Tentpole Trauma

Less a directorial effort than a vehicle for his pop singer daughter, M. Night Shyamalan's latest high concept thriller, Trap, features Josh Hartnett in a cat and mouse game taking place at the concert of a Taylor Swift-style fictional diva. Does Night manage to recapture the magic of his Sixth Sense glory days, or is the nauseating nepotism on display coupled with a crushing parade of implausibilities too much for a hapless audience to bear? Join Sebastian and Rodney for this special mini-episode discussion on what could be the year's worst mainstream movie.

M.Night Shyamalan’s career was in the dumpster after the release of 2010’s The Last Airbender, so hitching his spaceship to superstar Will Smith seemed a smart move for his next project, 2013’s After Earth. Unfortunately the film proved more an excuse for nepotism as Smith was sidelined for his son Jayden, and rumors of Scientology’s alleged involvement didn’t help its prospects with audiences and critics. Join Sebastian and Rodney as they argue the merits of flying squirrel suits, cgi monkeys and this mess of a post apocalyptic father son adventure. 

After successfully resurrecting “The Shape” for Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers in 1988, producer and overlord Moustapha Akkad demanded a sequel the following year. The resulting film, boasting the Revenge of Michael Myers, was met with fan backlash and disappointment at the box office, falling to capitalize on the previous film’s murderous momentum. Join Sebastian and Bloody Bits co-host Matt Anderson as they carve into this misguided jack o lantern and revel in one of the long running franchise’s more hysterical entries.

The early aughts saw Stephen Sommers riding high with the Universal monsters following the success of his Mummy films, so it seemed only natural that he would try his hand with a straight-up monster mash that featured Dracula, Frankenstein, and the Wolf Man. The result was Van Helsing, a Hugh Jackman star vehicle that made money at the box office but failed to kickstart a franchise thanks to tepid reviews and the violent rejection of fans. Join Sebastian, Jennifer and Rodney as they scream into spooky season with a lively debate over the vampiric value of this ludicrously bombastic blockbuster.

Jan de Bont’s remake of the 1963 Robert Wise classic promised to take The Haunting of Hill House into the new millennium, boasting state of the art special effects and an A-list cast. Unfortunately it also boasted a clunky script, ridiculous production design and CGI overload that robbed Shirley Jackson’s seminal ghost story of all of its terror and dread. Join Sebastian and Jennifer as they summon the spirit of Hugh Crain and question their sanity for watching this misguided misfire more than any sane couple should.

Riding high off of their Lethal Weapon partnership, filmmaker Richard Donner and star Mel Gibson had every reason to believe their high concept action thriller Conspiracy Theory would be a success. And with the help of superstar Julia Roberts, a villainous turn by Patrick Stewart and a script by Oscar winner Brian Helgeland, it was, at least modestly so. Get to the bottom of why Sebastian and The Mighty Peculiar podcast’s Matt Anderson are covering this problematic in hindsight, brain boiling entry in the 90s thriller genre.

Fans of the 20th Century Fox mutant superhero series were anxious to see the backstory of fan-favorite character Wolverine explained, so Gavin Hood’s prequel X-Men Origins: Wolverine landed with a box office bang in 2009. But despite a successful financial run, the film was lambasted by fans and critics for its shoddy special effects, mistreatment of beloved characters (including a disastrous debut for Ryan Reynold’s Deadpool) and some truly baffling story choices. Join Sebastian and Jennifer as they go full adamantium claws out on this misshapen mutant misfire and show gratitude for the recent corrective of Deadpool & Wolverine.

George Miller’s gonzo, post apocalyptic masterpiece Mad Max: Fury Road stunned audiences in 2015, earning widespread praise and cult status. But despite that goodwill, strong reviews and the presence of stars Anya Taylor Joy and Chris Hemsworth, Miller’s prequel Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga stalled terribly at the box office this Memorial Day. Join Sebastian and Jennifer as they discuss the pitfalls of prequels, questionable character choices and their love of the world building in the Mad Max universe.

Based loosely on an 80s TV series, David Leitch’s stunt driven action rom com The Fall Guy was positioned to catapult Ryan Gosling’s post Barbie heat into the superstar stratosphere. But despite a winning turn from Gosling, co-star Emily Blunt and an array of comedic, dazzling stunt sequences, the film’s Hollywood insider trappings failed to translate to box office success. Join Sebastian and Jennifer for a by-request episode as they take a ten-story plunge with this enjoyable, under-seen gem.

Based on an obscure comicbook character, Madame Web hoped to cash in on the goodwill of the tangentially related Marvel Cinematic Universe as well as the success of the animated Spiderverse films. But the Sony produced movie was ensnared in toxic buzz from the outset, the goofy trailers and mocking reviews ensuring that it would be yet another bomb for a female-led superteam. Join Sebastian and Jennifer as they flex their powers of premonition and suffer through this laughably awful spider-flop.