State Shifters Podcast

Join the Relationship SKool: 👉🏼 https://www.skool.com/relationshipskool/about?ref=896ce71dc10b47168e05736f72853cdc

Access my FREE 30-Day Email Course. Each day, you'll get one specific, actionable shift that creates immediate results:

Men Click here 👉🏼 jordan-candlish.kit.com/female30days

Women Click here 👉🏼 jordan-candlish.kit.com/male30days

Your partner IS nature - constantly moving, expressing, changing. When you embrace this rather than resist it, you create space for real connection.

Connect with me:

📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jordancandlish01/

🐦 Twitter: https://x.com/JordanCandlish

📱 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jordancandlish01

🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jordancandlish01

ABOUT ME

Jordan Candlish is a men's coach, speaker, and creator behind the Embodied Entrepreneur. A former semi-pro soccer player turned corporate escapee, Jordan helps high-performing men reconnect with purpose, master their emotions, and build a life that actually feels good—not just looks good on paper. His content blends mindset, embodiment, and spiritual

Alternative Titles:

• The Science of Emotions & Relationships | Huberman Lab Essentials
• How Not to Be Defensive in Relationships
• Emotional Detachment in Relationships - Sadia Khan

• The Trauma Response Killing Your Relationship

#EmotionalShutdown #RelationshipAdvice #TraumaResponse #NervousSystem #EmotionalIntelligence #RelationshipCoaching #MensRelationshipAdvice #HealthyRelationships #EmotionalHealing #RelationshipCommunication #FightFlightFreeze #TraumaHealing #RelationshipSkills #EmotionalMaturity #RelationshipGrowth #MensWork #CouplesCoaching

Join the Relationship SKool: 👉🏼 https://www.skool.com/relationshipskool/about?ref=896ce71dc10b47168e05736f72853cdc

Access my FREE 30-Day Email Course. Each day, you'll get one specific, actionable shift that creates immediate results:

Men Click here 👉🏼 jordan-candlish.kit.com/female30days

Women Click here 👉🏼 jordan-candlish.kit.com/male30days

What's up, legends? Got the whiteboard out today because we're breaking down why you emotionally shut down in relationships - and more importantly, what you can actually do about it.

This is the core of what makes or breaks your relationships. Not communication tactics, not date nights - your ability to stay emotionally open when things get intense.

Here's what we'll cover in this podcast episode:

✔️ The nervous system trauma responses (fight, flight, freeze, appease)

✔️ Why shutdown is instinctual survival, not personal failure

✔️ How your parents' relationship with emotion shaped yours

✔️ The difference between shutting down vs. slowing down

✔️ Why hearing the pain (not the blame) changes everything

✔️ New identity = new frequency = new reality

Your ability to stay emotionally open when things get intense is what makes or breaks relationships. Not communication tactics, not date nights - this right here.

The core truth: how someone feels around you determines the quality of every relationship in your life. When you shut down emotionally, the depth you can reach with your partner gets cut off immediately.

Most of us learned unhealthy emotional patterns from parents who weren't emotionally attuned themselves. They passed down unconscious behaviors around emotions, and now you're dealing with the consequences in your adult relationships.

Define your new response: Who do you need to be for the relationship you want? Someone responsive, clear, relaxed, and calm. Someone who leans into emotional intensity instead of resisting it.

The breakdown became the catalyst for breakthrough.

Remember: you don't practice this when things are going great. You practice your new identity when things go wrong. That's your training ground.

