The Love Fix

Sherry and Carla start the show talking about toxic masculinity, and how men don't often get the emotional support that women do. They take a Love Fix Question on the main characteristics of a narcissist and then welcome guest Wendy Behary, Founder and Director of the Cognitive Therapy Center of New Jersey, and author of Disarming a Narcissist. Wendy discusses her private practice which is primarily devoted to treating narcissists, partners, and people dealing with them, along with couples experiencing relationship problems. She talks about the most common paths that lead to narcissism, how to set yourself up for confrontation with a narcissist, and why professional help is often needed for the narcissist to transform.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• A Love Fix Question — what are the main characteristics of a narcissist?
• No one is immune to getting attracted or captured under the spell of a narcissist, but not everyone stays.
• Wendy discusses working with narcissistic men directly, what are some of the most common themes she sees in these men?
• Wendy talks about how having a plan set in place when planning to confront or leave a narcissist is critical. You may even look for a narcissism-savvy lawyer in the process.
• A few highlights of Wendy's new book Disarming the Narcissist, along with how to work with Sherry and Carla on overcoming codependency, dating, break-ups, healing from toxic relationships, and gaining confidence.
• What is empathic confrontation, and how can you use it as a better chance of being heard?
• At the end of the day, it's more important for you to hear yourself state your needs and boundaries than it is for the narcissist to hear you.
• How can you tell if there's hope in a relationship with a narcissist, and when you should get out immediately?
• Wendy talks about why professional help is so important when trying to get a narcissist to transform. She details how long it typically takes to see growth and a few of the larger obstacles that show up.
• How to break a trauma bond.
• How is narcissism typically developed, and are people born with it, or is it something that is developed?

Tweetables:

• "No one is immune to getting attracted to or captured under the spell of the narcissist because they can be incredible, particularly in the courtship phase." — Wendy
• "Narcissists get what they want and they know how to get what they want." — Wendy
• "It's not your job to figure out the profile of narcissism, but I do think it's a bit of a gift for liberation." — Wendy
• "The goal is for you to hear yourself. I want to hear me being the best advocate for me that I can be." — Wendy
• "It's really hard without therapy to imagine change that's going to be sustainable." — Wendy
• "I think that in betrayal trauma, which is the most common type of trauma, when you're living with a narcissist, the bond is such that it's not so easy." — Wendy
• "What happens with narcissists is they come into the world with a temperament that might be a little more sensitive, perhaps a little more impulsive, and they meet an environment that cannot adequately meet those needs or … imposes certain high expectations upon them." — Wendy

Connect with Us!

• The Love Fix | @thelovefixpodcast
• Become a Member — Codependency Special — Wake Up Recovery — $1 trial membership
• Join the Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Relationship Transformation Challenge FB group
• The Love Fix Relationship Quiz

Sherry

Sign up for one of Sherry's coaching or psychotherapy packages here:

Sherrygaba.com/addiction-recovery/sessions-psychotherapy/rates-insurance/

Gain access to Sherry's FREE ebooks for codependency, love addiction, or narcissistic abuse. Relationship-quizzes.com

Carla

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Contagious Love | Online Dating Bootcamp

Wendy

Website | Disarming the Narcissist | Facebook | Instagram

Today's episode is sponsored by Carla's book Contagious Love: Break Free from Codependency for Damn Good and Sherry's book Love Smacked: How To Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency To Find Everlasting Love.

Thanks to Contagious Love and Love Smacked for sponsoring this episode.

