Tiny regulation beats big resolve; two minutes can calm a body carrying suicide loss. 

Journal prompt: “One thing my body asked for (and what I did)…”

Small regulation beats big resolve. Today is about tools you’ll actually use in under two minutes.

A Flicker (Hope) — Your body gives you clues
Jaw unclenches after a slower exhale. Shoulders drop when you step outside. A tiny shift is still a shift—keep it.

To Rebuild (Healing) — 3 quick resets (pick one)
Orienting (60–90s): Look around and name 5 things you see, 3 you hear, 1 you feel on your skin.
3-3-6 breath (60s): Inhale 3 • hold 3 • exhale 6. Repeat 5 times.
Warm/Cold contrast (30–60s): Warm drink or cool splash on wrists/face → slow exhale.

Take a Step (Becoming) — Pre-game your transitions
Choose one daily transition (wake-up, commute, post-work). Pair it with a 60–90 second reset above. Put it on your calendar as “Regulate first.”

Choose-your-energy menu:

•  Hollow (low): 3-3-6 breath for one minute. Stop there.
•  Healing (medium): Do orienting + a long exhale before your next task.
•  Becoming (higher): Attach a reset to two transitions today (e.g., before email, before sleep).

Food for Thought:
Regulation isn’t about becoming calm; it’s about becoming capable. When your body feels a little safer, choices return. You don’t need perfect peace to move—just enough steadiness to take the next honest inch. That counts, every time.

Exhale. Keep what serves you; leave the rest. I’ll be here again tomorrow. 💜

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Support the show

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The Leftover Pieces is Support for Life After Suicide Loss. Click links below

🎙 Leave me a message: Share a question, your story, or your person’s name for a future episode → theleftoverpieces.com/voicemail

Support After Suicide Loss

If you are grieving after suicide loss, you do not have to carry this alone.

Visit The Leftover Pieces for podcast episodes, grief support, resources, and ways to connect with Melissa’s work: https://theleftoverpieces.com 

or Join Melissa’s email list: https://theleftoverpieces.com/join

If you someone you love is in immediate crisis or may be in danger, please call or text 988 in the United States. You can also text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line

In life after suicide loss, keep what helped, release what didn’t, and set one small plan for the next 24 hours—repeats are allowed. 

Journal prompt: “What I’m keeping from this week is…”

End of first 7 days of October, not an end of you, just of the 1st 7 days of a new month...in a tough season. Today we keep what helped, release what didn’t, and set a small plan for the next 24 hours.

A Flicker (Hope) — Notice what worked once
Which tiny thing warmed the room—witnessing, one brick, a boundary, a bit of light? Keep that. Repeats are allowed.

To Rebuild (Healing) — 24-hour reset
On paper or notes app, write three lines:
• Flicker: one thing you’ll notice (window light, song, candle).
• Brick: one 7–10 minute task (body/home/admin/connection).
• Care: one non-negotiable (water, food, meds, rest).

Take a Step (Becoming) — Tomorrow’s micro-intent
One sentence, present-tense: “Tomorrow I move slowly and finish one thing.” Put it on your lock screen.

Choose-your-energy menu:

•  Hollow (low): Do only the “Care” item. Done.
•  Healing (medium): Do the Brick with a timer; stop when it dings.
•  Becoming (higher): Share your micro-intent with a safe person or post it where you’ll see it.

To Consider Today:
Integration is repetition, not heroics. The way through this season is often the next honest inch, practiced again tomorrow. When you choose a flicker, place a brick, and take one care step, you’re not starting over—you’re continuing. That counts.

Exhale. Keep what serves you; leave the rest. I’ll be here again tomorrow. 💜

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Support the show

__________________________________________________________________________

The Leftover Pieces is Support for Life After Suicide Loss. Click links below

🎙 Leave me a message: Share a question, your story, or your person’s name for a future episode → theleftoverpieces.com/voicemail

Support After Suicide Loss

If you are grieving after suicide loss, you do not have to carry this alone.