Connect with me:

📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jordancandlish01/

🐦 Twitter: https://x.com/JordanCandlish

📱 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jordancandlish01

🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jordancandlish01

ABOUT ME

Jordan Candlish is a men's coach, speaker, and creator behind the Embodied Entrepreneur. A former semi-pro soccer player turned corporate escapee, Jordan helps high-performing men reconnect with purpose, master their emotions, and build a life that actually feels good—not just looks good on paper. His content blends mindset, embodiment, and spiritual

Alternative Titles:

• The Science of Emotions & Relationships | Huberman Lab Essentials
• How Not to Be Defensive in Relationships
• Emotional Detachment in Relationships - Sadia Khan
• Why your Avoidant partner is Stonewalling you and how I Stopped doing it.
• The Trauma Response Killing Your Relationship

#EmotionalShutdown #RelationshipAdvice #TraumaResponse #NervousSystem #EmotionalIntelligence #RelationshipCoaching #MensRelationshipAdvice #HealthyRelationships #EmotionalHealing #RelationshipCommunication #FightFlightFreeze #TraumaHealing #RelationshipSkills #EmotionalMaturity #RelationshipGrowth #MensWork #CouplesCoaching

I’ve Coached 1,200 Men — Here’s What Kills Relationships 💔Join my men’s coaching group 👉🏼 https://embodied-entrepreneur-f2932d.webflow.io/program Access my FREE 30-Day Email Course. Each day, you'll get one specific, actionable shift that creates immediate results:Men Click here 👉🏼 jordan-candlish.kit.com/female30days Women Click here 👉🏼 jordan-candlish.kit.com/male30days After coaching over 1,200 high-performing men, I’ve discovered that what destroys relationships isn’t cheating or money — it’s emotional disconnection.In this video, I break down the three subtle yet powerful factors that kill relationships — and how to shift them starting today. You’ll learn how emotional leadership, vulnerability, and purpose can completely change how your partner feels around you.Here’s what you’ll learn:✨ Why overworking and emotional suppression destroy connection✨ The power of emotional expression and self-awareness✨ How to stop shutting down and start leading with presence✨ The importance of staying connected to your purpose and aliveness✨ Practical tools for regulating emotions and communicating truthfullyThis is for the men ready to stop losing love — and start leading with authenticity, depth, and confidence.🔔 Subscribe for more content on men’s growth, emotional mastery, and relationships.Connect with me:📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jordancandlish01/🐦 Twitter: https://x.com/JordanCandlish📱 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jordancandlish01🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jordancandlish01ABOUT ME:Jordan Candlish is a men's coach, speaker, and creator behind the Embodied Entrepreneur. A former semi-pro soccer player turned corporate escapee, Jordan helps high-performing men reconnect with purpose, master their emotions, and build a life that actually feels good—not just looks good on paper. His content blends mindset, embodiment, and spiritual depth to help men lead with heart, not just hustle.Timestamps:00:00 – Introduction: What Actually Kills Relationships02:15 – Overworking & Emotional Disconnection04:40 – Learning to Feel and Express Emotions07:10 – Building Emotional Awareness & Daily Check-Ins09:45 – The Importance of Safe Male Spaces12:00 – Shutting Down: The Silent Relationship Killer15:10 – How Avoidance Erodes Trust and Intimacy18:25 – Emotional Leadership and Regulation Practices21:30 – Staying Present During ConflictAlternative Titles:THIS is What Makes Someone Value YouWhy We Struggle to Leave RelationshipsDating Coach: #1 Sign You’ve Found the Right Person (Or If You’re SETTLING)How to know if your relationship is worth saving. #estherperel #relationship #therapyHow Friends And Family Can DESTROY Your RelationshipIf you think you’ll be single forever, watch THIS! ft. Matthew Hussey#MensGrowth #Relationships #MasculineLeadership #EmotionalIntelligence #MensWork #LoveAndGrowth #RelationshipAdvice #HighPerformingMen #SelfImprovement #EmotionalMastery #MindsetMatters #MasculineEnergy

Pursuing Purpose: The Secret to Thriving Relationships

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FREE 5-Day Email Course - Get one specific, actionable shift each day that creates immediate results: https://state-shifters.webflow.io/email-course

What if your purpose was the key to creating a deeper, more intimate, and thriving relationship? In this episode, I share how pursuing your higher purpose not only brings more meaning to your life but also transforms your relationships. From my coaching experiences to personal lessons, you'll learn how clarity, presence, and alignment with purpose directly shape the quality of love and connection you create with your partner.