Carla and Sherry start off the show with a conversation about buying expensive(ish) jeans, which leads to a deeper issue of how our spending typically reflects the way we were taught to feel about money as a child. They take a Love Fix question on getting over the fear that a new partner will be abusive and then welcome trailblazing expert The Little Shaman to the show. The Little Shaman talks about the most important things for people to understand about getting in a relationship with a narcissist, when the "honeymoon stage" really falls apart for a narcissist, and how to believe their true colors from the beginning, instead of trying to repaint them.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• What does it feel like to be addicted to someone, let alone to be addicted to a narcissist?
• The number one thing you can do with a narcissist — leave! You won't fix them.
• How can you begin to trust your gut and notice relationship red flags from the beginning?
• Everything that a narcissist believes someone else is doing to them is what THEY actually do.
• How to attend The Little Shaman's workshops on boundaries and healing, along with how to work with Sherry and Carla on overcoming codependency, dating, break-ups, healing from toxic relationships, and gaining confidence.
• The Little Shaman talks about her own experience with a narcissist, and how therapists and healers also can fall prey to one.
• What tips does The Little Shaman have for combating loneliness and feeling isolated instead of reaching out to a toxic ex?
• Some tips on dealing with no contact and weaning off an addiction to the relationship cycle.

Tweetables:

• "I think the most important thing for people to understand in relationships with a narcissist is that there's nothing you can do to fix this problem." - The Little Shaman
• "Everything that a narcissist believes someone else is doing to them is what narcissists actually do. - The Little Shaman
• "If you grew up in a co-dependent household with dysfunction or trauma, you don't have boundaries. You're a perfect little recipe to fall into these kinds of traps with a narcissist." - Carla
• "The first thing to remember is that the voice of addiction is sneaky. It's very, very sneaky and it will lie to you." - The Little Shaman
• "When someone shows you their true colors, stop trying to repaint them." - The Little Shaman
• "Narcissists want to be with someone who's successful, because that's great for their ego." - Sherry
• "Once you know what to look for, you can start seeing through it quickly. " The Little Shaman

Connect with Us!

• The Love Fix | @thelovefixpodcast
• Become a Member - Codependency Special - Wake Up Recovery - $1 trial membership
• Join the Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Relationship Transformation Challenge FB group
• The Love Fix Relationship Quiz

Sherry

Sign up for one of Sherry's coaching or psychotherapy packages here:

https://sherrygaba.com/addiction-recovery/sessions-psychotherapy/rates-insurance/

Gain access to Sherry's FREE ebooks for codependency, love addiction, or narcissistic abuse. https://relationship-quizzes.com/

Carla

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Contagious Love | Online Dating Bootcamp

Little Shaman: YouTube | Podcast | Instagram | Website

Today's episode is sponsored by Carla's book Contagious Love: Break Free from Codependency for Damn Good and Sherry's book Love Smacked: How To Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency To Find Everlasting Love.

Thanks to Contagious Love and Love Smacked for sponsoring this episode.

Sherry and Carla open up the show talking about aging gracefully and the culture of dating in Los Angeles, mixed with the pressure of finding that special someone. They then take a Love Fix question about red flags in a relationship and welcome one of today's most trusted relationship teachers, Elizabeth Earnshaw. Elizabeth talks about her standing as a renowned Gottman Therapist, a Licensed MFT, and influential IG therapist who has helped transform countless relationships. Elizabeth is also the head therapist at Actually, and author of I Want This To Work. In this super fun episode, Elizabeth gives her advice on when it's time to leave a relationship, tips for recognizing codependency, and where to begin when navigating modern-day dating issues.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• What does it mean to be a Gottman-certified therapist?
• The Four Horsemen: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. Let's break down each one and know how they play out in toxic relationships.
• Find out more about working with Elizabeth, along with how to work with Sherry and Carla on overcoming codependency, dating, break-ups, healing from toxic relationships, and gaining confidence.
• What is Elizabeth's advice for someone in a new relationship trying to tell if what they are witnessing is a red flag or just a data point.
• What are the most important things to be on the lookout for when starting a new relationship?
• When is it time to let go of a relationship?
• Elizabeth breaks down some of the obsession that codependents have with making others happy and tips for originating your own opinions and desires.

