The Literate ApeCast

Don admits he was both wrong and a big asshole. Moving on from that bombshell, the GentleApes parse out the possibility that we humans are nothing more than machines with consciousness and, if so, why do children not learn to wipe that snot off of their grubby faces? Finally, a bit of YouTube frivolity (in the show notes for your viewing pleasure).

Yes, gang, the guys have six things for you to do so women will find you cool and sexy sans Axe Body Spray.

PLUS, in the show notes is a quick silent video of D&D trying to record a FaceTime call in prep of the bi-coastal ApeCast in a few months.

David has some issues with the gentrification of Hanukkah as secular Jews keep finding ways to make it as big of a deal as Christmas. He also has a big issue with March On’s newest fundraising idea, the “Impeach Boutique” which takes the Chimps in Charge down a gravel road peppered with opportunists taking advantage of 9/11, the genius of John Waters, and the erroneous concept of being on “the right side of history.”

Plus, six things to do this week to keep your soul from shriveling like a drying dog turd on a lawn from underuse.

David has some issues with the gentrification of Hanukkah as secular Jews keep finding ways to make it as big of a deal as Christmas. He also has a big issue with March On’s newest fundraising idea, the “Impeach Boutique” which takes the Chimps in Charge down a gravel road peppered with opportunists taking advantage of 9/11, the genius of John Waters, and the erroneous concept of being on “the right side of history.”

Plus, six things to do this week to keep your soul from shriveling like a drying dog turd on a lawn from underuse.

In a Seinfeldian discussion (“What’s the deal with Black Friday?”) the gorilla your dreams get into the weeds of the question of what discounted thing would either elbow jack an old woman for in a Walmart? Also on deck is the question of what we all did before the internet, that science proves men live longer if they stare at boobs, how naked twins in a shopping cart do ‘sexy stuff,’ and David’s trials with Prince Harry’s fake remote control.

As always, six items of homework for you lost and sad souls to engage in following your turkey-induced coma.

In a Seinfeldian discussion (“What’s the deal with Black Friday?”) the gorilla your dreams get into the weeds of the question of what discounted thing would either elbow jack an old woman for in a Walmart? Also on deck is the question of what we all did before the internet, that science proves men live longer if they stare at boobs, how naked twins in a shopping cart do ‘sexy stuff,’ and David’s trials with Prince Harry’s fake remote control.

As always, six items of homework for you lost and sad souls to engage in following your turkey-induced coma.

OK. Maybe it was a Blue Wave. What does that mean? The gentlemen of ape-itude also cover the legacy of Stan Lee as well as the idea that culture is a costume rather than the single defining aspect of society.

Are you devoting 45 hours a day on Faceborg? Do you spend the other six hours a day binge-drinking and working in your cubicle? Has porn made your genitals dry and used up? DH (squared) have six things to do that will help fulfill at least a few hours of your week.

OK. Maybe it was a Blue Wave. What does that mean? The gentlemen of ape-itude also cover the legacy of Stan Lee as well as the idea that culture is a costume rather than the single defining aspect of society.

Are you devoting 45 hours a day on Faceborg? Do you spend the other six hours a day binge-drinking and working in your cubicle? Has porn made your genitals dry and used up? DH (squared) have six things to do that will help fulfill at least a few hours of your week.

Was it a Blue Wave and will Pelosi become our Beohner? Is Rudy a dick? How did Daredevil Season 3 hold up? Why do the Chimps in Charge hate NaNoWriMo so much?
Yes, six things to do this week to justify your existence and prevent you from becoming a horrifying misanthrope peeing in jars and mumbling about fluoride in the water.

Was it a Blue Wave and will Pelosi become our Beohner? Is Rudy a dick? How did Daredevil Season 3 hold up? Why do the Chimps in Charge hate NaNoWriMo so much?
Yes, six things to do this week to justify your existence and prevent you from becoming a horrifying misanthrope peeing in jars and mumbling about fluoride in the water.

Some episodes, the Chimps In Charge are on the same page. This is not one of them. Crawling down the rabbit hole to discuss trauma, sexual assault, whether Donald Trump’s rhetoric is responsible for the rise of alt Right violence and Thanksgiving foods, this is like CrossFire if CrossFire had been comprised of two profane idiots yelling at each other.

The stuffing inside the ApeCast turkey, stuffed right up it’s ass with love, is a list of six things to watch, read, or do this week because we know your life is a sad, cubicle-rat existence devoted to handing over your life-force for health benefits and donuts on Friday.