In this episode, we'll cover:

• Why purpose is essential to intimacy and trust• The link between fulfillment and relationship success• Overcoming resistance and distractions• How to master presence and peace in the moment• Actionable steps to pursue your higher calling

The truth: Your love thrives when you thrive.

When you're disconnected from your purpose, that emptiness shows up in your relationship. You might seek validation from your partner, lose presence in intimate moments, or feel a nagging sense that something's missing. But when you're aligned with your calling and actively pursuing what matters most to you, you bring a completely different energy to your relationship.

Purpose gives you the clarity to show up fully. It creates the presence that deepens intimacy. It builds the trust that comes from being a man who knows where he's going and why.

This isn't about choosing between your purpose and your relationship. It's about understanding that they fuel each other. The more aligned you are with your calling, the more you have to give. The deeper your relationship becomes, the more it supports your growth.

Connect with Jordan:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jordancandlish01/Twitter: https://x.com/JordanCandlish

About Jordan Candlish:Jordan is a men's coach, speaker, and creator behind the Embodied Entrepreneur. A former semi-pro soccer player turned corporate escapee, Jordan helps high-performing men reconnect with purpose, master their emotions, and build a life that actually feels good—not just looks good on paper.

Alternative Titles:Women Love VALUE, Not Love – Why Most Men Get It WrongI Always Get What I Visualize In Only 3 Days Using This Belief System - Joe Dispenza MotivationThe Biggest Mistakes Women Make With Men (That Pushes Them Away) | E235 Lila Rose ShowWORLD'S #1 COUPLES THERAPIST: "If Your Partner Says THIS, the Relationship Is in TROUBLE!"LOVE EXPERT ON: When A Man TRULY LOVES You, He Will DO THIS! | Stephan Speaks & Jay ShettyDating Coach: #1 Sign You’ve Found the Right Person (Or If You’re SETTLING)#Purpose #Relationships #LoveAndGrowth #PersonalDevelopment #CouplesGoals #MindsetMatters #SelfImprovement #ThrivingRelationships #Intimacy #LifePurpose

Transforming Relationships: Principles for Deeper Love & Lasting Growth

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Access my FREE 5-Day Email Course. Each day, you'll get one specific, actionable shift that creates immediate results. Don't miss this - sign up now: https://state-shifters.webflow.io/email-course?

Are you ready to transform your relationship and experience deeper love, connection, and growth?

In this podcast, I share powerful principles inspired by Dr. Joe Dispenza’s teachings that helped me attract my dream partner and maintain a fulfilling relationship for over 10 years. These insights will show you how to:

✔️ Keep the spark alive

✔️ Build trust and intimacy

✔️ Stay in the “honeymoon phase”

✔️ Grow together through challenges

Whether you’re starting a new relationship or looking to strengthen an existing one, these timeless principles will help you create a love that lasts.

🔔 Subscribe for more podcasts on relationships, mindset, and personal growth!

Connect with me:📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jordancandlish01/

🐦 Twitter: https://x.com/JordanCandlish

📱 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jordancandlish01

🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jordancandlish01

ABOUT ME:

Jordan Candlish is a men's coach, speaker, and creator behind the Embodied Entrepreneur. A former semi-pro soccer player turned corporate escapee, Jordan helps high-performing men reconnect with purpose, master their emotions, and build a life that actually feels good—not just looks good on paper. His content blends mindset, embodiment, and spiritual depth to help men lead with heart, not just hustle.