Tweetables:

• "Consistency is huge. When you're in a relationship and starting out with someone who disappears on you for a few days, that's already not a good sign." - Elizabeth
• "If in the very beginning, they're not acting like they think that you are very bright or that they think that you have interesting things to say, that's kind of a warning sign." - Elizabeth
• "I think what it comes down to is are you able to communicate, and are you able to repair? Do you have a baseline of respect and responsiveness and reliability in this relationship?" - Elizabeth
• "Having resentments in a relationship is a big red flag." - Carla
• "I don't have to be right and I can still hold on to my opinion, which is really important. And he can too." - Elizabeth
• "With narcissistic versus codependent behavior, it's this inability to hold both people at once." - Elizabeth

Connect with Us!

• The Love Fix | @thelovefixpodcast
• Become a Member - Codependency Special - Wake Up Recovery - $1 trial membership
• Join the Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Relationship Transformation Challenge FB group
• The Love Fix Relationship Quiz

Sherry

Sign up for one of Sherry's coaching or psychotherapy packages here:

https://sherrygaba.com/addiction-recovery/sessions-psychotherapy/rates-insurance/

Gain access to Sherry's FREE ebooks for codependency, love addiction, or narcissistic abuse. https://relationship-quizzes.com/

Carla

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Contagious Love | Online Dating Bootcamp

Elizabeth Earnshaw

Website | Instagram | Love Lessons

Today's episode is sponsored by Carla's book Contagious Love: Break Free from Codependency for Damn Good and Sherry's book Love Smacked: How To Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency To Find Everlasting Love.

Thanks to Contagious Love and Love Smacked for sponsoring this episode.

The Gottman Institute

The Four Horsemen

Sherry and Carla kick off this week with some TV talk about what they are currently watching and loving and then take a Love Fix Question on long-distance relationships. They then welcome Vanessa Bennett, Licensed Holistic Therapist, and codependency Expert, as well as co-host of the Cheaper Than Therapy podcast. Vanessa made the transition from corporate to wellness after years of doing her own inner work while always feeling like she was teetering on the edge of burnout. Described as the "cold water on the face" therapist, she gives it to us raw this week talking about codependency, the archetypes behind being a martyr and trauma bonding, and the importance of having a connection to something greater than yourself.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• A Love Fix Question about long-distance relationships, and Carla's first-hand advice as someone who had one and made it work!
• Vanessa explains what depth psychology is, and why it's known as the psychology of the soul.
• What are examples of common human archetypes, and how do codependency and trauma bonding fit in?
• More about Carl Jung, Swiss psychiatrist and psychologist, along with how he knew that real growth happens when there is a connection to something bigger than ourselves.
• Find out more about Vanessa's podcast, Cheaper Than Therapy, along with how to work with Sherry and Carla on overcoming codependency, dating, break-ups, healing from toxic relationships, and gaining confidence.
• So how do you look at codependency from a depth psychology viewpoint?
• Vanessa gives it to us real — why is being a martyr and acting in a co-dependent manner actually very manipulative and maladaptive?
• How does connecting with our soul's purpose just naturally help with codependent behaviors and thinking?
• What if there is a spiritual element to trauma bonding, such as a past life or karma?
• Vanessa's advice for those addicted to a narcissist, who keep seeing the same patterns pop up over and over.
• Boundary work takes time, and it's a lifelong commitment. But, when working with a coach or a professional, you can expect more resiliency within yourself and a deeper knowing of who you really are inside.
• Vanessa teases her new book out soon, It's Not Me, It's You.
• The one emotion we're all experts at naming? Resentment.

Tweetables:

• "I look at surrender as an active choice. We're participating in life when we choose to surrender to the moment." - Carla
• "We can understand what the soul is trying to speak to us and communicate. It not only helps us understand the behaviors we have to change, but also helps us connect a little more deeply to our meaning."- Vanessa
• "Co-dependent behaviors are manipulative and a way to get some kind of need met." - Vanessa
• "I think it's so powerful to have a spiritual source, whether it's religion or not." - Carla
• "I really believe everything that happens in our life has a greater purpose. Unfortunately, we don't always know what it is when we're in it, and for many of us, we are impatient, but sometimes you really have to let things unfold." - Sherry
• "Life is working for you." - Carla
• "There's no magic wand, you don't just become a boundary master. We're not healing deep attachment and abandonment wounds in three conversations over zoom therapy. This is probably going to be a lifetime of that, but what happens is your resiliency is going to get greater, your ability to call bullshit is going to be way shorter, and you'll bounce back quicker." - Vanessa

Connect with Us!

