That Husband Podcast

By That Husband PodcastSociety & Culture Relationships

That Husband Podcast episodes

July 09, 2025 ⁠I Hid My Pain So I Wouldn't Look Weak: The Price Men Pay To Pretend We're Okay | Alvin Fredericks
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[S2] EPISODE 25: FROM PAIN TO PROMISE

In this episode, we sit with Alvin Fredericks of @thetruedadventurer a husband, father, and faithful follower of Christ, who walks us through a raw, heartbreaking, and ultimately redemptive journey through 5 miscarriages depression, spiritual wrestling, and healing. This isn’t just a story about grief, it’s a story about carrying unbearable weight silently, about standing at the edge of faith and finding God even when you feel abandoned. It’s a rare glimpse into what miscarriage and loss feel like for a husband, one who is expected to be strong, while silently fracturing on the inside.

What do you do when you’ve done all the “right” things, but life still knocks the breath out of you? What does it mean to reflect Christ to your wife when you yourself are crumbling? Alvin opens up about being forgotten in the grief, misunderstood by the church, and pushed to the brink of ending it all. But he also shares the power of faithful friends, fatherly love, and how God used an unexpected encounter to plant the seed of hope again. This episode is not about easy answers, it’s about honest questions, deep pain, and a real Saviour.

If you're a husband walking through loss, or standing beside someone who is, this episode will move you. It’s for the men who feel unseen in their suffering. It's for the ones who keep showing up despite the weight. And it’s for anyone who needs a reminder that even in deep suffering, God is not absent, He is forming something eternal. This is not just an episode; it's a lifeline.

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#thathusbandpodcast #christianmarriage #faithinsuffering #husbandswholead #MarriageAfterLoss #miscarriageawareness #MenAndGrief #christianhusbands #fatherhoodjourney #infantlosssupport #biblicalmanhood #HopeInHeartbreak #GodInTheStorm #marriageministry #faithoverfeelings #healingtogether #christiantestimony #MenWithFeelings #HusbandPerspective #JesusInThePain #RealMarriageTalk #failingforward #christianpodcast #griefandgrace #christcenteredmarriage

1 hr 29 min
July 02, 2025 Young, Broke, And Married: Why I Started A Family At 22 | Shaun Mahlangu
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[S2] EPISODE 24: YOUNG, MARRIED & FIGURING IT OUT

What happens when your faith, finances, and fatherhood all collide? In this honest and soul-stirring episode, we sit down with Shaun Mahlangu, a husband, father of three, and creative content creator, who opens up about the raw reality of becoming a husband at 22 and navigating life, love, and fatherhood with nothing but a dream, a prayer, and a patient wife. From counting coins, trying to buy a "kota" to losing jobs, feeling like a failure, and watching the light fade from his wife's eyes, Shaun doesn’t hold back. This isn’t just a story; it’s a mirror for every man who's ever wondered, “Am I enough?”

Shaun shares how being a broke husband nearly broke him, and what it took to climb out of depression, insecurity, and envy. We discuss retrenchment and redefining masculinity through the lens of failure and faith. You’ll hear what it’s like to cry in the car before work, battle anxiety silently, and still choose to show up every day for your wife, your kids, and your calling. More than that, you’ll hear how God shows up with grace for every child born, every prayer whispered, and every husband willing to keep failing forward.

If you’ve ever felt crushed under the weight of expectations or afraid to dream with empty pockets, this episode is for you. It’s a love letter to resilient wives, a tribute to cycle-breaking fathers, and a reminder to all men: your brokenness doesn’t disqualify you, it may just be the very place where God rebuilds you. Don’t miss this deeply reflective, personal, and hope-filled conversation.

