The Beer Engine

Seasons greetings, my friends! What a lovely December day here in the Midwest - it’s 4:30 PM, it’s dark, I’m sitting under the fluorescent glow of my ring light while drinking some saison. On today’s episode, the guys break down the hyperest, nerdiest, dorkiest news of the day by breaking down the “Easter Egg” single barrel variants of Bourbon County. Easter eggs? Goose Island, you idiots! That’s the wrong holiday! Then the guys break down some of the dumbest beer Facebook content of the last few weeks in a new, yet to be titled segment in which they will uh….break down some of the dumbest beer Facebook content of the last few weeks. Finally, to make up for that awful “Easter Egg” anachronism, they play a Santa-themed edition of “Untrappd” which should fulfill our butt and balls quota for the week. Back to drinking in the dark! See ya!

Tony said this was the show title, which really saves me some trouble. See, I forget pretty much everything that happened during the show instantly. I might as well have Will Smith right in front of me with one of those memory-zapping gadgets. What do I remember from this show? Well, I know Tony won a very special award (congrats) and we played an excellent game of "This or That" which will make you want to flip on ABC Family. One thing I'm sure of is that I definitely didn't make any veiled threats as a result of any distressing beer news. There's no way that happened. Also, I guess I said I was horny for beer. Let me know if I said that, I might have to make a retraction. OK, see ya!

Heyyy. How's it going? Did everyone have a nice Thanksgiving? Did you get ripped up drunk and play Quiplash until 2AM? Hope so! On today's episode, the guys cover important existential questions: what beers does Waffle House like? How much has Griff spent on stout lotteries in the past 3 weeks? And what if you could travel through time? Would you do the obvious and kill, you know, "that guy?" Or would you do what Tony and Griff did and just look at lists of beers from the past? I hope you answered the latter because that's what we did on a fun ride with the "Brux Capacitor." Well, have a great whatever holiday is this week (?) and see ya later!

It's the holidays everyone, and you know what that means: it's time for everyone to stand in a long winding line through the H concourse at O'Hare to board Spirit Airlines flight 356. Onboard you and your 179 mates will be safely spaced 28 inches from each other. Alas, getting breathed on by a transient isn't in the cards for the boys this year so they are virtually bringing their podcast family together, and Podcast Dad Brian Mollica joined the step brothers today. Brian steps over to the kids table and gives Griff some tips for what could be the best Thanksgiving ever - one where he can just eat and drink whatever he wants! Then there's a game in order as Griff pits Brian and Tony against one another in an epic Food Network recipe battle. And hey, of you're feeling lonely on Black Wednesday and need a place to drink beers, come hang out with us on Discord. Just email us or DM us to get the invite link. Fun!

Hello. Hi. Welcome to the Beer Engine Podcast. The election is finally in the rear view mirror and America has returned to…normal? Whatever. On today's show, the guys get back to basics. What's that mean? Lager, bad bit ideas and a stupid, half assed game? Bloody hell. You're right. Sorry I guess. We did play a game that had some very funny beers, and I think you'll love it. And hey, if you like that, you should think about coming to our Thanksgiving Eve "Virtual Pub!" Just email us or slide into our DMs and we'll drop you an invite to the Discord! Come play games and drink beers! Just like a regular show wow!!

Ah another week of show notes. OK, let's see here, close out the incognito windows, pull up Google Docs, and we're good! This week on the Beer Engine: Rupert Murdoch, Donald Trump and musical guest, The Coconut Stouts! The guys do talk about the very predictable election results and start building Donald Trump's official enemies list. Also, Griff orders beer and succeeds and fails at the same time!? Huh?? Then, Griff cleans up the hamberder wrappers and spicy nugget crumbs off the seat in the Delorean to take Tony on a ride in the "Brux Capacitor" back to the last time we had an election roiling in the courts. Wow and did that go well? No answer? OK then!

Oh no, Tuesday already?! Will the torture never end? Probably not. A fine Segway (the little scooter that's been discontinued, ha ha) to today's delightful Election Day special! Now, what could Tony and I add to your election day experience you ask? Well, I may not have any fancy maps that can zoom in on a county (try Google FYI) but I do have some IPA and we do both look kind of like handsome TV folks. (??) Anyway, in between various tirades from Griff, the guys break down the beer lists at the candidates' HQ. Also, legal matters threaten to end the show, or at least transition the IP to better hosts. And "This or That" returns with some funny named people that Tony just "happens to know" from "only a few minutes" of watching Fox News. Pasquale Cipollone - call us!!!

Bleh, bleh, I vant to suck…your blood! Dr. Griffinstein here (or whatever I called myself, I can’t remember) with some very professorial show notes for “dat ass.” On a very special Halloween episode of the show, the boys dig into the existential questions of Halloween. Why would a whole state like Runts? Who is your favorite drinking buddy monster? Would Meatloaf like a red ale with chili peppers? And so on. Also, “Two Brews and a Lie” makes its triumphant return with real written garbage from my brain - and I still fooled Tony with it, haha! And if you’d like to play along yourself, you can just sort of try to think while Tony is talking (hard), or you could pause it and then try to outlogic him and see how you do. And if you do that, you will be required to send me the results with subject line “my test results :(“ to beerengineshow at gmail dot com. If you go three for three I will forward your information to MENSA. Good luck!

Greetings! Wow what a week hmm? I had a nice time anyway - had a few lagers, a couple seltzies. It's going great here really. Oh and also, there's another episode of the podcast you love! On today's episode, Tony loads up his beer with Fireball while Griff analyzes his bank account for stout. Then, Tony gets pushed into two impossible guessing games, attempting to guess the prices of Chicago stout before driving down I-55 to try a St. Louis edition of "This, That or the Other Thing!" I know there were other things we did but I think I just totally black out during our recording so I am positive that this is all there. Oh and thank you to Earthbound Beer for making unusual beers and this week's game easy to write. Griff appreciates you!

Hello. Podcast activate. Listening nodes engaged and deployed. Comedy gauge set to 3...3.5 max. And, we're a go! Griff returns this week with some beer and safety ratings from Michigan, where kidnapping is cool? Also, coincidentally (*wink*) has some news of a kidnapping attempt on a well-known guest host. The guys also go in deep with some serious crypto-talk because we have a new bitcoin owner in our midst. And you know there would be a segment, as "Behind the Ticks" makes a return, Pumpkin-style! So, I've been watching Come Dine with Me: South Africa and we've got a dead ringer for Tony as a contestant. You know, the boat full of prisoners takes one wrong turn and that's Tony making packet gravy and squashing 5-inch long bugs, just like he does now but only in South Africa! Alright, well, see ya!