Single and Not Settling

This wasn't the episode I planned to record.

I wanted to record an episode to hype up single women at Christmas, reminding you that you are enough, that it is OK to be single and that your life has so much meaning and value. While I still believe that to be true, I didn't have it in me to show up that way this time.

So instead, I am being real with you...more so than usual.

In this episode, I share openly what the past few weeks have brought up for me, the triggers, the quiet grief, the reflection that comes when the year is ending and you find yourself questioning your life's alignment, your choices and where you are right now.

I share why I have pulled away from social media, how a short trip to Byron Bay shifted so much, who showed up back into my life during Mercury Retrograde and the clique advice about being in a "high vibration", "you create your own reality and can change it at any time". Single women are exhausted!

So, if you are ending 2025 feeling reflective, uncertain, and quietly question where you are at, this episode is for you.

No silver linings.

No trying to "fix things"

Just honesty, self compassion and permission to feel it all.

If this episode resonated with you, I would love to hear from you.

Connect with Vanessa Maree ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@vanessamaree_wingwoman⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow the podcast page ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@singleandnotsettling.podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Send an email to [email protected]

Download a copy of the FREE eBook "The Empowered Single Woman" ⁠here⁠ to transform your beliefs about dating and find the love you deserve.

Recently Vanessa Maree was interviewed by Terri Messenger for the Genius Zone Podcast.

In this transformational episode, Vanessa nudges you to become aware of your own outdated beliefs around love, relationships and being single.

Vanessa Maree shares her Soul Led Confidence pillars to help single women be ok with forming new connections and starting conversations with men (or anyone for that matter)!

Stay til the end when Vanessa Maree takes you through a meditation to remove the old and call in the new!

Connect with Vanessa Maree ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@vanessamaree_wingwoman⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow the podcast page ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@singleandnotsettling.podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Download a copy of the FREE eBook "The Empowered Single Woman" ⁠here⁠ to transform your beliefs about dating and find the love you deserve.

In this episode, Vanessa Maree sits down with the incredible Megan Gourlay, a heart-led matchmaker and the founder of Love With Me. Together, they explore what it really takes to find aligned love in today’s world, from mindset to emotional readiness to the practical steps of matchmaking.

Here’s what we dive into:

• From Corporate to Cupid, Megan opens up about her journey from the corporate world into matchmaking, what pulled her toward love, connection, and helping people meet their person.
• We get real. Megan shares the relationship and dating challenges that cracked her open (including an appearance on a popular dating reality TV show), shifted her path, and ultimately inspired her to guide others into healthier, aligned connections.
• Megan walks us step-by-step through how she gets to know her clients on a deep level. Their values, desires, and references and how she uses that to create intentional, compatible matches instead of surface-level pairings.
• If you’re a single woman who’s exhausted, jaded, or losing faith — Megan offers the grounded, compassionate truth that will help you reconnect to hope, self-worth, and possibility.

Also, stay tuned to the end as Vanessa Mare makes an announcement you do not want to miss!

Get in touch with Megan Gourlay here: www.lovewithme.com.au

Connect with Vanessa Maree and say hello! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@vanessamaree_wingwoman⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow the podcast page ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@singleandnotsettling.podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Download a copy of the FREE eBook "The Empowered Single Woman" ⁠here⁠ to transform your beliefs about dating and find the love you deserve.

I kick things off with a big heartfelt thank you toeveryone who reached out after my last episode. Your messages honestly meant so much. I give a little update on where I’m at — still moving through some things, but doing okay (promise!).

Then we get into the juicy stuff:

• How to meet men organically! I’m sharing everyday places where you can cross paths with men naturally. Plus, I give you a few simple conversation openers to make that first move feel effortless. Check out more onmy Instagram!

• Of course, the universe is still out here doing her thing…shifting people in and out of my world. I tell a funny story about one of those “good ones” and how I managed to completely stumble over my words (classic me).

• And finally — there’s a new red flag alert! 🚩It’s something that’s happened to me three times now, and every single time…the guy ghosted. So yep, it’s officially a pattern and something every singlewoman needs to know about.

💌 Share this episode with another single woman who needs to hear it — because this one might just save her some emotional energy (and a few eye rolls).

