Sweet Feathery Jesus!

Featuring: Booze and Chuck Turtleman

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Whaaaat's up, my honkies?

On this very special episode of the SFJ podcast, we're a man down. It seems Beardo has gone away for an in no way highly suspicious males only weekend on which no women were allowed. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Here at Sweet Feathery Jesus, we celebrate alternative lifestyles.

This leaves Booze and Turtleman to discuss a super food diet that doesn't seem to include any actual food, a mother of six who thinks she looks exactly like her sexy (her words, not ours) 14 year old daughter, a superhero dressed as a Baked Bean, and Marlee Matlin taking time out from the Super Bowl halftime show to like one of Booze's tweets.

Oh, and we revisit the time that everyone's favorite Idiot of Facebook, Friend Zone Frank! (yay) was actually ON THE PODCAST!

So open up a can of legumes in tomato sauce, pop on your leather cap & stick us in the front basket of your Rascal scooter. Let's boogie!

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Featuring: Beardo, Booze, Chuck Turtleman

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Whaaaat's up, my honkies?

What's that sound, you ask? Why, that's the New Idiot Alarm! That's right. On this very special episode of the Sweet Feathery Jesus Podcast, we introduce you to our brand new Idiot of Facebook… Kimly Chaos!*

Kimly is a very special lady, who loves her kids, presumably thinks cancer is bad, and enjoys getting engaged on an almost daily basis to internet gentlemen she entices with a blurry photograph of her "clevage".

Sadly and bafflingly, these relationships rarely seem to end on good terms, resulting in some very public arguments, death threats, pictures of weaponry and poorly spelled quotes from the bible.

The First World War was a terrible thing too, I'm sure we all agree. It did, however, lead to the birth of plastic surgery. I'm sure that if he were still with us, pioneering surgeon Sir Harold Gillies would look up from repairing the blown apart, caved-in face of a brave serviceman, and wipe away a tear of pride when he saw how his fledgling techniques eventually led to young stripper Kayla Morris being transformed from a normal looking girl into a cross between a barrage balloon and an upside down mandrill.

Meanwhile, Beardo gets flummoxed, Turtleman solves some more crimes, Booze impersonates a vicar and someone's mum has hands like an alien.

So saddle up your lovely horse and stick us in your ears. It's gonna be a wild ride! *Special thanks to listener Tommy for discovering Kimly.

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Featuring: Booze (rat), Chuck Turtleman (cock), and Beardo (ox)

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新年快乐, my honkies! That's right, the Happy New ChinaYear is upon us, and this time around, for the first time in the history of the SFJ podcast, it's the Happy New Chinese Year of the Chinese Chinamonkey! In keeping with this extremely auspicious occasion, we bring you this very special episode of the Sweet Feathery Jesus Podcast, which is focused on all things Chinesey and monkeyish.

In retaliation for the travesty that was Tiptoes, Booze and Beardo make Chuck Turtleman and his Internet Lady watch a beloved TV Japanese Chinashow from their youth, called "Monkey!", This show never aired in the US, and so Chuck was totally unaware of its very existence. Until now! It features Japanese Chinapeople depicting Chinese Chinapeople, overdubbed by British people doing a hilariously racist Chinese China-accent. Don't worry, there's also plenty of gleeful violence and attempted rape (it is a kids' show, after all!).

Professor Chuck Turtleman takes up the Chinese monkey copter, and brings us a veritable Chinese buffet of stories from the Chinese Chinaregions. We also feature one of the best Idiots of Facebook segments ever, when some of Friendzone Frank's "Bellas" turn on him in a cruel twist of fate that he totally did not bring upon himself by his own repeatedly stupid actions.

All this, more casual racism than you can poke a chopstick at, and the very special return of a fan-favourite former SFJ segment after a two-year hiatus, on this very special episode of SFJ!

So drill some ear holes in your lampshade-shaped monkey-sized Chinahat, and stick us right in there, nice and deep!

(Special thanks to Gravy!)

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Featuring: Booze (rat), Chuck Turtleman (cock), and Beardo (ox) 新年快乐, my honkies! That’s right, the Happy New ChinaYear is upon us, and this time around, for the first time in the history of the SFJ podcast, it’s the Happy New Chinese Year of the Chinese Chinamonkey! In keeping with this extremely auspicious occasion, we bring […]

Featuring: Booze, Beardo, Chuck TurtlemanProducer: Booze, Beardo, ChuckTurtleman

http://traffic.libsyn.com/sfjpodcast/20160115_SFJPOD_114.mp3

Whaaaaaat's up, my diminutive honkies? On this, very special little episode, we dissect the 2003 dwarf film, Tiptoes, starring Matthew Mahogany and Gary Old Man. Is this straight-to-DVD movie a stunning tour-de-force of cinematic brilliance, or a steaming abortion of a film? The answer probably won't surprise you.