Visit The Leftover Pieces for podcast episodes, grief support, resources, and ways to connect with Melissa’s work: https://theleftoverpieces.com 

or Join Melissa’s email list: https://theleftoverpieces.com/join

If you someone you love is in immediate crisis or may be in danger, please call or text 988 in the United States. You can also text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line

In life after suicide loss, boundaries aren’t punishments—they’re blankets; clear limits keep you warm enough to heal. 

Journal prompt: “Today, permission looks like…”

Boundaries aren’t punishments—they’re blankets. Today we practice limits that keep you warm enough to heal.

A Flicker (Hope) — Relief after a clear no
Notice what loosens when you cancel, leave early, or choose quiet. Relief is data. Keep the data.

To Rebuild (Healing) — Scale it, don’t explain it
Use one of these today:
• Time-box: “I can stay 30 minutes.”
• Scale-down: “I’m joining by phone.”
• Opt-out: “I’m skipping this one—catch you next time.”
No five-paragraph essay required.

Take a Step (Becoming) — Pre-write the line
Choose one event this week. Pre-write your boundary and put it in your notes app. Read it once before you go. Use it as needed—early exits count.

Choose-your-energy menu:

•  Hollow (low): Silence your phone for 20 minutes. Do nothing on purpose.
•  Healing (medium): Send one boundary text using a time-box or opt-out.
• Becoming (higher): Remove one non-essential thing from your calendar this week.

Just for Today:
Clarity is a kindness to your future self. Every boundary you practice now becomes a bridge you can cross later when the season gets louder. You’re not withdrawing from love—you’re preserving the conditions under which love (and you) can breathe.

Exhale. Keep what serves you; leave the rest. I’ll be here again tomorrow. 💜

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Support the show

__________________________________________________________________________

The Leftover Pieces is Support for Life After Suicide Loss. Click links below

🎙 Leave me a message: Share a question, your story, or your person’s name for a future episode → theleftoverpieces.com/voicemail

Support After Suicide Loss

If you are grieving after suicide loss, you do not have to carry this alone.

Visit The Leftover Pieces for podcast episodes, grief support, resources, and ways to connect with Melissa’s work: https://theleftoverpieces.com 

or Join Melissa’s email list: https://theleftoverpieces.com/join

If you someone you love is in immediate crisis or may be in danger, please call or text 988 in the United States. You can also text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line

“Carrying forward” includes you—make space for their memory and your life, together. 

Journal prompt: “A way to honor them by honoring me is…”

“Carrying forward” includes you. Today we make room for their memory and your life—together.

A Flicker (Hope) — Connection counts
Their song in a store aisle. A phrase they loved. A photo you pass without bracing. These are ties, not traps. Let one connection feel like company.

To Rebuild (Healing) — A 3-step carry-forward ritual

1. Name: Say their name out loud.
2. Touchstone: Light a candle, play 30 seconds of “their” song, or hold an item.
3. Include: Name one thing you need today (water, rest, fresh air). Do it next.

Take a Step (Becoming) — The “and” sentence
Write one sentence that holds both: “I miss you and I’m making soup,” “I’m aching and I’m paying this bill,” “I’m tearful and I’m taking a walk.” Put it somewhere visible.

Choose-your-energy menu:

•  Hollow (low): Whisper their name and yours. Place a hand on your chest.
•  Healing (medium): Do the 3-step ritual once today.
•  Becoming (higher): Share your “and” sentence with a safe person or in a notes app check-in.

Food for Thought Today:
Love doesn’t demand your disappearance to prove itself. Carrying them forward means building a life sturdy enough to hold their memory without collapsing—and that requires including your needs. Each small “and” you live is a quiet refusal to choose between love and survival. Both belong.

Exhale. Keep what serves you; leave the rest. I’ll be here again tomorrow. 💜

Click to Send a Text or Voicemail to Melissa

Support the show

__________________________________________________________________________

The Leftover Pieces is Support for Life After Suicide Loss. Click links below

🎙 Leave me a message: Share a question, your story, or your person’s name for a future episode → theleftoverpieces.com/voicemail

Support After Suicide Loss

If you are grieving after suicide loss, you do not have to carry this alone.

