The Conditional Release Program

There's been another major twist in the presidential contest with Joe Biden being persuaded to step aside, allowing his VP, Kamala Harris to step in. She isn't quite confirmed as the nominee yet but it seems Barack Obama is more or less alone among senior Democrats in calling for an open convention in Chicago on 19 August.

The Two Jacks discuss the role of Nancy Pelosi as Joe's executioner. As all good politicians must, she led the tributes to the 46th POTUS with metaphorical blood on her hands and proved herself to be a leader of consequence.

Can Harris beat Trump? It's more than possible but she is starting from six lengths behind.

In other news, the Brits show us the pathway to political civility as Sir Keir Starmer announces a major change to housing policy in the UK.

Germany cuts its military aid to Ukraine by half.

While in sport, the return of warm up games would assist battling cricket nations as a quick fix for the terrible mess Test cricket finds itself in. 

The Two Jacks discuss the attempted assassination of Donald Trump and what it means to the presidential race. HK Jack says the Dems can still win but it just got a whole lot harder. We turn to the potential Democrat candidates should Biden stand down. HK Jack believes Kamala Harris has one shot and might be the contender.

The allegations of corruption within the CFMEU are considered while the Two Jacks explore the relationship between the union's construction division and the Labor Party.

In sport, is Djokovic being disrespected by tennis audiences? In cricket, England sends Jimmy Anderson off in style.  

Some little fella had a crack at Trump. He missed, thankfully. America would be ablaze right now if that little twerp could shoot.

In the wake of this paradigm changing event we look at the absolute slop that has been served up on social media, especially Elon's Twitter.

We don't know the motive. We don't know the truth. But we know a whole bunch of total nonsense that idiots made up on the internet.

What fun.

Long episode with loose script and dodgy AI editing. You've been warned! Any horrible mistakes please let me know - robots edited it so it's not my fault!

ALSO forgot to do a beer plug but go to cbco.beer and enter CRP10 to get 10% off the best damn IPA in the country. Or their other beers which are also pretty good. I'll make it up to them next time!

The Two Jacks discuss the Payman defection and agree that as it stands it holds no great risk for Labor.

Meanwhile in the US, the Dems circle the wagons around Grampa Joe.

Japan is finally kicking its floppy disk addiction.

The Tories are sent packing and there was no one more deserving than Liz Truss and Jacob Rees-Mogg.

The French prove themselves damned unpredictable again while in sport, Jessica Hull produces one of Australia’s greatest ever track performances in Paris in the 1500m with the Olympics less than three weeks away. 

It's time for a news roundup which kicks off with a bit of a correction from our Digital ID episode which saw the cookers get one right. Kinda. Well sort of. A bit. But they did. Big thanks to Michael for letting us know!

Then we jump straight into politics - Biden struggled in the debate and the UK was set to go to the polls. The results are in and Labor pissed it in, but we knew that so it's doesn't really matter.

In cooker update we laugh at MGG, Guru and Dave Oneegs who are all making dicks of themselves as usual.

In sovcits we have a particularly nasty character who relied on the Vienna Convention for reasons we don't know and....

Pete's an influencer! Well, according to the daily mail.

Enjoy!

The Two Jacks discuss the disastrous performance of Joe Biden in the first Presidential debate. Can he survive it? The Two Jacks say no and a replacement must be found. Who will it be? Not Kamala, HK Jack says, more likely Gavin Newsom, the California governor.

In local politics, the Senator Payman distraction is causing a huge headache for the Albanese government who desperately wanted to bed down the tax cuts and budget goodies to the punters.

In the UK, the Sunak government prepares for electoral gotterdammerung while France starts its shift to the right.

Advertising algorithms -- are they controlling our lives or is JTI really a mad foot fetishist?

In sport, the Euros offer another tease for the Brits, the Indians are stranded in Barbados (not a bad place to be stranded) and JTI's beloved Blues make the case as premiership contenders. 

Here's a preview of this weeks premium epiosde.

From as little as five bucks a month! Don't make me get all weird and shame you like Dave Oneegs does - if you can't afford it, you just need to like want it more. Winners grindset bro. Sell more water filters ya lazy slob.

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It's not even bloody Premium Episode 69 it's actually 80. Alas. You'll see why that matters in the first few mins of ramblings!

Assange is home! Will he be a pest? Probably. Is he a shithead? Generally.

We have a look at Jules to see if he's worth applauding - but agree that he's done his time and deserves a bit of vitamin D.

Tucker Carlson comes to Australia and it's shit. They slash the ticket prices to get the punters in and move the stage forward so you can't see the empty space. It's a resounding failure and very much in line with Clive Palmer's hit rate on success.

And, of course, Tommy Robinson is arrested for being an illegal immigrant. Very very funny. Sucked in.

Enjoy!

Julian Assange is a free man after 12 years of living in confined spaces. It's a victory for quiet diplomacy and Albo, Rudd and the Labor government deserve credit for it. Regardless of what people might think of Assange, he had spent too long in prison.

Meanwhile Lisa goes back to the Federal Court for her hat.

In New Zealand a woman takes her partner to a dispute tribunal for not taking her to the airport.

In the UK, the Tories have stopped shooting themselves in the foot. It's a fully blown machine gun job now with toes and heels flying all over the place.

In sport, Australia fails in the ICC T-20 World Cup while JTI announces Carlton as his number one seed to win the AFL flag. 

In the wake of two Seinfeld shows disturbed by protestors, the Two Jacks take a look at the role of comedy in our society.

The first point to make is a comedian with more than 50 years experience like Seinfeld, standing with a mic in his hand among a mainly adoring audience is going to sit any hecklers on their arses in quick time.

The discussion enters into the best stand up comedians of all time. JTI claims Richard Pryor changed everything and is the guv'nor while arguing that Billy Connolly was the funniest man at a live venue. We then look at political language and what a politician means when they utter predictable messages.

In more serious matters, Immigration Minister Andrew Giles' woes and bad judgment continue.

The Reform Party moves past the Tories as the new opposition in the UK on polling at least.

In sport, Dustin Martin stands atop as a champion of the big moment in AFL, Australia moves into the final eight in the T-20 World Cup while the Euros get underway. 

Count 'em folks. Seven. That's what Dutton is planning.

How much will they cost? Dunno.

When will they be ready? Ten years or so mate, give or take a few.

What do we do in the meantime Dutts? Gas. That's cheap and reliable. Not.

What a dumb policy. We look at it. We are harsh but fair.

Enjoy!