Happy freakin' weekend! Grab your coffee pot, throw a straw in it, and let us tell you some stories. Laura brings you a surprising Canadian crime while Kim talks about goddesses and the origins of Easter.

SURPRISE! We're tipsy. We're taking quizzes. We're breaking chairs. There's also pretend buttons, ghost children, George Washington memes, astrology, Disney, and a wealth of tomfoolery. 

Welcome! We are switching it up and drinking wine this time! (It was a dark red blend. That counts.) We are coming at you with a murder mystery from Ireland and the haunting of a hospital that is still up and running.

Please note the sarcasm in the title of this episode. We don't legitimately thank the patriarchy for anything here. 

If you thought last week's title was misleading, this week we're making it all pretty damn clear from the get go. We have to keep you all on your toes somehow. 

Join us as we discuss one of Finland's most famous murders, creatures of the sea, and many other things that you need coffee to discuss. Ending everyone who destroys your sleep and waters of the heart, for example. There's a lot of sea...men... in this episode.  

We're back with a normal length episode! Does the title make it sound like we're taking a break from our usual dark topics? Don't worry - we're just luring you in to a false sense of security. 

We have some real humdingers for you today. Laura tells us the horrifying story of the Kobe Child Murders while Kim (thanks to the Liderc, mind you) tells everyone about some sexually deviant entities. And then, just to keep you on your toes...impromptu singing! So, pour a big cup of coffee and join us. 

In this week's episode, we discuss a crime against a non-human (which is the worst) and a supernatural chicken. Miracle or demon? You decide.

Do magical things with your pits, guys!

"Youths!!" The intro of this episode is dedicated to creepy children. In other news, we are content at work, Kim is *not* dead (yet), Amazon has its own coffee brand, and Laura's husband is afraid of us. Typical week at the Dark Roast! 

Join us as we discuss a wannabe freedom fighter who is more of a freedom flee-er and many of the f'ed up things that go down in Florida. 

Definitely do yourself a favor and check out our friends at It's Real, I Swear! We advise having a snack handy because you'll get hungry. 

We broke this into two episodes because this is a longer story... :) 

Toni tells us about her experience that brought her to A Haunting... and it's a doozy. Kim also rants about censorship the Bible, and we get irritated that everyone thinks Jesus is white. Sorry, not sorry.

So, sit back, grab your coffee because you probably won't be sleeping anyway, right? 

You can find Ms. Toni Talley on FB and Instagram. 

Come one, come all! Join us as we speak with Ms. Toni Talley about her first experience with a haunted home and how gangster she was as a cab driver. This week's episode is a two parter, as we all had so much fun talking. 

Also, do yourself a favor and wait for the end. K THX.

We decided to try out doing some fun episodes here and there for those unfortunate times that we can't record. This way you guys still have *something* to listen to. 

Join us as we answer questions like, "Are your parents disappointed in your career aspirations?" and discuss the Mandela Effect.