The Empowering Working Moms Podcast-Real Talk with Dr. Prianca Naik

Episode 3: How to Get Rid of Mental Exhaustion

So many things in our daily lives today can lead to feelings of overwhelm and exhaustion.

Here, Dr. Prianca discusses the most common factors contributing to these feelings and their antidotes.

What you will learn:

• Common energy suckers
• How to care for yourself
• The importance of self-love

To end burnout and exhaustion and get your peace of mind back, check out her free masterclass on 4 steps to overcome burnout, get rid of overwhelm, and get your peace of mind back.

https://program.stresscleansemd.com/4-secrets-to-living-a-life-you-ll-love-podcast

If you want to work with Coach Prianca Naik, MD, go to

www.priancanaikmdcoaching.as.me to book a 30-minute consultation call

Follow her on social media:

https://www.facebook.com/prianca.naik

https://www.instagram.com/doctorprianca

https://www.linkedin.com/in/prianca-naik-md-0524a196/

Join my FREE Facebook group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/646992382603860

[FULL TRANSCRIPT BELOW:]

Hello!

Thank you for joining me. I'm so glad you're here!

Today I want to talk about not wasting our precious energy.

Do you ever feel like you're totally drained and depleted?

You're exhausted and have a hard time prioritizing yourself.

Like you're losing yourself?

Well, work is hard. being a mother is hard.

Take both of those Combine them together, and it is pretty damn trying!

Because being a mother is common/so many women are moms, maybe it seems like an ordinary job.

But it is far from that as we know and we don't get enough credit or gratitude!

Because so many women are mothers, maybe it seems like it should be easy or we should be nonchalant about it, but in fact it's a lot of pressure.

In this day and age with the internet and freely flowing information, standards are a lot higher than when our parents were rearing us.

Raising and nurturing children is one of the most important jobs in this world and yet we do it along with an income producing job.

Some mornings I find myself asking myself why do I feel so exhausted? And then I realize well, it's life:life can be exhausting.

So Why do we feel exhausted? Here are some reasons:

1) We want to be everything to everyone.

2) We put the needs of others in front of our own.

3) Perhaps we have a draining job and it bleeds into home life.

4) We may have a difficult spouse, boss, or parent.

5) We fail to care for ourselves.

6) We are going through a major life transition (moving, job change, divorce, pregnancy, or new child).

Yes, life can be tough. But we are fucking fierce. We can do hard things!

Think of all that you've achieved up until now.

Take a minute to write it down 5 hard things you've done in the past year and celebrate it. This will give you a boost!

Now I want to dive into Solutions to the 5 problems I mentioned

Issue number one-Being everything to everyone

But we just can't. I want you to absorb that one.

We have to pick our priorities (lets say we decide: partner and kids)

And even when we want to help them, we must take care of and love ourselves in order to have energy to do so.

Self-care-there's a buzzword.

I want to address self-care here bc spa days/massages/bubble baths are all good and well

But there's so much more to self-care than that.

The way to truly give to oneself is through mind management and self love.

In terms of managing the mind, shifting how we see the world Is critical. When something bad happens ask yourself, how is the situation serving me how is the situation propelling me in the right direction to where I want to go.

Even though the tough time or bad news may not seem helpful at all.

Issue number 2 we put the needs of others in front of our own…the solution to this is loving ourselves and getting rid of people-pleasing which I'll address in episode 4.

Self-love. There's a concept. It's funny; I have two children under the age of 5 and they love themselves so much. It's remarkable. My baby loves seeing herself in the mirror. My 4 year old is so proud of himself. I believe we are born loving ourselves. Unfornately, life circumstances, high standards, not good enoughness are often shoved down our throats in our childhoods. And self-love seems like such a stretch.

I read a book called Love Yourself Like Your Life depends on It by Kamal Ravikant and it changed my life.

He talks about loving ourselves in whatever way that means.

How about having respect and love for ourselves to not allow people to talk to us in a demeaning way?

I realized that self-love is a key to fulfillment and happiness. I will dive deeper into this in a future episode, but for now I will say as unnatural as it may feel, we must embrace ourselves for who we are and love ourselves unconditionally as we would our own children.

I challenge you to hold your hand on your chest and tell yourself "I love myself" practice this every day and see how you feel.