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2 hr 8 min
June 25, 2025 Failed Engagement, Giving Up My Apartment: The Pressure To Marry Almost Broke Me | Justin Henry
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[S2] EPISODE 23: MARRIAGE IDOLATRY

What happens when a man decides to rewrite his story of marriage? In this raw and heartfelt episode, Justin Henry sits across the table to unpack the emotional weight of growing up in a father-absent home, idolising marriage, and healing through it. He shares how he once tried to outrun the pain with career ambition and dating cycles, but ultimately discovered that God's grace and the hard work of real love are what make a husband. This is not just another love story, it's a story of redemption, restoration, and choosing to be present.

Together, we talk about the pressures men face, from churches that rush young people into marriage, to mothers who ask, “So when are you getting married?”, to societal metrics that equate manhood with money. Justin reflects on what it's like to try, fail, and try again with wisdom. If you’ve ever made marriage an idol, rushed into love, or felt unprepared for the weight of being a husband, this one’s for you. We don't hold back in this one!

Whether you’re married, divorced, dating, or single by design, this conversation will challenge you. Because at the core, this isn’t just about marriage, it’s about what kind of human you’re becoming. Hit play, and don’t forget to like, comment, and subscribe.

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1 hr 35 min
June 18, 2025 Cheated On, Broken & Finding Real Love – How Friendship Opened Up My Heart Again | Tebogo Mphohle
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[S2] EPISODE 22: FRIEND-ZONE IN MARRIAGE

"Marriage isn’t hard—what’s hard is pretending to love someone you don’t even like." In this episode, we unpack what it truly means for a husband to be friends with his wife. Our guest, Tebogo Mphohle opens up about how friendship in marriage isn't just a bonus, it’s a lifeline. He reflects on the moments where being friends with his wife quite literally saved their relationship. Without that foundation of mutual admiration, laughter, and understanding, many couples, especially men, drift emotionally while still sharing a home. The cost is intimacy being lost, and eventually, so is the marriage.

What makes this episode special is how unashamedly it weaves faith, family legacy, and vulnerability. Tebogo speaks about growing up in a home where love was modeled not just privately but publicly, and how that shaped his vision of marriage. Yet even with a beautiful template, he found himself in a toxic relationship before meeting his wife. The contrast was jarring but redemptive. It was only when he was truly seen, truly safe, and truly befriended that his heart began to heal. What followed wasn’t just romance, it was renewal.

If you’re a husband wondering why things feel dry, distant, or just… dull, maybe what’s missing isn’t a new date night strategy or more counselling sessions. Maybe what’s missing is friendship. Real, intentional, "you're my day-one" type of friendship. And as you’ll hear in this episode: you don’t have to fake it till you make it, you can choose to like her, again and again. Tune in, be challenged, and rediscover the power of being her friend.