Visit The Leftover Pieces for podcast episodes, grief support, resources, and ways to connect with Melissa’s work: https://theleftoverpieces.com 

or Join Melissa’s email list: https://theleftoverpieces.com/join

If you someone you love is in immediate crisis or may be in danger, please call or text 988 in the United States. You can also text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line

In life after suicide loss, let light walk beside you—not fix you—just enough to show the next few feet. 

Journal prompt: “Today’s flicker of hope was…”

Witnessing light without forcing it to fix anything. Today we let light walk beside us and do only what light can do—show the next few feet.

A Flicker (Hope) — Light you can actually hold
Morning sun through a window. Moonlight on the driveway. A soft lamp instead of overhead glare. Not profound—present. Let one bit of light keep you company.

To Rebuild (Healing) — One-minute light practice
Step outside or to a window.

1.  Look at the light source (not directly at the sun).
2.  Inhale 4, hold 2, exhale 6—three times.
3.  Name one color you can see more clearly now. That’s it.

Take a Step (Becoming) — Schedule a light ritual
Pick a daily 2–5 minute light moment (sun patch, lamp + tea, porch twilight). Put it on your calendar for the same time each day this week.

Choose-your-energy menu:

•  Hollow (low): Sit by a window for 60 seconds. Breathe out longer than you breathe in.
•  Healing (medium): Take a 5-minute light walk (to mailbox, around the block).
•  Becoming (higher): Set a recurring “light ritual” alarm for the week.

Food for Thought:
Light is a companion, not a cure. You don’t have to wring meaning from it—notice and allow. When the day feels heavy, a single, honest moment of brightness can anchor you long enough to choose your next inch. Reaching for light isn’t denying grief; it’s giving your nervous system something steady to lean on while you carry it all.

Exhale. Keep what serves you; leave the rest. I’ll be here again tomorrow. 💜

Click to Send a Text or Voicemail to Melissa

Support the show

__________________________________________________________________________

The Leftover Pieces is Support for Life After Suicide Loss. Click links below

🎙 Leave me a message: Share a question, your story, or your person’s name for a future episode → theleftoverpieces.com/voicemail

Support After Suicide Loss

If you are grieving after suicide loss, you do not have to carry this alone.

Visit The Leftover Pieces for podcast episodes, grief support, resources, and ways to connect with Melissa’s work: https://theleftoverpieces.com 

or Join Melissa’s email list: https://theleftoverpieces.com/join

If you someone you love is in immediate crisis or may be in danger, please call or text 988 in the United States. You can also text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line

There’s no master plan in suicide bereavement—just small bricks that actually hold. 

Journal prompt: "A way to honor them by honoring me is…"

There’s no master plan—just weather and small bricks. Today is about doable over dazzling so the house you’re rebuilding can actually stand.

A Flicker (Hope) — Small done beats big imagined
Finish one tiny thing: rinse the mug, move bills to one stack, crack a window, light a candle. Finished equals a warmer room. Warmth counts.

To Rebuild (Healing) — Brick-of-the-Day (≤10 minutes)

1. Pick a lane: Body · Home · Admin · Connection. Choose one tiny task.
2. When/Then: “When it’s 10:30, then I’ll start the dishwasher.”
3. Remove friction: set a 7–10 min timer, put items within reach, begin.
    If activation > 6/10, pause, long exhale, pick a lighter brick. Finishing small is the win.

Take a Step (Becoming) — Value → micro-move
Choose a value (steady, truthful, kind, creative, brave, present). Translate to today’s micro-move:
Steady: add a daily 10-minute “Brick” block to your calendar.
Kind: schedule-send a two-sentence check-in to a fellow griever.
Creative: lay out one tool you’ll use tonight.
Brave: message to join/host a small grief-friendly meetup this month.

Choose-your-energy menu:

•  Hollow (low): Drink a full glass of water and change your socks. Done.
•  Healing (medium): Do one Brick-of-the-Day task with a timer. Stop when it dings. Name it out loud.
•  Becoming (higher): Write one sentence for the week (e.g., “Fewer yeses, earlier exits”). Put it where you’ll see it.