• The Love Fix | @thelovefixpodcast
• Become a Member - Codependency Special - Wake Up Recovery - $1 trial membership
• Join the Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Relationship Transformation Challenge FB group
• The Love Fix Relationship Quiz

Sherry

Sign up for one of Sherry's coaching or psychotherapy packages here:

https://sherrygaba.com/addiction-recovery/sessions-psychotherapy/rates-insurance/

Gain access to Sherry's FREE ebooks for codependency, love addiction, or narcissistic abuse. https://relationship-quizzes.com/

Carla

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Contagious Love | Online Dating Bootcamp

Vanessa

Cheaper Than Therapy | Instagram | TikTok

Today's episode is sponsored by Carla's book Contagious Love: Break Free from Codependency for Damn Good and Sherry's book Love Smacked: How To Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency To Find Everlasting Love.

Thanks to Contagious Love and Love Smacked for sponsoring this episode.

Sex Lives of College Girls

Ray Donovan

Sherry and Carla start by talking about what kind of podcasts they listen to, and Carla confesses her love for a good murder mystery. They take a Love Fix question from a listener that seems like she has the same issues in love, even while dating different men. Then, they welcome Codependency Recovery Coach Hailee Magee, who helps individuals of all ages break the people pleasing patterns, set empowered boundaries, and master the art of speaking their truth. Hailee shares why most people don't set or stick with their boundaries, and what's really going on under people's pleasing and codependency patterns, and how to begin starting to keep promises to yourself and gain confidence in saying that magical two letter word: "no".

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• A Love Fix Question - what do I do when the same issues keep coming up with different men that I date?
• Are co-dependents also manipulative people?
• In order to break the habit of codependency, we need to set boundaries and honor our own needs first.
• Find out more about Hailey's Codependency Recovery Coaching, along with how to work with Sherry and Carla on overcoming codependency, dating, a break-up, healing from toxic relationships, and gaining confidence.
• If we consistently break promises to ourselves, how do we expect others to respect our boundaries?
• Are boundaries really bendable?
• What was Hailey's paradigm shifting moment where she worked on her own codependency after a gut wrenching breakup?
• How do we start small to break our patterns of codependency?
• What are some of the biggest reasons people don't set boundaries?
• What do you do if someone doesn't respect your boundaries?
• What does Hailee find to be the root cause of pleasing people?
• How do you deal with emotions that come up when you break the people pleasing pattern?

Tweetables:

• "Yes, doing the work is important, but part of that work is being gentle and kind to yourself." - Carla
• "Feelings aren't facts."
• "Co-dependents are extremely manipulative people." - Carla
• "It's never productive to break up in the middle of an argument or make a really big life choice when you're emotionally charged or upset." - Carla
• "Codependency stems from a dysfunctional relationship with the self." - Hailey
• "We can't have a conversation about codependency if you don't talk about boundaries." - Sherry
• "In order to set a boundary and stand up for our needs, we need to know what those needs are." - Hailey
• "I really do think every boundary with someone else has to originate with an internal boundary with us." - Hailey

Connect with Us!

• The Love Fix | @thelovefixpodcast
• Become a Member - Codependency Special - Wake Up Recovery - $1 trial membership
• Join the Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Relationship Transformation Challenge FB group
• The Love Fix Relationship Quiz

Sign up for a Connection call with Sherry https://sherrygaba.com/coaching/life-coaching/

Find Out More:

Sherry

Psychotherapy Life Coaching Sherry Gaba Westlake Village | Instagram | Facebook | Love Smacked | Wake Up Recovery for Codependents and Toxic Relationships | Sherry Gaba's Coaching Packages

Gain access to Sherry's FREE ebooks for codependency, love addiction, or narcissistic abuse. https://relationship-quizzes.com/

Join the BRAND NEW, FREE, 5-Day Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Transformation Challenge, beginning Monday, February 14th

Carla

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Contagious Love | Online Dating Bootcamp

Hailey Magee

Website | Instagram | Say No Club

Today's episode is sponsored by Carla's book Contagious Love: Break Free from Codependency for Damn Good and Sherry's book Love Smacked: How To Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency To Find Everlasting Love.