Alternative Titles:

The Exact Joe Dispenza Strategies I Used to Manifest My Dream Life

Dr. Joe Dispenza: WATCH THIS To Rewire Your Brain & ATTRACT Anything You Want

These 3 Words Will Manifest Your Dreams into Reality! - Dr. Joe Dispenza

The 3 Principles I Used From Joe Dispenza To Manifest A Dream Role

How to Raise Your Vibration INSTANTLY and Manifest Your Dream Life - Dr. Joe Dispenza Motivation

I Always Get What I Visualize In Only 3 Days Using This Belief System - Joe Dispenza Motivation

#Relationships #LoveAndGrowth #PersonalDevelopment #CouplesGoals #SelfImprovement #RelationshipAdvice #MindsetMatters #JoeDispenzaInspired #Connection #LastingLove

The Relationship Skills Men Forget When Apart From Their Partner

Apply to work with me: https://bit.ly/3HoAy5T

FREE 5-Day Email Course - Get one specific, actionable shift each day that creates immediate results: https://state-shifters.webflow.io/email-course

What's up, legends? I just landed back in Lisbon after 5 weeks apart from Amanda, and I've had some eye-opening realizations about the relationship skills men often neglect - including myself. This episode breaks down what I rediscovered about leading in relationships when you've been out of practice.

Walking through beautiful Lisbon to meet Amanda, I'm reflecting on how even after years of coaching men on relationships, I found myself slipping back into old reactive patterns within days of being reunited. The muscle of relationship leadership had gone weak from disuse.

In this episode, I share:

• The #1 skill men must master: responsiveness over reactiveness
• Why your subconscious defaults to familiar defensive patterns
• How to catch yourself before damaging her nervous system
• The weekly feedback process that transforms relationships
• Why micro-moments of love matter more than grand gestures
• When and how to give your partner constructive feedback

Being apart from your partner - whether through travel, work, or just getting complacent - weakens the relationship muscle. You forget the extra level of awareness and attentiveness needed around communication, emotional needs, and daily connection.

Old patterns that resurface:

• Defensiveness when she brings up concerns
• Not speaking emotions and projecting anger instead
• Reacting from energetic overwhelm rather than conscious choice
• Forgetting to notice what she needs in specific moments

The solution is building responsiveness.

While responsiveness is crucial, you also need to address things that don't feel right. Don't withhold frustration - it stacks up and explodes later. Learn to say: "How you communicated that felt disconnected in my body. I need more grace/cooperation/softness. Would you be willing to try this approach instead?"

Remember: You can only give love to the level you're willing to receive it. If you're not nourishing yourself, you can't creatively love your partner.

This is ongoing work requiring constant refinement, contemplation, and mindfulness. Get complacent, and your subconscious defaults to familiar defensive patterns.

Connect with me:📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jordancandlish01/🐦 Twitter: https://x.com/JordanCandlish📱 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jordancandlish01🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jordancandlish01Alternative Titles:Controlling Your Reactivity | Q & A Eckhart TolleHow Do I Keep From Being Triggered? with Eckhart TolleHow to Be Less Emotionally Reactive: Black and White ThinkingThe #1 Relationship Skill Every Man Must Master (Responsiveness vs Reactiveness)stop being REACTIVE: master your EMOTIONS by becoming RESPONSIVE instead#RelationshipSkills #LongDistanceRelationship #RelationshipAdvice #MensRelationshipAdvice #RelationshipLeadership #MasculineLeadership #RelationshipCoaching #HealthyRelationships #RelationshipCommunication #EmotionalIntelligence #MensWork #RelationshipGrowth #CouplesCoaching #RelationshipTips #IntimateRelationships #RelationshipFoundations #MensDevelopment

Why She Doesn't Trust You (And How to Fix It)

Apply to work with me: https://bit.ly/3HoAy5T

FREE 5-Day Email Course - Get one specific, actionable shift each day that creates immediate results: https://state-shifters.webflow.io/email-course

Trust is broken in your relationship. Your partner questions everything you say and do. The emotional connection is disappearing, and no matter what you try, it never feels like enough. Sound familiar?

I've coached thousands of men through this exact situation. The harsh truth? You can't rebuild trust by changing what you do. You can only rebuild it by changing who you're being.

