Ho ho—hey, wait a minute. Where’s my sandwich? It was right here, next to my thermos of eggnog, and now it’s gone. *Gone!* I’ll bet anything one of those mischievous reindeer nabbed it again. They’ve got no boundaries! Dasher’s always sneaking into my lunchbox, and don’t even get me started on Prancer. But enough about my *sandwich drama*—let’s talk about something festive, spooky, and filled with far fewer hungry reindeer. 

This week, on a holly-jolly episode of *The Rotten Horror Picture Show Podcast*, Clay and Amanda are getting into the holiday spirit with the 2021 horror film *The Advent Calendar*. What’s that, you ask? A horror movie about one of those countdown calendars stuffed with chocolate? Not exactly. This one’s got curses, creepy little doors, and choices that’ll make you think twice before you start popping candy out of a festive box. It’s a chilling twist on holiday cheer, perfect for those of us who like our Christmas celebrations with a side of terror. 

Clay and Amanda, as always, bring the perfect mix of wit and insight to this yuletide horror gem. They’ll break down the film’s unique premise, its surprisingly emotional core, and whether an evil advent calendar is scarier than the family drama that usually accompanies the holidays. Spoiler: it might be.

So, grab your cocoa (but guard your snacks—trust me), and join Clay and Amanda for a festive fright fest that’s sure to deck the halls with screams and existential dread. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a very suspicious-looking Rudolph to interrogate. Seriously, who steals a Santa impersonator’s sandwich? That’s *not* in the holiday spirit. Anyway… enjoy the show!

www.patreon.com/thepenskyfile

Ladies and gentlemen… step right up—if you *dare*—to the newest episode of *The Rotten Horror Picture Show*! But, uh… if it’s all the same to you, I’ll be keeping a *safe distance* because Clay and Amanda are diving into Tod Browning’s 1932 cult classic *Freaks*, and just hearing the word “circus” gives me chills. Why? Clowns. Yep, clowns. I’m not ashamed to admit it—they freak me out. Those painted-on smiles? The oversized shoes? The sinister laughter? Nope. Hard pass.

Sure, *Freaks* isn’t exactly about clowns, but it’s still set in a circus, and that’s close enough for me. Directed by the same man who gave us *Dracula*, Tod Browning’s film is infamous for its raw portrayal of carnival life and its controversial depiction of sideshow performers. Clay and Amanda are here to break down why this movie, banned in many places when it first came out, has become a cult classic over the years. They’ll explore the film’s themes of acceptance, betrayal, and what really makes someone a “freak.”

But, seriously, can we talk about how *Freaks* doesn’t need clowns to be unsettling? It’s haunting enough on its own! From its unforgettable cast of real-life sideshow performers to its chilling “one of us” scene, this movie digs under your skin in a way no grease-painted nightmare ever could. Clay and Amanda will take you behind the curtain to explore how Browning pulled a fast one, promising horror but delivering human drama, and in the process created something so unique that it still resonates to this day.

So, if you love cult horror and want to hear Clay and Amanda dissect a true classic, tune in. But if any clowns show up, I’m out. You’ve been warned. Enjoy the show… while I hide under the nearest blanket.

Welcome, horror fans, to another spooky installment of *The Rotten Horror Picture Show*! Now, before we dive into the blood-soaked, mask-wearing madness, I have to admit—I'm a little… well, *disoriented* by the *Halloween* franchise at this point. So much so, I’m starting to wonder if *Michael Myers* himself is the one messing with our heads.

Here’s the deal: in this special episode, Clay and Amanda have decided to *revisit* their original coverage of *Halloween 2018*—which, to be fair, is an *excellent* choice, because that movie is a big deal in the *Halloween* timeline... I think. You see, it’s the one where Laurie Strode (played by Jamie Lee Curtis) is back, fighting to survive after all these years. But wait—didn't they already fight back in *Halloween H20*? And wasn’t there another Laurie vs. Michael showdown in *Resurrection*? But *Halloween 2018* ignores *those*, right? And now we’re supposed to pretend *those* never happened? *But* isn’t there also this new *continuity* in the mix—where *Halloween Kills* comes right after *Halloween 2018* but… *not* after *Halloween 2*? And then there's the *whole* thing about *Halloween Ends*, which is definitely the end, but… I’m pretty sure they said that about the last one too.

