The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations

Widen the Lens, Reach In; Patty Born on Loss, Connection, & Showing Up


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Today I share a recent conversation I had with a two-time suicide loss survivor, including her beloved son Zack in Sept. 2024.


Meet Zack's Mom

Patty Born is a board-certified Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner, licensed massage therapist, and nurse coach-in-training who integrates mind-body care. A two-time suicide loss survivor—her ex-husband (2012) Charlie, and her 19-year-old son, Zachary (Sept 2024)—Patty speaks openly about grief, stigma, and what truly supports healing. Her mission: normalize mental health conversations in healthcare and everyday life, and honor Charlie and Zack through the work she does.

What we discuss:
  • Awareness as education: why information isn’t enough without honest, ongoing (hard) conversations.
  • Reaching in vs. waiting for a reach-out: how to show up—practically, consistently, without tiptoeing.
  • Disconnection as a health issue: the social and communal fractures driving distress—and what rebuilds belonging.
  • Mental health is health: integrating mind-body care and making support an ordinary part of life, not a crisis add-on.
  • Broadening risk: suicide can touch any family; dismantling stereotypes and widening our “who might need help” lens.
  • Inner-circle codes: creating a shared signal for “I need to talk” vs. “I really need to talk”—and how to respond.
  • Trauma aftercare: recognizing trauma (acute and cumulative) and the long-tail support people actually need.
  • Parenting and loss: honoring Charlie and Zack while navigating meaning, purpose, and the day-to-day.
  • Healthcare culture shifts: what clinicians can do differently tomorrow to reduce shame and increase safety.
At the core, this episode insists that connection is protective—and that we can’t wait for people to reach out; we have to reach in. Make help easy with clear signals and simple plans, and treat trauma care like rehab: structured, paced, and long-term. Ditch stereotypes about “who’s at risk,” widen the lens, and talk about mental health the way we talk about any health—openly, without shame. That’s how we honor the people we’ve lost and keep showing up for the ones still here. 💜 

Reach Patty Here: 

Website:

pattyborn.com/home

Facebook: 

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61570524453767

LinkedIn:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/patty-born-81501363


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💜 The Leftover Pieces is support central for grieving hearts.
🔗 Stay connected: Join my free email community for weekly check-ins, resources, and encouragement.
🌟 For moms: Explore the $9 Lighthouse Community — safe connection, tools, and hope.
🛠 Resources for all grievers: Start here.
🤝 One-on-one grief coaching for moms after child loss to suicide: Learn more here.
📞 Need help now? If you or someone you love is struggling with suicidal thoughts, dial 988 in the U.S. & Canada, or text HOME to 741741.

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The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss ConversationsBy Melissa Bottorff-Arey

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