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1 hr 51 min
June 11, 2025 I Asked Her To Trust Me, But I Didn’t Realise How Costly It Would Be | Sihle Xulu
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[S2] EPISODE 21: OUR CONVICTION & FAMILY VISION
In this soul-stirring episode of That Husband Podcast, Blaque Nubon sits down with Pastor and friend Sihle Xulu for a conversation that feels less like an interview and more like a mirror—reflecting the quiet weight many husbands carry but rarely speak of. From moving provinces with nothing but conviction, to rebuilding a marriage that once felt beyond repair, Sihle opens up about the unseen cost of calling, and the holy tension of wanting to lead well without losing the people who matter most.
This isn’t just about ministry or marriage, it's about the sacred in-between. The moments when your wife says, “I don’t like you right now,” but you still have to show up. The quiet wrestle of asking your family to follow you again—another city, another job, another dream, and wondering if this time, it's really God or just ambition. It’s about learning to hold your calling and your family with both hands and choosing to stay when it would be easier to escape.
For every man who’s ever felt torn between purpose and presence, this conversation is an anchor. It’s a tender reminder that you don’t have to perform your way through pain. That true strength is often hidden in confession, and healing begins the moment we say, “This is hard… but we’re still here.” Press play, this one might change how you see your story.
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1 hr 52 min
June 04, 2025 Asking My Wife To Live With My Mom Wasn't About Control: The Truth Of "Ukukotiza" | Ayanda Buthelezi
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[S2] EPISODE 20: BREAKING THE IN-LAW STIGMA
What happens when culture, marriage, and modern masculinity collide? In this deeply personal episode, we sit down with Ayanda Buthelezi to unpack the often misunderstood practice of "Ukukotiza." In this traditional Nguni custom, a new bride spends time with her in-laws to learn the rhythms, responsibilities, and expectations of married life. But this is not just about tradition—it's about identity, manhood, and the sacred in-between space where a wife is not just joining a family but shaping one.
As husbands, we often stand silently at the edge of this process. But what if our silence is costing us something? Ayanda opens up about how Ukukotiza has evolved—how some families still treat it as a rite of passage with dignity, while others risk turning it into exploitation. We reflect honestly on what it means for a man to guide, protect, and honour this season, not as a controller, but as a covering. It’s about more than chores—it’s about culture, character, and covenant.
Whether you grew up watching "Ukukotiza" from the side lines or are navigating it with your new wife today, this episode invites you to rethink your role as a husband in a culturally rich but emotionally complex tradition. This isn’t just a conversation about our wives—it’s about us, too. About how we honour her, honour our elders, and honour God in how we merge culture and covenant.
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1 hr 17 min
May 28, 2025 She Was Fed Up With Church Boys, Then God Interrupted Her With Me | Kevin Makhubo
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[S2] EPISODE 19: DIVINE PLOT TWIST
Sitting across from Blaque Nubon is Kevin Makhubo—a husband, father, and man of God, who opens up about his journey from rejecting the idea of marriage to becoming a husband defined by love and sacrifice. His reflections are not polished soundbites but raw truths, soaked in years of wrestling with God, unlearning broken definitions of masculinity, and submitting to a higher calling. Kevin’s story is not just inspiring; it is deeply confronting for any man who has wondered if he has what it takes to be a present, intentional, and loving husband.
What makes this conversation especially rich is Kevin’s transparency about his relationship with his absent father. At 23, he chose to forgive a man who had wounded him not with violence, but with silence and absence. That act of forgiveness, rooted in obedience to God, unlocked a freedom that shaped the kind of husband and father Kevin would become. It's a testimony that manhood is not inherited, it’s forged. Kevin chose to become the man he never had, breaking generational pain with courageous vulnerability and relentless faith. His reconciliation with his father wasn’t about receiving closure, it was about releasing the burden so he could walk into marriage whole.
The episode also dives into the sacred messiness of marriage, how passion, playfulness, purpose, and pain coexist in a lifelong covenant. Kevin’s reflections on sex, spontaneity, spiritual alignment, and shared purpose with his wife are refreshingly honest and disarmingly insightful. This isn’t a highlight reel of a perfect marriage, it’s a living, breathing example of two people choosing each other every day, even when it costs them. His encouragement about the power of brotherhood, the importance of accountability, and the freedom that comes from open conversations, especially about sex and finances, makes this episode a gift for any man who wants to grow, not just as a husband, but as a whole person.
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1 hr 54 min
May 21, 2025 Saying Vows Was Easy - Walking In Love, Honesty & Regret For 43 Years Is Something Else | The Gules