Thanks to Contagious Love and Love Smacked for sponsoring this episode.

The show starts with a very special guest this week, Carla’s sister Stephanie! She spills on what it was really like growing up with Carla, why she will always think of Carla as the baby, and what she has learned as a loyal Love Fix listener. Then, they welcome Counselor, Trainer, and Body Oriented Coach, Elizabeth Barre. Through Elizabeth’s work, she helps people heal through embodied self-compassion by working with their whole system and creating more space and resilience into their experience. Elizabeth discusses how we can get addicted to trauma, what she does to help her clients become aware of their nervous system and build resources, and why love trauma can be the most addictive.

 

What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• A Love Fix Question — should I stay in my marriage if therapy just doesn’t seem to be working?
• Carla’s sister Stephanie weighs in on building good communication with your family, and why she will always think of Carla as the baby!
• What effects can trauma have on our physical bodies?
• What are peptides, and why does our body release them?
• Join Elizabeth’s wait list, along with how to work with Sherry and Carla on overcoming codependency, dating, a break-up, healing from toxic relationships, and gaining confidence.
• What is body-oriented coaching?
• Is there hope for retraining our body to regulate itself and gain more self-esteem, even if you’ve been co-dependent for so long?
• How can people be addicted to trauma? Why is this an extremely dangerous thing?
• How do we cope with that awful feeling during the “no contact” stage of ending a relationship?

 

Tweetables:

• “She’s an adult, but she’s still like my baby sister.” - Stephanie
• “Self-esteem comes from esteemable action.” - Elizabeth
• “Addictions to people can be even stronger than the addictions to substances.” - Elizabeth
• “Abusers tend to pick people they admire. It doesn’t discriminate.” - Elizabeth

 

Connect with Us!

• The Love Fix | @thelovefixpodcast
• Become a Member - Codependency Special - Wake Up Recovery  - $1 trial membership
• Join the Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Relationship Transformation Challenge FB group 
• The Love Fix Relationship Quiz

 

Sign up for a Connection call with Sherry https://sherrygaba.com/coaching/life-coaching/ 

 

Find Out More: 

 

Sherry

Psychotherapy Life Coaching Sherry Gaba Westlake Village  | Instagram | Facebook | Love Smacked | Wake Up Recovery for Codependents and Toxic Relationships | Sherry Gaba’s Coaching Packages

 

Gain access to Sherry’s FREE ebooks for codependency, love addiction, or narcissistic abuse. https://relationship-quizzes.com/ 

 

Join  the BRAND NEW, FREE, 5-Day Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Transformation Challenge, beginning Monday, February 14th

 

Carla

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Contagious Love | Online Dating Bootcamp

 

Elizabeth Barre: Website | Instagram 

 

Today’s episode is sponsored by Carla’s book Contagious Love: Break Free from Codependency for Damn Good and Sherry’s book Love Smacked: How To Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency To Find Everlasting Love. 

 

Thanks to Contagious Love and Love Smacked for sponsoring this episode.

