The Expat Files: Living in Latin America

- Many 1st World Gringos and Expats come down to Latin

America with a shortage of cash and resources, and some with perhaps

with just enough dough to live for a period of 6 months to a year or so.

One of the quickest and easiest job options for them is an English

teaching job. In that area there are four good and sure options to

choose from. That said, today we’ll answer one of the many emails that

specifically addresses the subject of teaching English in Latin America…

-After

a year or so on the job, about half the Gringo English teachers in

Latin American private k-12 schools end up finding a niche that turns

into a nice business opportunity. On the other hand, half of the Gringo

English teachers stay on the job for years with no desire to leave. So

even if they stumble on a great business idea or two or three (and most

eventually do), they still don’t bother to chase the carrot. Why?

Because in Latin America teachers (especially Gringo teachers) are

respected and admired by both parents and kids alike (what a unique

concept!) Today we provide some stories and proof of

concept…               

-You certainly know, and are probably

quite irritated, about the great illegal migration of uneducated,

unwashed masses from Latin America- coming to a neighborhood near you.

Still, everyone wonders how dirt poor people can afford to pay the $2000

to $10000 it costs to hire a “coyote” to get them across safely. People

rightly ask, if they can scrape together that kind of dough why are

they in such a hurry to leave? The fact is in the states today, half of

the average adult population can’t even scrape together $500 in cash!

Today we’ll get to see exactly how poor Latins gather up the necessary dough. You’ll certainly be surprised…

-Visit me Johnny (and Expat super-blogger John Galt) at our new joint website www.TheNewExpat.com

. Its where you’ll get real “boots on the ground” info, experienced

expat blogs and reports. It’s a work in progress so please be patient.

We’re continually improving and expanding the format.

 -Be sure to check out my "Expat Files" YouTube channel -and become a subscriber (it’s free!)

 -NEWS FLASH!

At

www.TheNewExpat.com we have a new feature: a blog written by a very

trusted Latin lawyer (with great credentials). He will be blogging

regularly from Central America touching on everything you want to know

about Latin Legal issues such as residency, passports, contracts, S.A.

corporations, banking, Trusts, courts, lawsuits, and much more. He’ll

stress all manner of Latin Legal issues as they pertain to Expats.

Better yet, you’ll be able to contact him and email your own legal

questions too…

 CONSULT WITH JOHNNY- SCHEDULE A CELL OR SKYPE CALL:

Would you like a 1 on 1 personal Skype or phone consult with me? Set up

a time when we can talk and sort out your own specific Latin American

plans. Just put the word “CONSULT” in the subject line and send a short

list of your questions and talking points to: [email protected]

- By now you’ve heard from many sources that Latin Americans are some

of the happiest people in the world. But do you know which of the 20

Latin countries are rated lowest on that list? They’re still happy

campers but just less so… Today we’ll talk about the three Latin

countries whose people aren’t quite as happy or carefree as the others.

Can you guess these three countries? -Although we can’t get exact

figures, it’s really true that perhaps 95% of Latins would love to

migrate to the states. Even when presented with the facts, Latins firmly

believe the hype and propaganda (the golden land of opportunity and plenty bit).

Now to take the hype one step further, it seems even those immensely

popular Latin soap opera “tele-novellas” are getting into the act. Every

weeknight night on TV some soap or other presents a highly improbable

and vapid tale of some poor Latin unfortunate slipping in to the states

illegally and finding the so called “American dream”. It’s really an

unintentional(?) and powerful migratory marketing promotion in disguise.

-A discussion on health clubs and muscle-bound Latin fitness

fanatics. Every country has them, and Latin America is no exception. -When

doing business in Latin America, what are the best ways to make

dependable and cheap phone calls back to the states? Here’s the scoop… -Visit me Johnny (and Expat super-blogger John Galt) at our new joint website www.TheNewExpat.com

. Its where you’ll get real “boots on the ground” info, experienced

expat blogs and reports. It’s a work in progress so please be patient.

We’re continually improving and expanding the format. -Be sure to check out my "Expat Files" YouTube channel -and become a subscriber (it’s free!) -NEWS FLASH! At

www.TheNewExpat.com we have a new feature: a blog written by a very

trusted Latin lawyer (with great credentials). He will be blogging

regularly from Central America touching on everything you want to know

about Latin Legal issues such as residency, passports, contracts, S.A.

corporations, banking, Trusts, courts, lawsuits, and much more. He’ll

stress all manner of Latin Legal issues as they pertain to Expats.

