The Hardcore Therapist

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Today I’m joined by Jame McElroy, the owner and creator behind Two Crow Collective, a small-batch clothing company rooted in punk culture, storytelling, and advocacy. Two Crow started from Jame’s background in screen-printing, music, and DIY creativity, and has grown into a brand that raises awareness around chronic illness, mental health challenges, and disabilities. I’m excited to talk with Jame about punk, creativity, building something meaningful from the ground up, mental health, chronic illness awareness, and why clothing can become more than merch it can become connection, identity, and a way for people to feel understood.

https://twocrowcollective.com/

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In this episode of The Hardcore Therapist, I take on the complicated question of what happens when a marriage has emotionally ended, but the family structure stays intact because everyone is afraid of what separation might do to the children. Inspired by a listener’s situation, the conversation explores emotionally disconnected “roommate” marriages, financial dependence, outside relationships, co-parenting, and the difference between protecting children and keeping them inside an unhealthy emotional environment.

The research is more nuanced than “divorce is bad” or “unhappy parents should leave.” What matters greatly is the emotional climate children are living in: conflict, withdrawal, emotional availability, stability, boundaries, and whether they are being pulled into adult problems.

Sarah also looks at the harder questions: Are both people actually trying to repair the marriage? Are finances a genuine obstacle or a reason to avoid making a decision? If there is another relationship, what is everyone really consenting to? And most importantly, what are your children learning about love by watching you?

This episode isn’t about telling anyone to stay or leave. It’s about honesty, responsibility, and creating the healthiest family system realistically available.

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Today I’m joined by Davis Driver, a Portland-based vegan straight edge hardcore vocalist and Bassist known for his work with  What It Meant, Reflect,  XfortuneX, and Life Force. Davis has been part of projects that carry forward the raw, urgent spirit of straight edge hardcore music rooted in conviction, community, resistance, and the reminder that straight edge still matters. I’m excited to talk with him about Portland hardcore, vegan straight edge, scene connection, mental health, and what it means to keep these values alive now.

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In this episode of The Hardcore Therapist, I explore polyamory, throuples, jealousy, attachment, boundaries, and the question underneath it all: Am I enough and am I actually getting enough?

This isn’t about judging non-monogamy. It’s about what helps relationships work: honest communication, clear agreements, self-awareness, emotional regulation, and making sure everyone’s needs matter.

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Today I’m joined by Joseph Thomas of There Were Wires, a band that came out of Boston’s chaotic hardcore and post-hardcore world, making music that holds intensity, atmosphere, and a lot of emotional weight.

There Were Wires are returning with Vessel, their first new full-length in more than two decades, out through Iodine Recordings on June 26th. The record reflects a band coming back after years of life experience  grief, exhaustion, persistence, trust, and the kind of heaviness that feels different when you are no longer writing from the same place you were when you were younger.

What stands out to me is that this doesn’t feel like a band trying to recreate the past. It feels like people returning to music with more perspective, more restraint, and more room for the songs to breathe. Vessel was written and recorded over time, in a home studio, without the same pressure or deadlines that often shape records earlier in a band’s life.

I’m excited to talk with Joseph about joining There Were Wires for this chapter, returning to heavy music after decades of life, the emotional weight of Vessel, and how creativity can become a way to process grief, fear, and change.

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In this episode of The Hardcore Therapist, I’m talking about co-parenting after divorce, especially when a new marriage, stepchildren, former partners, guilt, resentment, and unresolved family conflict all become part of the same system.

I break down the difference between healthy co-parenting and overfunctioning, why children should never become messengers between households, how to protect your current marriage without abandoning your kids, and why boundaries need follow-through—not just repeated explanations. We also look at when parallel parenting may be healthier than trying to force cooperation in a high-conflict relationship.

The question underneath all of it is simple: Are you building the family you have now, or still organizing your life around the conflict from the family you had before?

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Today I’m joined by Scott Crawford, a multi-talented filmmaker, musician, writer, and documentarian who directed Salad Days: A Decade of Punk in Washington, DC. A D.C. native who started the fanzine Metrozine as a teenager, Scott brings an insider’s perspective to the DIY spirit, community, and cultural force of the D.C. punk and hardcore scene, including bands like Minor Threat, Bad Brains, Government Issue, Rites of Spring, and Fugazi.

Scott also directed CREEM: America’s Only Rock ’n’ Roll Magazine, which explores the influential Detroit publication’s impact on music journalism, rock criticism, and outsider culture. His newest documentary, Something Better Change, follows D.O.A. frontman Joe Keithley as he takes the politics of punk from the stage into public office.

I’m really excited to talk with Scott about hardcore, storytelling, subculture, memory, politics, DIY ethics, and why documenting these scenes matters — not just historically, but emotionally.

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After divorce, readiness for love is not measured only by time it is measured by whether you can enter a relationship without performing, self-silencing, or falling in love with someone’s potential. I explore how to recognize genuine readiness, evaluate present behavior, communicate needs without emotional begging, and choose a partner who wants the person you are now.

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Today I’m joined by Ryan Smith, the musician behind Rain the Shining. Rain the Shining is Ryan’s Baltimore-based music project, blending guitar-driven indie rock with roots in hardcore and punk. His music carries that tension between reflection and resistance — songs about time, memory, disappointment, injustice, and trying to make something honest out of what life gives you. His album In a Haze of Younger Days looks at what it means to meet your younger self and sit with who you’ve become, and his newer single “Take a Seat” leans into a more direct protest energy. I’m really excited to talk with Ryan about hardcore, songwriting, mental health, creativity, and what it means to keep making art as life changes.

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In this tribute episode, I reflect on the death of Lou Koller of Sick of It All and what it means when a band becomes woven into the story of your life. I share memories of seeing Sick of It All throughout several decades in Detroit and explore how music can hold our grief, identity, community, and connection to younger versions of ourselves.

This episode is about legacy, the emotional impact artists can have on people they never personally meet, and the importance of telling people what they mean to us while we still have the opportunity.

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