Just for Today:
Rebuilding isn’t moving on—it’s creating enough structure to carry love and loss at the same time. Ten honest minutes today beats another day of waiting for perfect conditions. The house you’re making is lived-in, not staged; every small brick is proof you’re still here, still building.

One gentle breath. Keep what serves; leave the rest. I’ll see you tomorrow. 💜

Click to Send a Text or Voicemail to Melissa

Support the show

__________________________________________________________________________

The Leftover Pieces is Support for Life After Suicide Loss. Click links below

🎙 Leave me a message: Share a question, your story, or your person’s name for a future episode → theleftoverpieces.com/voicemail

Support After Suicide Loss

If you are grieving after suicide loss, you do not have to carry this alone.

Visit The Leftover Pieces for podcast episodes, grief support, resources, and ways to connect with Melissa’s work: https://theleftoverpieces.com 

or Join Melissa’s email list: https://theleftoverpieces.com/join

If you someone you love is in immediate crisis or may be in danger, please call or text 988 in the United States. You can also text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line

In grief after suicide, witnessing redistributes weight—asked for cleanly, without apology. 

Journal prompt: "What healing looks like—even when I can’t feel it—is…"

Witnessing redistributes weight. Not gone—carried together. Today we practice asking to be seen, cleanly and without apology.

A Flicker (Hope) — You’re allowed to be heard
Five quiet minutes. A nod. A text that lands. Hope isn’t a speech; it’s an accurate reflection without fixing.

To Rebuild (Healing) — The five-minute witnessing ask
Text: “Could you hold five minutes for me today? No fixing—just listening.”
Live/Call: “I don’t need solutions—just five minutes to be heard. Is now okay?”
If no one’s free: 3–5 min voice memo, a not-sent letter, or a 60-second mirror check (one feeling, one need, one next inch).

Take a Step (Becoming) — A boundary you’ll actually use
Draft one sentence for this week:
“I’m heading out now; I’ve met my limit.”
“I’m skipping this year, but I hope it’s meaningful for you.”
“Listening is all I need right now.”

Choose-your-energy menu:
Hollow (low): 5-4-3-2-1 grounding (see, touch, hear, smell, taste). Stop there.
Healing (medium): Send the five-minute ask—or schedule it. If no person, record a 3-minute memo.
Becoming (higher): Use your boundary once in a low-stakes moment.

Food for Thought Today:
Your story isn’t a public utility. Curate who gets access. Clarity is care. You don’t owe anyone a perfect explanation to deserve compassion; a simple “this is what I need” is enough. It’s also okay if the right listener isn’t available today—self-witnessing still counts, and choosing silence can be a boundary, not a failure. Keep practicing these small, clear asks until your body believes you’re safe to be heard.

Exhale. Keep what serves you; leave the rest. I’ll be here again tomorrow. 💜

Click to Send a Text or Voicemail to Melissa

Support the show

__________________________________________________________________________

The Leftover Pieces is Support for Life After Suicide Loss. Click links below

🎙 Leave me a message: Share a question, your story, or your person’s name for a future episode → theleftoverpieces.com/voicemail

Support After Suicide Loss

If you are grieving after suicide loss, you do not have to carry this alone.

Visit The Leftover Pieces for podcast episodes, grief support, resources, and ways to connect with Melissa’s work: https://theleftoverpieces.com 

or Join Melissa’s email list: https://theleftoverpieces.com/join

If you someone you love is in immediate crisis or may be in danger, please call or text 988 in the United States. You can also text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line

After suicide loss, the “hollow” isn’t failure—it’s space where hope, healing, and becoming can actually take root. 

Journal prompt: Today’s flicker of hope was…

This week..."Hope in the Hollow" 

Now, October. After the volume of Suicide Awareness Month, we drop into the quieter work. This DAILY NUGGET Series is centered on Hope, Healing, Becoming. It’s here to carry us—and embolden us—through a tough stretch of the year. We didn’t choose this road, but we can choose how we respond to it.  This month, we practice the response—the inch we can actually take.