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[S2] EPISODE 18: IT’S NOT MAGIC, IT’S MAINTENANCE
In this deeply personal episode, we sit down with Drs. Jerry and Gugu Gule, a couple whose love story spans more than 43 years of marriage. From a chance encounter in a university book queue to decades of shared life, the Gules offer a rare glimpse into a covenant marked by friendship, faith, and fierce commitment. Their story is not just about longevity—it’s about intentional love, expressed through the small, ordinary moments that become extraordinary in hindsight. They show us that behind every lasting marriage are difficult conversations, the willingness to say “I’m sorry,” and the sacred act of wiping away each other’s tears—even when you’ve been the cause of them.
What makes this episode especially profound is the vulnerability and humility with which the Gules reflect on their journey. Dr. Jerry shares the painful memory of missing a key moment in their second child’s birth due to work, a regret that still weighs heavily on him. Dr. Gugu opens up about the ways in which her early life shaped a guarded, assertive posture and how Christ slowly transformed her heart toward gentleness and forgiveness. They describe how prayer, humour, and a shared commitment to reconciliation helped them navigate heartbreak, misunderstandings, and evolving needs across different seasons of marriage. Together, they model a kind of love that is deeply sacrificial, wholly authentic, and refreshingly unpretentious.
This episode is more than just a conversation—it’s a testament. A reminder that marriage, at its best, is not built on grand romantic gestures, but on the slow, steady accumulation of mutual service, grace, and laughter. For every husband and wife wondering if it’s still possible to love and be loved for a lifetime, the Gules offer hope and a blueprint. And in a world that often tells us to walk away when things get hard, this story gently insists: stay, listen, forgive, and grow together.
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1 hr 38 min
May 14, 2025 Stop Chasing, Just Commit – What I Keep Learning From Loving a Good Woman | Bonko Khoza
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[S2] EPISODE 17: SHE GAVE ME FREEDOM TO FIND MY VOICE
In this episode, we sit down with the incredibly thoughtful and grounded Bonko Khoza — not just as an actor, but as a husband, father, and man who continues to wrestle honestly with what it means to show up for the people he loves. This is a conversation between husbands for husbands, where we strip back the performances and talk real about legacy, failure, oneness, sacrifice, and the quiet strength it takes to stay committed — not just to our wives, but to the kind of men we aspire to be.
We talk about the gift and weight of fatherhood, the long road of partnership, and how black men are redefining marriage not as an institution of performance, but of purpose. Bonko shares deeply about how his wife has been both his safety and mirror, and how navigating change within marriage requires humility, introspection, and a kind of teamwork that often goes unseen. This episode isn’t about perfection — it’s about persistence, vulnerability, and learning to love from a place of truth, not tradition.
If you're a husband, or hope to be one, this episode is a love letter to the sacred and messy middle of marriage. It's for those who grew up without examples and those who carry the legacy of good men. It's for the ones trying to break cycles, build homes, and do the work of becoming. As always, this space is for us — to know better so we can do better. Welcome back to That Husband Podcast.
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2 hr 20 min
May 07, 2025 A Shack, A Secret & A Dream: She Stayed Even With A Leaking Roof - Jacob Msipha
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[S2] EPISODE 16: HOW FAR ARE YOU WILLING TO GO?
In this episode, we sit down with Pastor Jacob Msipha, a man whose 20-year journey through marriage and ministry defies the odds and dismantles the myths. From building a church in a leaking shack to nurturing a vibrant home, Pastor Jacob opens up about the grace, grit, and vision that have carried him through seasons of triumph and turbulence. His story is not one of perfection, but of relentless faith and deeply intentional love. If you've ever questioned whether favour follows marriage, this conversation will challenge and uplift you.
We unpack what it means to be a husband—not just in title, but in spirit, vision, and responsibility. With humility and wisdom, Pastor Jacob reflects on the importance of vision-casting in marriage, the power of vulnerability, and how trust in God becomes the anchor when clarity fades. He doesn't shy away from the hard moments—those when depression, doubt, or silence from heaven fill the room—but he reminds us that the strength of a marriage often lies not in answers, but in who we become while waiting for them.
More than a podcast episode, this is a masterclass in building: building marriages, building families, and building legacy. Whether you're newly married, a decade in, or still wrestling with what partnership looks like, Pastor Jacob’s reflections will meet you where you are. Tune in, take notes, and be reminded—this isn't about becoming superheroes; it's about showing up, every day, and choosing to build anyway.
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2 hr 7 min