Better yet, you’ll be able to contact him and email your own legal

questions too…  CONSULT WITH JOHNNY- SCHEDULE A CELL OR SKYPE CALL:

Would you like a 1 on 1 personal Skype or phone consult with me? Set up

a time when we can talk and sort out your own specific Latin American

plans. Just put the word “CONSULT” in the subject line and send a short

list of your questions and talking points to: [email protected]

Latin Americans and “customer service”:Latin businesses

have customer service desks, departments and more than ample personnel

manning them. Workers and customer service reps will nearly always

attend you with sincerity and a smile. However there is a huge “lag

time” difference between what kind of help and final results you might

get down here and the sort of resolutions you come to expect to when

dealing with customer service problems up in the states. The question is: What would you prefer?...

#1-Happy smiley Latin attendants who are truly sorry about your

complaints but never seem to solve problems to your satisfaction… or

#2-Would you rather gets results and deal with a cranky, snippy,

stateside person who absolutely hates his/her job? -Captain Mango chimes in on GMO’s and BT crops in Latin America:

Having been an unwitting (or witting?) BT insecticide spreader in his

past life, Captain Mango gives all of us who are trying to be non-GMO

“Organic” eaters a bit of toxic info to chew on… -Whether its Gringos trying to learn Spanish in the states, or Latins trying to learn English in Latin America, there are a new breed of net-based corporate hucksters laying out juicy bait and promises trying to hook you and your dough.

- Today we have a “Gringo’s eye view” up front and personal: a boots on the ground walk through not one but two dirty,

filthy, amazingly chaotic, Latin government immigration offices: one in

a huge city of 2 million plus people and one in a very small town of

about 10,000 population. Note: There are huge differences (you’ll see). You’ll

see just how average Latin people manage to maneuver their way through

the amazingly inefficient and mind-numbing maze of a bureaucracy without the aid of lawyers or outside support. That’s why even simple procedures can take days and repeated return trips. You’ll

see how it seems an almost impossible task for even a Spanish speaking

native to get anything accomplished yet they somehow eventually slog on

through and get it done. Why? Simply because 95% of Latins have much,

much, much more time than money. As for me, every time I see a

long stagnant line outside of a government building it makes me think of

that room full of monkeys on typewriters, who- given an infinite amount

of time- can eventually type out the bible. -GMO’s and BT crops in Latin America: yes they’ve been legalized in certain Latin Countries and here’s the breakdown… -Visit me Johnny (and Expat super-blogger John Galt) at our new joint website www.TheNewExpat.com

. Its where you’ll get real “boots on the ground” info, experienced

expat blogs and reports. It’s a work in progress so please be patient.

We’re continually improving and expanding the format. -Be sure to check out my "Expat Files" YouTube channel -and become a subscriber -NEWS FLASH! At

www.TheNewExpat.com we have a new feature: a blog written by a very

trusted Latin lawyer (with great credentials). He will be blogging

regularly from Central America touching on everything you want to know

about Latin Legal issues such as residency, passports, contracts, S.A.

corporations, banking, Trusts, courts, lawsuits, and much more. He’ll

stress all manner of Latin Legal issues as they pertain to Expats.

Better yet, you’ll be able to contact him and email your own legal

questions too…  CONSULT WITH JOHNNY- SCHEDULE A CELL OR SKYPE CALL:

Would you like a 1 on 1 personal Skype or phone consult with me? Set up

a time when we can talk and sort out your own specific Latin American

plans. Just put the word “CONSULT” in the subject line and send a short

list of your questions and talking points to: [email protected]