Sherry and Carla kick off the show with a Love Fix Question about dealing with pressure in your late 30's and early 40's about having children, especially when you aren't sure what you really want. Then, they welcome Laura Behnke, writer, speaker, coach, and founder of The Life Actually company and podcast. Laura is a 16 year TV veteran and anchor, and left the business to follow her passion for supporting and empowering women in all phases of their life. Laura shares how she learned to stop "shoulding" on herself and no longer accept breadcrumbs, and why our past dating history doesn't always predict our future. She talks with Sherry and Carla about throwing away the rules and living a life that's authentically yours, no matter what it looks like to the outside world.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• A Love Fix Question — not sure if you want kids? How to untangle what you want your true future to be vs. what pressure society is putting on you.
• Are you creating stories in your head? How to get more into reality and grounded in your habits, thoughts, and actions.
• Laura shares her story of her husband being her first real boyfriend, and what she learned about herself in the experience.
• Why are dating rules unfair and unrealistic?
• Join The Life Actually community, along with how to work with Sherry and Carla on overcoming codependency, dating, a break-up, healing from toxic relationships and gaining confidence.
• Remember — you are perfectly loveable at all points across your journey and evolution.
• What are some of the biggest 'shoulds' in society that cause us to be a certain way?
• How is the way we mold ourselves to fit in society connected to codependency?

Tweetables:

• "We rarely ask, what do I want? What do I desire?" - Sherry
• "We have to remember, dating has become an industry. There are people who want to make money off your dating experience." - Laura
• "I believe self love is an ongoing journey. You never master it, it's always evolving." - Carla
• "It's all intertwined with codependency. It's this pressure to be something to please others and to please society to fit in and feel less alone." - Laura
• "At the end of the day, whatever works between the two of you is actually what is important. Otherwise, you get into the whole codependency stuff and living for other people." - Carla
• "Make the rules yourself." - Carla

Connect with Us!

• The Love Fix | @thelovefixpodcast
• Become a Member - Codependency Special - Wake Up Recovery - $1 trial membership
• Join the Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Relationship Transformation Challenge FB group
• The Love Fix Relationship Quiz

Sign up for a Connection call with Sherry https://sherrygaba.com/coaching/life-coaching/

Find Out More:

Sherry

Psychotherapy Life Coaching Sherry Gaba Westlake Village | Instagram | Facebook | Love Smacked | Wake Up Recovery for Codependents and Toxic Relationships | Sherry Gaba's Coaching Packages

Gain access to Sherry's FREE ebooks for codependency, love addiction, or narcissistic abuse. https://relationship-quizzes.com/

Carla

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Contagious Love | Online Dating Bootcamp

Laura Behnke:

Website | Instagram | Podcast

Today's episode is sponsored by Carla's book Contagious Love: Break Free from Codependency for Damn Good and Sherry's book Love Smacked: How To Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency To Find Everlasting Love.

Thanks to Contagious Love and Love Smacked for sponsoring this episode.

Sherry and Carla kick off this week talking about if it's really that sexy dating someone with an accent, or if we just romanticize it. Then they take a Love Fix Question about how to break the habit of lying in your relationship and welcome guest Anne-Marie Zanzal. Anne-Marie is a coach, ordained minister, chaplain, and author. She came out later in life and shares her journey from tucking away her sexuality while raising a family, to stepping into her true authentic self. She talks with Sherry and Carla about her work specializing in women coming out later in adulthood, why there still is a stigma around being gay, and how we can face our own internalized homophobia.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• A Love Fix Question — what do you do if you find yourself lying and constantly being dishonest in relationships?
• What are the main reasons people typically lie, and how can therapy help?
• Anne-Marie is known as the Coming Out Coach — how did she know she was gay? What are the ways that she hid it, and how did she decide to step fully into her truth?
• Is being gay as widely accepted in America as we think it is?
• Want Coming Out Coaching from someone who has walked the path before? Here's how to Contact Anne-Marie, along with how to work with Sherry and Carla on overcoming codependency, dating, a break-up, healing from toxic relationships and gaining confidence.
• Anne-Marie talks about being brushed off by her own (lesbian) therapist!
• What does Anne-Marie appreciate about dating women more than her past relationships with men?
• Is there an age where it's too late to come out?
• What about if you want to come out, but you have shame and another type of life already in place?
• What are some of the reasons women may know they are gay but don't come out until later in life?
• What is internalized homophobia, and how does it show up in ourselves and other people?