In this episode, I break down:

• Why broken trust always comes back to your relationship with yourself• The common mistake men make trying to "fix" trust through actions• How self-abandonment patterns destroy relationship trust• Why controlling your impulses is the foundation of trustworthiness• The father wound connection to broken promises and integrity issues• How your inner child affects your ability to show up consistently

Here's the reality: If you don't trust yourself, you can't expect others to trust you. Every broken promise to yourself - whether it's about health, habits, or behaviors - creates "leaky energy" that your partner feels as unsafe.

This isn't about perfection or never engaging in certain activities. It's about alignment. When your behaviors pull you away from being the person you need to be in your relationship, that's when dysfunction starts.

Practical steps to rebuild trust:

• Examine where you're not keeping your word with yourself• Identify what has control of your attention when you're weak• Connect to a larger purpose - your why for change• Address the inner child that's been abandoned through years of pushing through• Get accountability through coaching or men's groups

Often, men only change when their relationship is about to end. Don't wait for that point. Reflect on how much it would hurt to lose this person right now.

The level of safety someone feels in your presence comes down to how much you trust yourself. Fix that foundation, and everything else follows.

Connect with Jordan:📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jordancandlish01/🐦 Twitter: https://x.com/JordanCandlish📱 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jordancandlish01🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jordancandlish01
About Jordan Candlish:Jordan is a men's coach, speaker, and creator behind the Embodied Entrepreneur. A former semi-pro soccer player turned corporate escapee, Jordan helps high-performing men reconnect with purpose, master their emotions, and build a life that actually feels good—not just looks good on paper.

Alternative Titles:How to build (and rebuild) trust | Frances FreiRebuild Trust and Connection in Any Relationship | Tony Robbins InterventionHow To Rebuild Lost Trust In A RelationshipJordan Peterson: Fixing relationshipsHow to Regain Trust After You've Messed Up#RelationshipTrust #BrokenTrust #RelationshipAdvice #TrustIssues #RelationshipRepair #MensRelationshipAdvice #RelationshipCoaching #SelfTrust #Integrity #RelationshipHealing #MasculineLeadership #RelationshipProblems #TrustBuilding #RelationshipRecovery #HealthyRelationships #EmotionalSafety #RelationshipFoundations #MensWork #RelationshipGrowth #InnerWork #FatherWound #SelfIntegrity #RelationshipSkills #MensDevelopment #ConsciousRelationships

What makes a high value man?

Apply to work with me: https://bit.ly/3HoAy5T

FREE 5-Day Email Course - Get one specific, actionable shift each day that creates immediate results: https://state-shifters.webflow.io/email-course

In this powerful episode, I sit down with Adam Klai - a friend and someone who's become a huge inspiration in my journey. Adam has facilitated 83 workshops for over 2000 men, combining Orthodox Jewish wisdom with breakthrough emotional work. The depth of what we explore in this episode honestly changed my perspective on masculinity and spiritual practice.

Adam isn't just talking theory - he's living it. As a father to 10 children, he's maintaining ancient traditions while helping modern men break through their deepest patterns.

In this episode, we talked deeply about what men actually need to transform:

• Why ancient religious structures aren't outdated - they're essential for modern breakthroughs• The difference between feeling spiritual and actually practicing discipline• How childhood masks form and why integrating them (not destroying them) is the key• Why you'll never reach your potential without other men witnessing your growth• The uncomfortable truth about why life gets harder after you do the work• How to navigate the tests that come when you level up

The biggest takeaway: "Men don't change by knowing more - they change by feeling more." After years of consuming content, courses, and coaching, this conversation reminded me why nothing beats being in a room with other men doing the real work.

The integration piece is what most people miss. After a breakthrough, life often tests you harder. Your old patterns get triggered more intensely. This isn't failure - it's the universe checking if you're serious about this new version of yourself. Having the right support and perspective determines whether you grow or regress.

Adam shares stories that'll make you rethink everything - from the 6-year-old who got slapped for mispronouncing God's name to his own daughter teaching him about his triggers. The vulnerability in this conversation is what makes it powerful.

If you've been consuming men's work content but avoiding the real experience, this might be the wake-up call you need. There's only so much you can learn from podcasts and videos. At some point, you need to be witnessed by other men who are committed to growth.