So, anyway, Clay and Amanda are here to remind us how all this started by revisiting *Halloween 2018*. They’re giving us the rundown before they drop their *Halloween Kills* episode on Patreon later this month. But first—please, someone, for the love of sanity—help me figure out which timeline we’re in now. Is this the one with *Danny McBride*, or the one with *Busta Rhymes*?

I guess we’ll find out soon enough!

Head over to www.patreon.com/thepenskyfile to listen to all the other Halloween episodes!

Welcome, dear listeners, to a new—wait, no, not new—episode of *The Rotten Horror Picture Show*. But… haven’t we done this before? I’m getting this overwhelming sense that we’ve all been here, in this exact moment, with Clay and Amanda, talking about *Bram Stoker’s Dracula*. The Halloween vibes, the eerie atmosphere, the Tarot cards… it’s like a foggy memory hovering just out of reach, but it feels so *familiar*. Like a dream I can’t wake up from. Or maybe a nightmare?

So, yes, it’s Halloween, and Amanda is reading Clay’s Tarot cards, diving into his fate and perhaps seeing glimpses of his future—or is it the past? And then there’s Francis Ford Coppola’s *Dracula*, that lavish, gothic fever dream from 1992. You know the one, right? With Gary Oldman as the immortal count, a cursed soul searching for lost love through centuries, doomed to repeat the same tragic cycle again and again… kind of like how I feel about this episode. Have we already talked about Dracula’s Victorian decadence? The exquisite costumes? That eerie sense of impending doom? I could *swear* we have.

But maybe that’s what *Dracula* does to you. It haunts you, gets under your skin, makes you feel as though you’re eternally circling back to it, like the undead himself. This episode promises blood, horror, and that seductive Coppola flair, and I *know* Clay and Amanda have a lot to say. I think I remember their thoughts on Oldman’s Dracula, the wild accents, and Winona Ryder’s intense gaze, as if I’ve heard it all before.

So, if you, too, feel like you’ve been here before, listening to *The Rotten Horror Picture Show* under the spell of *Dracula*, maybe it’s fate. Or maybe, just maybe, *this* episode was always meant to happen… again.

Alright, everyone, welcome to a brand-new episode of *The Rotten Horror Picture Show*! But before we get into it, I just gotta ask—what’s the deal with this movie *Barbarian*? I mean, you hear that title, and your mind immediately goes to one of three things: historical barbarians with giant axes, Conan the Barbarian swinging his sword around, or at the very least, the WWF wrestler, The Barbarian, smashing skulls in the ring. So imagine my disappointment when Clay and Amanda tell me we’re covering the 2022 horror movie *Barbarian*, and… not a single one of those things is in the movie! Not one!

What kind of bait-and-switch is this? I was all hyped up for some gnarly, sword-wielding chaos. But no, instead, we’ve got a suspenseful, tense horror movie that’s more about a creepy house and sinister secrets than pillaging warriors or muscle-bound wrestlers. Now, don’t get me wrong—Clay and Amanda are going to dive into what makes *Barbarian* such an unsettling, effective horror movie. They’ll break down its twists and turns, the tension that builds throughout the film, and the way it subverts your expectations. (And trust me, my expectations were *definitely* subverted.)

The movie stars Georgina Campbell, Bill Skarsgård, and Justin Long, and let me tell you, it gets *wild*. The story starts off simple—someone books an Airbnb—but quickly spirals into something much darker and more disturbing. And while there may not be any actual barbarians rampaging through the plot, Clay and Amanda are here to help you navigate this twisty horror flick and figure out what makes it so terrifying.

So, tune in for the discussion, but be prepared—this *Barbarian* is way more psychological horror than axe-swinging action. And if you were hoping for a Conan cameo like I was… well, you might want to adjust your expectations.

Enjoy the show!