- More new evidence the Panama commercial real estate bubble is imploding-Yes, there are large, overripe residential and commercial real estate bubbles throughout Latin America. Even if that wasn’t so, there are so many mindless government bureaucratic hurdles that it’s just not wise to attempt to build any commercial construction project from scratch- not in any large Latin city. However, many of those same hurdles somehow do not exist in when attempting such projects in smaller towns and just outside the big cites (go figure). In short, buy what you like when the bubble pops, but for now, RENT!       -According to experts, 15-20% of Latins have 24/7 internet in the home. Did you know that more than 95% of those connected use the net exclusively for social media and moronic entertainment purposes? Yes, it’s a sad state of affairs, but are percentages any different foe users in the states?-Getting permanent residency in a Latin country is highly recommended, in fact essential. Just a year or so ago the process used to be fairly easy and straightforward- but Latin manana time slow. However, US agencies are now actively throwing up their own mindless barriers for gringos trying to obtain the necessary documents to begin that process. Why? Uncle Sam doesn’t want his sheep to leave the barn.Today we have some first-hand accounts of the newest hurdles one must jump… -Visit me Johnny (and Expat super-blogger John Galt) at our new joint website www.TheNewExpat.com . Its where you’ll get real “boots on the ground” info, experienced expat blogs and reports. It’s a work in progress so please be patient. We’re continually improving and expanding the format. -Be sure to check out my "Expat Files" YouTube channel -and become a subscriber -NEWS FLASH!At www.TheNewExpat.com we have a new feature: a blog written by a very trusted Latin lawyer (with great credentials). He will be blogging regularly from Central America touching on everything you want to know about Latin Legal issues such as residency, passports, contracts, S.A. corporations, banking, Trusts, courts, lawsuits, and much more. He’ll stress all manner of Latin Legal issues as they pertain to Expats. Better yet, you’ll be able to contact him and email your own legal questions too…  CONSULT WITH JOHNNY- SCHEDULE A CELL OR SKYPE CALL: Would you like a 1 on 1 personal Skype or phone consult with me? Set up a time when we can talk and sort out your own specific Latin American plans. Just put the word “CONSULT” in the subject line and send a short list of your questions and talking points to: [email protected]

- What climate changes are we now seeing in Latin America if any. What about those much-favored “perennial spring-like” Alti-Plano regions?-What will happen to the food and water supplies in Latin America if climate changes (in whatever form) become more apparent?-What will happen to Latin big city bad boy gangs as economies slip into the crapper and implode (along with the rest of the world)? Will they move to target the nearby smaller, safer, nicer, cites and neighborhoods?    -Comments on the Latin macho society’s supreme infatuation with “Mujeres de Clima”- sexy TV weather ladies who famously appear on every TV news program.Note: there are no TV weathermen in Latin America. -When very bad first-world habits invade Latin America:We know that everything from the states (the good, the bad and the permanently ugly) eventually gets to Latin America. Some positive first-world arrivals can be good, but when awful and idiotic stuff arrive the “lag time” effect is never long enough to suit many of us Expats. In truth, some “lag times” should be stretched to infinity!       . -Visit me Johnny (and Expat super-blogger John Galt) at our new joint website www.TheNewExpat.com . Its where you’ll get real “boots on the ground” info, experienced expat blogs and reports. It’s a work in progress so please be patient. We’re continually improving and expanding the format.-Be sure to check out my "Expat Files" YouTube channel -and become a subscriber-NEWS FLASH! At www.TheNewExpat.com we have a new feature: a blog written by a trusted Latin lawyer (with great credentials). He will be blogging regularly from Central America touching on everything you want to know about Latin Legal issues such as residency, passports, contracts, S.A. corporations, banking, Trusts, courts, lawsuits, and much more. He’ll stress all manner of Latin Legal issues as they pertain to Expats. Better yet, you’ll be able to contact him and email your own legal questions too…  CONSULT WITH JOHNNY- SCHEDULE A CELL OR SKYPE CALL: Would you like a 1 on 1 personal Skype or phone consult with me? Set up a time when we can talk and sort out your own specific Latin American plans. Just put the word “CONSULT” in the subject line and send a short list of your questions and talking points to: [email protected]