Tweetables:

• "Because there's visibility in the media and there's representation out there, I think people are less afraid to come out than they were in the past." - Anne-Marie
• "The truth is, the truth is going to come out." - Sherry
• "I really believe that sexuality is fluid." - Carla
• "All of a sudden, I was with women who understood, and we're talking about things that I had never said to another human being." - Anne-Marie
• "There's a lot of shame about a woman being a good girl. We want to live to a standard that is set by our families and our parents and our churches and our communities. When we don't do that, we feel like we've done something wrong. - Anne-Marie

Connect with Us!

• The Love Fix | @thelovefixpodcast
• Become a Member - Codependency Special - Wake Up Recovery - $1 trial membership
• Join the Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Relationship Transformation Challenge FB group
• The Love Fix Relationship Quiz

Sign up for a Connection call with Sherry https://sherrygaba.com/coaching/life-coaching/

Find Out More:

Sherry

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Love Smacked | Wake Up Recovery for Codependents and Toxic Relationships | Sherry Gaba's Coaching Packages

Gain access to Sherry's FREE ebooks for codependency, love addiction, or narcissistic abuse. https://relationship-quizzes.com/

Carla

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Contagious Love | Online Dating Bootcamp

Anne-Marie

Website | Instagram | Authentic Peace | Coming Out Later in Life Resources

Today's episode is sponsored by Carla's book Contagious Love: Break Free from Codependency for Damn Good and Sherry's book Love Smacked: How To Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency To Find Everlasting Love.

Thanks to Contagious Love and Love Smacked for sponsoring this episode.

Carla and Sherry start this week talking about how proud they are of their clients and how they love seeing them learn and grow. Then, they take a Love Fix question on how to let go of someone who shows red flags from the start, and then welcome Tara Blair Ball, author and Certified Relationship Coach. Tara talks about the work she does to help her clients foster happy healthy relationships, understand their attachment styles, and learn new ways of thinking and acting in a way that sets them up for their best relationship with themselves and others. Tara also shares the inspiration behind her book Grateful in Love and how it can help couples become even closer.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• A Love Fix question: should you let someone go the minute you feel an inappropriate ick?
• Yes, it's okay to block someone's number if you need to!
• Why anxious and avoidants are like magnets to each other.
• Is it really possible to make drastic changes and rewire your brain, or is one stuck in their attachment style for life?
• Ways to learn more about Tara, along with how to work with Sherry and Carla on overcoming codependency, dating, a break-up, healing from toxic relationships and gaining confidence.
• What are some productive ways to get us out of anxiety and get the energy moving?
• How expressive writing can help anxious attachers even more than meditation.
• How to use dating more as a way to gather information than a black and white super heavy situation?
• Can someone be both anxious AND avoidant?
• Stop being upset about the man equivalent of a frozen waffle!

Tweetables:

• "Rejection is protection." - Sherry
• "If you really know who you are and what you want, you are not going to second guess yourself." - Sherry
• "You do not have to wait to find out what that red flag or icky feeling is." - Carla
• "Is it easy to make drastic changes? No, it's rewiring how your brain works. It does take work and it often requires support and accountability." - Tara
• "I believe that the antidote to anxiety is action." - Tara
• "Expectations are just premeditated resentments." - Tara

Connect with Us!

• The Love Fix | @thelovefixpodcast
• Become a Member - Codependency Special - Wake Up Recovery - $1 trial membership
• Join the Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Relationship Transformation Challenge FB group
• The Love Fix Relationship Quiz

Sign up for a Connection call with Sherry https://sherrygaba.com/coaching/life-coaching/

Find Out More:

Sherry

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Love Smacked | Wake Up Recovery for Codependents and Toxic Relationships | Sherry Gaba's Coaching Packages

Gain access to Sherry's FREE ebooks for codependency, love addiction, or narcissistic abuse. https://relationship-quizzes.com/

Carla

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Contagious Love | Online Dating Bootcamp

Tara Blair Ball

Website | Grateful In Love | TikTok | Instagram

Today's episode is sponsored by Carla's book Contagious Love: Break Free from Codependency for Damn Good and Sherry's book Love Smacked: How To Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency To Find Everlasting Love.

