Sometimes In Life

What happens when we are triggered? and what to do about it to put ourselves back in control...

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And if you’re ready for a deeper journey and would like to work 1 on 1 on whatever is most important to you right now, I would love to support you. Just email [email protected].

To create change you need three things:

1⇢ You need to engage the heart.

Coz that's where real change happens. It's not enough to "know". The heart needs to be convinced before you and I can change our ways and create new ways.

2⇢ You need to create new narratives about who you are, who others are, what's happening around you and what's the meaning behind it, etc.

3 ⇢ You must be willing to walk through the shadows when they come.

Work with me?

www.noorahkareem.com/coaching

Noorah Kareem, is a certified narrative coach who's also specialized in emotional intelligence, personality types and certified in a few different assessments and 360's. She's been working with people for over four years now all the way from Saudi Arabia, Dubai, USA, and Japan.

What I learned:

1 ⇢ Sometimes in life, God doesn't give us what we want to test us to see what really lies in our chests and hearts

وَلِيَبْتَلِيَ اللَّهُ مَا فِي صُدُورِكُمْ وَلِيُمَحِّصَ مَا فِي قُلُوبِكُمْ ۗ وَاللَّهُ عَلِيمٌ بِذَاتِ الصُّدُورِ

(154) سورة العمران

"And let God test what is in your chests and check what is in your hearts"

2 ⇢ Choosing to worship God can come from two different places in the heart:

A- I did something for you God and now I am entitled to ___ (whatever that thing is that you're looking for is). This comes from a place of and doubt in the hearts. (Not our place to do that as slaves to The Master)

B- Or a place of a humble slave.

وَمِنَ النَّاسِ مَن يَعْبُدُ اللَّهَ عَلَى حَرْفٍ فَإِنْ أَصَابَهُ خَيْرٌ اطْمَأَنَّ بِهِ وَإِنْ أَصَابَتْهُ فِتْنَةٌ انقَلَبَ عَلَى وَجْهِهِ خَسِرَ الدُّنْيَا

وَالْآخِرَةَ ذَلِكَ هُوَ الْخُسْرَانُ الْمُبِين

( 11 ) سورة الحج

"There are among men some who serve Allah, as it were, on the verge: if good befalls them, they are, therewith, well content; but if a trial comes to them, they turn on their faces: they lose both this world and the Hereafter: that is loss for all to see!"

3 ⇢ The next time you find yourself in a hard situation, what do you want God to see in your heart?

Work with me 1-on-1: www.noorahkareem.com/coaching

وَإِذَا سَأَلَكَ عِبَادِي عَنِّي فَإِنِّي قَرِيبٌ ۖ أُجِيبُ دَعْوَةَ الدَّاعِ إِذَا دَعَانِ ۖ فَلْيَسْتَجِيبُوا لِي وَلْيُؤْمِنُوا بِي لَعَلَّهُمْ يَرْشُدُونَ

(186)سورة البقرة

"And if my slave asks you about me, I am indeed close I indeed answer the call of the caller. So they should try to respond to me and believe in me so they can be guided."

What I learned:

1 ⇢ God talks to us directly.

2 ⇢ God for sure answers our call but he also asks us for something in return: try to respond to Him. What I find amazing is God uses the word "they should TRY". He isnt askign for perfection,. He is askign fro effort.

3 ⇢ If you ever find yourself in a tough situation needing to comfort from Him. Use this aya to ask Him about Him.. But doent forget to put in the effort first.. try to repsond to him then ask Him about Him.

The way He responses (the HOW) it's up to HIm. (He is The Master and we are the slaves)

Get in touch with me: www.noorahkareem.com

What I learned:

2 ⇢ Self-disappointment is one of the worst feelings ever. That's why some of us choose to throw it as far away as possible! Discharge it by getting angry and blaming others "You made me do it- or not do it!? If only you did this, I would have_____." (Feel free to fill in the blank).

Others hold it too close and let it define who they are. "I'm a failure/ there's no hope for me"

2 ⇢ ٍRepentance/ توبة

can help you and I feel like our hearts have been cleaned again and take away the pain of self-disappointment.

3 ⇢ ٍSometimes in life, even when we repent from something we might still need to later down the line deal with consiquenses. As scary as that may sound right noe, it's OK... becouse God will be on your side making it easy for you and guidning you.

اللَّهُ وَلِيُّ الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا يُخْرِجُهُم مِّنَ الظُّلُمَاتِ إِلَى النُّورِ ۖ

(257) سورة البقرة

"God is a friend and supporter to those who believe and will bring them out of the darkness to the light"

He's your friend/ supporter ohhh AND He loves you...