Connect with Vanessa Maree ⁠⁠⁠⁠@vanessamaree_wingwoman⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow the podcast page ⁠⁠⁠⁠@singleandnotsettling.podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠

Download a copy of the FREE eBook "The Empowered Single Woman" ⁠here⁠ to transform your beliefs about dating and find the love you deserve.

This one’s personal. Think of it as my dear diary moment. Raw, real, and unfiltered.

In this episode, I’m sharing:

• The latest update on the guy I’ve been dating (and yep, this is the stuff I didn’t share on social media 👀)

• The anxiety, overthinking, and self-awareness spiral thathad me questioning everything.

• Why I’m officially done trying to “figure it all out” orfind the spiritual meaning behind every situation.

• The cliche advice that’s honestly exhausting — from“everything happens for a reason” to burning letters under the full moon.

• What it’s been like to question if I’m even meant to have a relationship in this lifetime.

• Why I’m over the constant pressure to heal, level up, and be “high vibe” before love arrives.

• My new approach moving forward — I’m dating like a man.

• What this means for Single and Not Settling and how theenergy is shifting.

If you’ve ever felt deflated, frustrated, or just over the healing grind, this episode will hit home.

You’re not alone… and maybe it’s time we stop trying so hardto make sense of it all.

Did this episode resonate with you? Let me know as I have something I'm planning that you may want to be part of!

Connect with Vanessa Maree ⁠⁠⁠@vanessamaree_wingwoman⁠⁠⁠

Follow the podcast page ⁠⁠⁠@singleandnotsettling.podcast⁠⁠⁠

Or share this episode with a friend who might need to hear it today!

In this grounding and vulnerable conversation, Vanessa Mareesits down with Brad Barnett, a fire dancer, speaker, and man on a mission to be “a beacon of hope for women who have bad stories.”

Brad opens up about his past, including a pivotal momentthat changed how he shows up in relationships and life. He shares his journey from old patterns to self-awareness, and how choosing celibacy has helped him reconnect with his values and purpose.

Together, they unpack:

- What men really mean when they say they’re “too busy”or avoid emotional honesty.

- The importance of communication, respect, and taking accountability.

- Why women should honour themselves as divine beings — the portal of life — and stay discerning in who they allow into their energy.

- What it looks like when a man is genuinely doing the innerwork.

This conversation is a reminder that good men do exist…(evenVanessa Maree was a little lost for words at the end!!) and that healing and respect can come from both sides.

Tune in for a heartfelt conversation about growth, integrity, and the power of self-respect in modern dating and connection.

Connect with Brad and book him for private events:

@bradthefirebender

💌 If you loved this episode, I’d love for you to:

Connect with Vanessa Maree ⁠⁠⁠@vanessamaree_wingwoman⁠⁠⁠

Follow the podcast page ⁠⁠⁠@singleandnotsettling.podcast⁠⁠⁠

Or share this episode with a friend who might need to hear it today!

Download a copy of the FREE eBook "The Empowered Single Woman" ⁠here⁠ to transform your beliefs about dating and find the love you deserve.

"God showed you who they are — the next step is yours.”

That’s the quote Vanessa Maree is unpacking in today’s episode, along with other ways closure may come to you. This episode isn’t just about dating, but it is about heartbreak, the kind we don’t often talk about: losing friendships.

In this honest and heartfelt chat, Vanessa Maree opens up about:

- The grief of outgrowing friendships as we grow into new versions of ourselves.

- Realising when you have been removed from social media without notice.

- Reflecting and identifying other ways closure comes to you, that is not a conversation or reasons why.  Its the unspoken and observations that appear.

- How to hold the faith by envisioning what you do want your friendships to look and feel like, and creating affirmations to lean on when the grief hits.

By the end of this episode, you’ll feel less alone, lighter, and more anchored in your worth. Because not everyone is meant to walk with you into your next chapter and that’s okay.

So grab a tea, or pop in your headphones on your walk, and let’s talk about the friendships that end… and the freedom that comes after.

💌 If you loved this episode, I’d love for you to:

Connect with Vanessa Maree ⁠⁠@vanessamaree_wingwoman⁠⁠

Follow the podcast page ⁠⁠@singleandnotsettling.podcast⁠⁠

Or share this episode with a friend who might need to hear it today!