*sigh* Alright, folks, welcome to another episode of *The Rotten Horror Picture Show*… though, to be honest, I’m not really in the mood. See, Clay and Amanda are talking about the 2022 horror movie *Smile*, but you know who *isn't* smiling? Me. You want to know why? I just dropped my sandwich—*my perfect sandwich*—all over the floor. And it wasn’t just any sandwich, no. This was a big, expensive sandwich, packed with all the good stuff: deli meats, fancy cheeses, some artisanal mustard. Now it’s all just… gone. Just like that. And now I’ve got nothing for lunch. *Nothing.* So yeah, it’s a little hard to get excited about a movie called *Smile* when the universe is clearly out to ruin my day.

But hey, I guess Clay and Amanda are still smiling, and they’re ready to dive deep into this modern horror flick that’s been sending shivers down everyone’s spines. *Smile* is all about this cursed grin—no, seriously—that haunts people and drives them to madness. Kinda like how I’m *this* close to losing it after watching my lunch hit the floor in slow motion. They’ll talk about the creepy premise, the unsettling tension, and how the film uses something as innocent as a smile to create real, visceral fear.

You know, maybe I could use this movie right now. Something to distract me from the fact that I’m going to be hungry all afternoon, and I can't just walk out and get another sandwich because *those things aren’t cheap.* So yeah, if you’re in the mood for a movie that’ll make your skin crawl—and maybe make you question why something as simple as a smile can be so terrifying—tune in. As for me, I’m gonna try to pick the pieces of my life (and my sandwich) back up.

Enjoy the show.

Well, well, well, it’s that time of year again, isn’t it? The leaves are turning, the nights are getting longer, and the air’s filled with the scent of pumpkin spice… and a touch of fear. But wait a minute! I’m just a humble pumpkin, and while everyone’s getting all excited about Halloween, I can’t help but feel a bit, uh, uneasy about it. I mean, you all know what happens to pumpkins like me, right? Yeah, you guessed it—we get carved up into Jack O’Lanterns! It’s only September, so can we maybe hold off on celebrating for just a little bit longer?

Anyway, speaking of Halloween (the season, not my impending doom), Clay and Amanda are about to drop a very special episode of The Rotten Horror Picture Show Podcast. They’re giving listeners an exclusive preview of their Patreon series covering the entire *Halloween* franchise by talking about the one that started it all—the original 1978 John Carpenter classic *Halloween*. Now, I’ll admit, even though I’m a bit on edge about this whole season, there’s no denying the impact of this film. Michael Myers, the music, Jamie Lee Curtis—it’s all iconic. But, y’know, could we maybe focus on that instead of sharpening knives and scooping out pumpkin guts?

In this episode, Clay and Amanda dive deep into what makes *Halloween* the defining slasher movie of its time. They’ll explore Carpenter’s masterful direction, the tension-building score, and the legacy of the unstoppable Michael Myers. It’s a must-listen for horror fans, especially those who are gearing up for the spooky season.

If you'd like to hear more of their spooky Halloween coverage, head on over to patreon.com/thepenskyfile and follow along. But as for me? I’ll be over here in the pumpkin patch, hoping you’ll hold off on the carving a little longer. Just enjoy the show, okay? Let’s not rush into the Jack O’Lantern business… I’m still in one piece, after all!

Ah, jeez. I knew something was up when the elevators started bleeding, but this? This is a whole other level of cleanup nightmare. Welcome, folks, to a brand-new episode of *The Rotten Horror Picture Show*, where Clay and Amanda are wrapping up their Summer Cabin Series in the most *gory* way possible. This time, they’re talking about the latest gut-wrenching, deadite-filled entry into the Evil Dead franchise: *Evil Dead Rise*, directed by Lee Cronin. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love a good horror movie, but who’s thinking about the poor guy that’s gotta scrub all the blood, guts, and *whatever that black goo is* off the walls?

In this 2023 rebootquel, instead of a cabin in the woods, we’re talking about an apartment building in the city. And let me tell you, from a janitor’s perspective, deadites in a high-rise building? That’s my worst nightmare. You think cleaning up after a tenant who leaves their laundry in the hallway is bad? Try mopping up after demons from the Necronomicon wreak havoc on a whole building full of families. Who’s gonna get the blood out of the carpet? *Me*, that’s who.