Connect with Adam: @findinganochi (Instagram/YouTube)

Connect with me:📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jordancandlish01/🐦 Twitter: https://x.com/JordanCandlish📱 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jordancandlish01🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jordancandlish01About Me:Jordan Candlish is a men’s coach, speaker, and creator behind the Embodied Entrepreneur. A former semi-pro soccer player turned corporate escapee, Jordan helps high-performing men reconnect with purpose, master their emotions, and build a life that actually feels good—not just looks good on paper. His content blends mindset, embodiment, and spiritual depth to help men lead with heart, not just hustle.Alternative Titles:How to be a MAN: essential and performative masculinityMen Don't Change by Knowing More - They Change by Feeling MoreWhat Actually Transforms Masculine EnergyOrthodox Jewish Father of 10 Reveals Men's Transformation SecretsWhy Religious Structure Actually Accelerates Personal Growth#MensWork #MasculineDevelopment #SpiritualGrowth #PersonalDevelopment #JewishWisdom #MensRetreat #EmotionalHealing #MensCoaching #Vulnerability #MensCommunity #AncientWisdom #ModernTransformation #MasculineEnergy #SpiritualPractice #MensCircle #Embodiment #IntegrationWork #MensMentorship #EmotionalMasks #ChildhoodTrauma #MensSupport #ConsciousMasculinity

The One Thing Rich Entrepreneurs Do That Poor People Don't

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Access my FREE 5-Day Email Course. Each day, you'll get one specific, actionable shift that creates immediate results. Don't miss this - sign up now: https://state-shifters.webflow.io/ema...

What's up, legends? Coming to you live from Hollywood Boulevard after just walking out of Lewis Howes' Summit of Greatness. I've spent a week in LA at mastermind retreats and high-level events, and this podcast is about the most important skill you can develop: putting yourself in the right rooms.

This has been the pivotal factor in attracting the right opportunities and people into my life. Not courses, not books, not online content - proximity to the right people in the right environments.

Here's what I learned this week:

✔️ Life is moving you in a certain direction - learn to become sensitive to it

✔️ When opportunity knocks (like Jim Carter offering Lewis Howes tickets), just say yes✔️ Start with the WHO, then you'll understand the WHERE

✔️ You learn more through osmosis than any online course

✔️ If you can see it, it's becoming real

✔️ The right environment creates energetic shifts that unlock new thinking

The proximity principle: You collapse years of online learning into a three-day event when you're around the right people. This is why I run retreats now - transformation happens through proximity, not information.Your mind will say you don't have time, money, or can leave your responsibilities. Find a way anyway. In 2019, working at a meditation studio in Toronto, I couldn't afford Robin Sharma's $6000 Personal Mastery Academy. But by being in the right place, someone offered me free tickets. Synchronicities happen when you keep taking the next step.

The practical approach:

• Ask yourself: Who do I need to be around?
• Where does my heart come alive?
• What speaker, artist, or leader inspires you?
• Go see them in person - don't just consume online
• Follow the feeling of expansion as it pulls you

It's not about how to get there, it's about who can help you get there. The right connections, mentors, and environments accelerate your growth exponentially.

Connect with me:

📸 Instagram:   / jordancandlish01  

🐦 Twitter: https://x.com/JordanCandlish

📱 Facebook:   / jordancandlish01  

🎵 TikTok:   / jordancandlish01  

ABOUT ME

Jordan Candlish is a men's coach, speaker, and creator behind the Embodied Entrepreneur. A former semi-pro soccer player turned corporate escapee, Jordan helps high-performing men reconnect with purpose, master their emotions, and build a life that actually feels good—not just looks good on paper. His content blends mindset, embodiment, and spiritual depth to help men lead with heart, not just hustle.