Thanks to Contagious Love and Love Smacked for sponsoring this episode.

Sherry and Carla kick off this week talking about their morning routine and the importance of getting a little exercise in, and then welcome in Personal Stylist and Dating Coach Alyssa Dineen, founder of Style My Profile. Alyssa shares her story of being new to the dating market at age 41 after a divorce, and how she saw a need for helping both men and women get their profiles maximized and ready to find long lasting matches. She combined her experience as a stylist for over 20 years, and now is helping online daters all around the world transform their destiny by intentional and mindful dating, and self-discovery. Alyssa also talks with Sherry and Carla about her new book, The Art of Online Dating, not discriminating your dating qualifications, why both photos and a great bio are important, and why Style My Profile may be great for you.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• A Love Fix question - my partner doesn't accept that I'm a single mom and they are too enmeshed in their families beliefs. Should I let them go or keep fighting?
• How did Alyssa learn to navigate the online world of dating when she found herself single and in unchartered waters at 41?
• What are the differences Alyssa sees in working with clients ages 40 and up vs. millennials and GenZ in terms of how they view online dating?
• Want to get your profile styled? Ways to reach Alyssa, along with how to work with Sherry and Carla on overcoming codependency, dating, a break-up, healing from toxic relationships, and gaining confidence.
• Alyssa talks about creating and publishing her new book, The Art of Online Dating.
• Should you reach out to a ghoster? Furthermore, how can you let someone down with empathy and not be a ghoster yourself?
• How to be straightforward when you are being breadcrumbed. Learn from Sherry and stop the madness!
• All about the photos and bios: why it's important, what you should put, and what you may want to leave out.
• What is mindful or intentional dating?
• It's about being open and not pigeonholing yourself, and the ladies give some examples of love matches that happened only because people met IRL.

Tweetables:

• "I don't think the age difference actually really matters. It sucks to be chatting with somebody and actually go on a date with somebody and then never hear from them again." - Carla
• "Along the way here in the online dating world, it became acceptable in a way to just drop somebody." - Alyssa
• 'If you're codependent, what you want to check off on your box might not also be healthy for you." - Carla
• "I'm a real believer in doing a really great bio." - Alyssa
• "Whatever it is you want, I think you have to be really clear with yourself ahead of time." - Alyssa
• "You might end up falling in love with somebody that's not any of those things that you thought you needed, and it might totally work." Alyssa
• "Sometimes we have to open up our horizons a little bit. I feel sorry for those guys that aren't tall. Come on my way!" - Sherry

Connect with Us!

• The Love Fix | @thelovefixpodcast
• Become a Member - Codependency Special - Wake Up Recovery - $1 trial membership
• Join the Narcissistic Abuse and Codependent Relationship Transformation Challenge FB group
• The Love Fix Relationship Quiz

Sign up for a Connection call with Sherry https://sherrygaba.com/coaching/life-coaching/

Find Out More:

Peloton

The Big Sick

Dating Advice for Those Who Never Thought They Would Need Tinder

Taylor Swift - "All Too Well"

Sherry

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Love Smacked | Wake Up Recovery for Codependents and Toxic Relationships | Sherry Gaba's Coaching Packages

Gain access to Sherry's FREE ebooks for codependency, love addiction, or narcissistic abuse. https://relationship-quizzes.com/

Carla

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Contagious Love | Online Dating Bootcamp

Alyssa Dineen

Website | The Art of Online Dating | Facebook | Instagram | Style My Profile

Today's episode is sponsored by Carla's book Contagious Love: Break Free from Codependency for Damn Good and Sherry's book Love Smacked: How To Stop the Cycle of Relationship Addiction and Codependency To Find Everlasting Love.

Thanks to Contagious Love and Love Smacked for sponsoring this episode.