Beat the System

Hello, mystery fans, this week on Horse Mysteries, another installment of Horse Bits and then Lezah regales us with a story she’s calling Beat the System – a tale of horses, big money, and the top three most successful gamblers in modern history.

Lezah, horses and mysteries – it’s a real trifecta!

Thanks for listening.

As we mentioned during the episode, Horse Mysteries will be taking some time off, but we’ll return with more Horse Bits and more mysteries this fall. See you then!

Bill Benter

Allan Woods

Ed Thorp

Happy Valley Racecourse, in the heart of Hong Kong

This week: cat chat; foreign felines; stupid pet tics; trouble at the mill; faux-oreos; wrapped in plastic; orgy clean; bespectacled British jerk; routine angst; cool for cats; question challenge; enforced sleepover; young dads; new car smell; identity theft; locker room motors; fobbed off; made up words; jive Tolkein; huge dick fan; cat alarm; Goa’uld school; Baloo-nist; shake a paws; poking the mouse; seminal work; invitation to the hustle; it means something different; richest ducks; Top 5 Queen Songs (and it’s not what you think); Question of the Week – Sneakers respond; hi and byeeeee; too much chocolate; more important than good; office martyrs; shelved flavours; and, finally, the Beatles book.

Top 5 Queen Songs Pt. 1

* The City – “Snow Queen” – Now That Everything’s Been Said, 1968 – 1:56:11* Thee Oh Sees – “Poor Queen” – Mutilator Defeated At Last, 2015 – 2:03:16* The Fugs – “Queen of the Nile” – The Belle of Avenue A, 1969 – 2:07:38* The Spring Standards – “Queen of the Lot” – Would Things Be Different, 2010 – 2:16:32* Maggie Bell – “Queen of the Night” – Queen of the Night, 1974 – 2:21:10

Question of the Week: When you have friends and family over, what do you do together?Sub-question of the Week: If you won a million dollars, what’s the first thing you’d buy for yourself?

Thanks for listening.

Here is a picture of the book that was sort of about the Beatles that David remembered from his distant past thanks to Mark Dobrovolsky!

Hola, Sneakers! Welcome to Episode 542 of Sneaky Dragon, still remembering the podcasts of our youth!

This week: Easter’s keister; ice cream dreams; wasted opportunity; straight ham; funny deaths; schlongmeister; gone, but also forgotten; bulk erasure; transitional victims; no standards; characterless actors; puppy love; comedy bar; flame out; goodbye cool world; bohemian rhapsody; lying brain; coke-opted; life gap; embarrassing; all of my friends were there; meanies are everywhere; good intentions; on the road; do’s and don’t’s; wrong facts; on the table; acceptably drunk; rest in peace, Vancouver landmarks; No Fun at all; excellent fried cheese; Dork Shadows – The Girl in the Fireplace; Question of the Week – Sneakers respond; mystery cheat; can’t have nice things; Angrican; an offer you should refuse; artistic tics; yoga party; slim pickin’s; easily flattered; do the dog; old voice; supes of the day; Question questions; flavourtown; stepbirdmom; and, finally, sticks in the mud.

Question of the Week: when you finish work, is your workday over or do you have to bring your work home with you?Sub-question of the Week: What is your favourite flavour of ice cream?

Thanks for listening.

Follow the Money

Hello, horse mystery lovers, welcome to another episode of the podcast made just for you!

This week, Lezah recounts a sad story of broken trust, secret accounts, stolen money, and very expensive hobbies in a tale we’re calling “Follow the Money”.

Thanks for listening.

Hola, Sneakers! Welcome to Episode 539 of Sneaky Dragon, the podcast that gains weight!

This week: scary start; religious rite; nit picking, in defence of Judas; cock crows for a chicken; carry on; singing your life away; two-fisted ice cream cones; Lenten gelato; dessert toast; pulling mussels from the shell; sea wieners; expired powder; dried up vinegar; pedophile factories; nose lube; ear shaming; dizziness quotient; deviant nose; living in the passed; aquaman; new phoo; grumbles; elite dogs; wolf it up; we recommend: Everything, Everywhere, All At Once; sci-fi science vs. practically magic; super corn; Dave recommends: Why Didn’t They Ask Evans; Hollywood bods; aesthetic muscles; batmangled; turtle boner; Top 5 Radio Songs; Question of the Week – Sneakers respond; easy money; local cult; dad weight; save it for a rainy day; best worst job; pre-toxic; understanding the weak; yoga culture; Schroedinger’s library; and, finally, a French exit.

Top 5 Radio Songs

* Elvis Costello – “Radio Sweetheart” – Columbia Records single b-side to “Less Than Zero”, 1977 – 1:53:00* Loudon Wainwright III – “AM World” – Attempted Moustache, 1973 – 2:01:15* Sloan – “Listen to the Radio” – Never Hear the End of It, 2006 – 2:07:03* The Selecter – “On the Radio” – Two-Tone Records single b/w “Too Much Pressure”, 1979 – 2:15:42* The Slits – “FM” – Cut, 1979 – 2:23:14

Question of the Week: What book that you borrowed from the library as a child had a big impact on you?Sub-question of the Week: Do you do yoga? If so, what has it done for you?

Thanks for listening.

Department of Corections:

As usual, David was a little mixed up; this time concerning songs added or dropped from Elvis Costello albums. He stated that “Radio Radio” was added to Armed Forces, but it was actually added to This Year’s Model, which lost two great songs: “Night Rally” and “(I Don’t Want to Go to) Chelsea”. Armed Forces, on the other hand, was the album that lost “Sunday’s Best” in favour of “(What’s So Funny ‘Bout) Peace, Love and Understanding”. The three tracks were removed by the US record company, concerned that the songs were too British for American ears (or interests).