You must practice, because unfortunately self-love as an adult no longer comes naturally. We can take a cue from our young children.

The more we practice, the more natural it will become.

In terms of people-pleasing: People-pleasing and taking care of others are concepts that are deeply drilled into many of us.

I was specifically taught in middle school by both my grandma and mother to not be selfish and I realized as I got older I ended up harming myself at times trying to do this. I would cause a lot of stress for myself bending over backwards for others. So we really have to re-evaluate helping others at our own expense which often leaves us depleted

I will talk about this more in a future episode.

Issue 3 We have a draining job and it bleeds into home life.

Medicine-we are helping people constantly.

So it is draining. We are giving.

This can often be while sacrificing our own happiness and stability.

And often we aren't treated well or we are disrespected and this can be tiring also.

Boundaries are key in combatting this along with time management.

Boundaries of not taking a patient or family's disrespect.

Many of us may be used to getting dumped on at work. But we really don't have to take it. We aren't victims of our jobs. We can empower ourselves to take control of our life experience.

I had a very rude daughter of a patient snapping at me and I could feel myself getting triggered.

Clearly, they were frustrated with their situation which I understand. Elderly folks who were once independent with health problems it's a tough thing to deal with and go through no doubt.

But it's not an excuse to treat me badly. The situation isn't my fault

So I stopped her and her tracks and told her: I am a human being and I am trying to help you and work with you and I deserve respect.

She kept quiet and her whole tone and body language changed.

Baby steps.

We aren't victims!

We can maintain professionalism and create boundaries simultaneously.

Similarly, doctor moms this one is for you-we can create systems to finish our notes before we go home. So that we can be present with our children instead of typing away at the computer to finish our work.

Issue number 4 we may have a difficult spouse, boss

Difficult people often make us feel unlucky

Why do I have to deal with this? This is so unfair! Stuck with this person.

We can't control them

In fact, we can't control anything outside of ourselves!

But what we can control, what is so empowering is that we can control ourselves!!

We can decide:

Not to absorb peoples stories

Not to try to convince them regarding anything about us

To decide to focus on ourselves and our peace and happiness

Yung Pueblo says: "Maturity is being able to maintain your energy [the way you want it to be] when someone close to you was trying to drag you into their storm. You hear them, you see them, you offer support, BUT at the same time you let their attention be theirs and you let your peace be yours."

And if we find a place to be toxic or a career choice to be toxic we can always change it. I promise. No matter how impossible it seems. We can do the impossible. And don't forget that.

Issue 5 We fail to love and care for ourselves:

We must do this.

How can you love yourself today? How can you honor the concept of self-love.

How can you care for yourself?

If you think you don't have the time, I challenge you to take 5 minutes in the morning to take time for yourself. Could be as simple as savoring your morning cup of coffee or taking a quick walk or stretching

Issue 6 we are going through a major life transition (moving, job change, divorce, new child)

These circumstances are tough ones

But we must remember:

this too shall pass;

And realizing that we got this. Always. Just like we always have. Just like we always will

Sometimes we need to take it one hour at a time when things get rough; and know that the tough time is temporary.

We must hone in on filling our cup

Some methods with which to do this include the following:

Sleep hygiene, connection with others, alone time, or something that rejuvenates you to help you as you navigate your way through a big change.

Next, I'm going to dive in to when you're feeling overwhelmed, what can you do to make sure that the overwhelm doesn't overtake you?

There are two major ways to lighten our mental exhaustion

One is to unload it to someone else

Two is to put energy into ourselves or self-energize.

I will discuss 10 practical tips you can implement that employ these two principles.

This pandemic has been a cluster for many of us. Adds to our decision fatigue and mental load.

A lot of us have children who are not old enough to get vaccinated right? So it makes it tough figuring out where we want to take them within our comfort levels and risk benefit levels to make decisions on what to do with them.

Or even what to do with ourselves and how that will affect them.

So one way to unload our mental load is to take advantage of the fact that we get Decide how we are going to spend our brain space and energy

An example of this:

In the beginning of January a much-needed girls trip was planned Thursday through Sunday in Florida now mind you we were supposed to go to Turks and Caicos but we canceled it because if you have a negative Covid test you cannot come back into the country for 10 days and I cannot be away from my children for that long/have my parents take care of them at that point.