Professor Turtleman takes up his miniature news copter and brings us four not-so-tall tales, all of which feature humans of less than regular stature. Having found a dwarf for Booze on a previous episode, we check in with Jemma Suicide and see what she's up to (or down for, as it were). Finally, to break with the theme, we check in with our not-so-little Idiot of Facebook, Friendzone Frank!

All that, a dwarf sex criminal, the Islamic State, and at least one mention of a monkey, in this very special episode of the Sweet Feathery Jesus Podcast. So stick it in your tiny little earholes, my honkies!

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Featuring:  Booze, Beardo, Chuck Turtleman Producer: Booze, Beardo, ChuckTurtleman Whaaaaaat’s up, my diminutive honkies? On this, very special little episode, we dissect the 2003 dwarf film, Tiptoes, starring Matthew Mahogany and Gary Old Man. Is this straight-to-DVD movie a stunning tour-de-force of cinematic brilliance, or a steaming abortion of a film? The answer probably won’t […]

Featuring: Belasco, Beardo, Chuck TurtlemanProducer: Beardo

http://traffic.libsyn.com/sfjpodcast/20151230_SFJPOD_113.mp3

Haaaaaaappy New Years, my honkies!

In this very special episode, Beardo takes us on a stroll down memory lane, and curates a collection of the best ever SFJ original songs. Remember when Lisa Bleepdo and Kenny Powers were reunited and it felt so good? Beardo remembers. Remember when Doctor Peay (RIP) took to the skies in his world-famous News Scooter (due to budget cuts)? Beardo remembers. Remember when a Chinese Chinaman's Chinapants got blown off by an exploding tractor tyre? Beardo Remembers.

All that, some KITTARDS, some casual racism and the monkey god Hanuman, on this very special episode of the Sweet Feathery Jesus Podcast! So stick us in your New Year-holes, my honkies!

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Featuring:  Belasco, Beardo, Chuck Turtleman Producer: Beardo Haaaaaaappy New Years, my honkies! In this very special episode, Beardo takes us on a stroll down memory lane, and curates a collection of the best ever SFJ original songs. Remember when Lisa Bleepdo and Kenny Powers were reunited and it felt so good? Beardo remembers. Remember when […]

Featuring: Belasco, Beardo, Chuck TurtlemanProducer: Booze, Beardo, Turtleman

http://traffic.libsyn.com/sfjpodcast/20151212_SFJPOD_112.mp3

Meeeeeerry Christmas, my ho ho honkies!

Ever wondered what Christmas is like in the Democratic People's Republic of North Korea?

Of course you have. Well, wonder no more. On this very special festive edition of Sweet Feathery Jesus, we talk, live via satellite, to an undercover correspondent embedded behind the Bamboo Curtain!

But not before we pay a musical tribute to our favourite Idiot of Facebook, Turtleman takes to the snowy skies in his Holiday Copter, Beardo embraces feminism & Booze is poisoned live on the podcast.

Also making our Yuletide gay is our old pal Dicky, who brings us a very special Christmas "Just the Tip", YouTube sensation Stefano, with a very special erotic Christmas song, and all the bang up to date brussels sprout news you can shake a sleigh bell at.

So pour yourself a disgusting drink you wouldn't even dream of imbibing for the rest of the year, gather the family around the tree and stick this in ALL your earholes. It's Christmas! (Special thanks to Sam from the Kimchi Chronicles and Strange Times, who really IS in Korea, you know. Although there's no way you'd be able to tell from listening to the podcast. We might as well have got Belasco to do one of his funny voices. It would've been a lot easier)

(Our favourite actress Shirley MacLaine is played by Gravy Hayes.)

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Featuring:  Belasco, Beardo, Chuck Turtleman Producer: Booze, Beardo, Turtleman   Meeeeeerry Christmas, my ho ho honkies! Ever wondered what Christmas is like in the Democratic People’s Republic of North Korea? Of course you have. Well, wonder no more. On this very special festive edition of Sweet Feathery Jesus, we talk, live via satellite, to an undercover […]