Here’s how the daily rhythm will go. Each episode is 5–7 minutes and touches three beats:

• Flicker (Hope): what’s true right now—a small light you can actually hold.
• Rebuild (Healing): one concrete practice that steadies your body, heart, or world.
• Step (Becoming): a gentle move toward who you’re becoming, without abandoning who you’ve been.

You’ll also get a short journal prompt & a three‑option “choose your energy” menu so you can pick the action that fits today. No gold stars. No toxic positivity. Just honest company and workable steps. 

Flicker (Hope) — The hollow isn’t empty 
After the casseroles and check-ins fade, the hollow remains—the space grief carved. Not nothingness. Space. Quiet enough to hear your own breath.
Hope belongs here because you’re still here. It’s not a floodlight; it’s a cupped match. Let one warm thing count today. That’s enough.

Rebuild (Healing) — 90 seconds to lower activation
You don’t need to be “triggered” to deserve care. When the body spikes, go small:

• Name & notice (30s): “Right now I feel… [tight chest / foggy / restless].”
• 4-count breath (45s): In 4 • hold 4 • out 6–8. Repeat 5–6 times.
• One brick (15s): Tiny action—sip water, crack a window, text “I’m here.” Bricks, not blueprints.

Step (Becoming) — A micro-act that includes you
Becoming isn’t betrayal. Carry them—and you. Pick one identity word (listener, maker, advocate, steady, seeker). Do a ≤10-min act that fits lay out your journal, chop one ingredient, confirm a therapy slot, stand in the sun. Put it on the calendar. Small on purpose; momentum over spectacle.

Choose‑your‑energy menu:

• If you’re in the hollow (low capacity): Put both feet on the floor and breathe out longer than you breathe in, five times. That’s the whole assignment.
• If you’re in healing mode (medium capacity): Send this text to one safe person: “Could you witness me for five minutes today—no fixing, just ears?”
• If you’re ready to become (higher capacity): Do your ten‑minute identity micro‑act. When you’re done, say their name and yours. Both belong.

Take a breath. Notice what softened. Keep only what helps. I’ll be here again tomorrow. Talk soon. 💜

Click to Send a Text or Voicemail to Melissa

Support the show

__________________________________________________________________________

The Leftover Pieces is Support for Life After Suicide Loss. Click links below

🎙 Leave me a message: Share a question, your story, or your person’s name for a future episode → theleftoverpieces.com/voicemail

Support After Suicide Loss

If you are grieving after suicide loss, you do not have to carry this alone.

Visit The Leftover Pieces for podcast episodes, grief support, resources, and ways to connect with Melissa’s work: https://theleftoverpieces.com 

or Join Melissa’s email list: https://theleftoverpieces.com/join

If you someone you love is in immediate crisis or may be in danger, please call or text 988 in the United States. You can also text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line

Today I share a recent conversation I had with a two-time suicide loss survivor, including her beloved son Zack in Sept. 2024.

Meet Zack's Mom

Patty Born is a board-certified Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner, licensed massage therapist, and nurse coach-in-training who integrates mind-body care. A two-time suicide loss survivor—her ex-husband (2012) Charlie, and her 19-year-old son, Zachary (Sept 2024)—Patty speaks openly about grief, stigma, and what truly supports healing. Her mission: normalize mental health conversations in healthcare and everyday life, and honor Charlie and Zack through the work she does.

What we discuss:

• Awareness as education: why information isn’t enough without honest, ongoing (hard) conversations.
• Reaching in vs. waiting for a reach-out: how to show up—practically, consistently, without tiptoeing.
• Disconnection as a health issue: the social and communal fractures driving distress—and what rebuilds belonging.
• Mental health is health: integrating mind-body care and making support an ordinary part of life, not a crisis add-on.
• Broadening risk: suicide can touch any family; dismantling stereotypes and widening our “who might need help” lens.
• Inner-circle codes: creating a shared signal for “I need to talk” vs. “I really need to talk”—and how to respond.
• Trauma aftercare: recognizing trauma (acute and cumulative) and the long-tail support people actually need.
• Parenting and loss: honoring Charlie and Zack while navigating meaning, purpose, and the day-to-day.
• Healthcare culture shifts: what clinicians can do differently tomorrow to reduce shame and increase safety.