Instead, we decided to go to the Florida Keys. I was very much looking forward to this rest, relaxation, and gossip session with my closest medical school girlfriends. And of course as always my son was sick and had been sick and I was afraid that if he had Covid he would have given it to my parents who were watching him, but I needed this trip.

So I decided to assume the best and not expend mental time and energy worrying.

On one hand, if I had catastrophized that my kid had covid even though we all had it already, I could assume I would have to cancel the trip. Or if he has it and tests negative my dad who is helping to watch him will get covid and die.

However, my dad is boosted and already had covid.

Which left me with:

Would I have to cancel my trip?

My game plan boiled down to watching and waiting, which we all do all the time.

Even though a lot of times when unknowns present themselves, we behave as though it's a shock.

And we feel thrown off kilter. But practicing dealing with these situations can throw us off less and less over time.

And the conclusion of that story was-my kids were fine, my dad was fine. I went on the trip and had an awesome time.

The unknown is pretty much all of life so we need to cultivate a system to deal with it so it doesn't bother us…

How we can handle the unknown so it doesn't drive us nuts:

We have the power, so

We can:

-decide how much time we are going to spend stressing over a given issue

-decide what we want to happen or hope will happen

-decide to focus on the possitve possibility instead of negfative bc we cant control the outcome but we can control our lens on a given situation

In my situation:

I decided that my kid was going to feel ok

The illness wasn't covid since we all already had it

Assumed the best so it wouldnt ruin my moments leading up to my departure date

Often we prepare for the worst in advance, but this doesn't add anything and simply detracts by spending our precious time and energy.

So by focusing on a positive possibility:

We lose absolutely nothing and in fact, gain Time, energy (which we would have lost in catastrophizing), a positive attitude

Now I'm going to address how to self-energize

In order to not be mentally drained

How can we do this?

1. Write down a list of our priorities in work, with ourselves, at home in the bigger picture.
2. Keep that list in a visible place. It Doesn't matter who sees it and judges. That used to embarrass me. What if someone sees my motivational posts? It doesn't matter!!
3. Take time (it can be even 5-10 minutes) for yourself everyday. On the busiest of days this can be savoring your morning coffee. I like to do that. Or 10 minutes of meditation
4. Create more free space in your days
5. This one is a tough one w busy jobs, meal planning, kids' activities, relationship nurturing, parties and gatherings now that COVID seems to be calming down. BUT we can actually decide to create free space in our days
6. I find when I'm feeling rushed and have no breathing space I feel exasperated and bogged down. I have a loose rule to not do more than one activity with friends a week. And to have one thing I can look forward to weekly which may or may not include that
7. Overscheduling is something I had struggled with pre pandemic then it was done for me and I could breathe. I find activities creeping back in and I now have to go back to being conscious about it. The more breathing room I have, the lighter I feel.
8. Journaling or getting out the stress. Journal for 5 min a day to get your woes out and leave them on the paper
9. Call a friend if you can to get it out. This can be so heklpful
10. Ask for help from friends, family, a professional
11. Outsource tasks that don't bring you joy, put some work in (find a trainer, or therapist or coach) invest in yourself and the pay off can be priceless
12. Exercise-A 5-10 minute walk or jog can boost endorphins and energize you
13. Get a good night's sleep. Here are some sleep hygiene tips:
    1. create a bedtime set an alarm for that time
    2. no devices 15 min before bed
    3. get ready for bed well in advance
    4. give yourself time to decompress
    5. journal beforehand if you're the kidn of person who stays up worrying
    6. avoid late caffeine

14. Schedule fun. This is a big one. People forget to have fun in the grind of daily life.

15. Soak in the small moments. Kids jokes, smiles, laughs, candor. There are so many and they're transient.

Remember, in episode 1, I talked about living a life with intention. If you haven't listened to it definitely take the time to do so!

We have to live consciously, put some effort into this life and if we do so, contentment, happiness, a sense of fulfillment is right there for us. For the taking!

We can create energy for ourselves and combat our sense of physical and mental exhaustion.

We have to power to create our dream life.

One baby step at a time.

Go out there and try the above methods, folks!

Let me know if it works for you

You can check out the show notes if you're a visual learner and print out the tips.

Talk to you next time!

Episode 2: How to Get Motivated and Unstuck

Dr. Prianca speaks from her experience as a physician, coach, and mother.

