Solid Cat

It's the Morgan Freeman episode of Solid Cat, as we learn true facts about Morgan Freeman, and discover that D-mo can only do a impression of Morgan Freeman, saying "Morgan Freeman." But that's not all, Val begs the College of Cardinals to pick a blatantly heterosexual Pope, and we talk about how our daughter threw a full fledged tantrum in Tiffany's, you know, 'cause we're regulars and whatnot. Apparently there is an auction for sex with an inflatable sex doll that will be unveiled at the International Convention of Inflatable Dolls. You read that right, INTERNATIONAL CONVENTION OF INFLATABLE DOLLS. We read some of the dumbest sports quotes, we learn about sloths, and more Morgan Freeman. We play the Pyramid, we warn against Ureo's (the cheap knockoff of Oreo's) and we find out what Star Trek characters we are. Between Morgan Freeman and inflatable prostitution, we earned our Explicit tag this week. Morgan Freeman, Morgan Freeman.

In the episode of Solid Cat titled "Wood Porn," it shouldn't come as a surprise that it runs a little long (pun very much intended). We talk about Assassin's Creed (again... Val fears this will turn into the Assassin's Creed Podcast), with the upcoming AC 4: Black Flag. We say goodbye to the Pope, while debating the merits of suing the church. We are NOT going to Mars, but do play theme songs from THREE different Star Trek series. We talk about Norwegian wood, because apparently, the Norwegians are serious about their wood (not a joke, but it kind of is). We toss back some Shock Top Honeycrisp Apple Wheat beer in the Space Cowboy Kitchen's Booze Review (spoiler alert: it's very good), and we talk about Needles, California. On Solid Cat Game Night, we play Cliffhanger from The Price is Right, and we wrap up with a Paws Up and the most thorough research of porn stars ever. It's extensive, intensive, and has tons of well-design graphs. Oh, and there's kilts, too. In case you weren't sure, we're a little long... winded. What can we say, we like our wood and our porn. Wood Porn!

It's bacon, bacon, and more bacon on this week's episode of Solid Cat. We discuss bacon-crusted deli meats and bacon-topped maple bars. But there is more to the show than bacon (gasp). We briefly relive my time when D-mo wrestled under the name of "Sweet Breakfast Meat," though he also calls himself the Thomas Jefferson of podcasts (since he's fathered so many). We discover people really DO judge books by their covers, we cook up Funeral Potatoes in the Space Cowboy Kitchen, but ask that people stop trying to make sweet potatoes fries happen. On Game Night, we play the Feud, and lastly, we start a fund to buy D-mo a kilt. And he'd wear it, too.

It's the Hot Pope episode of Solid Cat. We're just going to say it, Valerie compared the Pope Benedict XVI resignation to Twilight. Seriously. Apparently, Benny 16 is Taylor Lautner, and the new hot pope will be Robert Pattinson. So says the Space Cowboy. She's ridiculous. But in the rest of the show, we talk about modern-day Australia being a post-apocalyptic wasteland, Val expresses her fear of super-volcanoes, Chubby Checker checks chubbies, and we briefly visit with the old show, Moonlighting. In our new feature, Solid Cat Game Night, we play The $25,000 Pyramid. We also touch on zombies and how to handle the zombie apocalypse. But it's really a pope-heavy show. We want to get #hotpope trending, we compares pimps and popes, and Val hopes the next pope is "The Edward Cullen of Popes." That just happened.

On this week's Solid Cat podcast, we celebrate the new year of the Snake and feature a whooping 3 segments from the Space Cowboy Kitchen to celebrate the new Lunar New Year. But that's not all. We profile the stereotypical Asian back-room gambler and we find out Val doesn't like Pai Gow. We learn Val's requirements for Chinatown hookers, and apparently, D-mo can't find Val's g-spot. We give our Top 10 Fortune Cookie fortunes (spoiler alert: Ask your mom), we explain the origin of the Solid Cat, and we unveil Chun Li, our new Chinese-bot. Oh, and we also brandish a fish, and it is "joyous." Happy New Year!

We have monarch abdicating and thieves smuggling diapers on this week's episode of Solid Cat. We convert people in the ways of chocolate milk, and take our tea, Earl Grey, hot! We lament the priciness of England, we tout our 4 year old's vast knowledge of Egyptology, and we delve deep into chocolate bars. Lots of them. It's comical how many we've tried and reviewed. But we do it for you guys, and not just our own perverted pleasures (that may or may not be true). #staysolid

On our big 30th episode of Solid Cat, we feature a retrospective featuring five of the funniest Solid Cat clips from all the previous podcasts. But that's not all. We talk about how Solid Cat has lasted longer than the entire 7th Dynasty of Egypt and the Anglo-Zanzibar War, combined. We lose some crocodiles and need 4 days to put out a cheese fire. We talk about Hempcon, and how Val got molested by an old guy at AdultCon. We have our first Moo's Review in the Space Cowboy Kitchen, Val finds musket use incredibly funny in Assassin's Creed III, and D-mo gets attacked by wolves and mountain lions. Happy 30th to us!

On this week's episode of Solid Cat, we take your favorite Solid Cat Podcast segments and combine them into one segment. We start with a News/From the Dojo segment, and finish with a Paws Up/Space Cowboy Kitchen segment. In between, D-mo creates the ABC's of the Internet, Val reviews The Hobbit, and Dave Coulier sings us a couple of songs. Then we do what we do best, we stumble through the finish and the show officially derails with Pigeonary and Bagzookas.