Divorce leaves empty seats—at games, recitals, and milestones. At first, I thought I had to fight for that spot. But I learned you don’t prove love in a courtroom or an argument—you prove it by showing up. Kids remember who stayed consistent, even when life got complicated.

Why it’s important:In Earned, Not Given, I share how I stopped chasing validation and focused on presence. Too many parents waste energy fighting over control instead of showing up for their kids. This matters because children don’t remember the conflict—they remember who was there in their corner, time after time.

📖 Earned, Not Given is coming soon.

Discover the heartfelt stories of John Rinaldo—author of Remi’s Journey, Rediscovering Vancouver, and Dancing Letters. Each book inspires hope, healing, and wonder. Available now on Amazon.

The Positive Pen is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

Divorce already takes so much from children. They don’t need the extra weight of conflict. Choosing calm over arguments isn’t weakness—it’s strength. It shows kids they’re safe, steady, and loved, no matter what.

Why it’s important:In Earned, Not Given, I share how reacting in anger only created more confusion for my children. Learning to respond with calm gave them stability during chaos. Parents need to know: peace is the greatest gift you can give your kids after divorce.

📖 Earned, Not Given is coming soon.

Discover the heartfelt stories of John Rinaldo—author of Remi’s Journey, Rediscovering Vancouver, and Dancing Letters. Each book inspires hope, healing, and wonder. Available now on Amazon.

The Positive Pen is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

A simple moment in Montreal—trying to speak French at a diner—turned into something bigger. My daughter laughed, surprised, even proud. It wasn’t about the words. It was about showing I was willing to grow, willing to step into her world.

Why it’s important:Divorce can make parents feel like they’re always losing ground. But kids don’t measure love in court orders or schedules. They see it in the little efforts—the times you show up, try something new, and surprise them. That’s how trust is rebuilt: step by step, word by word.

📖 Earned, Not Given is coming soon.

Discover the heartfelt stories of John Rinaldo—author of Remi’s Journey, Rediscovering Vancouver, and Dancing Letters. Each book inspires hope, healing, and wonder. Available now on Amazon.

The Positive Pen is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

Pizza Fridays were never about the food. They were about creating a tradition that gave my kids stability and laughter during a time when life felt broken. The ratings, the arguments, the jokes—it was our way of being together, even when so much else had changed.

Why it’s important:Divorce leaves parents feeling like they have to make up for what’s missing, but kids don’t need perfection. They need presence. Small traditions like this build trust, joy, and security that no courtroom or custody agreement can replace.

📖 Earned, Not Given is coming soon.

Discover the heartfelt stories of John Rinaldo—author of Remi’s Journey, Rediscovering Vancouver, and Dancing Letters. Each book inspires hope, healing, and wonder. Available now on Amazon.

The Positive Pen is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

As a divorced parent, I carried the weight of missed birthdays and broken holidays. But I’ve learned not to live in the guilt of what I lost. I pour everything into the moments I do get—one call, one hug, one laugh. Kids don’t need perfect. They need you present.

Why it’s important:

In Earned, Not Given, I share how guilt nearly broke me, until I realized presence matters more than perfection. Parents struggling with divorce or co-parenting need this reminder: even small, consistent moments build trust and love. That’s what kids remember.

📖 Earned, Not Given is coming soon.

Discover the heartfelt stories of John Rinaldo—author of Remi’s Journey, Rediscovering Vancouver, and Dancing Letters. Each book inspires hope, healing, and wonder. Available now on Amazon.

The Positive Pen is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

We saw Annie five times because my kids loved it. One son was done, but the others couldn’t get enough. I went anyway—because parenting isn’t about me, it’s about showing their joy matters.

Why it’s important:

Divorce makes it easy to focus on battles. But the real win is saying yes to what brings your kids joy, even when it tests your patience.

📖 Earned, Not Given is coming soon.

Discover the heartfelt stories of John Rinaldo—author of Remi’s Journey, Rediscovering Vancouver, and Dancing Letters. Each book inspires hope, healing, and wonder. Available now on Amazon.

The Positive Pen is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

After a trip, I told my kids about the white sand beaches on the Gulf. I promised we’d go together one day. They didn’t care about the sand—they cared that I kept my word. Trust is built one promise at a time.

Why it’s important:

In Earned, Not Given, I show how broken promises from others taught me to value my own word. These stories matter because children need security when divorce tries to take it away.

📖 Earned, Not Given is coming soon.

Discover the heartfelt stories of John Rinaldo—author of Remi’s Journey, Rediscovering Vancouver, and Dancing Letters. Each book inspires hope, healing, and wonder. Available now on Amazon.

The Positive Pen is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

Divorce isn’t about winning or being innocent—it’s about how you show up for your kids. No judge, lawyer, or therapist can make co-parenting work. Only parents can choose peace. Keep fighting, and you risk losing your kids’ trust. Choose differently—for them.

Why it’s important:In Earned, Not Given, I share how divorce stripped life down to the basics—and how co-parenting wasn’t something a court could fix. These stories matter because too many parents believe legal battles will create peace, when the truth is only parents themselves can choose it. Kids deserve stability, and trust is fragile—it can take years to rebuild once it’s broken.

📖 Earned, Not Given is coming soon.

Discover the heartfelt stories of John Rinaldo—author of Remi’s Journey, Rediscovering Vancouver, and Dancing Letters. Each book inspires hope, healing, and wonder. Available now on Amazon.

The Positive Pen is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

When traveling for work, I sent postcards. Simple, short notes—“I miss you,” “wish you were here.” My ex dismissed them, but I knew the truth: kids remember effort. They remember when you reach for them, even across distance.

Why it’s important:In Earned, Not Given, I talk about surviving work travel and co-parenting battles. Presence isn’t only physical—it’s emotional and consistent.

📖 Earned, Not Given is coming soon.

Discover the heartfelt stories of John Rinaldo—author of Remi’s Journey, Rediscovering Vancouver, and Dancing Letters. Each book inspires hope, healing, and wonder. Available now on Amazon.

The Positive Pen is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.