In this episode you will learn:

• The importance of aligning goals and values
• What about goals gets you stuck
• The purpose of stepping into your identity

To end burnout and exhaustion and get your peace of mind back, check out her free masterclass on 4 steps to overcome burnout, get rid of overwhelm, and get your peace of mind back.

https://program.stresscleansemd.com/4-secrets-to-living-a-life-you-ll-love-podcast

If you want to work with Coach Prianca Naik, MD, go to

www.priancanaikmdcoaching.as.me to book a 30-minute consultation call

Follow Dr. Prianca on social media:

https://www.facebook.com/prianca.naik

https://www.instagram.com/doctorprianca

https://www.linkedin.com/in/prianca-naik-md-0524a196/

Join her FREE Facebook group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/646992382603860

[FULL TRANSCRIPT BELOW:]

Hello and welcome, everyone.

I am so excited to have the privilege of chatting with you again!

Today I want to talk about an issue that many of my clients come to me with.

The feeling of being stuck.

This is a common issue amongst accomplished type A mothers.

Many of us go along a path we believe has already been paved for us.

I can speak to being a physician. College, then medical school, then residency, some do fellowship then a job. So much stuyding and training to get to the final destination of working, seeing patients, making an impact, and of course an income as well.

Right?

Perhaps in our personal lives we want ot have kids so we need to find a partner, a sperm donor. Someone with whom we believe we can spend the rest of our lives.

Then a few years in. after a prestigious job, seemingly good marriage, and beautiful children we feel like there's something missing.

We have goals. These can be simple ones-like working out regularly, losing a few pounds. But we cant seem to make the time. I say make bc we can always create the time for what we want to do.

It's not that we don't have the time bc time exists and we can decide how we want to use it.

Or maybe we have a bigger picture goal. Feeling safe in our homes. maybe we live w someone w narcissistic tendencoies or an addiction

We are tired of feeling emotionally and perhaps even physicially unsafe and are tired of walking on egg shells.

We want something more for ourselves and our kids but don't know how to go about getting there. Leave? Oh no that's daunting. It's scary. I will dive into fearing forward, facing our fears in another episode.

Today I want to address how to get unstuck when you have goals but believe you lack motivation.

First, I want you to write down your top two goals right now. They can be big or small.

Then decide what your top 5 values are

Examples of values are

1. Loyalty
2. Humility
3. Compassion
4. Honesty
5. Kindness
6. Integrity
7. Determination
8. Generosity
9. Courage
10. Tolerance
11. Trustworthiness
12. Altruism
13. Empathy
14. Diligence
15. Independence

Those are just a few values, feel free to come up with your own.

Okay now that you've picked 5 of those or of five of your own. Thnk about the flavor of your goals. Do they fall in line with the 5 values you listed?

If not, it's time to rethink those goals and why you want them

If they do then great

Next, ask yourself why you want to lose those 5 lb and do you like your reason? If so, proceed. If not, proceed with caution or rethink what you are trying to accomplish.

If you don't' like your reason-then that is your reason for being unmotivated or stuck.

Once you pick goals that align with your values and you like the reasons behind them, we can get started on unsticking you.

I'm going to discuss how to get unstuck because clients come to me feeling stuck all the time.

So not everything in life is fun right?

Some goals require rote work.

For example, studying in med school issn't really fun for most of us, but we power through.

How do we get out of our own paralysis or self-sabotage ie spending hours scrolling on social media instead of being productive?

How do we get started?

Key is finding goals that truly align w our values

We should start with an identification of an identity. Who we are or who we would like to be.

If it's not who we are now, we might need to have an identity shift.

For example, Who would that person be that loses those 5 lbs or gets that major job promotion?

The person at a healthy weight

probably makes healthy choices

Takes care of her body

Works out regularly

Working our way up the ladder at work-

Deciding we are that high level ceo and coming from that place

Working smart, not hard

Strategizing

Bringing a ton of value to the table

If it's an identity we have in the back of our minds to adhere to, then it's much easier to keep our actions in line with achieving our desired goal

Here are some additional ways you can get unstuck and get started on achieving all that you want to achieve

Find Accountability partner-friend, find one in an online social media group check in daily on how you're making your goals happen

I have an accountability partner I met in a business coaching program over a year and a half ago and we check in daily with our to do;s, goals nad progress

We list our goals for the day each morning and say how our day went that same evening.

