planet, and soon it becomes the passageway to an alien world.

The film was directed by Ted Nicolau and stars Diane Franklin, Gerrit Graham, Mary Woronoc, Chad Allen, Jon Gries and Bert Remsen.

On our second episode of Rotted we talk about the zero percent on Rotten Tomatoes rated Return of the Living Dead II from 1988. We ponder:

Why did they think that doing a soft reboot the first film but having more kids and comedy would work? 

What's up with that Michael Jackson?

Why is comedian Doug Benson one of the zombies?

Why on the making of commentary do the creators just talk about how awful the film is?

They did make some great zombies though.

Our mission on Rotted Podcast is to find the kernel of corn in the turds but the entire premise gets tested on our first episode.

Return of the Living Dead 2 Synopsis: Curious kids unearth the barrels that helped revive the dead of the first film, which proves the second time's an undead charm.

Join us as we dissect the 2014 Christmas Classic Saving Christmas starring Kirk Cameron and his ego. The film has the distinction of being #1 on IMDB's worst films of all time and like all our films we review has a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes.

Our mission on Rotted Podcast is to find the kernel of corn in the turds but the entire premise gets tested on our first episode.

IMDB Summary: Kirk is enjoying the annual Christmas party extravaganza thrown by his sister until he realizes he needs to help out Christian, his brother-in-law, who has a bad case of the bah-humbugs.

Happy Holidays!

Merry Christmas!!!!!!!!