إن الله يحب التوابين ويحب المتطهرين

(222) سورة البقرة

"And God loves those who repent and He loves those who cleanse themselves"

Visit me at: www.noorahkareem.com

وَإِذْ قَالَ رَبُّكَ لِلْمَلَائِكَةِ إِنِّي جَاعِلٌ فِي الْأَرْضِ خَلِيفَةً ۖ قَالُوا أَتَجْعَلُ فِيهَا مَن يُفْسِدُ فِيهَا وَيَسْفِكُ الدِّمَاءَ وَنَحْنُ نُسَبِّحُ بِحَمْدِكَ وَنُقَدِّسُ لَكَ ۖ قَالَ إِنِّي أَعْلَمُ مَا لَا تَعْلَمُونَ

سورة البقرة 30

"And when thy Lord said to the angels, I will make a land in the land as a caliph, saying, I will make those who spoil it and shed blood, and we will praise you, and sanctify you. He said, I know what you do not know."

What I learned:

⇢ Sometimes in life, things will happen that we can't understand. And it's normal to feel confused or want to understand the reason and wisdom behind it

⇢ Asking why is part of our nature but there are two ways to ask:

1- "why me God?/ this shouldn't be happening!?" this why the question comes from a place of ingratitude and rejecting the decree of Allah.

2- The way the prophets and angles asked God when they didn't understand something... by asking him WHILE declaring his perfection and their gratitude and praise. So it comes from a place of being humble and wanting him to shed light on what we cant, but we know whatever he does is flawless and thank you.

⇢ God sees good in us. That's why he created us. Because He knows the good that some of us will choose to do.

➖➖➖

For more visit: www.noorahkareem.com

More at: www.noorahkareem.com

What I Learned:

⇢ Assertiveness is a skill there for it can be taught and learned.

⇢ If we never choose to use our voice, with time we will start going into:

1- Passive aggressive behaviors

2- Aggressive behaviors

“أَمْ حَسِبَ الَّذِينَ فِي قُلُوبِهِم مَّرَضٌ أَن لَّن يُخْرِجَ اللَّهُ أَضْغَانَهُمْ “

⇢ How to find your voice?

1- Find your boundaries

2- get curious, ask the person questions then speak the difference (using "I" statements)

Book your time slot before it's gone: https://privatecoachingwithnoorah.as.me/schedule.php

Email me on: [email protected]

www.noorahkareem.com/

What I Learned:

⇢ There are two extreme ends of boundary types:

1- Too ridged: nothing comes in, and nothing goes out, strong need to protect self and a need to feel in control (so nothing hurts me and nothing unexpected happens)

2- Really loose boundaries (barely there): whatever you say go, it's up to you, I can't say no, and I'll deal with the consequences later.

⇢ God gave us human beings a space where we can choose there for it's not fair for us to dictate to others what they should do, feel, behave.. yes to guide and be there but we cant force. It was a space given by God.

( إِنَّا هَدَيْنَاهُ السَّبِيلَ إِمَّا شَاكِرًا وَإِمَّا كَفُورًا)

[ الإنسان: الآية 3 ]

⇢ The fact that God gave us choice means we also need to respect that responsibility in others (AND ourselves) that space is sacred.. take care of it.

Let's be honest everyone is going to annoy us. And we will do our share of annoying others as well.

What I learned:

⇢ Sometimes it's not about keeping quiet and bottling it up, because when we feel like the thing that hurts us keeps happening over and over again, we start thinking the other person doesn't care enough about us or why else would they keep doing what hurts us??

And what happens is that if we let those feelings pile it up inside of us with time, they will turn into resentment and resentment turns into rejection.

And Resentment and rejection hurt relationships.

⇢ So you may say "This is all great Noorah, but I really don't want to do that. I can deal with the hurt on my own, or I don't need anything from anyone I can manage my feelings on my own"

Maybe.. but let me share with you an Ayah from the Quran that speaks about this:

“أَمْ حَسِبَ الَّذِينَ فِي قُلُوبِهِم مَّرَضٌ أَن لَّن يُخْرِجَ اللَّهُ أَضْغَانَهُمْ “

"Did those who harbor ill feelings and sickness in their hearts think that God wouldn’t send them a situation that will expose it?"

It reinforced in me a reason to hold those honest conversations. Even if they are hard. Especially when I know that the ill feelings will be bottled-up on the inside of me.

Other resources:

• Get instant FREE access to video trainings on how to hold hard conversations. Email me at [email protected]

• Recommended book: The Dance of Connection: How to Talk to Someone When You're Mad, Hurt, Scared, Frustrated, Insulted, Betrayed, Or Desperate

• Email me directly to work one-on-one : [email protected]

May we know when to speak and may we be able to speak with wisdom when we do, 💛

Noorah