This created external accountability and pressure to get things done.

Another way to create external accountability is to-invest money into it. If you want to lose weight, hire a personal trainer, or if there are changes you want to make in your life but can't seem to get momentum, you can hire a therapist or life coach. If you're spending money on something, you're less likely to skip out on the appointments and action steps to achieve your goal.

Another useful tip is to

Use mel robbins 5 second rule-look it up or buy her book (no affiliation here)

When you ponder acting or not acting on your goal, count down 5-4-3-2-1 and physically move or your brain will stop you.

• Start by counting backward to yourself: 5-4-3-2-1. The counting will help you focus on the goal or commitment and distract you from the worries, thoughts, and fears in your mind. As soon as you reach "1," move. That's it.
• This Rule will work every time you use it as long as you move with the number 1.
• The Rule is a simple, research-backed metacognition tool that creates immediate and lasting behavior change.

Metacognition awareness and understanding of one's own thought processes.

Which can help us beat our brain's usual protective mechanism of sticking to routine and stagnation in order to accomplish our greater goals.

Another way to get unstuck is to

Create manageable goals-clients come to me wanting to go from zero to 6 hours of exercise a week

This is a lofty goal

Doing something for 5 minutes is a good way to just start

Making the goal easier to achieve.

For example, putting on workout clothes first thing in the morning and deciding to do 10 minutes 5 days a week

This will help you get into a rhythm and realize you can do it

Once you see you're capable, you will increase to working out more

When we create daunting tasks and goals, we often get paralyzed.

Keep things simple

less is more!

Another tried and true way to get your goals going is the concept of pairing.

Pairing is when you tether your activity to something you do daily already.

For example, Pair working out with brushing your teeth make it a nonnegotiable

or

You can't watch real housewives unless you're on the elliptical

And

Finally

PRETEND

Fake it til you make it bc we can trick our brains into believing we are motivated

Pretend you're motivated

Act as if you're motivated

Ask yourself:

If I were motivated what would I do and then do that.

Voila, you'll get into action mode

Try one or all of these tips and let me know how you do.

Episode 1: Your Dream Life Starts with Intention

In the first podcast episode, Dr. Prianca opens the discussion on how self-awareness is key in achieving goals and fighting off stagnation. All of us have probably already felt stuck at some point.

But do you know what being stuck reveals about our goals?

Dr. Prianca explains how you can tell if a goal is worth pursuing or not and the tricks that will help you achieve what you want to achieve.

What you will learn:

• How professional moms experience paralysis
• Values and goals need to be aligned
• The importance of understanding your own identity
• How to get out of your own way

To end burnout and exhaustion and get your peace of mind back, check out her free masterclass on 4 steps to overcome burnout, get rid of overwhelm, and get your peace of mind back.

https://program.stresscleansemd.com/4-secrets-to-living-a-life-you-ll-love-podcast

If you want to work with Coach Prianca Naik, MD, go to

www.priancanaikmdcoaching.as.me to book a 30-minute consultation call

Check out Dr. Prianca's website:

www.stresscleansemd.com

Follow Prianca on social media:

https://www.facebook.com/prianca.naik

https://www.instagram.com/doctorprianca

https://www.linkedin.com/in/prianca-naik-md-0524a196/

Join her FREE Facebook group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/646992382603860

[FULL TRANSCRIPT BELOW:]

I am so excited to launch this podcast and bring this very first episode to you!

I am Dr. Prianca Naik. I am a board-certified IM physician as well as a certified life coach. I was trucking along in my life until I had a child, and then boom! My world got turned upside down. My type-A personality along with my tendency to stress out and be anxious, went from being an asset to a liability real quick!

When I returned to work after my maternity leave, I knew things had to change fast. Through my own self-help journey, support group attendance, mindfulness practice, and coaching, I began to emerge from my state of drowning feeling and find happiness and peace truly for the first time in my life. As I went further in my coaching journey, I learned to love myself, chase my dreams, and left full-time medicine to become a full-time coach.

I am bringing my expertise as a full-time working doctor mom to you to help you shift out of survival mode and into your best life.

Today I want to talk about the purpose of this podcast. I want to make a positive impact on professional mothers who are silently suffering with the seemingly perfect life and help them to thrive.

