Segment City

Monopoly is a fun game (ok it isn’t really) but it can certainly lead to tension.

“1, 2, 3, aaaand it looks like you landed on my Park Place property. What have you got for me?”

“How about some bullets straight from my gun?”

This week on the podcast, the boys talk about the modern movie going experience, Theo’s thirst for high quality content, the new “Royalty Silencer” burger from Wayback Burger to call out Prince Harry’s new book, an attempted shooting caused by a Monopoly game, Chevy Chase’s bad reputation in Hollywood which led to one of the most embarrassing comedy roasts in history, and Will goes over one of the wildest hoaxes in history, full of masonry and thievery: the Cardiff Giant.

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Ok this is Theo writing this description and listen — I’m not insane. Teeth are a renewable resource. Will thinks I’m crazy but just think about it, people just keep letting these things fall out and we aren’t even using them!!

This week on the podcast Will introduces us to some truly bewildering Puritan names, and has a duo of “In the News” segments about a seemingly mild-mannered teacher getting into some bad business with a cartel, as well as a series of hitmen each lazier than the last. Theo pitches savory cupcakes to Will, and then proceeds to traumatize him with a truly horrific “Taxidermy Shop” segment.

Oh also — stay til the end of this one, the best joke is in the last 2 minutes, after we do the outro.

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Twitter: https://twitter.com/SegmentCity

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtOxbiSIX1NlSrNMLSqzFqQ

Happy Holidays from Segment City to all of you and a Happy New Year!

On this Holiday Special, Will and Theo talk about New Year's Resolutions, some “White People Phrases” we might try to add to our vernacular, terrible “Food Trends” that happened in 2022 (including “Pink Sauce”, “Nyquil Chicken”, “The Six Flags Meal Plan”, and much more) as well as calling out future trends. Like the Ghost of Christmas Present, Will goes over current holiday food news with the unveiling of Eggo Waffle Eggnog (aka Eggo Nog), Theo takes us through his “Rules for 2023”, and Will reads some “Amazon Erotica” descriptions including , “Christmas Lunch Romp”, “Off Limits Christmas Sleep”, “Grumpy Christmas Mountain Man”, “Four Mafia Kings for Christmas”, and more….

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Twitter: https://twitter.com/SegmentCity

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtOxbiSIX1NlSrNMLSqzFqQ

What does the Most American Cookie™ contain? Freedom. Fireworks. Flatulence. The big 3 F’s.

This week on the podcast Will and Theo discuss the official 2022 Word of the Year, and Theo brings the news of Subway’s Cookie… innovations? Is that the word we’re allowing them to use? Additionally, Theo quizzes Will in another edition of Is This the Onion?

Will has an In the News about Simon Cowell’s melting face, and a Conspiracy Query with some local relevance.

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Yes, it is people competing to construct furniture. Categories include: Any %, 100% Completion, and Furniture Elimination. We have already called “Dibs” on all rights to the idea for the sport, so no stealing!

This week on the podcast, Theo and Will talk about compliments that changed our behavior, Theo investigates the history of horny corporate account Tweets sparked by Nutter Butters’ recent thirst posts, Will and Theo interview Will’s friend Althea who details her idea for… Competitive Furniture Building? We get into rules, terminology,  corporate crossovers, and the Home Improvement Xtreme (HIX) Games. And Will goes into the history of the legendary “Furry Trout”!

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Twitter: https://twitter.com/SegmentCity

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtOxbiSIX1NlSrNMLSqzFqQ

This hog is going to MESS UP YOUR DAY! He’s fully kitted — glasses? Check. Beer? Check. Nunchucks? You better believe that’s a check.

This week on the podcast Will discovers Theo is a Scooby Doo villain when they discuss collecting masks. Theo runs through 2022’s hottest food themed pet names, and then brings Will down underground to visit the Taxidermy Shop. Will has a review of the hit blockbuster “Stop! Or my Mom Will Shoot!” which you won’t want to miss, and then talks us through some truly uncomfortable Furby glitches.

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Twitter: https://twitter.com/SegmentCity

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtOxbiSIX1NlSrNMLSqzFqQ

What do we know about Mark Wahlberg? Well, he’s from Boston. And that must mean he loves a good tea party. And that he loves Dunkin’. Oh, and of course that he has a troubled past and is struggling with inner demons.

On this week’s show, Will and Theo discuss a recent trip in which they witnessed the world’s biggest jump, Theo brings an edition of ‘Is this the Onion?’ and a synopsis of critically acclaimed movie ‘Zombeavers’. Will reads a typical manuscript of any movie set in Boston, and tells us about the great Spaghetti Tree Hoax.

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Twitter: https://twitter.com/SegmentCity

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtOxbiSIX1NlSrNMLSqzFqQ

Craigslist Missed Connections Ad: Man L4 Rotisserie Chicken that got away. 39 others did not, but can’t stop thinking about it. Bring me a rotisserie chicken and you may Observe the Consumption. 

This week on the podcast, the boys talk about how Will is getting better at conversation, Theo tells a tale about a modern Icarus who ate 40 chickens over 40 day and put up posters to advertise him eating the 40th one on an old pier, Will goes over a newstory of a fake bomb threat at their alma mater Northeastern University, Theo takes Will back to the “Texidermy Shop” to show off “Mickey Mouse” (who is definitely not a Mickey Mouse rip off), a frontier mouse, and a spooky low quality graveyard mouse threatened by a big hand, and Will regales us with the story of New Zealand’s 1930s exploding pants epidemic.

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Twitter: https://twitter.com/SegmentCity

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtOxbiSIX1NlSrNMLSqzFqQ

Hey man, stop being such a harsh realm and ruining all the grunge vibes. Wait what? These aren’t real terms? But I read the New York Times!

This week on the podcast Will takes us through the wild (and definitely true) glossary of terms used in the grunge music scene. Theo placates our deepest Thanksgiving fears thanks to the Butterball corporation, and brings a Wikipedia Historian segment about the wild history of Palisade, Nevada.

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Twitter: https://twitter.com/SegmentCity

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtOxbiSIX1NlSrNMLSqzFqQ

“Hey kids! Are you ready to eat the newest and nastiest food condiment from your favorite naughty card game company, Cards Against Humanity?”

“NO!”

“Haha great! And it even includes a special prize inside for whoever can reach it first…!”

This week on the podcast, Will and Theo talk visit iwaspoisoned.com which features all your food poisoning needs including user reports of when and where they got sick, Theo goes over Cards Against Humanity’s latest publicity stunt: Clam-O-Naise! The disgusting flavored mayo of yore (and by that I mean they gaslit Helman’s, the famed mayo company, into thinking they produced it at one point) and hid a card pack in each jar. Riffle through that mayo, kids! And if you’re lucky, you’ll get a card with a naughty word on it! Will then takes us through the history of Slimer and how he got his trademark disgusting look and Theo recounts the time people were worried about the deadly effects of Haley’s Comet in 1910. And Will goes over some leftover Halloween “Amazon Erotica” including the “Monsters Ever After” series.

Email us at [email protected]

Twitter: https://twitter.com/SegmentCity

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtOxbiSIX1NlSrNMLSqzFqQ