An Emotions Beat investigation about what silence sounds like when your rights are under attack. 

After Trump’s reelection, Sandy Ernest Allen watched attacks on trans rights escalate — and waited for more cis people to say something. Check in. Show up. Make noise. But mostly, he heard silence.

Then Sandy did something counterintuitive. Instead of asking why people didn’t care, he asked cis people what made them start caring about trans rights. Hundereds of people answered.

In this episode, Yowei and Sandy investigate what’s hiding inside the silence: overwhelm, shame, fear of saying the wrong thing or looking performative, and the dangerous assumption that someone else will handle it. And Sandy makes the case for allyship that is loud, imperfect, and badly needed.

From the episode: 

— Sandy Ernest Allen — writes the newsletter What's Helping Today:  www.sandyernestallen.com

— "To Cis People Who Feel Despair" — Sandy's guide to supporting trans people

— The post on Bluesky: @sandyernestallen

— Support Sandy's writing: https://buymeacoffee.com/sandyallen 

New to Proxy? Try Bisexual Wife Guy for a classic case, or Nicole Can’t Stop Being Aggro for another story about what it takes to keep caring when the world is horrifying. 

For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.

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