In this podcast, I will address age old problems like women taking the majority of the home burden, along with more taboo topics like addiction, abuse, sexual dysfunction, dysfunction with modern solutions and a fresh approach!

My hope with this podcast is that you will walk away with lessons that will help you break free of societal chains and cages to give the finger to generational trauma and emerge to live your best life.

So let's dive into today's topic, which is living a life with intention.

many of us go aimlessly through life wondering why certain things are happening to us when in reality the power of our experience lies 100%within us.

Take that in. we have the power. We are in complete control of our life experience.

We are women and so damn strong. We are powerful creatures who have clearly gotten this far in our lives.

We have successful careers and children. Neither of those are easy to come by!

We made all the right choices.

Perhaps we went to an ivy league school or we were always smart in school or we have worked our way up the corporate ladder in our careers, we married the right guy on paper or otherwise.

Yet we look at our lives and we are so dissatisfied. Work takes so much out of us that we are in survival mode just trying to get by from one day to the next when all we have is this precious amazing life.

We come home from work with maybe more work to do and so little to give to our partners and children.

What gives?

Many of us are living without really thinking or we are living according to how we think we should based on what we've been taught or other people's opinions of us.

How about we take a close look at our own lives and decide what we want without people pleasing or shoulding all over ourselves.

Let me put it this way:

We planned going to college or graduate school. Many of us planned to get married and eventually have babies and yet we don't put thought into what we want to get out of life and of course, with no planning and thought-how can we possibly be happy?

Here is the solution:

The concept is simple. Intention.

Grab a pen and sheet of paper and jot some notes down.

Or come back to this podcast later if you're driving.

What do you want your life to look like?

Think about your career, your relationships, your hobbies, what brings you joy, where you want to be, what you want to own, how much money you want to have.

What is your ideal day today and tomorrow?

How about in one year, in 3 years, and in 5 years?

This can be different for everyone.

There is no right or wrong answer.

The idea of doing this may be overwhelming.

I'm going to give you a few options with which to approach this:

-you can dedicate time, only 5 minutes, daily for a few weeks

-you can make a vision board either on paper or with an app like canva

-you can write it down and make a list

-you can dream about it first thing in the morning or before you go to bed at night

This will help to get your brain in focus on what you want.

That is the first step to getting the life you want. To building your Dream life.

To all the naysayers who insist that life sucks and that we have no control. I respectfully disagree.

We have so much intelligence, strength and power and we can do hard things.

I'm going to give a client example:

I had a physician client in an abusive relationship. Her spouse, who is also a physician, emotionally and physically abused her. Every day she was miserable and she felt as though she was just getting by. She was exhausted from work and would dread entering her home each evening, feeling like she was walking on eggshells or not knowing what kind of instability or abuse she was in store for that day.

In our first session, I asked her what was the number one thing she wanted in her life.

Her answer: She said she wanted to feel safe-emotionally and physically.

That's a basic…right?

Well, not for everyone.

In a world that often shames people for leaving unhealthy situations or shames the situation itself, it can feel nearly impossible to take action.

She wanted safety. What actions did she need to take in order to get that?

Moving out.

That's a pretty big step, right?

Well, the idea of moving out was understandably daunting for her, so she sat with that for a few months.

However, as she worked on self-love, she was able to love herself enough to do what was right for her regardless of how it would affect her spouse or what others might think about her seemingly perfect life.

One fine day, after he physically assaulted her, she left and moved out. It wasn't easy but it was simple.

She moved through a lot of grief. Facing the reality of what was and letting go of the fantasy of what could have been.

But you know what? She found herself in complete and utter peace.

She began truly finding joy in everyday. She was no longer just surviving. After a few months of us working together, she began to thrive and build her dream life.

She was no longer a victim of her circumstances, but in complete control of her life experience.

She figured out what she wanted and made it happen as difficult it was.

Difficult. But simple!

In a seemingly dark situation, she found light and happinesss.

She's not special in the sense that anyone of us can do the seemingly impossible.

Her major move began with a thought, an intention. I want to be safe.

And with time, she made it happen .

Even if you feel stuck.

Anything is truly possible.

But it has to start with a thought, an intention

By shifting your focus on what's possible, you can start to actually make it happen

Try one of the options I discussed today and let me know how it goes.