- Today we have some more personal stores concerning the failed attempts of Latin governments trying to copy the Big Brother state apparatus in Latin America. It's NOT working.Talk about “lag time”! When discussing places “off the Gringo tourist trail”, Latin culture is just not remotely ready for anything resembling what we know as intrusive first-world Big Brother culture. So as far as personal freedoms are concerned, the somewhat predictable Latin "chaos" can be a very good thing (wait…that’s an oxymoron, right?)    -How safe are Latin infrastructure projects? Considering the general Latin lack of detail and proper maintenance, especially with government projects, should Gringos and Expats be overly worried about driving the roads, bridges and overpasses?   -More details concerning Latin bank issued credit cards (VISA /MC).     -Visit me Johnny (and Expat super-blogger John Galt) at our new joint website www.TheNewExpat.com . Its where you’ll get real “boots on the ground” info, experienced expat blogs and reports. It’s a work in progress so please be patient. We’re continually improving and expanding the format. -Be sure to check out my "Expat Files" YouTube channel -and become a subscriber -NEWS FLASH!At www.TheNewExpat.com we have a new feature: a blog written by a very trusted Latin lawyer friend and colleague (with great credentials). He will be blogging regularly from Central America touching on everything you want to know about Latin Legal issues such as residency, passports, contracts, S.A. corporations, banking, Trusts, courts, lawsuits, and much more. He’ll stress all manner of Latin Legal issues as they pertain to Expats. Better yet, you’ll be able to contact our Lawyer and email him your own legal questions too…  CONSULT WITH JOHNNY- SCHEDULE A CELL OR SKYPE CALL: Would you like a 1 on 1 personal Skype or phone consult with me? Set up a time when we can talk and sort out your own specific Latin American plans. Just put the word “CONSULT” in the subject line and send a short list of your questions and talking points to: [email protected]

- Today we have emails from a few Canadians, one who felt slighted by a recent E.F. broadcast… - When Gringos/ Expats team up with a Latin business partner(called a “socio”):Often when a great new Latin business idea suddenly presents itself, we gringos feel it important to have a Latin business partner. We think one may be necessary for things to go smoothly, especially to negotiate those early encounters with stifling Latin bureaucracy. Somehow we’re under the impression only a Latin person can jump the hoops since we don’t know the system and our Spanish skills mostly suck (at first). However, chances are great that your Latin “socio” will need you far more than you’ll ever need him. Sooner or later you just might find that he/she will be a constant drain on you.     Who can we thank for the “lag time” effect:-Imagine a world where you will hear not a single awesome or dude -even from flighty, TV, junk-food addicted teenagers! So what does that mean? It means all those annoying English slang, filler words and empty phrases like “awesome and dude” are not yet falling like guano from the tongues of Latins.However, many gringos and pretentious upscale Latins will “dude” you- and certain annoying entitled Latins hopping back and forth to Mijami  do try to impress by spitting out tired gringo slang like polished turds.So how about the future? How long can it last? Expect Costa Ricans to start “dude-ing” their fantasy Facebook friends soon.  -New tips on finding short and long term Latin rentals- while sitting comfortably in your kitchen way up in the 1st world.. -An update on that very inexpensive, locally famous, “Decameron” chain of all-inclusive Latin beach resorts. Why haven’t gringos up north heard of it? Because its 100% Latin owned and operated so the whole experience is in 100% Spanish. In other words, start learnin’        -Visit me Johnny (and Expat super-blogger John Galt) at our new joint website www.TheNewExpat.com . Its where you’ll get real “boots on the ground” info, experienced expat blogs and reports. It’s a work in progress so please be patient. We’re continually improving and expanding the format.  -Be sure to check out my "Expat Files" YouTube channel -and become a subscriber  -NEWS FLASH!At www.TheNewExpat.com we have a new feature: a blog written by a very trusted Latin lawyer friend and colleague (with great credentials). He will be blogging regularly from Central America touching on everything you want to know about Latin Legal issues such as residency, passports, contracts, S.A. corporations, banking, Trusts, courts, lawsuits, and much more. He’ll stress all manner of Latin Legal issues as they pertain to Expats. Better yet, you’ll be able to contact our Lawyer and email him your own legal questions too…   CONSULT WITH JOHNNY- SCHEDULE A CELL OR SKYPE CALL: Would you like a 1 on 1 personal Skype or phone consult with me? Set up a time when we can talk and sort out your own specific Latin American plans. Just put the word “CONSULT” in the subject line and send a short list of your questions and talking points to: [email protected]