Alternative Titles:

1. A clever way to motivate yourself

2. How to Network When You Have No Money or Connections

3. Mastermind Events: Are They Worth the Hype?

4. The Real Way to Meet Successful People (Not Online)

5. Why Proximity Beats Courses Every Time

6. The $6000 Event I Got Into for Free (And How You Can Too)

#RightRooms #Networking #PersonalDevelopment #Proximity #Opportunities #LewisHowes #SummitOfGreatness #Mastermind #BusinessNetworking #EntrepreneurLife #LA #Hollywood #PersonalGrowth #Success #Manifestation #Synchronicity #BusinessEvents #RobinSharma #AboveAndBeyond #Inspiration

The Relationship Skills Men Forget When Apart From Their Partner

Apply to work with me 👉🏼 https://bit.ly/3HoAy5T

Access my FREE 5-Day Email Course. Each day, you'll get one specific, actionable shift that creates immediate results. Don't miss this - sign up now: https://state-shifters.webflow.io/email-course?

What's up legends? Just landed back in Lisbon after 5 weeks apart from Amanda, and I've had some eye-opening realizations about the relationship skills men often neglect - including myself. This podcast breaks down what I rediscovered about leading in relationships when you've been out of practice.

Walking through beautiful Lisbon to meet Amanda, I'm reflecting on how even after years of coaching men on relationships, I found myself slipping back into old reactive patterns within days of being reunited. The muscle of relationship leadership had gone weak from disuse.

Here's what I learned:

✔️ The #1 skill men must master: responsiveness over reactiveness

✔️ Why your subconscious defaults to familiar defensive patterns

✔️ How to catch yourself before damaging her nervous system

✔️ The weekly feedback process that transforms relationships

✔️ Why micro-moments of love matter more than grand gestures

✔️ When and how to give your partner constructive feedback

Being apart from your partner - whether through travel, work, or just getting complacent - weakens the relationship muscle. You forget the extra level of awareness and attentiveness needed around communication, emotional needs, and daily connection. Then old patterns may start to resurface:

✔️Defensiveness when she brings up concerns

✔️Not speaking emotions and projecting anger instead

✔️Reacting from energetic overwhelm rather than conscious choice

✔️Forgetting to notice what she needs in specific moments

The solution is building responsiveness. While responsiveness is crucial, you also need to address things that don't feel right. Don't withhold frustration - it stacks up and explodes later.

Learn to say:

"How you communicated that felt disconnecting in my body. I need more grace/cooperation/softness. Would you be willing to try this approach instead?"

You can only give love to the level you're willing to receive it. If you're not nourishing yourself, you can't creatively love your partner.

This is ongoing work requiring constant refinement, contemplation, and mindfulness. Get complacent, and your subconscious defaults to familiar defensive patterns.

Connect with me:

📸 Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/jordancandlish01/

🐦 Twitter: https://x.com/JordanCandlish

📱 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jordancandlish01

🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jordancandlish01

ABOUT ME

Jordan Candlish is a men's coach, speaker, and creator behind the Embodied Entrepreneur. A former semi-pro soccer player turned corporate escapee, Jordan helps high-performing men reconnect with purpose, master their emotions, and build a life that actually feels good—not just looks good on paper. His content blends mindset, embodiment, and spiritual depth to help men lead with heart, not just hustle.

Alternative Titles:

• Controlling Your Reactivity | Q & A Eckhart Tolle
• How Do I Keep From Being Triggered? with Eckhart Tolle
• How to Be Less Emotionally Reactive: Black and White Thinking
• The #1 Relationship Skill Every Man Must Master (Responsiveness vs Reactiveness)
• stop being REACTIVE: master your EMOTIONS by becoming RESPONSIVE instead

#RelationshipSkills #LongDistanceRelationship #RelationshipAdvice #MensRelationshipAdvice #RelationshipLeadership #MasculineLeadership #RelationshipCoaching #HealthyRelationships #RelationshipCommunication #EmotionalIntelligence #MensWork #RelationshipGrowth #CouplesCoaching #RelationshipTips #IntimateRelationships #RelationshipFoundations #MensDevelopment #ConsciousRelationships #RelationshipGoals #LoveLanguage