Hola, Sneakers! Welcome back to Sneaky Dragon, the podcast from the future of the past!

This week: numbers game; dried out; safety hands; publishing crawl; office copies; disappointing stationers; don’t quote me on this; tithed up; feather-weight; cynical giving; off-Broadway hymns; lowered expectations; megachurch; the real Oscar outrage; sucker punched; shine on, you crazy diamond; when life gives you Leno; done growing; grace herpes; skip to my Luigi; so tired; busy bees; nervous exhaustion; calling Dr. Google; falling apart is hard to do; stretching a point; nerd gym; lapping it up; TV workouts; virtually fun; vampire-free; zoo eye; acting Relic; here comes the judgement; idle music; all about pigmeat; going daffy; nary an Atari; Lil’Tractor; going mentor; gone prawn; Americans want shrimps; masked music; new catchphrases; totally fungible; and, finally, severance.

Question of the Week: What was your best work environment? And your worst?Sub-question of the Week: Are you a gym rat?

Thanks for listening.

Here is a comparison of Langely City in 2004 and 2019. Near the bottom of the top image in the centre, you can see the old SOS office supplies building and its weird property configuration. In the lower image, you can see the new road, plowed through the old property in all its odd, curvy glory. (As you can see, Langley City is too old to have been built on a road grid system.)

We referenced Shake Hands with Danger. If you haven’t seen it, check it out!

You can find Under the Influence here – a fascinating history of advertising hosted by Terry O’Reilly.

The Luck of the Irish

Hello, mystery fans, and welcome to another episode of Horse Mysteries.

This week Dave is confused by Lezah’s telling of a story we’re calling “The Luck of the Irish” – another story of human venality and cruelty with the added bonus of bumbling criminality.

We hope you enjoy this week’s mystery and thanks for listening

Hola, Sneakers! Welcome to Episode 539 of Sneaky Dragon – randomness personified!

This week: it’s curtains; small town girl; sentient logs; intelligent vision; small console-ation; cottage country; twenty years of nothin’; apologies to Dave Thomas; Bruno Gerussi’s mutton chops; king-sized; local discoveries; pub crawl; long and winding road; horses see horses; take a hint; the story continues; tough characters; Dave recommends the The Fifth Season; suspicious awards; added wizard shit; bear necessities; demonstrably clueless; murderous comedians; fun and movie games; white outrage; going wild; no leads; having a siege-ure; garbage of Mars; cover up; cat on the drums; family jewels; Top 5 Traffic songs; Questions of the Week – Sneakers respond; the sexual alignments of peanuts; an insupportable question; obsessing over obsessing; St. Paul; too much honesty; fully booked; smurfing your parents; truth in advertising; real narcissists; flower power; the long and winding yellow brick road; Dave recommends Cyrano; Beatle nut; mongoosed; and, finally, fuck Eeyore.

Top 5 Bad Traffic Songs:

* The Fredric – “Five O’Clock Traffic” – Evolution Records single b-side to “red Pier”, 1968 – 1:49:17* The Jasmine Minks – “Where the Traffic Goes” – Creation Records single b/w “Mr. Magic”, 1984 – 1:53:15* The Classics IV – “Traffic Jam” – Traces, 1969 – 1:58:39* XTC – “English Roundabout” – English Settlement, 1982 – 2:05:57* Jimi Hendrix – “Crosstown Traffic” – Electric Ladyland, 1969 – 2:08:36

Bonus track

* Bill Monroe – “Heavy Traffic Ahead” – Columbia Records single b/w “Along About Daybreak”, 1949 _ 2:15:21

Question of the Week: Have you ever travelled somewhere because you’d seen it in a movie or TV show or read about it in a book?Sub-question of the Week: Did you ever have mentor?Sub-sub-question of the Week: Have you ever had a bad vacation experience?

Thanks for listening.

Regis was kind enough to send along his ideal T-shirt message:

Chris Roberts provides definitive proof that Sparks 3 exists as well as some pictures of his beautiful family daffodil – and while not everyone has an heirloom daffodil, but it’s pretty easy to own Sparks 3: Future Purrfect!

Hola, Sneakers! Welcome to Episode 538 of the podcast that just doesn’t care what you think!

This week: friendly goats; animal sex; kingly duties; over-jokered; gifted child drama; bad tests; don’t ask me; sensitive moms; gifted fist; sausage school; educational narrowcast; enforced dance; long stretch; bitter consolation; plateaued; don’t give in, give out; whack-école; survival radar; high school yikes; sadness training; traumatic generations; no comparison; fun meet ups; gifted vs. narcissist; definitions; Dave is not a Musk bro; is Paul McCartney a narcissist; ambition is okay; a disappointment sandwich; low bar; sweet dreams; stupid inner voice; bad example; not a kid job; brain blocks; mentor as anything; the modern Dark Shadows; Dork Shadows – The Not Nice Man Cometh: pro-blood slaves; Hem-Haw; a dog’s tale; how to get ahead in advertising; fruit layer; sex in a pan; that burning feeling; sad children; the book of grievances; clip clop; crystal clear; movie food test kitchen; dark origins; chicken Disckens; a dollop of Trollope; and, finally, ball dropping.

Question of the Week: What was something you were obsessed with when you were young?Sub-question of the Week: What literary character is your hero or heroine?

Thanks for listening.

Peter Ayres sent along this excellent dance choreographed to Dave Brubeck’s tricky “Unsquare Dance” in 7/4 time. Enjoy!

There’s More Than One Criminal Type

Hello, mystery fans, and welcome to another episode of Horse Mysteries.

This week we return to the disreputable corners of the horse world for a story of vanity, fraud, greed, and murder in a story we’re calling “There’s More Than One Criminal Type”!

We hope you enjoy this week’s mystery and thanks for listening.