Stupid Fat Hobbits

The third and final part of the trilogy. The following guests join the show: Shaun "Blarshe" Pacious, Monica "Spends her parents' hard-earned money at 7-Eleven" Pacious; Ryan "Guest episode bombed" Bartels; and Josh "Ip Man" Clarke. We continue to ask the hard-hitting questions that the world has been clamoring for. As this 4-hour extravaganza comes to a close, we are utterly exhausted from talking to so many peasants for so long. If we can recover from this, join us May 1st for Season 2!

The 2nd installment in the three-part season finale, otherwise known as "The Johnny Gets Roasted Trilogy." Guests include long-time listener Chris Beatty; big corn fan Sarah Meehan; legendary bartender and breadman Michael Loria; Downtown-Hashbrownz Willie Brown, and...Billy Himpler, poop joke enthusiast.

It's the final episode of Season 1!! We decided to take live calls from our fans to end Season 1 with a bang which turned into a three and a half-hour extravaganza. An occasion of merriment and much gravitas. The gracious peasants who called in did not disappoint in the slightest and gave us many a chuckle. Due to the high demand to be on the show and our desire to take every call we received, we decided to break the finale up into 3 episodes all filled with the voices of the people insulting Johnny. We thoroughly enjoyed it. So sit back, relax and tune in to hear your fellow common man join the lads in the studio on the very anticipated and hoped for ending of Season 1. 

This is the first sponsored episode and probably the last. The lads are beginning to lose it. In an attempt to stay fresh and provide variety, they turned to a free-form episode. No segments -- slam poetry, if you will. There are no rules in quarantine.  Johnny gives an important historical anecdote concerning carrots. The lads discuss their various activities in quarantine, including Pat and Chris taking on Johnny in an epic chess match. The lads discuss the rise of Tiger King and create a new Carole Baskin segment. Carole Baskin killed her husband. Somehow, the lads wriggle into worm territory. Pat watches Good Will Hunting for the first time, which angers Chris, who is concerned about classic movie privilege. Carole Baskin killed her husband. Flubber and Alladin are pitted against each other in a battle of "classics." Chris and Johnny sing a pedantic and aggressive lullaby toward Pat to make him see the light. Johnny is an animal abuser. Johnny also wants to make smooth jazz. Johnny says vibe. Carole Baskin killed her husband. Chris explains what Rocket League is to the unsuspecting listener. Send us your movie submissions and funny quarantine videos if you so desire. Contact us here - Email: [email protected]
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sfh_podcast/ Twitter: @sfh_podcast. Carole Baskin killed her husband.

In this week's episode, Johnny plays the victim almost immediately (as usual, what a loser). The lads again implore the audience for random content and lament the trials and tribulations of quarantine. Puns are afoot. The Intellectual names Johnny the captain of the ship and Chris, the helmsman (still scratching our heads on this). The podcast moves on to Johnny's Corner which explores the secrets of silent fighting. And in Imagine If, what the hell would drunk white girls sing at the end of the night if "Mr. Brightside" didn't exist? Oh, and Johnny hates soup. To end the episode, Pat absolutely eviscerates Johnny in "Guess the Quote". He's still licking his wounds from this beat down.

On our first quarantine show, pickles and sickles tickle the fickle nickel in an unbridled trickle. Johnny casts down all those who enjoy their steaks well-done. Does anyone know the difference between myoglobin and hemoglobin? Are puns the lowest form of comedy? Do you enjoy them? Meanwhile, Chris traverses the lonely road to insanity. On the cusp, Chris desperately clings to his idea of wisdom by giving a tomato "metaphor." Breaking News From Florida sees a limbless cutthroat rolling away from law enforcement. The lads explore the intricacies of the medical drama. Old jokes are brought to the fore. The lads scrutinize the work of the Progressive actor named Ashland? Jeremy? Jared? Who knows. Around the Table explores whether "living the 'tine" should be a phrase used in common parlance. Chris and Johnny are proud of their unclehood, and Pat, his stunclehood. Johnny explains the Bull Moose drinking tradition. The Intellectual makes a bold bet. Johnny denigrates the skiing skills of The Intellectual, which obviously leads the lads to review the greatest bagel shmears. The lads examine the three things Johnny and Pat most enjoy in their lives which leads to an examination of Pat and Chris living together in quarantine. Follow us on twitter https://twitter.com/sfh_podcast to watch Chris give a topical rendition of Red Is The Rose.

The lads begin this week's episode on a very polarizing topic: whose laugh is best? It's not Pat's. They then contemplate destroying the podcast altogether (literally destroying). Chris falls through clouds and apparently forces his co-workers to do Winnie the Pooh reenactments. The Intellectual then discovers he is wearing the same socks from episode 1, which reminds him to burn them ASAP. Chris doesn't sleep well. Johnny then rights the ship and takes us into Breaking News From Florida, where a man turns himself in for killing his imaginary friend, Happy. Johnny and Pat then gang up on Chris (per usual) and criticize his decision to vest vests. Chris defends his honor but loses in the end. Johnny is apparently obsessed with hangers. Johnny then continues his unprecedented guidance of the show and takes us into Johnny's corner where he speaks of dead Toy Story toys and weezerless Wheezys. Chris makes some terrible puns. The lads then cap off the show with a little Lord of The Rings Impersonation Contest, WITH A TWIST (clickbait). Mid-contest, a tangent ensues, however, and the lads try and determine where the LOTR's one F-bomb would have been if it had been used. In the end, cooler heads prevail, and the contest is finished...Try and guess who won. 

A guest joins today's show. Her name? Betsy Reig. Her background? Spain. And boyfriends. And Miller Lite. The lads and lass (ladssies?) discuss the very topical Corona beer, which is obviously the catalyst of the virus. Various social interactions and alcohol preferences are discussed which you guys won't care about. Chris is put in his rightful place as usual. No one has any idea what To Kill a Mockingbird was about. The guest arrives ready to shred some gnar. Russia and Iran join the listener base. The crew explores Betsy's "Barthelonian" roots. Breaking News from Florida sees the courtroom heat up in more ways than one. Betsy's Guest Segment investigates the proper path for cutting out social media and brings about a cascade of creative ideas. Johnny's Corner leads us into open pastures and senseless slaughter. PSA: We do not hate vegans. Only Betsy does. Pat also somehow found the Sake version of Whiteclaw. In Do You Have What It Takes to Be an Intellectual, Pat and Chris challenge Betsy in a Grand Inquisition...Betsy threatens The Intellectual. Listen through the outro to hear the ultimate Spanish-American anthem.

A caller rudely interrupts the show. Do hobbits eat berries? The twitter contest winners are announced. Shout out to Cormac Goodwin for designing the first ever SFH t-shirt. Johnny pauses the show in a desperate gamble to retain his intellectuality from last episode. The Intellectual gives closing ceremony remarks. Johnny's Corner continues the theme of lies and deceit. Chris thinks Pinnochio takes place in Norway. Chris also thinks having a big nose gives you an advantage in soccer.  Around the Table delves into the social fabric of artificial train communities. Imagine If takes us back to the time of Jefferson and smallpox. 

Chris likes to stuff socks in his pants. The LOTR Impersonation contest sees Johnny give the worst Gollum impression of all time. Johnny's Corner gives rise to a rather brief but serious look into the failings of the Hobbit--The Intellectual seizes his moment. Chris finds another gem on Amazon concerning hairspray. Emboldened by his comedic discovery, Chris tries to take control of "Do You Have What It Takes to Be an Intellectual?" Johnny takes a hop into the world of beer and attempts to accomplish the unthinkable. Follow us on all the tweetstagrams if you so desire.