At the core, this episode insists that connection is protective—and that we can’t wait for people to reach out; we have to reach in. Make help easy with clear signals and simple plans, and treat trauma care like rehab: structured, paced, and long-term. Ditch stereotypes about “who’s at risk,” widen the lens, and talk about mental health the way we talk about any health—openly, without shame. That’s how we honor the people we’ve lost and keep showing up for the ones still here. 💜 

Reach Patty Here: 

Website:

pattyborn.com/home

Facebook: 

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61570524453767

LinkedIn:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/patty-born-81501363

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Support the show

__________________________________________________________________________

The Leftover Pieces is Support for Life After Suicide Loss. Click links below

🎙 Leave me a message: Share a question, your story, or your person’s name for a future episode → theleftoverpieces.com/voicemail

Support After Suicide Loss

If you are grieving after suicide loss, you do not have to carry this alone.

Visit The Leftover Pieces for podcast episodes, grief support, resources, and ways to connect with Melissa’s work: https://theleftoverpieces.com 

or Join Melissa’s email list: https://theleftoverpieces.com/join

If you someone you love is in immediate crisis or may be in danger, please call or text 988 in the United States. You can also text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line

In this September 2025 episode, in the midst of Suicide Awareness Month, I’m widening the lens from life after loss to awareness and advocacy. (BUT...We are NOT taking the preachy "prevention" angle that comes at us non-stop in Sept., I promise!) Writer/storyteller Jamie Brickhouse—a self-described SAS (suicide attempt survivor)—joins me to unpack the alcohol–depression loop, the suicidal mind, and the “why” questions so many of us carry after suicide loss. 

What to Expect

• Jamie’s candid story and what shifted in the aftermath. He is an SAS & had lost 4 close friends to suicide.
• The alcohol ↔ depression cycle: how it feeds on itself & how he interrupted it.
• Why feature an attempt survivor on a show about life after suicide loss—& how awareness supports advocacy and lived legacy.
• Understanding the suicidal mind: distorted thinking, ambivalence, & signs we often miss.
• How & why, Jamie uses his platform now as a survivor and advocate.
• Clear takeaways & closing messages worth sticking around for.
• Links below to connect with Jamie & keep learning.

About Jamie:

"Called “a natural raconteur” by the Washington Post, Jamie Brickhouse is a writer, comedic storyteller, and TEDx speaker. He is the author of Dangerous When Wet: A Memoir of Booze, Sex, and My Mother, has written for the New York Times, Washington Post, Daily Beast, Salon, and Huffington Post. A six-time StorySLAM champion of The Moth, he has appeared on PBS’s Stories from the Stage, The Moth Podcast, recorded voices on Beavis and Butthead, and tours the country with four award-winning solo shows. A two-time suicide attempt survivor and alcoholic in recovery for 16+ years, Jamie’s TEDx talk about his lived experience and the intersection of alcoholism, depression, and suicidality that is part personal narrative and part calls to action has nearly 100k views. Jamie also tells a true story in high heels every day on TikTok where he has over six million views, one million likes, and 75,000 followers." 

Connect with Jamie:

(If you only pick one --- PICK HIS TEDX TALK hands down --- but it's all fabulous!) 

TEDx Jamie Brickhouse 

TikTok Jamie_Brickhouse

Jamie Instagram

http://www.jamiebrickhouse.com/

Red Brick Agency

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Support the show

__________________________________________________________________________

The Leftover Pieces is Support for Life After Suicide Loss. Click links below

🎙 Leave me a message: Share a question, your story, or your person’s name for a future episode → theleftoverpieces.com/voicemail

Support After Suicide Loss

If you are grieving after suicide loss, you do not have to carry this alone.

Visit The Leftover Pieces for podcast episodes, grief support, resources, and ways to connect with Melissa’s work: https://theleftoverpieces.com 

or Join Melissa’s email list: https://theleftoverpieces.com/join

If you someone you love is in immediate crisis or may be in danger, please call or text 988 in the United States. You can also text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line