- Today we have emails from a few Canadians, one who felt slighted by a recent E.F. broadcast… - When Gringos/ Expats team up with a Latin business partner(called a “socio”):Often when a great new Latin business idea suddenly presents itself, we gringos feel it important to have a Latin business partner. We think one may be necessary for things to go smoothly, especially to negotiate those early encounters with stifling Latin bureaucracy. Somehow we’re under the impression only a Latin person can jump the hoops since we don’t know the system and our Spanish skills mostly suck (at first). However, chances are great that your Latin “socio” will need you far more than you’ll ever need him. Sooner or later you just might find that he/she will be a constant drain on you.     Who can we thank for the “lag time” effect:-Imagine a world where you will hear not a single awesome or dude -even from flighty, TV, junk-food addicted teenagers! So what does that mean? It means all those annoying English slang, filler words and empty phrases like “awesome and dude” are not yet falling like guano from the tongues of Latins.However, many gringos and pretentious upscale Latins will “dude” you- and certain annoying entitled Latins hopping back and forth to Mijami  do try to impress by spitting out tired gringo slang like polished turds.So how about the future? How long can it last? Expect Costa Ricans to start “dude-ing” their fantasy Facebook friends soon.  -New tips on finding short and long term Latin rentals- while sitting comfortably in your kitchen way up in the 1st world.. -An update on that very inexpensive, locally famous, “Decameron” chain of all-inclusive Latin beach resorts. Why haven’t gringos up north heard of it? Because its 100% Latin owned and operated so the whole experience is in 100% Spanish. In other words, start learnin’        -Visit me Johnny (and Expat super-blogger John Galt) at our new joint website www.TheNewExpat.com . Its where you’ll get real “boots on the ground” info, experienced expat blogs and reports. It’s a work in progress so please be patient. We’re continually improving and expanding the format.  -Be sure to check out my "Expat Files" YouTube channel -and become a subscriber  -NEWS FLASH!At www.TheNewExpat.com we have a new feature: a blog written by a very trusted Latin lawyer friend and colleague (with great credentials). He will be blogging regularly from Central America touching on everything you want to know about Latin Legal issues such as residency, passports, contracts, S.A. corporations, banking, Trusts, courts, lawsuits, and much more. He’ll stress all manner of Latin Legal issues as they pertain to Expats. Better yet, you’ll be able to contact our Lawyer and email him your own legal questions too…   CONSULT WITH JOHNNY- SCHEDULE A CELL OR SKYPE CALL: Would you like a 1 on 1 personal Skype or phone consult with me? Set up a time when we can talk and sort out your own specific Latin American plans. Just put the word “CONSULT” in the subject line and send a short list of your questions and talking points to:[email protected]

- I’ve lived all over Latin America both on and off the gringo tourist trail and much prefer the latter. Why not live off the trail where the locals truly like Americans and thus where the “gringo advantage” is alive and well? That said, some expats(especially the new, fresh, green lightly traveled variety) just love tourist trail locations. That’s why today we list 10 good and positive reasons why some might prefer to live with other gringos “ON the tourist trail”. -Some of the so called “expert” expat retirement mags and rags as well as expat living blogs now tout “up and coming” Colombia as the “next” Costa Rica. After hearing today’s rant, you’ll still want to visit the place but probably won’t want to live or invest there. However, with Sofia Vergara as Colombia’s unofficial cultural ambassador (with every lonely heat gringo convinced she’s the Colombian girl next door) you can bet the gringos will come, no matter what the underlying facts might be.    -Visit me Johnny (and Expat super-blogger John Galt) at our new joint website www.TheNewExpat.com . Its where you’ll get real “boots on the ground” info, experienced expat blogs and reports. It’s a work in progress so please be patient. We’re continually improving and expanding the format.  -Be sure to check out my "Expat Files" YouTube channel -and become a subscriber  -NEWS FLASH!At www.TheNewExpat.com we have a new feature: a blog written by a very trusted Latin lawyer friend and colleague (with great credentials). He will be blogging regularly from Central America touching on everything you want to know about Latin Legal issues such as residency, passports, contracts, S.A. corporations, banking, Trusts, courts, lawsuits, and much more. He’ll stress all manner of Latin Legal issues as they pertain to Expats. Better yet, you’ll be able to contact our Lawyer and email him your own legal questions too…   CONSULT WITH JOHNNY- SCHEDULE A CELL OR SKYPE CALL: Would you like a 1 on 1 personal Skype or phone consult with me? Set up a time when we can talk and sort out your own specific Latin American plans. Just put the word “CONSULT” in the subject line and send a short list of your questions and talking points to: [email protected]