Clay and Amanda dive deep into this fresh take on the *Evil Dead* universe—no chainsaws in the woods this time, but don’t worry, it’s still got plenty of gore, terror, and deadite madness to keep you on the edge of your seat. They’ll talk about how *Evil Dead Rise* manages to take everything we love about the franchise—the relentless horror, over-the-top practical effects, and twisted humor—and drop it into an entirely new setting. It’s gritty, it’s gruesome, and it’s going to leave one hell of a mess.

So tune in, folks, and while you’re enjoying the carnage, spare a thought for the guy who’s gotta clean it all up. *That’s gonna take more than just a mop and bucket*.

Well, well, well, mortals and fiends, welcome to another bone-chilling episode of The Rotten Horror Picture Show! Today, our brave hosts, Clay and Amanda, are venturing into the dark, twisted woods once again, this time to dissect 2013’s *Evil Dead,* the Fede Alvarez remake of the iconic Sam Raimi classic. But wait just a demonic minute here… How in the name of all that’s unholy does an *Evil Dead* movie exist without Bruce Campbell? I mean, I’m a demon, and even I’m confused by this!

Listen, I’ve been tormenting souls and possessing bodies for centuries, and one thing I know is that *Evil Dead* means chainsaw-wielding, wisecracking Ash Williams. Bruce Campbell is *the* face (and the chin) of this franchise. So, when I heard there was an *Evil Dead* movie without him, I thought someone had summoned me as a joke. I mean, what’s next? A *Friday the 13th* without Jason? A *Nightmare on Elm Street* without Freddy? Madness!

Yet here we are, in a world where this *Evil Dead* exists, led by the fierce Jane Levy as Mia. Clay and Amanda are going to delve into this bloody, visceral remake, exploring how Alvarez managed to pay homage to the original while cranking up the gore and terror to eleven. They’ll discuss the intense performances, the updated lore, and the relentless, gut-wrenching horror that makes this remake stand on its own… even without Bruce.

But I’ll be lurking in the shadows, scratching my demonic head, still trying to wrap my mind around it. Can an *Evil Dead* movie truly thrive without its groovy hero? Tune in as Clay and Amanda conjure up their thoughts and summon answers to this perplexing question. Whether you’re a die-hard fan or a new initiate, this episode is sure to possess you. But beware… things might get messy without Bruce around to clean up the deadites.

Hail, noble listeners, and welcome to a new episode of The Rotten Horror Picture Show! Gather ’round the hearth as Clay and Amanda regale you with tales of heroic deeds, unspeakable horrors, and… another Bruce Campbell movie? Yes, indeed, today they delve into the chaotic, wild, and utterly entertaining world of Sam Raimi’s *Army of Darkness,* the third installment in the Evil Dead saga, where Campbell once again dons his armor (and his chainsaw) as the irrepressible Ash Williams.

Now, don’t get me wrong—I’m a knight of medieval England, and I’ve got a soft spot for tales of valor, undead battles, and all things Campbell. *Army of Darkness* has it all: skeleton armies, cursed books, and more one-liners than a court jester on ale night. It’s a rollicking adventure that takes Ash back to my time, where he must face off against evil in a land far removed from the cabin in the woods.

But here’s the thing: How many more Bruce Campbell films are we going to cover, good sirs and ladies? I get it—he’s a legend, the king of B-movie charm, and no one delivers a quip quite like him. Yet, even a knight such as I desires a bit of variety in his tales. I’ve slain dragons, rescued maidens, and faced the wrath of sorcerers, but sometimes I yearn for a different flavor of horror. Perhaps a cursed artifact from Egypt, or a tale of vengeful spirits from the Far East?

As Clay and Amanda discuss Ash’s medieval misadventures, I’ll be here polishing my armor and pondering the next battle. So, listen in, brave souls, as they dissect the humor, horror, and sheer madness of *Army of Darkness*. Just maybe, after this, we’ll ride into new territories of terror and mystery—something to whet the appetite of even the most seasoned knight.

But for now, to battle! Or, at least, to podcasting. Let’s see what mischief Ash gets into this time.