This episode is part two of my beautiful conversation with Lara Bokovay, where we continue diving deep into the energetic side of dating, intimacy, and connection.We explore:

• The energetic exchange during intimacy - what it means to invite someone into your energy field, and how to become discerning about who you allow into your space.
• Lara’s perspective on where dating is headed, given the challenges many people face with finger-pointing, old patterns, and cycles that keep repeating.
• Signs and synchronicities. How the universe is always guiding us, offering answers, and showing us that what is meant for us will never pass us by.
• Energetically connecting with your divine masculine or feminine counterpart, and how those connections can show up in your life even if they’re not physically beside you.
• Ways to tune into this connection even if you don’t consider yourself “psychic” or highly intuitive (yes, you can do this too!).

One of my favorite moments from our chat was when Lara asked “What does it feel like to be loved the way you want to be loved?”This episode is an invitation to reflect, trust, and lean into the deeper layers of love and connection.💌 If you haven’t listened to Part One yet, make sure you go back and catch it first!

This episode is your reminder that it’s okay to be single, it’s okay to wait, and it’s okay to hold onto the vision of the love you truly desire.

I sit down with coach, intuitive, and psychic Lara Bokovay, who shares her raw and inspiring journey of walking away from a five-year marriage, choosing celibacy for five years, and doing the deep inner work to heal her wounds and reconnect with her authentic self.

In this conversation, we explore:

• The power of asking yourself: How do you want to be loved? And are you ready to receive it?
• Why validation from men isn’t the same as alignment, and how universal redirection shows up.
• Healing the wounded feminine, unpacking family wounds, and reclaiming sovereignty.
• The truth about intimacy: physical closeness doesn’t equal emotional depth.
• Why being single is not a punishment, but a season to build your empire and strengthen your self-worth.

Most importantly, Lara shares her passionate belief in being patient and uncompromising when it comes to love. Her words are a permission slip for every single woman listening.

“Hold the vision of what you want for yourself, there is no compromise” 

“Acknowledge the ‘not right now,’ and keep living your life. What is meant for you will not pass you by.”

This episode is for the woman who needs the reminder that solitude is better than settling, that self-worth is found within, and that the right partner will meet you with clear intentions when the timing is divine.

Stay tuned for Part 2 of this conversation!

💌 If this conversation spoke to you:

Connect with Lara Bokovay and find out more about her work here: ⁠https://www.larabokovay.com/⁠

Connect with your host Vanessa Maree on Instagram @vanessamaree_wingwoman⁠⁠

Follow the podcast page ⁠⁠@singleandnotsettling.podcast⁠⁠

Share this episode with a friend who needs the reminder not to settle!

In this solo episode, I’m giving you an update on my recent singles event, sharing how Reiki has been a game-changer for opening my heart again, and revealing a little Hinge hack that has men sending the first message (yes, it’s actually working!).

Singles Events Update!

I talk about the beautiful connections that happen when people come together without pressure or expectation, like how walking in nature and not needing constant eye contact can ease nerves and open up real conversations. I share a story about a woman who hadn’t been on a date in a long time, and how just having a genuine chat with a man helped her build confidence again.

I also address one of the biggest misconceptions: that you’ll instantly meet your future husband at a singles event. Instead, I invite you to shift your perspective, these events are about opportunities. You might meet a new friend, a business collaborator, or another woman who becomes your wingwoman. By letting go of rigid expectations, you open yourself up to receiving exactly what you need in the moment.

Reiki Update!

Reiki has been paramount in my own journey of opening my heart. I share how Reiki helps dissolve stuck emotions, unblock your energy, and create space for connection. Beyond Reiki, I touch on other ways to open your heart, through kindness, compassion, gratitude, and simply being of service to others.

Finally, I share a fun discovery on the Hinge dating app: the way you word just one prompt can completely change the dynamic and make men feel safe enough to message you first. This little tweak has already been working for me, and I’ll tell you exactly how.

💌 If you loved this episode, I’d love for you to:

Connect with Vanessa Maree ⁠@vanessamaree_wingwoman⁠

Follow the podcast page ⁠@singleandnotsettling.podcast⁠ Or share this episode with a friend who might need to hear it today!