A major stumbling block for those wanting to develop better self-discipline and improve their lives as letting their ego get in the way. The ego is a mask; it’s not the real you. Regularly remind yourself of the process, not the outcome and be okay with being a beginner or being wrong. Stop playing a role and encounter the moment as it is—no comparisons, appraisals, or judgments.

On your self-discipline journey, you’ll encounter pain, which is inevitable. But suffering (i.e., the way we react to pain) is avoidable. Blame, personal narratives, regret, self-hate, doubt, anxiety etc. are all optional reactions. Try not to add “second darts” when life deals you a bad hand. With awareness and calm, compassionate acceptance, we can allow both pain and suffering to pass.

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Peter Hollins is a bestselling author, human psychology researcher, and a dedicated student of the human condition.

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